FaustOust Posted April 1 Posted April 1 (edited) Should one reasonably expect that a provider not check out Grindr while on a multi-hour, overnight, weekend, or extended appointment? There is something about it that makes me uncomfortable. I fear that he is distracted from his time with me and seeking to hook up while on my dime. Although, I don’t think I would feel the same way if he had to check email or texts. I just don’t feel that I should pay for his online cruising. Edited April 1 by FaustOust
Archangel Posted April 1 Posted April 1 I had a guy I took on vacation who was on Grindr the whole time. At one point during the vacation, I had an appointment with the resort (it was a promotional trip aimed at getting me to buy a timeshare – it worked, but different story). When I returned to the room after the appointment, there were indications that there had been an attempt to hide evidence of me and the bed had been hastily remade. I never consulted him about it, but I feel 98% certain he had a hookup while I was gone. We only met up once more after that as he had changed from the attentive escort I first met into a self-absorbed wannabe fashion businessman. italianboyph, JTtorretto and FaustOust 2 1
Archangel Posted April 1 Posted April 1 To your point, no—they shouldn’t be on Grindr. I do understand answering messages about upcoming appointments, but that’s work. While with you, you should be the primary focus unless something else is arranged in advance. jackcali and italianboyph 2
Aaron 90 Posted April 1 Posted April 1 This is so insulting. It's a distraction that takes away from the experience you're buying. + Pensant, jackcali and + ApexNomad 1 2
+ ApexNomad Posted April 1 Posted April 1 14 minutes ago, FaustOust said: Should one reasonably expect that a provider not check out Grindr while on a multi-hour, overnight, weekend, or extended appointment? There is something about it that makes me uncomfortable. I fear that he is distracted from his time with me and seeking to hook up while on my dime. Although, I don’t think I would feel the same way if he had to check email or texts. I just don’t feel that I should pay for his online cruising. You should have their undivided attention the entire time you are paying them. Period!
+ Jamie21 Posted April 1 Posted April 1 But if he shares his Grindr cruising with you that’s a different thing. I had a client who liked me to go on Grindr while I was with him. I’d show him the messages, ask him to help me reply, and scroll through guys with him discussing who we liked and why. If there was someone we both liked he’d ask me to message them to see if they wanted to join us. Of course because it was Grindr the guys we messaged were never available now (always some excuse….) and tbh I think if we did get someone to agree to visit my client would have panicked!! However it was a fun diversion between our play and he enjoyed the vicarious experience of being me on Grindr and directing my replies and who I should message. + Pensant, 56harrisond, jackcali and 3 others 3 3
BrickBuilder Posted April 1 Posted April 1 This is relevant even for shorter 1-2 hour meetings, the phone needs to be put aside and / or you need to discuss its use. They should not be texting or arranging other hookups unless previously agreed. They should not be taking pictures or videos or doing any audio recording. Notifications should be off (i.e. beeping and ringing). And for god's sake, do NOT set an alarm for 45/50/60/90/120 minutes to remind me that our time is nearly over. I know how to time my encounter...there is typically a clock somewhere. Also, I do not want to watch porn on your phone....your bad quality home videos or what you downloaded. I do the same with my phone during an appointment that I ask the provider to do. On silent face down on the nightstand or in a pocket. The first caveat to my rules are using a phone or tablet for background music. The second caveat to this is checking in with a third party before and after an appointment. I do this if I am not hosting and I do not mind the provider doing it if I am hosting. I try to send the text before I even walk into the individual's place (typically I send a picture of the door/room number/etc that is identifiable) - safety first fun second. Aaron 90 and NYXboy 1 1
Solution italianboyph Posted April 1 Solution Posted April 1 13 hours ago, FaustOust said: Should one reasonably expect that a provider not check out Grindr while on a multi-hour, overnight, weekend, or extended appointment? There is something about it that makes me uncomfortable. I fear that he is distracted from his time with me and seeking to hook up while on my dime. Although, I don’t think I would feel the same way if he had to check email or texts. I just don’t feel that I should pay for his online cruising. A provider should never been on the apps while with you. Especially if you're taking the time to have them on vacation with you. Time and a place for everything MikeBiDude, + ApexNomad and FaustOust 2 1
Nightowl Posted April 1 Posted April 1 IMHO, if you are paying for someone’s time, they should be devoting 100% of that time to whatever it is you hired them for. If I discovered that a guy I had hired was on Grindr on *my* time I’d shove his ass out the door and refuse to pay him. Aaron 90 and MscleLovr 2
soloyo215 Posted April 1 Posted April 1 18 hours ago, FaustOust said: Should one reasonably expect that a provider not check out Grindr while on a multi-hour, overnight, weekend, or extended appointment? There is something about it that makes me uncomfortable. I fear that he is distracted from his time with me and seeking to hook up while on my dime. Although, I don’t think I would feel the same way if he had to check email or texts. I just don’t feel that I should pay for his online cruising. I agree with the others, it's disrespectful, unprofessional and insulting. You pay for their time. If they have to look at some app for something routine checking, I'll be fine with that. But to try to hook up while with me, no. Aaron 90 1
Mo Mason Posted April 6 Posted April 6 Yes, one should reasonably expect this but, as some of you know, I am not normal. lol I often explicitly request to be ignored during sessions. I'm self-conscious and don't like to be watched while I'm worshiping a guy's body, feet, ass, cock.. what ever. It plays into that dom/sub scene I so enjoy. So I always let him know that he is totally welcome to play on his phone, close his eyes, watch tv, etc. As long as his attention is not on me and what I'm doing... he could fall asleep for the whole session for all I care. But I'm kind of odd, paying men to ignore me. I know this. I also eat peanut butter on my hamburgers. BenjaminNYC 1
Guest Posted April 6 Posted April 6 I once had a provider leave in the middle of our session to meet a Grindr hookup down the street. When he returned, I helped clean him up. Ultimately, I understand that not all guys can get off on being serviced. Also, he didn't charge me the overnight rate.
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