Dangerous encounter

[+ Coolwave35]

This is awful that this happened to you. 
 

no one should ever have to go through this!  
 

except all of us forum members you’re not arming with enough information to protect ourselves. 

[+ purplekow]

17 hours ago, robberbaron4u said:

 I am in agreement with this post. However, in my own experience in having issued a warning with regard to an escort, sticks and stones came my way, and, thereby, I do appreciate the initial poster's reticence in identifying the escort.

And despite those brickbats you are still here and perhaps, other have been spared a bad and or dangerous experience.   Reluctance makes sense, but given time, one choses to be brave, or not.  

[SirBillybob]

Rumour has it that there is very little shared about escorts in the Brazil trade scene. Apparently somebody joked about an ‘office pool’ type of prediction in relation to msg brd comments of any nature posted about an escort there. Essentially, the door prize accorded to the person closest to forecasting the number of hours before a third party reports for dutiful disclosure of the commentary, and by what poster, directly to the escort involved. It might be to ingratiate self with the escort. It might be to underscore that he has been referenced as good, bad, in between, what have you. It might just be to fill up some disposable time. It might conceivably be appended with a post screenshot.

Besides which, names, trade names, ads are in a constant state of flux.

I would trust an unknown escort at any arbitrary distance thrown more than the distance equated to relying on an unknown cadre of punters with whom information about an escort were to be revealed. I think the us-them dialectic is coloured with shades of grey.

No vigilante stance is constructed without an apparently legitimate philosophy underpinning it. If something goes really awry it is a police matter.

Edited June 11, 2023 by SirBillybob

[marylander1940]

If nobody is named why is this thread posted in the deli?

[MikeBiDude]

14 minutes ago, SirBillybob said:

Rumour has it that there is very little shared about escorts in the Brazil trade scene. Apparently somebody joked about an ‘office pool’ type of prediction in relation to msg brd comments of any nature posted about an escort there. Essentially, the door prize accorded to the person closest to forecasting the number of hours before a third party reports for dutiful disclosure of the commentary, and by what poster, directly to the escort involved. It might be to ingratiate self with the escort. It might be to underscore that he has been referenced as good, bad, in between, what have you. It might just be to fill up some disposable time. It might conceivably be appended with a post screenshot.

Besides which, names, trade names, ads are in a constant state of flux.

I would trust an unknown escort at any arbitrary distance thrown more than the distance equated to relying on an unknown cadre of punters with whom information about an escort were to be revealed. I think the us-them dialectic is coloured with shades of grey.

Warning, verbose off topic posts…stick to the OP topic…this thread close to being locked, warning here first.

[Levyrel]

I’m sorry to hear that!

I also had a dangerous experience with a provider, he had a gun on the dresser pointed to me and as much as we try to be rational, at the time we freeze and don’t know how to act.

We surely want to know who was it to make sure we avoid him, but if you feel unsafe to reveal, it’s totally understandable. Thank you for sharing.

[SirBillybob]

7 minutes ago, Levyrel said:

I’m sorry to hear that!

I also had a dangerous experience with a provider, he had a gun on the dresser pointed to me and as much as we try to be rational, at the time we freeze and don’t know how to act.

We surely want to know who was it to make sure we avoid him, but if you feel unsafe to reveal, it’s totally understandable. Thank you for sharing.

Wow. The firearm sounds strategic. Did you figure out the relation between that terrifying prop and its purpose? For example messaging he is in charge and you had better grasp that? A means of extracting something of value from you?

Edited June 11, 2023 by SirBillybob

[Levyrel]

2 minutes ago, SirBillybob said:

Wow. The firearm sounds strategic. Did you figure out the relation between that terrifying prop and its purpose? For example messaging he is in charge and you had better grasp that? A means of extracting something of value from you?

I don’t know for sure, I never had problems with any other provider ever.

He got mad with me because he wanted to do raw and I refused to let him in without a condom. It never got physical , but the gun scared me. I guess that was his intention

[SirBillybob]

4 minutes ago, Levyrel said:

I don’t know for sure, I never had problems with any other provider ever.

He got mad with me because he wanted to do raw and I refused to let him in without a condom. It never got physical , but the gun scared me. I guess that was his intention

You impressively stood your ground and made the right call under duress. That’s the important thing. 

Edited June 11, 2023 by SirBillybob

[+ SundayZip]

The OP may have a good reason to not post the provider's identify or even the city. I had an unfortunate interaction with a provider a few years ago after which he did something very vindictive. I did not want to post his identify or even what happened for fear that he would recognize me and retaliate. I've since learned that he is that sort of person. Although, I too, would like to know the identify of the provider, I'm inclined to respect the OPs decision to not post it.

[SirBillybob]

I’m trying to understand the post forum placements. If it were Lounge would the interest in provider identity possibly have been less? I think some of my responses would have fit better in Lounge; not sure.

AFAIK the richly conceived plan of master Deli threads will help steer post placement. 

Edited June 11, 2023 by SirBillybob

[Walt]

47 minutes ago, SirBillybob said:

I’m trying to understand the post forum placements. If it were Lounge would the interest in provider identity possibly have been less?

AFAIK the richly conceived plan of master Deli threads will help steer post placement. 

Excellent question!  I am also wondering why the following post which is similar in some ways didn't include a similar volume of demands for the the original poster to name the perpetrator.

 

[KrisParr]

Okay, this may be a crazy idea, but here goes. I, too, have been the victim (once) of a similar violent encounter. And I also ignored some warning signs. Things didn’t escalate until the end, but it scared me shitless, and with lots of self defense training, I don’t usually freak out. But he had a weapon; I did not.  Anyhow, my idea would be for subscribers here to post any bad/violent/life threatening encounters and send directly to an administrator. The admin would simply lift the name and city of the provider and post in a forum marked “negative comments received” and leave it at that. So let’s say that I had a bad experience with Tom Cruise. I send in my review and Tom’s name goes on the list. In a month or two, Tom (who we hope is an avid reader of our forum) sees his name and says, WTF? Tom could contact admin, and admin would send a highly redacted copy of what was posted with absolutely no identifying information.  Tom could then review what was said about him and could post a rebuttal or not. And that would be the end of it. Here’s where it could get interesting- what if another client hires Tom and likewise has a bad experience - and also sends admin a review.  Tom’s name would then have 2 check marks, etc.  Worth a shot? And the list would be reserved only for truly encounters that were “holy shit, I gotta get out of here” type. Not the “he didn’t get me off” ones. Make sense? If we can do one thing to prevent a fellow aficionado from getting hurt, or worse, we need to step up.

[KeepItReal]

18 minutes ago, KrisParr said:

Okay, this may be a crazy idea, but here goes. I, too, have been the victim (once) of a similar violent encounter. And I also ignored some warning signs. Things didn’t escalate until the end, but it scared me shitless, and with lots of self defense training, I don’t usually freak out. But he had a weapon; I did not.  Anyhow, my idea would be for subscribers here to post any bad/violent/life threatening encounters and send directly to an administrator. The admin would simply lift the name and city of the provider and post in a forum marked “negative comments received” and leave it at that. So let’s say that I had a bad experience with Tom Cruise. I send in my review and Tom’s name goes on the list. In a month or two, Tom (who we hope is an avid reader of our forum) sees his name and says, WTF? Tom could contact admin, and admin would send a highly redacted copy of what was posted with absolutely no identifying information.  Tom could then review what was said about him and could post a rebuttal or not. And that would be the end of it. Here’s where it could get interesting- what if another client hires Tom and likewise has a bad experience - and also sends admin a review.  Tom’s name would then have 2 check marks, etc.  Worth a shot? And the list would be reserved only for truly encounters that were “holy shit, I gotta get out of here” type. Not the “he didn’t get me off” ones. Make sense? If we can do one thing to prevent a fellow aficionado from getting hurt, or worse, we need to step up.

This was the purpose of the review site. 

[marylander1940]

10 minutes ago, KeepItReal said:

This was the purpose of the review site. 

Yes, and there was also the issue of no reviews allowed in the forum.

[+ Coolwave35]

2 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

Yes, and there was also the issue of no reviews allowed in the forum.

Which I believe has changed. 

[MikeBiDude]

1 hour ago, Coolwave35 said:

Which I believe has changed. 

Correct, as stated in the “header” of The Deli Forum Rules.

[+ DrownedBoy]

I think we've all been there.

The 2 dangerous escorts I was with, there were major warning signs that I figured I could handle. But simply "handling" the situation doesn't bring back the money and time you lost.

[Anthony]

This thread is honestly why I fear so much about meeting anyone. Also, the lack of information is only exacerbating my fears. Are there really providers pulling guns out? Are all the reviews on this site exclusively from people who live in the USA? How can this be acceptable? Did the provider that had the dangerous encounters with have positive reviews? Could providers fake their reviews just to extort us for our money? I have too many questions and there's not enough info to figure it out myself   

[SouthOfTheBorder]

7 minutes ago, Anthony said:

This thread is honestly why I fear so much about meeting anyone

some healthy anxiety around meeting an unknown provider is a good thing.  
if you stick to a few basic rules you’ll be fine; only hire extremely well reviewed providers (many reviews with some recent), or publicly known people (porn stars or online influencers) and meet them in a public setting where you can gauge behavior before getting into a private situation.

It’s still not without some risk, but you can significantly reduce chances of something going wrong.  Trust your instinct and don’t be afraid to walk away.

[SirBillybob]

 

22 hours ago, KrisParr said:

Okay, this may be a crazy idea, but here goes. I, too, have been the victim (once) of a similar violent encounter. And I also ignored some warning signs. Things didn’t escalate until the end, but it scared me shitless, and with lots of self defense training, I don’t usually freak out. But he had a weapon; I did not.  Anyhow, my idea would be for subscribers here to post any bad/violent/life threatening encounters and send directly to an administrator. The admin would simply lift the name and city of the provider and post in a forum marked “negative comments received” and leave it at that. So let’s say that I had a bad experience with Tom Cruise. I send in my review and Tom’s name goes on the list. In a month or two, Tom (who we hope is an avid reader of our forum) sees his name and says, WTF? Tom could contact admin, and admin would send a highly redacted copy of what was posted with absolutely no identifying information.  Tom could then review what was said about him and could post a rebuttal or not. And that would be the end of it. Here’s where it could get interesting- what if another client hires Tom and likewise has a bad experience - and also sends admin a review.  Tom’s name would then have 2 check marks, etc.  Worth a shot? And the list would be reserved only for truly encounters that were “holy shit, I gotta get out of here” type. Not the “he didn’t get me off” ones. Make sense? If we can do one thing to prevent a fellow aficionado from getting hurt, or worse, we need to step up.

Glad you made it thru the true life encounter.

As for the Tom Cruise hypothetical, I’d label it risky business.

But on a more serious note, I don’t quite grasp the suggestion of tracking a provider’s negative antics and what infrastructure could manage that. Isn’t he going to be Maverick next up? Doesn’t a Tom or Maverick, etc, etc,  … by any other name by any other photo montage by any other descriptor by any other phone # by any other Xcountry greyhound coach to the next locale smell as threet?

Edited June 13, 2023 by SirBillybob

[+ KensingtonHomo]

7 minutes ago, Anthony said:

This thread is honestly why I fear so much about meeting anyone. Also, the lack of information is only exacerbating my fears. Are there really providers pulling guns out? Are all the reviews on this site exclusively from people who live in the USA? How can this be acceptable? Did the provider that had the dangerous encounters with have positive reviews? Could providers fake their reviews just to extort us for our money? I have too many questions and there's not enough info to figure it out myself   

If you look at the majority of experiences here, something like this is rare. There is always some element of risk in meeting a stranger. But if you do your homework and check reviews, get referrals on here, this is unlikely to happen. 

 

[+ FrankR]

20 minutes ago, Anthony said:

This thread is honestly why I fear so much about meeting anyone. Also, the lack of information is only exacerbating my fears. Are there really providers pulling guns out? Are all the reviews on this site exclusively from people who live in the USA? How can this be acceptable? Did the provider that had the dangerous encounters with have positive reviews? Could providers fake their reviews just to extort us for our money? I have too many questions and there's not enough info to figure it out myself   

I can see why it would be a concern for you. You previously posted that you are looking to be: Roughly used by homophobic, abusive, selfish, conservative men

Your words. So yeah, approaching those men will certainly put me on edge too. If you are fishing in a shark tank, dont be surprised when you end up tussling with a shark. For most people, who hire well reviewed gay men who enjoy the company of other gay men, it is an outlier, not the rule.

Edited June 13, 2023 by FrankR

[SirBillybob]

10 minutes ago, FrankR said:

I can see why it would be a concern for you. You previously posted that you are looking to be: Roughly used by homophobic, abusive, selfish, conservative men

Your words. So yeah, approaching those men will certainly put me on edge too. If you are fishing in a shark tank, dont be surprised when you end up tussling with a shark. For most people, who hire well reviewed gay men who enjoy the company of other gay men, it is an outlier, not the rule.

The tank example made a few of these drop.

Edited June 13, 2023 by SirBillybob

[SouthOfTheBorder]

7 minutes ago, FrankR said:

If you are fishing in a shark tank, dont be surprised when you end up tussling with a shark.

your point is well-taken & there are many clues in providers online profiles to use for vetting.  
we all have different levels of risk tolerance & mine is extremely low.  if I see any mention/references of pnp, party or anything goes, that’s an immediate NO for me.  I interpret that to mean the provider is risky with their own body and likely won’t treat mine any better.  It also tells me they have poor judgment  & likely someone I’d rather avoid.
I look for providers that have clear ground rules because it tells me they are running a business & serious about what they do.  Not somebody looking to make a quick buck who will agree to do anything

Pursuing unknown people online who will engage in an “abuse” scene is asking for trouble imo