Forwarding Client Experiences to Providers

[+ KensingtonHomo]

A few weeks ago, I shared an experience where a provider injured me - unintentionally - during an encounter. Someone here either screen-grabbed it or sent the link to the provider in question. Last night, I received a multi-paragraph and fairly overwrought message from the provider saying how awful he felt, and he couldn't sleep, and could he make it up to me for free. 

Here's the problem. When it happened, I was bleeding. I told him I was bleeding and had to use his bathroom. The bleeding wasn't severe, and it's not my first time at the rodeo. Obviously, that was the end of the session, and I have no desire to see him again. 

He did not at that time offer me a free session to make up for it. Nor did he message me the next day to say he couldn't sleep.

I also didn't leave him a bad review on Rent.men because while he was too aggressive I don't think he meant to hurt me. I only shared my experience here because someone was considering him, and I wanted them to know he got too aggressive with me. So to have that sent to him sucks. 

As for his message, it feels more like public relations than sincerity. Again, didn't offer to comp a session, took his full fee, etc. And, honestly, didn't seem that broken up by it at the time. 

Thanks to whoever made me relive a bad experience and then a guilt-inducing message from the person responsible.  

[+ DrownedBoy]

Why do you feel "guilty" when you know he was BSing you?

[+ KensingtonHomo]

Oh, I should have said the message was trying to guilt me. I didn't fall for it, hence the post. 

[BuffaloKyle]

There are many providers that check out the forum as well for what is being said about them. So always assume if you post something on here about a provider do it knowing they very well may see it.

[+ KensingtonHomo]

19 minutes ago, BuffaloKyle said:

There are many providers that check out the forum as well for what is being said about them. So always assume if you post something on here about a provider do it knowing they very well may see it.

Fair enough but I think it’s bad form for a provider to contact me as this one did. I’m purposely not naming him here bc I think he’s a good provider. Not for me, but others have had good experiences, he has a lot of good reviews, and I’ve heard nice things from clients I’m friendly with. 

[ShortCutie7]

2 hours ago, BuffaloKyle said:

There are many providers that check out the forum as well for what is being said about them. So always assume if you post something on here about a provider do it knowing they very well may see it.

The provider in question 100% does follow this forum.  I personally had a fantastic time with him, but that doesn’t negate Kensington’s bad experience.  Based on my interactions with him, he probably does genuinely feel bad, though I agree messaging Kensington in an overwrought manner may not have been good form.

[+ JamesB]

4 hours ago, KensingtonHomo said:

A few weeks ago, I shared an experience where a provider injured me - unintentionally - during an encounter. Someone here either screen-grabbed it or sent the link to the provider in question. Last night, I received a multi-paragraph and fairly overwrought message from the provider saying how awful he felt, and he couldn't sleep, and could he make it up to me for free. 

Here's the problem. When it happened, I was bleeding. I told him I was bleeding and had to use his bathroom. The bleeding wasn't severe, and it's not my first time at the rodeo. Obviously, that was the end of the session, and I have no desire to see him again. 

He did not at that time offer me a free session to make up for it. Nor did he message me the next day to say he couldn't sleep.

I also didn't leave him a bad review on Rent.men because while he was too aggressive I don't think he meant to hurt me. I only shared my experience here because someone was considering him, and I wanted them to know he got too aggressive with me. So to have that sent to him sucks. 

As for his message, it feels more like public relations than sincerity. Again, didn't offer to comp a session, took his full fee, etc. And, honestly, didn't seem that broken up by it at the time. 

Thanks to whoever made me relive a bad experience and then a guilt-inducing message from the person responsible.  

 

You posted your story on a public forum, that means it was never private to begin with. Expecting that what you share here somehow stays contained is, frankly, wishful thinking at best. Once it’s out in the open, anyone can screen-grab, copy, or pass it along. That’s the nature of the internet.

If your intent was to warn others, then you have to accept that the subject of your warning might eventually hear about it. Complaining that it got back to him doesn’t make sense, it was always a possibility the moment you hit “post.” The provider reaching out is just a harmless consequence

[viewing ownly]

That's the beauty of private messages as an option. You don't have to lie or be vague about how things went - or, you can there, too. 

[soloyo215]

I think that the more it is discussed, the less public it becomes, and the bigger issue it becomes. Seems like you made your point, were responsible, recovered from the injure (presumably) and decided to keep the provider's privacy. You also discussed the issue about the apology, about the issue of the provider learning about your post about the issue with the injury. Hopefully no further issues get created from this discussion about the issue of the other issues.

[Nightowl]

New rule: Don’t forward what you see on CoM to third parties.

[+ SirBillybob]

26 minutes ago, Nightowl said:

New rule: Don’t forward what you see on CoM to third parties.

Or this … 

[Wings246]

On 9/10/2025 at 3:43 PM, KensingtonHomo said:

Last night, I received a multi-paragraph and fairly overwrought message from the provider saying how awful he felt, and he couldn't sleep, and could he make it up to me for free.

I'm not quite sure what he tried to accomplish out of this.  Would you consider retracting/modifying your statements (or completely deleting your post) after reading his message?

[Spikeguy]

His ad says he’s 6.5 so it was the technique not the size?

[+ KensingtonHomo]

13 hours ago, Wings246 said:

I'm not quite sure what he tried to accomplish out of this.  Would you consider retracting/modifying your statements (or completely deleting your post) after reading his message?

I guess. I was pretty fair. It was a single incident - I know it wasn't intentional. My discomfort stems from being pretty open with him in the moment. He apologized but didn't offer a discount or another session until it became a PR problem. 

 

11 hours ago, Spikeguy said:

His ad says he’s 6.5 so it was the technique not the size?

Definitely a technique issue. Overenthusiasm. It happens - it's happened in my personal life.