raife

Anyone else excited about this new series from Julian Fellowes, the creator of Downton Abbey?  it's set in New York City in the 1920's or so. Starts next week, Monday January 24, I think.

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This is really thoughtful feedback.  It reminds me to give a huge shoutout of THANKS to the team who keep this site up and running, and the community who keep it thriving! 
ICTJOCK, it was just over 2 years ago that this site and this community almost perished after the loss of Daddy/Guy Fawkes (see In Memory Of... - The Company of Men).  When Daddy passed, he left no will, no succession plan, and only he had the "keys" to this site.   A committed and creative group of his (mostly straight) friends access his apartment and salvaged the code to this site, a volunteer (me) posted a gofundme to raise $11k to support transition costs, the moderators - our heroes - have given boatloads of their time to keep this community alive!  And @RadioRob is our technical ninja and genius!   It is a diverse, thoughtful and robust community.   Welcome to the community, and thanks for recognizing...and contributing to it!
@ICTJOCK

So I have been a member of this site for 3 months now.    I believe some thoughts,  ideas and feedback are in order.
 
When I first arrived here,  I wasn't sure what the site really was.   When I discovered the forums,  it really is much like the fitness site  "Realjock", where I have been a member for years.
I was intrigued and to be honest,  quite fascinated something like this even existed.    Very positive initial impression.    Now on my 3 month anniversary,  there are a few of my thoughts:
 
1.  SITE AMONG THE BEST AND WELL RUN:    My initial impression was correct.   I like the site,  most of the discussions and dialogue.   I appreciate the moderators (and approach taken).  Never have seen moderators in action before.    Some of the extras,   the "points"  the categories are kind of interesting.     I'm still waiting for my Christmas gift for all the participation....jk.
2.   MEMBERS LARGELY FRIENDLY,  OUTGOING AND ACCEPTING:    There are really good men here.   Sure,   I heard initially there would be a few exceptions  (and I've now seen that in action).   A number have reached out to me,  welcomed me and have been very supportive and friendly.    Those very few that are petty,  are largely ignored and ultimately blocked if warranted.     I'm someone who wants to learn from those you respect and appreciate.   That is by far the majority here.
3.  DIVERSE FORUM DISCUSSION:   I'm an educated professional person.   I really like being able to discuss  "shop talk"  conversation,  but also engage those who talk about legal issues,  finance and a whole host of other things,  including various parks and museums.     There are things discussed that are new to me as well.    You never know what you'll find.
This was indeed the "gem"  here.    I never would have guessed.
4:  TO THOSE WHO RUN AND MODERATE THE SITE:   Just know the larger picture.   You have provided a place for men to come and share,  to feel involved and learn.   Those who have been members for years  clearly show they have a stake in the site,  the quality of association and participation.    Friendships,  mentoring,  so many things happen here every day.   Just know I'm pleased to be associated and I look forward to gaining more insight as time goes on.   I'm an optimist by nature and generally run my life in a positive way.   This site seems to follow the same basic principles.
 
Thank you for all your work,  time and effort.   You definitely get an "A".   

A new restaurant with an interesting name opened in Brooklyn recently:

This is a little bit brilliant!

Everything looks better in porn. Reality is usually sorta "MEH". Stick with one guy you really like and have him lay on top of you. Same effect. 

That's my Boston, 39 colleges and universities, Massachusetts is the most educated state in the country 😎

You’ll have better luck with the “townies” than the univ lads, I’d imagine. Give me a young blue collar buck anyday. 

https://x.com/notanotherdick/status/1714702443609510328?s=46&t=_379SegT8UNFkn61uUkA6w
Super clever way to use Twitter to announce your availability to provide. 
Has anyone hired him?  He’s super sexy. 

I will say it again and yell it from the rooftops:  NEVER EVER give money in advance!!  (I too learned the hard way,)

Or as I have said on occasion, "I prefer my women a little taller and with broader shoulders and a bigger d*ck."

I've been to events where single gay men show up with hires as their plus one.
Nobody wants to be the sad only lonely queen at a black tie affair...so they hire someone so stunningly beautiful we all forget to pity him for being alone.
 

I agree that young people often struggle to "fit in" and respond in their failure with rebellion.
But calling yourself "queer" isn't a rebellion it's accepting your failure. Not as someone who doesn't WANT to fit in...but as someone who CAN'T.

Well, some people are proud of "not fitting in." That's another topic altogether.

It's extremeley overarching in terms of gender minorities.
In reality, the total population of men is a minority (49.5%) in the United States.
Are all American men therefore GASMs?

I think I have enough gas to be a GASM (gassy male)!

I like sexual dissident. 

Escorts have a "sell by date".
The sort of young fit and handsome men who can run a successful OnlyFans can charge whatever they want for access to their dick and ass.
30-somethings who continue to keep fit and handsome have a dwindling - but still solid following. That said;  unless you keep up that gym routine, your pricing is going to start sliding backward.
Over 40: you're losing most of your audience and you need to take on budget customers or offer more extremely kinky services.
So escorts are like cars. A few years off the lot and the price has nothing to do with inflation....its all about how pristine you maintain the chassis.
 

I have a few
1) A La Carte pricing….when it suddenly becomes obvious that the quoted price is just a base price and everything you really want is extra
2) When you get a text an hour before the session that they are running very late
3) When someone who’s been around for a while only has a few posted reviews
4) Anyone with a latex allergy

That would be awesome news... well except that it's in Florida.

I just subscribed two or three days ago for a new membership and it charged me $9.95. 🤔

Where do you come up with $240? It's $9.95 a month for a premium membership or you can do $99.95 for a 12 month membership?

Is there a reason why providers cannot move their profiles to Hunqz or another Europe-based site?  Perhaps RM operates as if it's the only viable option because nobody has challenged that characterization.

Some members write you off as a chronic complainer but I do genuinely want to see you to grow and succeed. We sympathize with you, especially other providers. I would love to see a positive post from you one day celebrating how much work you’ve got over the past 12 months explaining how making some key changes, and maybe even a move, has helped you succeed. 
A lot of clients are inconsiderate jerks and wishy washy, but that’s how the industry works. It can be better in some places compared to others, but we will always have flakes and time wasting behavior to deal with. People will lowball us, question our rates and policies. It’s human nature, and there’s no changing it. Add to that the racism component and it’s even worse. You have more years of experience than I, so you know these things even better than I do. That’s what puzzles me about the repeated posts about clients…being clients.
What we can do to cope and improve is focus on the things we can control. We don’t have to explain or justify our policies. We don’t have to get mad at the client for disagreeing with our boundaries. We don’t have to convince the client we are right or fair. We don’t have to change the client’s mind about anything. They either conform to our policies and rates for the services they want, or they don’t. When they don’t, move on.
I agree with the other comments; it’s best not to engage clients demonstrating a lack of respect for you and your work and how you choose to do business. Establish your boundaries and policies and stick to them, even if it means losing some work. That’s time saved not dealing with bad clients. When there are not enough good clients in your market, move to another one. If you can’t do that, maybe pick up some other work temporarily to help you save up for a move.
We have different views on deposits, but you have your reasons. Whatever your policies, the key is to not make exceptions to them. When you do (infrequently, for some compelling reason), make it clear to the client what it is and why you are making the exception so they don’t have the impression they can expect the same thing every time.
You might consider keeping your rates the same regardless of frequency so people don’t have any illusions about being entitled to a “regular client” rate when they only book you months or years apart. Or establish a hard line policy like they have to book you at least once per week/month/quarter or whatever so they know why they aren’t entitled.
A hot tip about that client 50 mins away: People need firm time commitments otherwise they sit and stew in impatience and uncertainty. Every minute that goes by, the more they think that you aren’t coming, or will come way later than they want or expect you to. The uncertainty is what kills them. When you commit to a time you know you can make “I will arrive by 5pm and text you when I park”. That gives the client the freedom to relax and anticipate your arrival and do other things in the meantime other than worry and second guess.