Jamie21

Thank you! I can’t take life too seriously, especially when doing sex work. There’s so many funny situations to write about 🙂

Time wasters! Ugh…a pain. I’m working on a chat bot on my website that will engage prospective clients in the discussion before they get to me. It will be programmed to weed out the picture hunters, sex chat wankers, prevaricating procrastinators who will “definitely book when they get paid” …plus the guys who somehow think I’m a female? Then when they have been sidelined by the chat bot (who is called Dick):“hello I’m Dick, your friendly chat bot here to assist you in your massage enquiry with Jamie. How may I help you today? Just type what your question is”. If they say anything other than “I’d like to book a x hour in call / out call at x time on x date” then the bot engages them in their fantasy with endless inane chat. If they get bored of the bot then they go through to my ‘on hold’ line where the following message plays “sorry but Jamie is busy right now… your call is important to him, please hold until he becomes available” the background music will be the sound track to one of my porn movies “ugh harder…yeah stick it in…mmmm…fuck me…yeah etc etc” playing on a loop while the client pleasures himself as he waits. It will be a premium number so I get some revenue until he shoots his load and hangs up. When it’s all ready and working I’ll market it to other sex workers. It will be called Time Waster Active Terminator or TWAT for short.

Ha ha I’ve done a few massages for clients in apartments as strange as that. One was decorated like an oriental brothel. This was in Chiswick.

I’d say it’s a bit more complicated than that. Yes one of the reasons for doing sex work is for the money but if that’s your only reason for doing it you probably won’t be very good or last very long. As well as getting paid the motivation to do sex work is in my experience much more than just making a living. And whilst I agree clients are human… some don’t see their sex worker as being a normal human. That’s the problem.

Basically be a decent person yeah? That’s kind of a given but it’s surprising that there’s some clients (only a few) who don’t manage that. The difficult clients for me are the guys who seem to have massive issues about seeing me: they won’t make eye contact, they are uncommunicative and seem kind of inhibited but then very quickly they start to behave like they’re in a porn movie and then once they climax it’s like ‘oh I’ve got to get out of here immediately’ levels of shame. I know doing any kind of sex work is akin to being a therapist of the mind as well as the body…. in fact I think that’s the key to doing sex work well, understanding the motivation of the client (the brain is the biggest sex organ!), but really there’s a lot of therapy some clients need working out about their issues over seeing a sex worker. Much of it seems to be guilt caused by religious indoctrination.

I simply don’t agree to client requests that I can’t do, so I turn down about 30% of enquiries because I’m not available and the client isn’t able to find an alternative time. That’s just too bad and I don’t get upset about it. Most people have busy schedules so it’s no surprise that if they book say 3pm then they want 3pm and not 3:15pm. Just turn up on time! It works both ways, if they’re late for me then I’m not hanging around. Over 10 minutes late and it’s cancelled. We reschedule if we’re both ok with that.

It could just be a misunderstanding on his part. Happened to me once… although I was the provider! A regular client had been talking about arranging a session. We’d discussed times and days etc (on WhatsApp). So, I’m working out at the gym, and I see a missed call on my phone. Then I see a text ‘Hey Jamie I’m here’. Confusion on my part….am I missing something? I text back… ‘sorry? Don’t understand?’…. The guy texts ‘I’m outside, we said 3pm…’ Whoops. Turns out the booking was much more firm on his side than mine. Looking back at his messages I could see how he’d interpreted it as a firm booking and I had interpreted it as a possible which he would confirm (he was always asking about availability and then not booking because he had a very unpredictable schedule). So I’d assumed he didn’t want the time and hadn’t booked it in my diary. I apologised and explained the mix up and he was very relaxed about it, so no harm done. Now I always make sure the booking is confirmed explicitly. The other possibility is that your guy has been involved in some kind of accident. I hope that’s not the case.

Yes high profile or even clients in sensitive jobs can’t be expected to provide pics. I never ask for pics, however sometimes clients send one (and often those clients tend not to book…it’s one of those ‘red flags’ that tend to be an indication of flakiness unfortunately). Everyone has a different threshold of ‘games’ they’ll tolerate. Generally the sooner a client gets to the point, the better. That’s a sign they’re not flaky.

Wow imagine if you visited and had the massage without checking the rate? Then it came to paying…..Masseur: “How would you like to pay?”, client: “I’ve got cash” masseur “cool, that’s $4.3billion please” client “what????” masseur “oh wait yes, you had the ‘in massage’ upsell, so that’s $4.3billion plus $30 for the load you shot in my mouth”… client “do you take credit cards?”

Yes the table is far too narrow and slippery! My table is wide enough for the client to keep his arms by his side. It’s much more comfortable for him. No wonder they moved to the couch for fucking, you don’t want to slip off the table!

I massage naked, it’s more natural. I’d be naked 24/7 if it was possible!! Some clients like me to start the massage in shorts or a jock. I think that works nicely too. I don’t wear anything on my torso. There’s three main reasons and benefits to do the massage naked: 1) body contact is better done naked. I mount the table and in parts of the massage I use my whole body, so nudity is necessary. 2) the oil tends to ruin clothes. Even if you’re careful it gets on clothes and stains them. So it’s simply easier to be naked. 3) some clients like to interact and touch me as I massage them, so they prefer me naked or in a jock that can be removed at some point. Of course this is all in a sensual massage environment. Delivering a therapeutic non sensual non erotic massage I wear shorts and t shirt.

No, it doesn’t. I think massaging very muscular guys is interesting. And very occasionally they’re more hung than me. That doesn’t affect the session either 😂

I didn’t say they were prostitutes. I said they’re both sex workers. Your example of Uber driver and private chauffeur is apt. They’re both types of transport provider. Sensual masseur and escort are both types of sex worker. They both work with people’s sexual desires, in different ways. The point about most sensual masseurs being happy to do the work of an escort for a bit of extra cash is your guess ….’most’?? what % do you reckon? I think it’s pure conjecture on your part. What price someone sets on their time and service is up to them. I guess you’re concerned they’re undercutting your rates and taking business. Well that happens with sex worker masseurs too where ‘spa style’ therapy masseurs sometimes do extras (yes at risk of their licence). I’d say if you’re good at what you do then you need not worry about people under cutting you. You’re in the UK, escorting is legal here so no need to go through that pretence if you’re paying for my time and anything that happens is unrelated to the payment….especially when you’re advertising additional services that carry a premium price!

The official massage regulator is in charge of massage descriptions and content. If you’ve booked a sensual massage and didn’t get the standard release then you can complain to the regulator for compensation. The regulator requires that a sensual massage includes at least 5 strokes of the client’s cock (4 is too few since they could have been accidental brushes) and his balls are tickled including touch on the perineum. The release must include at least 3 spurts. Pre cum leakage is not sufficient. If your massage failed to meet these minimum standards it’s considered eligible for compensation. Applicants should send their claim (including pictures, any witness statements and the full details of their masseur) to Regulations Unit Bureau, Trading Under-delivery Group, or [email protected] where their claim will be reviewed. If they’re successful someone from the regulator’s office will send instructions on how to self release.

Oh God yes…massage oil has leaked. I was going to an outcall. Opened my bag and all the oil had leaked out. Everything was covered and I had no oil to do the massage. Fortunately the client had some but it was not like my usual oil and it really disrupted me. Now I always carry a spare bottle. You learn…

I go by the package. So many times I’ve had the lube somehow open and leak in my bag….especially those ones that have a pump on top that you twist to open. The mess when everything is covered in lube is a nightmare, plus the cost of replacing it. So my first decision is does it have a top that will stay shut!

The trouble is ‘certain clients’ is not very easy to manage. Easier to just apply the rule to everyone. I don’t want to give anyone the wrong idea; some clients would take it as an opening to negotiate a discount, or even think there’s an opportunity for a different kind of relationship. You get some guys who mistake intimacy during a session as an indication that there’s more to it than a transaction. That’s the challenge, if you’re good the client can easily get the wrong impression. For example I’m happy to kiss during a massage, I think it’s an important part of the intimacy of a sensual massage (if the client wants that of course). Kissing can get very passionate. But that kind of thing can be misinterpreted which has occasionally happened. Then I’ve had to let him down gently which was really difficult. As well as being respectful of confidentiality I’m also trying to avoid messages that some clients might easily misinterpret.

Just don’t do it. If a client wants to see me they’ll be in touch. I don’t need to go asking for business fortunately. I don’t travel either so there’s no need to let anyone know I’m in town. Many clients are in relationships, some are in high profile roles, they want discretion. If I contact them that could jeopardise their situation. I think discretion is of utmost importance.

Strict rule, never contact the client to initiate a meeting. I’ve never done it and never would. It’s intrusive. He’s really trying it on especially by proposing to charge and even more so by then offering a discount! I’d go back and say to him, ‘ok but this time you pay me’ and quote him the amount he charged you. That’s tongue in cheek of course, but it would be fun just to see his reaction. I bet if you did go back, on whatever arrangement, the session wouldn’t be as good because his proposal will have soured things. What a shame he reacted like he did because I guess you’d probably have booked another session sometime.

Yes it’s quite common. Mostly though I think it comes from their inhibitions about gay sex. Those who are comfortable with their sexuality tend to know what they want and ask for it, it’s a straight forward request and booking. However there’s men of all ages who for a variety of reasons are inhibited about their sexuality. These guys tend to ask naive questions. They are strongly conflicted between their desire for man to man action and their self image and identity which is outwardly heterosexual. It tends to result in them seeking out opportunities to explore their gay side in ways that protects their straight identity, hence the ‘playing the client’ role. Eventually their desire overcomes the inhibitions holding them back and they start to actually act on their desires. So I see it as helping these guys to accept that same sex attraction is totally normal, healthy and something to be enjoyed. Massage offers them a safe way to do that….much better than a Grindr hookup.

I’ve been. It’s extremely hedonistic. Anything goes, people we’re having sex openly on the beach and in the sea. You walk around naked or wearing very little, in shops, along the street, in the bars and clubs. You need not take any clothes, unless they’re things like fetish wear. It’s a mixed crowd but I’d say it’s mainly swingers. Interesting place.

Agree, it’s a way guys can take part in hiring but vicariously so as to protect their sense of self.

I’m sad reading all these comments. Massage should always be something that one looks forward to as a special treat. What is it that makes guys hire masseurs who are just seeing you as an ‘easy way of making money’. These masseurs can’t care about their reputation or about getting repeat clients. I’d say there’s clues in their adverts that might indicate there the ‘rub and tug’ type: they’ve not been around long, their pictures are of them topless with 8 pack and muscles, they have bullshit about mystical benefits of massage and sprinkle the word Tantra in their adverts. They’re open to doing the massage on a bed. They want a pic or description of you before they’ll confirm your booking. Those kind of things, especially all of them together, are probably a clue that he’s doing this for a bit of easy cash….because he can.

The next one.

Oh dear this is becoming like Twitter. I avoid expressing any kind of opinion on there because it just degenerates into ad hominem insults. I just post thirst trap pics and videos! Even those attract some strange comments sometimes. I suppose in a forum called ‘ask a provider’ it’s reasonable to assume most of the replies should be from providers. I try to give my provider perspective but I am conscious of trying not to offend potential clients with things I might say. I think on balance though it’s positive to contribute here because a genuinely held opinion put respectfully is likely to be positive for business. I mean if you don’t like my views or position you’re probably not going to be a good client are you? So no loss there. Best you feel an affinity with me because then it’s likely to be a good session. It’s kind of like putting heavily airbrushed (or even worse, faked) pics on your profile to attract clients. When they see the real you they’ll only be disappointed. I like to hear what clients think about the ‘ask a provider’ questions though so I think it’s good for clients to post things on the thread. However the client comments do show that there are some big misunderstandings about what life is like as a provider. I don’t work 2 hours a day and make $100k net a year. It’s at least 3 hours a day…… Before I started doing this work I too had those misunderstandings (and I used to hire) so I can see where they come from. But now having been doing this kind of work for about 5 years I also see the other side. So clients, if a provider says ‘this is how it is from my perspective’ then he’s doing so from a position of greater knowledge than you (even if you’ve been hiring for years) and you shouldn’t say he’s wrong because you haven’t walked in his shoes have you? You’re entitled to your opinion of course, but I know who’s opinion on the job from the provider perspective I will take more note of.