Do most escorts wear condoms?

[Guest]

12 hours ago, LookingAround said:

Reading this thread I kept looking to see what year it was being written in. Like 2008?

Gentlemen, it’s 2023. Have you heard of Descovy or Apretude?

I consider condoms unsafe and Apretude as safer sex. 

Oh god this is the attitude I hate in the gay community. It is one thing to fuck bare it is another thing to convince yourself it is actually the safer/better option. PrEP is great but using a condom is always going to make sex safer regardless of the circumstances. 

Apretude only protects against one STD. Condoms protect against multiple STDs and don't carry the risk of liver damage or diarrhea. Not everyone can take PrEP either. Sure HIV infections are going down but every other STD infection rate is spiking in the gay community. Condoms are not "unsafe."

Everyone has their own risk tolerance and I respect that but I can't stand this holier than thou attitude in the gay community about this. I've gotten too many lectures about "safety" from strangers on Grindr after I told them I didn't want to fuck raw. Like get over it lol.

[SirBillybob]

1 hour ago, BiDude420 said:

Oh god this is the attitude I hate in the gay community. It is one thing to fuck bare it is another thing to convince yourself it is actually the safer/better option. PrEP is great but using a condom is always going to make sex safer regardless of the circumstances. 

Apretude only protects against one STD. Condoms protect against multiple STDs and don't carry the risk of liver damage or diarrhea. Not everyone can take PrEP either. Sure HIV infections are going down but every other STD infection rate is spiking in the gay community. Condoms are not "unsafe."

Everyone has their own risk tolerance and I respect that but I can't stand this holier than thou attitude in the gay community about this. I've gotten too many lectures about "safety" from strangers on Grindr after I told them I didn't want to fuck raw. Like get over it lol.

I have not personally faced this, but what could be more understandable than dismay when possessing an ironclad clinical understanding of STI prevention yet running up against stigma imposed by peers when we are all ideally in this together? Fortunately, there does seem to be some consensus here that various prevention strategies have their place.

Edited September 5, 2023 by SirBillybob

[SometimesBi]

2 hours ago, DWnyc said:

Why would condoms be unsafe? 

we can debate whether condoms (without prep /ART) are less safe than prep/ART or whether condoms add anything to safety in conjunction … but what makes them unsafe independently? 

Totally unscientific, 100% baseless opinion here...

Perhaps the concept is that a guy that is on PreP / U==U / etc, is doing so many frequent tests that they likely don't have anything to transmit. 

Meanwhile, a guy that requires condoms may never have been tested for anything (figuring the condoms are all the protection they need) and thus may be carrying something transmissable? Oral, kissing, fingering, even just their jizz getting on you, all could be risky depending what they might have?

So yes, condoms give safety for the act of sex, vs going bare.

But for the overall encounter, might playing with someone who requires condoms be less safe than playing with someone prepared for bareback?

[+ BobPS]

[DWnyc]

1 hour ago, BiDude420 said:

I can't stand this holier than thou attitude in the gay community about this. I've gotten too many lectures about "safety" from strangers on Grindr after I told them I didn't want to fuck raw. Like get over it lol.

Agreed

It seems like we’ve replaced the “sero sorting” divide with a new one.

The thing is, whether providers or online hookups, strangers (who lecture) remaining strangers is not a problem.

(I’ll add that I’ve received many a lecture on the topic from providers who otherwise apparently don’t have time for questions prior to booking)

[LookingAround]

4 hours ago, BiDude420 said:

Oh god this is the attitude I hate in the gay community. It is one thing to fuck bare it is another thing to convince yourself it is actually the safer/better option. PrEP is great but using a condom is always going to make sex safer regardless of the circumstances. 

Apretude only protects against one STD. Condoms protect against multiple STDs and don't carry the risk of liver damage or diarrhea. Not everyone can take PrEP either. Sure HIV infections are going down but every other STD infection rate is spiking in the gay community. Condoms are not "unsafe."

Everyone has their own risk tolerance and I respect that but I can't stand this holier than thou attitude in the gay community about this. I've gotten too many lectures about "safety" from strangers on Grindr after I told them I didn't want to fuck raw. Like get over it lol.

Such a specious argument. To follow your logic, do you wear a mask when you fuck? Because the risk of COVID is real and 11% of those who get COVID get Long COVID. What do you make of that?

[SirBillybob]

1 hour ago, LookingAround said:

Such a specious argument. To follow your logic, do you wear a mask when you fuck? Because the risk of COVID is real and 11% of those who get COVID get Long COVID. What do you make of that?

I have face coverings in various colours. Non-sequinned wear. 

Edited September 5, 2023 by SirBillybob

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

23 hours ago, LookingAround said:

Such a specious argument. To follow your logic, do you wear a mask when you fuck? Because the risk of COVID is real and 11% of those who get COVID get Long COVID. What do you make of that?

For safety against respiratory viruses like the seasonal flu or the virus from 2019 China, I prefer doggy style position so faces are six feet apart instead of wearing masks.

As for condoms/bare with prep, just compromise!  Start with a condom, then end bareback.  Best of both worlds!

[Keenan]

On 8/23/2023 at 3:59 PM, socurious said:

Do you escorts lose clients for not wanting to have unprotected sex? I want to know how you feel about it. 

First let me start by saying that using protection is important but of course not all clients want to have protected sex so what do we do as an escort, lose the money or comply?  I feel that as an escort it's our job to cater as much as possible to the client needs.  We need to be ready and potentially assume some risk.  Each escort will make their own decisions and shouldn't be shamed for their decision.  While there is PrEP and Doxy PeP neither are 100% effective I have made the decision that as an escort its a necessary tool to take these.  Furthermore I don't want to turn away any clients within reason so if they want unprotected sex I want to make sure that on my end I am taking the precautions to protect myself.  Yes there is risk as an escort but I understand the risks and want to make sure I can offer clients as much of me as I can.

[Guest]

On 9/5/2023 at 1:56 PM, LookingAround said:

Such a specious argument. To follow your logic, do you wear a mask when you fuck? Because the risk of COVID is real and 11% of those who get COVID get Long COVID. What do you make of that?

Yea and we might get cancer one day so why bother wearing seatbelts?

This is the bs I'm talking about. Quit trying to shame people into fucking raw.

 

[Guest]

On 8/31/2023 at 7:36 AM, Jamie21 said:

You’re very understanding. As a provider I’ve had incidences where I’ve bottomed for the client and unfortunately it’s been a bit messy. Even if you think you have prepared thoroughly and are confident about being clean it can happen. Therefore I try to be understanding and not make a drama out of it. 

I feel a song coming on....

 

[Guest]

12 hours ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

For safety against respiratory viruses like the seasonal flu or the virus from 2019 China, I prefer doggy style position so faces are six feet apart instead of wearing masks.

As for condoms/bare with prep, just compromise!  Start with a condom, then end bareback.  Best of both worlds!

I'm trusting this post was intended to be humorous. 

[NyGold]

On 9/5/2023 at 5:09 AM, LookingAround said:

In the gay community I know, condom utilization is close to zero. 

You wouldn’t think it taking a poll of some of the lecturing voices on this forum 

I personally do like protection in provider client situations and I seek providers sometimes precisely because I can control that part of an encounter which I definitely can’t in a hookup where that can be a deal breaker 

 

[Nodalguy]

On 9/5/2023 at 4:09 AM, LookingAround said:

In the gay community I know, condom utilization is close to zero. 

With PrEP, Doxy-PEP, and HPV and other vaccines, the main thing you need to watch out for is anyone with an open sore that could indicate a viral infection flareup, which is not common. (Not a doctor, they will probably tell you something very different out of an (over)abundance of caution.)

[pubic_assistance]

On 9/5/2023 at 9:31 AM, BiDude420 said:

It is one thing to fuck bare. It is another thing to convince yourself it is actually the safer/better option. PrEP is great but using a condom is always going to make sex safer regardless of the circumstances. 

There are many bits of mass hallucination in the gay communiity. THIS is one of the major bits of insanity.

[socurious]

Damn. I just noticed the massive mispelling I did when making this thread. 

WEAR.

[NyGold]

2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

There are many bits of mass hallucination in the gay communiity. THIS is one of the major bits of insanity.

I’ve just come to accept that there is less or no space for people like me in the “community” because of this one issue (condoms) - but then again I’m over 29 … so I was due to be put out to pasture anyway. 

[Nodalguy]

1 hour ago, NyGold said:

... but then again I’m over 29 … so I was due to be put out to pasture anyway. 

I found it incredible how much one's life changes as a gay man the moment one hits 30. Not completely dead but effectively moribund.

[NyGold]

5 minutes ago, Nodalguy said:

I found it incredible how much one's life changes as a gay man the moment one hits 30. Not completely dead but effectively moribund.

And that’s why providers who are clearly 40+ are still 29 on the site …. 

 

 

[NyGold]

4 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

There are many bits of mass hallucination in the gay communiity. THIS is one of the major bits of insanity.

Together with “everything they told your (ie anyone older than 30) generation about condoms was a lie”

The kids today don’t appreciate the medical miracles of Prep and ART - and they also think condoms were some sort of good luck charm used in pagan worship before the arrival of true religion made people realize they were always ridiculous. 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

4 hours ago, socurious said:

Damn. I just noticed the massive mispelling I did when making this thread. 

WEAR.

It's been gnawing at me since inception. 

I appreciate the correction. 

Pedantics of the world, unite. 

[MikeBiDude]

5 hours ago, socurious said:

Damn. I just noticed the massive mispelling I did when making this thread. 

WEAR.

53 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

It's been gnawing at me since inception.

I fixed it.

[mike carey]

1 hour ago, MikeBiDude said:

I fixed it.

Where, ware, wear ...

Don't we just love a homonym. Or is it a homophone. (Or are these three both?) Must be something about the name.

[+ nycman]

50 minutes ago, mike carey said:

Don't we just love a homonym. Or is it a homophone.

What did you just call me ?!?!

grin

[Nodalguy]

11 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

It's been gnawing at me since inception. 

Yes, it was causing me actual pain, but I was a good boy and refrained from saying anything for a bit 🤫.