Asking a client for a face pic.

[JMatt]

Generally, my response is "no, thank you."  And it's a deal breaker for me if it's a requirement. 

[fs12395]

I'm happy you raised this issue. It's become more common and I wasn't sure if I was the only one who feels like it's a deal-breaker. I am looking for discretion when I book with someone, and the idea of someone having my picture is uncomfortable. If a person cancels an appointment because I'm ugly, I guess no problem. It's the discretion that matters mroe to me. Some masseurs who have requested it are saying that it's for their safety...so I don't know what started that trend.

[BuffaloKyle]

I've had escorts ask for it but a face pic for a massage!?

[JamesB]

I have had this request only a couple of times but for me is a red flag and a deal breaker. I just said: I guess we are not a good match, thank you for your time and have a great day.

[ericwinters]

No pics, no pics, no pics.

You just don't know what will happen at a later point in time.

I develop lots of young managers and one of the things I teach them is...  your employees may love you today, but in the blip of a second, they could hate you and turn. Love you today, hate you tomorrow.... always exercise caution. Anything on a server will be there, somewhere, forever... with enough time and money to find it. Even if the escort or employee does not turn, someone else could.

I know I sound super paranoid, but it is a deal breaker for me if the escort requires a pic.

[Guest]

Hmm, interesting. I’ve only been asked a couple times. I’ve provided it, though now thinking twice about future requests. Thanks for the info.

[SouthOfTheBorder]

2 hours ago, fs12395 said:

I am looking for discretion when I book with someone, and the idea of someone having my picture is uncomfortable.

I think it depends on context.  If they want a pic before appointment scheduling, then no.  If they want a pic after appointment confirmed, then I’d probably send it because I can understand it from a security point of view - but I would only do that if meeting the person at their home or hotel. 

Scheduling with a new provider requires a certain amount of trust.  If you’re going into their environment whether home or hotel - they could easily record the entire session and you’d never know.  Thats the reality. 

[+ glutes]

Asking a client for a face pic.

[cbnyc]

You guys are paranoid. Maybe the provider just wants to know who he is inviting into his home.

[fs12395]

1 hour ago, cbnyc said:

You guys are paranoid. Maybe the provider just wants to know who he is inviting into his home.

Call us paranoid if you like, but I'm not sure that not wanting to send selfies of oneself is really paranoia. What if I'm a closeted doctor fearful of being outed, what if I'm locally known, what if there's a high chance of being recognized and my private life exposed that I'm trying to keep secret? I don't think it's paranoia to not want my picture 'out there'. Many people don't want their pics even up on social media. If someone is out already or just doesn't mind anyone finding out about their sessions, all power to them. It doesn't mean that those not like that are paranoid. 

I realize as @SouthOfTheBorder said, that I could be secretly being recorded. That's not in my control. The risk that is in my hands is all that I can control and nothing else. There's a gamble being taken by both the provider and the client, and both acknowledge that. Trying to think of ways to protect everyone is a smart idea, but I don't think requiring a photo does much to really provide security. If it's to identify who's at the door, then asking for a description is as secure as asking for a photo. Again, at the end of the day, both sides are accepting a certain level of risk.

[+ KensingtonHomo]

I don't understand the caution here. If you send a pic, what's going to happen? If it's a G-rated pic, there are likely several of you on social media that anyone could download or screen grab. A naughty masseur having one doesn't mean anything. Do you think they can prove you sent it? If so, who would care? 

If you're someone who avoids social media altogether, then I can understand it. But there are so many pictures of me on the Internet, I would say, "I guess they downloaded that from my Facebook profile," and move on... 

If I'm going to a provider's home (or hotel), I generally offer to send a face pic so they know who is showing up. 

[Penn7]

I think the only way I would do this would be if they’re ok using an app like WhatsApp or telegram where you can set a photo to disappear after viewing.

[fs12395]

5 minutes ago, KensingtonHomo said:

I don't understand the caution here. If you send a pic, what's going to happen? If it's a G-rated pic, there are likely several of you on social media that anyone could download or screen grab. A naughty masseur having one doesn't mean anything. Do you think they can prove you sent it? If so, who would care? 

If you're someone who avoids social media altogether, then I can understand it. But there are so many pictures of me on the Internet, I would say, "I guess they downloaded that from my Facebook profile," and move on... 

If I'm going to a provider's home (or hotel), I generally offer to send a face pic so they know who is showing up. 

I am one of those who avoids social media altogether.

It seems like most people are debating just the effect of sending a pic, but to me, the demand itself is not reasonable. It's one thing to ask for a pic, another to require it. "hey, would you be willing..." is not the same as "I require a face pic".   

What if we were to reverse the demand? How many providers would be okay with the client demanding face pics of those masseurs who do not post face pics on their ads? Again, asking is not the same as requiring. I'm not okay with being required to send a pic, personally. Like I said above, if others are okay with it, all power to them, but I'm not. I care very much about discretion, and anything in my control with respect to discretion, I want to control. I do think, for me, it's a big deal to send my picture to someone I don't even know. To be required to take such a risk, is, in my view, unreasonable.

 

 

 

 

[FLJock]

Curious, has anyone ever sent a photo only to have the (future) appointment cancelled by the provider? 

[Guest]

4 hours ago, SouthOfTheBorder said:

I think it depends on context.  If they want a pic before appointment scheduling, then no.  If they want a pic after appointment confirmed, then I’d probably send it because I can understand it from a security point of view - but I would only do that if meeting the person at their home or hotel. 

Scheduling with a new provider requires a certain amount of trust.  If you’re going into their environment whether home or hotel - they could easily record the entire session and you’d never know.  Thats the reality. 

This is my view.  I wouldn't send a face pic before the appointment is confirmed.  However, after the appointment is confirmed and I receive the address information, I will usually send my face pic to let them know what I look like.  I'm not nude in the pic and I haven't discussed anything but a massage appointment in the text. Then I am OK sending a pic once scheduled.

[Guest]

15 minutes ago, FLJock said:

Curious, has anyone ever sent a photo only to have the (future) appointment cancelled by the provider? 

Yes. I got the "oops I double booked" response.

[+ KensingtonHomo]

3 hours ago, fs12395 said:

I am one of those who avoids social media altogether.

It seems like most people are debating just the effect of sending a pic, but to me, the demand itself is not reasonable. It's one thing to ask for a pic, another to require it. "hey, would you be willing..." is not the same as "I require a face pic".  

I think requiring a face pic to meet is silly for a masseur. It probably leads to them having fewer clients overall. 

And if people are anti-social media or keeping their lives very discrete, I think we should all be supportive of that. 

My issue is with guys who are all over Instagram and everywhere else but scoff at sending one to a provider, particularly one who has lots of pictures on their profile. 

[The Dude]

9 hours ago, cbnyc said:

You guys are paranoid. Maybe the provider just wants to know who he is inviting into his home.

Once you send out a picture you have no control over what someone does with it.  Better paranoid than sorry.

[BriansBodywork]

17 hours ago, fs12395 said:

I'm happy you raised this issue. It's become more common and I wasn't sure if I was the only one who feels like it's a deal-breaker. I am looking for discretion when I book with someone, and the idea of someone having my picture is uncomfortable. If a person cancels an appointment because I'm ugly, I guess no problem. It's the discretion that matters mroe to me. Some masseurs who have requested it are saying that it's for their safety...so I don't know what started that trend.

I’ve been able to find many a potential clients face pic without asking for one. Your number can lead to your name, your name can lead to Facebook, and there you have it. So much for being discrete! Sometimes Mr. Number will give the name of the client and the origin of the phone number then you can search for that potential client on Facebook. Sometimes you can even Google the number and get the clients info, including name and address! My doorbell camera is gonna get that picture when you show up anyways😜

Edited December 4, 2023 by BriansBodywork

[fs12395]

1 hour ago, BriansBodywork said:

I’ve been able to find many a potential clients face pic without asking for one. Your number can lead to your name, your name can lead to Facebook, and there you have it. So much for being discrete! Sometimes Mr. Number will give the name of the client and the origin of the phone number then you can search for that potential client on Facebook. Sometimes you can even Google the number and get the clients info, including name and address! My doorbell camera is gonna get that picture when you show up anyways😜

Yes, understood. As I keep saying though, my issue is about requiring it more than it is just about what could be done.

[Simon Suraci]

There’s no reason a masseur or escort needs your face or body photos. It’s a red flag that they’re probably cherry picking clients based on whatever preferences they have. I suggest clients pass and move on to the professionals with no hangups about how their clients look.

[JamesB]

1 hour ago, Simon Suraci said:

There’s no reason a masseur or escort needs your face or body photos. It’s a red flag that they’re probably cherry picking clients based on whatever preferences they have. I suggest clients pass and move on to the professionals with no hangups about how their clients look.

Agree 100%

[DamizzonNYC]

Yeah, maybe I’m in the minority here, but this is crazy to me.  
 

One of the benefits of hiring is - or should be? - that you’re free of having to offer yourself up for evaluation and approval in order to have a sexually rewarding experience.  Isn’t that part of what you’re paying for?
 

And isn’t our #1 job skill an ability to find the actual sexiness in all men and reflect it back to them?  An escort asking for pics … I’d wonder if he has that skill at all.  

[marylander1940]

Asking for a face picture for a massage? It's not like the client expects the whole BFE and the masseur wants to make sure he can perform, right? Oops I forgot about the HE

[marylander1940]

16 hours ago, KensingtonHomo said:

I think requiring a face pic to meet is silly for a masseur. It probably leads to them having fewer clients overall. 

And if people are anti-social media or keeping their lives very discrete, I think we should all be supportive of that. 

My issue is with guys who are all over Instagram and everywhere else but scoff at sending one to a provider, particularly one who has lots of pictures on their profile. 

Some masseurs and specially escorts want to make sure the client is HWP because they may not be able to perform with someone who isn't. I think if that's their approach they are in the wrong business.