Clients don’t know their schedule?!

[+ nycman]

 

And the beat goes on……

[Vin Marco]

30 minutes ago, TallMuscl37 said:

However, when you use words like “kryptonite” to imply a person is harming themselves simply by having boundaries: that’s a bit problematic. 

No, no, no,  no, wrong, wrong, wrong.... I'm almost certain just about everyone here except you would perceive what I said ( kryptonite ) as a barricade to landing a client  ( "consultation fee's" and deposits ) but more importantly I was quoting "Ethan Woods" not you..... 🧐 

Not only is COM a test market where sound and sage advice  has been given, it's an actual market that you're alienating yourself from. It was just mentioned to you not long ago.  Many solutions to your issues  have been provided but sometimes we see only what we want to see and sometimes getting out of our own way is our biggest obstacle.  
I'm exhausted from reading what I consider to be insanity ( doing the same thing and expecting a different result  ) for that reason: 

[TallMuscl37]

37 minutes ago, Vin Marco said:

No, no, no,  no, wrong, wrong, wrong.... I'm almost certain just about everyone here except you would perceive what I said ( kryptonite ) as a barricade to landing a client  ( "consultation fee's" and deposits ) but more importantly I was quoting "Ethan Woods" not you..... 🧐 

 

I don’t see anywhere here, where @Ethan Woods said anything about a deposit or consultation fee. So I took it as if you were directing that towards me. If you can show me where he said that, by all means my apologies. 
 

As far as the other stuff; the clients here who have met me in person: are aware I’m a good person. I’m not going to feed into everyone’s advice, because I can read between the lines on some things when it comes across as shady. Someone telling me I’m “shooting myself in the foot”, or similar verbiage just because I have a different way of working and filters: is insulting to say the least.

Maybe “harming oneself” wasn’t what you were implying, but when I actually look at the 2nd definition of Kryptonite:

 

 

I understand you come from a position of privilege: you’re a hot White-looking (but I’m aware you’re Latin heritage so that’s not trying to deny that by any means) guy who happens to be on a forum where other guys mostly only talk about hot White guys. I am alienated by default, why do you think there’s not a whole lot of people of color who post here?
 

You may never understand my point of view, because it’s not you. I’m not mad, but I won’t stop speaking my truth or be gaslighted on my experiences by anyone. I don’t give a F how successful another escort is or how slow it may be for me; I’ve learned from my own experience what I need to do to maintain my time and peace in this industry. And deposits and consultation fees are one of them. They are not Kryptonite in any shape or “form”:

And just today, a regular who hasn’t seen me in awhile sent me a deposit:

 

 

It would be insanity, to go back to the way I used to work. Trusting that all clients are well intentioned, and then being stood up. If you want me to go back to that way of working, please be my first choice of contact whenever I fill my tank or book a hotel, and have a bunch of clients not show up. 

Edited November 24, 2024 by TallMuscl37

[Vin Marco]

29 minutes ago, TallMuscl37 said:

I understand you come from a position of privilege: you’re a hot White-looking guy who happens to be on a forum where other guys mostly only talk mainly about hot White looking guys. I am alienated by default, why do you think there’s not a whole lot of people of color who post here?

I didn't say anything malicious to you, nothing to offend you. Scroll up to Simon's post where he quotes "Ethan Woods"  

I asked you many months ago to never speak to me about privilege, you forget I'm an IMMIGRANT from MEXICO 🇲🇽 who didn't learn to speak English until I was 5 years old ... I was raised part of my childhood by a Sāmoan family... I grew up being called beaner and wetback ( that's not exactly a privilege ) Nobody will EVER hear me moan about my experience with racism though. In fact, you or anyone else will never hear me moan and complain about anything here. 
 

Edited November 24, 2024 by Vin Marco

[Simon Suraci]

“It’s not like I was trying to hide or cover anything up, otherwise I would have taken down my signature already.”

I was referring to Ethan Woods’ signature. I am wondering what Ethan has to hide.

“I have the option to change my screenname if I want to, for whatever reason I want to.” 

Yes, you do. Nothing wrong with that. It was confusing reading threads with your previous screen name. I figured it would help others that were similarly confused.

“And who are you calling a sneaky little fucker?”

Ethan Woods. That’s who I am calling a sneaky little focker. Unless you and he are the same person. Ethan Woods and other new posters in the past tend to agree with you and have similar writing styles. You’re not pulling the wool over very many eyes.

“You need to check yourself because, because you’re going to end up on the wrong side of me: and that’s the bad side you don’t want to get on. So don’t even try it, Mister.”

Jarrod, there is no right side of you. You’re toxic. Creating new profiles just to get someone to agree with your ideas is desperate behavior. You’re only digging a deeper hole for yourself.

“If you don’t like what I have to say here, go on about your business. I’m not here to have squabbles with other escorts. I was not addressing you anywhere here, so don’t try to bait me into a conflict that’s not needed. You’ve already did it once in another one of my threads, so please…do you.”

I am doing me. You’re doing Ethan Woods. I thought members should know.

[mike carey]

I'm fairly sure Ethan Woods is a different person, not an alter ego of Jarrod. The language registers they use are fundamentally different for a start. I would go so far as to say incompatible.

[TallMuscl37]

3 hours ago, Vin Marco said:

I didn't say anything malicious to you, nothing to offend you. Scroll up to Simon's post where he quotes "Ethan Woods"  

I asked you many months ago to never speak to me about privilege, you forget I'm an IMMIGRANT from MEXICO 🇲🇽 who didn't learn to speak English until I was 5 years old ... I was raised part of my childhood by a Sāmoan family... I grew up being called beaner and wetback ( that's not exactly a privilege ) Nobody will EVER hear me moan about my experience with racism though. In fact, you or anyone else will never hear me moan and complain about anything here. 
 

I get your point and sorry if I referred you as White&privileged: again I’m not minimizing your heritage, background or hurdles you faced. However; I have still seen first hand how even those of Latino backgrounds are treated more favorly by wealthy White types. I’ve seen it Texas, where you reside: the White guys will gladly be seen taking a group of their Mexican employees to lunch. But yet, it’s hard enough even to be seen or considered for a “dinner date” as a Black escort and get paid the “weekends and overnight rates” that are discussed on here. I knew a guy years ago, a friend of mine in Miami: he was Brazilian/Portuguese. But he was passable as a White guy, and in Miami: whether you’re Cuban or Colombian, to them White is, anything not BLACK. 

 

One day, my friend introduced me to this filthy; and filthy rich White guy in Miami who had a home on star island. Son of a Texas oil tycoon. It was “sugar daddy” who he was getting money from, and didn’t even have to put out for. Can you believe, the first day I met him over Thanksgiving dinner, the rich guy and his White friends had the audacity to throw out a racist Black joke to me? How inappropriate. I don’t even remember what it was, but it was immature and not appropriate. So it goes to show, even if you’re not White, you can still be indirectly benefiting from the privilege of being “close enough”. Or as they say in the transsexual community: passable.
 

You say you understand marginalization, which I’m sure you do. But I’d like to see more understanding from you (and others on the forum) about what someone has to do to LESSEN being marginalized. We can start by not poking fun at someone’s protective booking process.

And regarding the quote you made: I have a screenshot showing exactly who Ethan Woods was talking to: 

He was quoting me in that answer. That’s why I responded how I did. How does any of this relate to what I’m discussing? Because those are issues as it relates to the topic, of what each individual escorts have to deal with. You may have been called this and that AS A YOUNGSTER: But I’m talking about shit that I’m still dealing with NOW. And poking jabs at deposits and what not, it’s just not cool. And if you still wonder why I have to do it: just look at the latest text I got the other day 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

Edited November 25, 2024 by TallMuscl37

[TallMuscl37]

10 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

“It’s not like I was trying to hide or cover anything up, otherwise I would have taken down my signature already.”

I was referring to Ethan Woods’ signature. I am wondering what Ethan has to hide.

“I have the option to change my screenname if I want to, for whatever reason I want to.” 

Yes, you do. Nothing wrong with that. It was confusing reading threads with your previous screen name. I figured it would help others that were similarly confused.

“And who are you calling a sneaky little fucker?”

Ethan Woods. That’s who I am calling a sneaky little focker. Unless you and he are the same person. Ethan Woods and other new posters in the past tend to agree with you and have similar writing styles. You’re not pulling the wool over very many eyes.

“You need to check yourself because, because you’re going to end up on the wrong side of me: and that’s the bad side you don’t want to get on. So don’t even try it, Mister.”

Jarrod, there is no right side of you. You’re toxic. Creating new profiles just to get someone to agree with your ideas is desperate behavior. You’re only digging a deeper hole for yourself.

“If you don’t like what I have to say here, go on about your business. I’m not here to have squabbles with other escorts. I was not addressing you anywhere here, so don’t try to bait me into a conflict that’s not needed. You’ve already did it once in another one of my threads, so please…do you.”

I am doing me. You’re doing Ethan Woods. I thought members should know.

Gurl, you are f-ing delusional. Toxic? Really…what’s toxic is you having assumptive paranoia and assuming I have more than one profile. Why would I name myself Ethan Woods? That’s a whole name. Maybe he has a profile somewhere. I simply changed my handle to the same name I started using for personal hookups. I reserve the right to also not use the same name I’m using in my ads. It’s not like my name changed entirely from every single post.

Stop smoking that Cali reefer, and pull your head out of your ass. I am not the one…get out of here 🚪 

And don’t lie and say you were quoting Ethan woods. You made a statement about me changing my handle, and directly put a gif about being a sneaky “focker”. Don’t get caught in a lie. 

Edited November 25, 2024 by TallMuscl37

[MikeBiDude]

Moderator note: let’s return to topic: “clients knowing their schedule…” and stop back/forth sniping.

[Moke]

I want to know what a “consultation fee” is too. 

[pubic_assistance]

On 11/23/2024 at 5:15 PM, SometimesBi said:

But, the female partner cannot provide the anal (and prostate) stimulation in the way that the man enjoys. And sorry, no, a strap-on is not the same. So don't go there. 

You obviously don't understand what "cheating"means to bisexuals.

Many modern couples allow extracurricular sexual activity by simply being HONEST about it. Couples where one or both are bisexual have a long history of this understanding between them.

 

Edited November 25, 2024 by pubic_assistance
grammar / understanding

[TallMuscl37]

2 hours ago, Moke said:

I want to know what a “consultation fee” is too. 

Consultation Fee Understanding the Importance of Consultation Fees in Professional Services - FasterCapital

FASTERCAPITAL.COM

---

1. <strong>Economic Valuation and Perception:</strong> - Consultation fees serve as a tangible expression of...

“Remember, it's not just about the money—it's about the value exchanged and the impact created.”

 

Edited November 25, 2024 by TallMuscl37

[+ José Soplanucas]

3 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

You obviously don't understand what "cheating"means to bisexuals.

Many modern couples allow extracurricular sexual activity by simply being HONEST about it. Couples where one or both are bisexual have a long history of this understanding between them.

 

I doubt this is a bisexual thing. Bisexual or heterosexual couples should base their contract in honesty.

[Monarchy79]

On 11/21/2024 at 6:36 PM, pubic_assistance said:

That client needs to STOP cheating on his partner.

You’re absolutely right. 

Unfortunately , this is when being “right”, means very little. 

Most of the topics discussed in these forums slide into the grey area of “righteousness”, or the lack thereof. 

I’m certain many clients are cheating on their partners or  crossing some boundary of “rules” in their relationship. 

Dishonesty is one of the “underbellies” of human nature which is so powerful that neither religion or government can control it. 
 

[ICTJOCK]

I suppose it would be helpful if clients  provided clarity.    I get that outside of the escorting business.    It may be a way of saying that they want to do it and don't want you to tell them...no,  so they try and make it what seems easier.

I'd provide them a couple of time options and if it doesn't work,  ask,  "then what works for you".     Being wishy washy isn't helpful, even if their objective is to be that.    Human nature I suppose.

[Simon Suraci]

I said my peace. I’ll move on, back to the topic at hand.

As @ReynST mentioned, a booking system helps a lot for incall massages. It’s really easy for clients to view my availability and book their own appointments whenever they want. They can do it in the middle of the night when I wouldn’t be responding to texts. Everything is automated, so the client gets the info they need and I get a notification. I send a quick confirmation message too whenever I have a free moment and that’s that. Easy.

With my booking system, clients don’t have to text me every time if they don’t want to, but by and large texting is still the most popular way for new and existing clients to book appointments. Regulars already know me, so they aren’t asking a bunch of the typical new client questions about services, cost, and location. Since all they need to know is my availability, the booking system is convenient for them. Most regulars still text though. Booking systems are underrated and underused.

Where booking systems tend to fall short:

1. Outcall appointments. The client really needs to tell me where and when they want their massage for me to estimate travel time, factoring in traffic and appropriate padding time on the front and back ends. Clients do not want to plug in so much specific information. My app is not sophisticated enough yet to do this for me either. Sometimes I make a judgement call based on distance and where I will be for work or personal life before and after their proposed appointment. For example, doing an outcall on my way home or on my way to work vs a far-flung outcall in the middle of the day that would put me in bad traffic on the way back to the studio. 

2. Escort services. The client doesn’t know what I have going on, so on paper it may look like I am available at such-and-such a time, but I may not be able to fulfill all of their requests without some kind of communication first. I would need some specifics to be able to prepare, like maybe I need to bring toys or gear, or prep to bottom, or make sure I am optimally ready to top. Maybe I have another client after them that would not be a good idea to do back-to-back. Lots of reasons. Text seems to still be best for escort services, although I will still book it in my system after the fact.

3. Last minute requests. Sometimes I am at the studio available to take a client right away. Other times I may be at home, at the gym, fulfilling an outcall, or other. The client will see availability two hours ahead of whatever time they are viewing their screen. That gives them the chance to book automatically while giving me sufficient notice to get from wherever I am back to the studio and prep the space before they arrive. This wouldn’t work for the client requesting something within the hour. In that case, text is best, but no guarantees I can respond. I might be working or otherwise unable to text back right away.

 

There is no perfect system for every provider or every client. Booking systems are a great underused tool though. They make life so much easier for everyone when clients use them. Take advantage of whatever tools you can to streamline your process. If you primarily do incall massages, I highly recommend investing in a booking system.

Edited November 25, 2024 by Simon Suraci

[+ José Soplanucas]

6 hours ago, José Soplanucas said:

I doubt this is a bisexual thing. Bisexual or heterosexual couples should base their contract in honesty.

Oooops, and I forgot homosexuals! 

[Ali Gator]

I don't think some of the providers are using 'consultation fees' correctly. What exactly are they 'consulting' the potential client about ? Answering simple questions about the service one provides is not consulting. 

I know many professionals in the service industry offer consultations for their services (and the consultation is usually to determine whether you need their specialty service or not), and those consultations are (for the most part) free.

The professional (re: lawyer, surgeon, dentist, hairstylist, financial investor, mechanic, caterer, dress designer, home remodeler, tutor, etc.) will sit down with the potential client and consult the client on their specific need, what the client's goal is, what the professional can offer to reach that goal (if anything), what the process will involve, what the time frame looks like, and what the hourly fee / final cost will be. The client / professional then usually will reach a decision at the end of the consultation on whether they should move further (and sign an agreement with everything they discussed detailed), or they decide the professional's service is not needed. This is usually less than an hour, and done as a courtesy by the professional. 

If I should call a lawyer and ask whether he practices real estate law, how much he charges per hour, where he's located, etc. and he answers those questions, that's not considered a 'consultation'. That's called answering questions about his business, and also done for free. 

 

[TallMuscl37]

1 hour ago, Ali Gator said:

I don't think some of the providers are using 'consultation fees' correctly. What exactly are they 'consulting' the potential client about ?

If I should call a lawyer and ask whether he practices real estate law, how much he charges per hour, where he's located, etc. and he answers those questions, that's not considered a 'consultation'. That's called answering questions about his business, and also done for free. 

 

But here’s the difference: the person who usually answers those questions: is often a paralegal. You’ll find many law firms do not have direct contact to the lawyer (though some do and I have had to make my calls before…and sometimes they do a free short consultation).

Now, setting aside COMPARISONS (the thief of joy) (link), what sets many escorts apart from lawyers is: our dick are visible, are pics are visible, our height/age and top/btm status are usually visible (barring RentMasseur…but that’s simply the “training wheels” of escort seeking 🤣 

We also have a map function WHICH I already discussed in another thread (link) So that takes the guess work out of A LOT of things already. Then add reviews, ad writing copy (which some potential clients seem to not want to read, idk why)…the person often has more than enough to go off of.

Like I have said before and recently: I been doing this since 2008. I’ve done no deposits. No consultations. Some clients don’t just want a few inches, they want the whole damn hog 🐷 

In my case, I can’t always tell the difference between them and serious clients: without actually doing a what? CONSULTATION. Brilliant right? Now, the client is welcome to skip the consultation and get to the deposit. The only “free” consultation I offer is the 2 or 3 texts I send asking:

Name/Age:

City You’re In:

Host or Travel:

Availability:

Are You Top/Bottom (optional):

-then I’ll send a 2nd message:

Have you viewed my website www.XXX… for price and details?

Thats all the chat I feel is necessary. I may occasionally discuss things like what payment method to do for the consultation/depost, what time, what’s better between host or travel, or if I’m not in the area yet: I’ll let them know ahead that I’m pre-advertising in the area prior to coming. But that I’m taking consultations and deposits now.  Anything else regarding planning a time, explicit talk, etc etc: that’s all consultations.

 

And the biggest thing is: some people don’t realize the average client text back and forth can take anywhere from an hour to 4 hours. I’ve literally counted the time of their first text, to the time they say, “maybe next time”. That can take an entire afternoon. Between the breaks in texting, it can add up. Multiply that by multiple texts, that can add up to DAYS worth of texting. And I’ve seen myself only get 1 client out of all that work, not getting paid zip by the others. 
 

Of course: it’s not for everybody. I’m not trying to tell people what they should or shouldn’t do. I’m just talking about ME. And I hope that others can appreciate that I can make my own decisions about what I feel works for me, even if it doesn’t work or not required for THEM. 
 

And like I said earlier and will say again: Not every inquiry is “just asking questions”. Even if the client says he is ass dead serious: There’s an escort who may be at the movies, visiting his dying grandmother, laser focused on his gym workout, or driving 500 miles to the next city. All that means taking time out to respond to someone, who might not even end up booking.

It would be different if RentMen was paying us just to post, but they aren’t. We’re paying them, and clients are coming to US. Not the other way around. We reserve the right to run things however we wish, long as it’s not scamming or taking advantage or catfishing anybody.

Edited November 26, 2024 by TallMuscl37

[+ ApexNomad]

1 hour ago, TallMuscl37 said:

But here’s the difference: the person who usually answers those questions: is often a paralegal. You’ll find many law firms do not have direct contact to the lawyer (though some do and I have had to make my calls before…and sometimes they do a free short consultation).

Now, setting aside COMPARISONS (the thief of joy) (link), what sets many escorts apart from lawyers is: our dick are visible, are pics are visible, our height/age and top/btm status are usually visible (barring RentMasseur…but that’s simply the “training wheels” of escort seeking 🤣 

We also have a map function WHICH I already discussed in another thread (link) So that takes the guess work out of A LOT of things already. Then add reviews, ad writing copy (which some potential clients seem to not want to read, idk why)…the person often has more than enough to go off of.

Like I have said before and recently: I been doing this since 2008. I’ve done no deposits. No consultations. Some clients don’t just want a few inches, they want the whole damn hog 🐷 

In my case, I can’t always tell the difference between them and serious clients: without actually doing a what? CONSULTATION. Brilliant right? Now, the client is welcome to skip the consultation and get to the deposit. The only “free” consultation I offer is the 2 or 3 texts I send asking:

Name/Age:

City You’re In:

Host or Travel:

Availability:

Are You Top/Bottom (optional):

-then I’ll send a 2nd message:

Have you viewed my website www.XXX… for price and details?

Thats all the chat I feel is necessary. I may occasionally discuss things like what payment method to do for the consultation/depost, what time, what’s better between host or travel, or if I’m not in the area yet: I’ll let them know ahead that I’m pre-advertising in the area prior to coming. But that I’m taking consultations and deposits now.  Anything else regarding planning a time, explicit talk, etc etc: that’s all consultations.

 

And the biggest thing is: some people don’t realize the average client text back and forth can take anywhere from an hour to 4 hours. I’ve literally counted the time of their first text, to the time they say, “maybe next time”. That can take an entire afternoon. Between the breaks in texting, it can add up. Multiply that by multiple texts, that can add up to DAYS worth of texting. And I’ve seen myself only get 1 client out of all that work, not getting paid zip by the others. 
 

Of course: it’s not for everybody. I’m not trying to tell people what they should or shouldn’t do. I’m just talking about ME. And I hope that others can appreciate that I can make my own decisions about what I feel works for me, even if it doesn’t work or not required for THEM. 
 

And like I said earlier and will say again: Not every inquiry is “just asking questions”. Even if the client says he is ass dead serious: There’s an escort who may be at the movies, visiting his dying grandmother, laser focused on his gym workout, or driving 500 miles to the next city. All that means taking time out to respond to someone, who might not even end up booking.

It would be different if RentMen was paying us just to post, but they aren’t. We’re paying them, and clients are coming to US. Not the other way around. We reserve the right to run things however we wish, long as it’s not scamming or taking advantage or catfishing anybody.

Having spent over 25 years as an equity partner at an Am Law 100 firm, 14 of which I served as head of my practice group, before transitioning into private consultation, I can assure you that I personally handled consultations—free of charge—and never delegated such matters to paralegals.

The General Counsel of a Fortune 500 company, when considering a law firm for high-stakes legal matters, is not going to reach out to a paralegal. They need to speak directly with someone who can grasp their business needs, navigate complex legal issues, and offer actionable advice. I was the one clients like the General Counsel would contact - by phone, by e-mail, and in-person. They sought my expertise, not that of a paralegal or first-year or mid-level associate, for that critical first conversation.

No, my “dick” isn’t visible, but what is visible is my extensive CV and bio, showcasing my role as head of my practice group, and they reached out to me directly, trusting my expertise. It outlined my credentials: the schools I graduated from, the bars and jurisdictions I’m admitted to practice in, articles I’ve written, conferences I’ve lectured at, my pro bono work—qualities that encouraged clients to contact me personally, ensuring they received the highest level of service.

My map? That’s my office locations, where clients can easily find me. As for reviews, I’m proud to be ranked on respected platforms like Martindale-Hubbell, Super Lawyers, Who’s Who Legal, Legal 500, and AVVO. These rankings reflect my reputation in the legal community. 

I can relate to the time and effort involved in inquiries that don’t lead anywhere. The hours spent crafting a pitch and presentation to secure representation are far from trivial. I’ve spent days, even weeks, preparing tailored presentations and pitching to potential clients, only to find that after all that effort, the client either chooses another firm or, in some cases, has already made their decision before we even had the chance to present.

It’s the same level of commitment, research, and time investment. In this line of work, it’s about building long-term relationships, not just securing one-time transactions. And yet, despite all that effort, sometimes we don’t even get the opportunity to pitch before the client has made their decision. It’s frustrating, but it’s part of the process, and that effort often pays off when we land the right client.

I respect and appreciate the decisions you’ve made that work best for you. I think it’s important to recognize that what works for one may not necessarily be applicable for all. Being open to feedback and considering a range of perspectives can offer valuable insights that lead to broader success. My advice? Seek trusted counsel from close friends and fellow providers—offline. I wish you much success.

[mike carey]

But none of that is relevant because ... reasons.

[TallMuscl37]

6 hours ago, ApexNomad said:

Having spent over 25 years as an equity partner at an Am Law 100 firm, 14 of which I served as head of my practice group, before transitioning into private consultation, I can assure you that I personally handled consultations—free of charge—and never delegated such matters to paralegals.

The General Counsel of a Fortune 500 company, when considering a law firm for high-stakes legal matters, is not going to reach out to a paralegal. They need to speak directly with someone who can grasp their business needs, navigate complex legal issues, and offer actionable advice. I was the one clients like the General Counsel would contact - by phone, by e-mail, and in-person. They sought my expertise, not that of a paralegal or first-year or mid-level associate, for that critical first conversation.

No, my “dick” isn’t visible, but what is visible is my extensive CV and bio, showcasing my role as head of my practice group, and they reached out to me directly, trusting my expertise. It outlined my credentials: the schools I graduated from, the bars and jurisdictions I’m admitted to practice in, articles I’ve written, conferences I’ve lectured at, my pro bono work—qualities that encouraged clients to contact me personally, ensuring they received the highest level of service.

My map? That’s my office locations, where clients can easily find me. As for reviews, I’m proud to be ranked on respected platforms like Martindale-Hubbell, Super Lawyers, Who’s Who Legal, Legal 500, and AVVO. These rankings reflect my reputation in the legal community. 

I can relate to the time and effort involved in inquiries that don’t lead anywhere. The hours spent crafting a pitch and presentation to secure representation are far from trivial. I’ve spent days, even weeks, preparing tailored presentations and pitching to potential clients, only to find that after all that effort, the client either chooses another firm or, in some cases, has already made their decision before we even had the chance to present.

It’s the same level of commitment, research, and time investment. In this line of work, it’s about building long-term relationships, not just securing one-time transactions. And yet, despite all that effort, sometimes we don’t even get the opportunity to pitch before the client has made their decision. It’s frustrating, but it’s part of the process, and that effort often pays off when we land the right client.

I respect and appreciate the decisions you’ve made that work best for you. I think it’s important to recognize that what works for one may not necessarily be applicable for all. Being open to feedback and considering a range of perspectives can offer valuable insights that lead to broader success. My advice? Seek trusted counsel from close friends and fellow providers—offline. I wish you much success.

Thankyou very much. I appreciate your story. However, the life of a sex worker advertising online, is still going to be more complex and individualized than most other industries. I don’t want to be compared to a lawyer, and it would be a long shot to try and piece together tidbits of how escorts and lawyers are “relatable”.
 

A consultation is a consultation: and I’m really not interested in weighing it against other industries or businesses. ESPECIALLY when: we’re still fighting for and clinging on to: social acceptance. Legality. decriminalization. Fair pay. All the other things other industries have pressed and worked hard for. I’ve more than once have suggested RentMen advertisers to go on strike…and I will continue to suggest that, though in ways that may be different than what most people view as a strike. A “strike” could be anything from removing a phone number, to refusing to do anything under $XXX dollars and turning down clients who won’t. 

That said: when it comes to advice, honestly I’m tired of advice. Tired and fatigued. Everybody has advice, but you know what they don’t have? Money to give. People are eager to give advice, but slow to actually offer up some real money to repair someone’s circumstances. I already know what the missing link is, and what could fix it. Sex work and advertising takes savvy: but it’s not rocket science. I started off in the industry, with nothing but a gay.com profile and a lap top web cam picture. I had a car and a little efficiency studio: and it worked.
 

However since then, two things changed: more guys entered the industry and my prices became more firm. I could probably get clients left and right, if I was charging $50 and $100. Because a lot of these guys on hookup apps, which make up the largest number of where no strings/anonymous sex is taking place at: are willing to pay that. I even do it from time to time (spoiler alert). Sometimes, I may be “up” but am not in the position for a freebie hookup: so I’ll offer a meet on “clearance” 🤣 It’s usually a last resort when things are quiet but, there’s been a few times this year that I had to do what I had to do to get by. Sometimes RentMen and Masseur has nobody booking for days on end. 

But who wants to only charge $50 and $100 ALL the time, and burn out their body while probably still not having enough to survive? Not to mention (as it relates to scheduling), I don’t like the constant being available and in sex mode all the time. Using hookup apps for sex work ventures is essentially that. I prefer to schedule ahead nowadays.

When someone is willing to offer to pay some of my bills, or put me in a place to live: then I’ll lend an ear to their advice. But until then, it’s all OPINIONS. And what’s funny is: the people who have actually done that, tend to be the ones offering the least advice. It’s the ones who have the most advice, that are willing to do the least gestures.
 

Reminds me of client earlier this year who got an attitude when I didn’t take his advice (I edited his face with a frog, because that what he is). I never wanted to kick someone’s ass more in my life. The old me, from 15 years ago…would have. Nowadays, I have compassion 🤭 And this is a client who previously booked me. Goes back to that article I posted about “the irony” in another thread (which is now closed) 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

 

BTW: after that last message I did end up blocking him also. But I just wanted to leave him unblocked because I know he would come back around…and I’d laugh myself so hard 🤣 it’s funny how iPhone lets you block people, but then doesn’t remind you that you did 🤦🏾‍♂️ they need to have an update that shows “you cannot message this number, it’s in your blocked contacts list”.

Edited November 26, 2024 by TallMuscl37

[+ ApexNomad]

3 hours ago, TallMuscl37 said:

Thankyou very much. I appreciate your story. However, the life of a sex worker advertising online, is still going to be more complex and individualized than most other industries. I don’t want to be compared to a lawyer, and it would be a long shot to try and piece together tidbits of how escorts and lawyers are “relatable”.
 

A consultation is a consultation: and I’m really not interested in weighing it against other industries or businesses. ESPECIALLY when: we’re still fighting for and clinging on to: social acceptance. Legality. decriminalization. Fair pay. All the other things other industries have pressed and worked hard for. I’ve more than once have suggested RentMen advertisers to go on strike…and I will continue to suggest that, though in ways that may be different than what most people view as a strike. A “strike” could be anything from removing a phone number, to refusing to do anything under $XXX dollars and turning down clients who won’t. 

That said: when it comes to advice, honestly I’m tired of advice. Tired and fatigued. Everybody has advice, but you know what they don’t have? Money to give. People are eager to give advice, but slow to actually offer up some real money to repair someone’s circumstances. I already know what the missing link is, and what could fix it. Sex work and advertising takes savvy: but it’s not rocket science. I started off in the industry, with nothing but a gay.com profile and a lap top web cam picture. I had a car and a little efficiency studio: and it worked.
 

However since then, two things changed: more guys entered the industry and my prices became more firm. I could probably get clients left and right, if I was charging $50 and $100. Because a lot of these guys on hookup apps, which make up the largest number of where no strings/anonymous sex is taking place at: are willing to pay that. I even do it from time to time (spoiler alert). Sometimes, I may be “up” but am not in the position for a freebie hookup: so I’ll offer a meet on “clearance” 🤣 It’s usually a last resort when things are quiet but, there’s been a few times this year that I had to do what I had to do to get by. Sometimes RentMen and Masseur has nobody booking for days on end. 

But who wants to only charge $50 and $100 ALL the time, and burn out their body while probably still not having enough to survive? Not to mention (as it relates to scheduling), I don’t like the constant being available and in sex mode all the time. Using hookup apps for sex work ventures is essentially that. I prefer to schedule ahead nowadays.

When someone is willing to offer to pay some of my bills, or put me in a place to live: then I’ll lend an ear to their advice. But until then, it’s all OPINIONS. And what’s funny is: the people who have actually done that, tend to be the ones offering the least advice. It’s the ones who have the most advice, that are willing to do the least gestures.
 

Reminds me of client earlier this year who got an attitude when I didn’t take his advice (I edited his face with a frog, because that what he is). I never wanted to kick someone’s ass more in my life. The old me, from 15 years ago…would have. Nowadays, I have compassion 🤭 And this is a client who previously booked me. Goes back to that article I posted about “the irony” in another thread (which is now closed) 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

 

BTW: after that last message I did end up blocking him also. But I just wanted to leave him unblocked because I know he would come back around…and I’d laugh myself so hard 🤣 it’s funny how iPhone lets you block people, but then doesn’t remind you that you did 🤦🏾‍♂️ they need to have an update that shows “you cannot message this number, it’s in your blocked contacts list”.

I hear what you’re saying about valuing gestures of real support over just words, and I get how that sentiment comes from lived experiences where advice might have felt empty or unhelpful. But I’d like to offer a different perspective on this idea.

Sometimes, it’s precisely when we feel like others can’t directly solve our problems—or when their support doesn’t come in tangible forms like paying bills—that we need to lean into the advice being offered. Not all advice is created equal, of course, but dismissing it based on whether someone’s materially invested in your life could mean missing out on insights that might resonate or help.

We don’t always get the messages we need in the ways we want to hear them. Sometimes, those who can’t walk in your shoes still see a path you might not have noticed yet. And it’s not about someone thinking they know better—it’s about caring enough to offer a perspective you can consider, reject, or adapt to your reality.

Advice doesn’t have to come from someone who pays your bills to be valuable. Often, it’s the people who can’t “do” much for us who end up saying exactly what we need to hear. Consider moving some of your frustrations offline, away from a group that’s mostly made up of clients. I offer my thoughts in that spirit—with respect for your experience and a belief in your ability to keep thriving.

[Ali Gator]

Quote

A consultation is a consultation: and I’m really not interested in weighing it against other industries or businesses.

Here's where I am really confused, so I will ask the question:  As a sex worker, how and why are you actually 'consulting' your client ?  What problem is the client presenting to you, which you will give professional advice on how to solve it, and how (in some detail) you plan to reach that goal of solving it for him ? 

That's why I'm saying the wording of 'consultation' is being tossed around like confetti by providers. I'm guessing (again, 'guessing' - not assuming or accusing) they may think it makes them sound more 'professional' or 'respected' as a businessman, but they are using this word incorrectly.

I would also guess that if a client is having a sexual problem, they would probably consult with a sex therapist to solve the problem (and that would come with a free consultation of presenting the problem and the plan to solve it) before going to a sex provider to solve the problem.

[+ DrownedBoy]

12 hours ago, TallMuscl37 said:

I don’t want to be compared to a lawyer

Don't worry - you're not comparable at all...