Jamie21

I think the reasons people hire sex workers are as varied as the types of people who hire. It could be loneliness, it could be a desire for excitement, or the thrill of doing something illicit, or to get experience or to give up control (especially prevalent in people who have a lot of responsibilities in their lives) or just that someone has lots of commitments and hasn’t the time to cultivate a relationship, so they get some ‘me time’ with a sex worker. The important thing is not to judge someone for their motives because unfortunately society places all sorts of negative connotations to using sex workers which are just not valid or fair. I think sex work, whether it’s BF experience, a massage or a full on sex session is an essential outlet that can help people manage their lives. We all need a little fantasy and escapism sometimes.

All sorts of different things might be included in BF experience. I once went shopping with a guy, that was his definition of BF experience, he just wanted to buy some clothes and have me advise him on what looked good (Although I don’t profess to be a fashion expert!). In the end he bought me more stuff than he did for himself. Afterwards we went back to his hotel and used the pool and gym. Then back to his room where he ordered room service. We ate and chilled out together for a while, I gave him a massage on the bed (happy end style lol) and that was it. He really enjoyed the whole day, it was much more than a sexual experience.

Nope, just an ‘in time’ person. I stay in the moment more than I think about the next thing.

The more explicit the chat / pics shared the less likely they are to commit. I have regular contacts from guys looking to schedule a session with me. Every 6m or so they get horny enough to initiate a discussion about all the things they want to happen in the session. I often wonder what prompts it?; the phase of the moon?, the weather?, some unconscious trigger such as they saw a 🍆at the supermarket? Anyway whatever it is they message me with their shopping list of activities and request for my availability, with ‘definitely interested in booking mate’ comments….(yes the definitively heterosexual language is used….’mate’, ‘I’m str8 but…’ and the classic ‘straight acting’) and usually a bad pic of their ass. Of course nothing is ever booked and I hear nothing for 6m or more until the next time their desire has overcome their inhibition. Then they contact me as if we’ve never spoken before and the game is played out again.

Regular client of mine likes to bring in another guy for part of our session. The other guy is chosen by me (but with my clients final approval) and I include the other guys rate in my overall price. Session will start with just me and the client, then after about 45m the other guy arrives. We perform for the client to watch. Then the other guy leaves and just me and the client spend the rest of the time together. Client gets 2 guys but doesn’t have to pay for 2 for whole session. There’s all sorts of ways of arranging it but I think the key, as a client, for successfully arranging something like this is to let one of the guys do the arrangements, to your instructions otherwise you’ll end up in a logistics nightmare.

I’d advise arrange it through one of them and agree the combined fee with him. Don’t assume that if you book them separately that they’re happy to work together. If they know each other then they’ll discuss their duo rate and then one of them will let you know. It could even be that they’ve worked together previously and they have an agreed rate.

I’ve considered charging more for certain times or days. Example charging more at weekends or offering a discount for quiet periods. A bit like Uber dynamic pricing. But it seems a bit complicated to manage but would work like this: a flat rate for a session but with a 10%, 20% or 30% premium depending on the day of the week or the time. Trouble is I can’t seem to see much pattern in demand!

Yes I had a regular client recently ask me for clips from my porn. I gave him the website, which of course he has to subscribe to, and he replied with ‘I don’t pay for porn’. Well that’s fine of course there’s plenty of free porn out there but you pay for mine. Some of it is on the free tube sites (not pirated, I put it there) but if you want to watch them all then you’re going to have to pay. It costs to make decent films.

Yes, ‘free’ sex is available, through hook up apps and at saunas or the like. Guys that think ‘why should I pay when I can get the same free on Grindr’ don’t understand the difference. On Grindr you’ll spend hours trying to line someone up, if they agree to meet you’ll likely find that they aren’t much interested in satisfying your needs (but they want you to satisfy theirs), and they probably aren’t much good at anything. So you saved some money but wasted your time. If you hire a professional you’ll find they will make themselves available much more readily, they’re focused on your needs, they know what they’re doing and you can just relax and enjoy yourself.

The Great Depression was caused by mistakes in management of the economy by governments, fixed exchange rates and protectionist policies on trade. I’m simplifying it but in essence it was avoidable had leaders made different decisions. There’s better understanding now of these things. No one can predict the future but the likelihood of another depression like that is low. Anyway, this isn’t a macro economics thread, or about history. We’ve gone off subject. This is about no shows. I don’t get many (1 in 100) because I have good screening and I don’t work at the bottom end of the market.

I agree. Prices won’t drop. The elasticity of demand is low for sex work. It’s because there isn’t a natural substitute. If you’re horny and want guaranteed effective relief then what else would you do? Spend the money on a slap up meal? Buy a new pair of shoes? You might try to get yourself off but that won’t scratch the itch. No, the best way is go to an expert. It’s been that way for thousands of years. A recession won’t change it. I think there’s a bit of wishful thinking going on with those who expect the market to be flooded with sex workers offering cheap sessions. A few people might join the industry thinking it’s easy but they’ll soon realise they’re not up to it and leave.

Saturday evening is quiet. Most of my clients are weekday daytime or Sunday. Everyone has other things to do Saturday night. Busiest days? Monday and Tuesday. Why? People had a bad weekend and want a treat to get them through the week. Plus daytime is ideal cover if you are seeing me on the quiet.

Great detective work! 🙂

Hmmmm…Interesting article, I shall ask all future sexual partners for a sample of their microbiome data before engaging with them. If the test comes back that they’re carrying microbiomes that are the naughty ones I shall reject them as a sexual partner (unless they’re extremely hot, or hung, or rich, or they have exquisite taste in music and art). Seriously though, that article is so obviously quack medicine. It’s full of unproven hypotheses, thinly veiled criticisms of people who don’t practice monogamy within a marriage and unsubstantiated claims. Read the last part: “But the exact mechanisms by which the gut microbiome can impact mental health is still a work in progress. It is highly likely that dys- biosis is associated with mood and anxiety symptoms. The bottom line: Sexual activity—whether it is heavy kissing, vagi- nal intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, or extensive skin contact—can lead to the exchange of microbiota. If an individ- ual has dysbiosis, that could impact the mental health of their sexual partner(s). This raises the question of whether counseling patients about avoiding indiscriminate sex and practicing safe sex is as important for mental health as diet and exercise counselling is for physical health” Still work in progress! ….meaning ‘we found something that we can use to scare people into being controlled by us’. The language is vague; ‘could’, ‘if’ and ‘raises the question’. It’s not a scientific paper but is masquerading as one. My guess is the article was commissioned by the religious right to find another angle against people who don’t conform to their agenda.

Seems a bit too soon to do that. I’d find it a bit strange. It’s quite likely, if he’s any good, that many of his clients feel like you do after the session. It’s his job to make you feel special. You’re now thinking ‘ok we got on great, I wasn’t just another client!’ ….and he’s probably thinking ‘nice client, what shall I have for dinner…’ I hope not, maybe he thought afterwards that it was something different, in which case that’s great! But chances are that’s unlikely, and I wouldn’t risk finding out. Sorry to say but it’s just part of the job. I’ve seen hundreds of clients. I sincerely hope they all felt I was genuinely nice and I guess many have because they come back. However only one has become a friend that I’d welcome that kind of enquiry from (and obviously he’s no longer hiring me, now we meet as friends). I’d be worried if a client made an enquiry like yours after their first booking. It was at least 12 bookings over a year before the guy I’m referring to became a friend rather than a client.

Oh yes there’s a lot of sweeping feelings under the carpet in British culture. There’s good and bad to it, like anything. It makes people resilient; the carry on regardless attitude, but also distant and closed. I hate to cause offence (unless I intended to!!) so it makes one very careful about engaging with people in situations like this. If it’s clear that someone is likely to interpret things in ways that are fundamentally different to what was meant then I think it’s safest to just not engage with those conversations. I’d rather ignore than cause offence.

Possibly! My culture is British, we use humour to defuse tension, and where people seem to be taking themselves too seriously, when we’re feeling anxious, when we want to make a serious point without appearing to be too clever, when we want to change the subject, when there’s no weather to talk about….actually we use it all the time. Yes it’s a friendly forum, well moderated and generally tolerant (unlike Twitter OMG). I like most of the exchanges! There’s a one or two contributors who I don’t engage with now though because it’s too difficult.

50% of guys who try to book me are unsuccessful because they assume I’m sitting around all day doing nothing just to be available for anyone who asks. It’s unfortunate but the ‘available now?’ clients usually end up disappointed. Client: “hey, are you free later today at 3?” (This is at 1pm). Me: “sorry no I’m busy today” Client: “oh, I’m in town only today and was hoping you were free” Me: “ah ok that’s different then, I’ll cancel the things I was doing and book you in” (this could be me being sarcastic 😉). Client: “great thanks I’ll get back to you in a bit when I know my schedule….” That does really happen…like ‘reserving’ the time but not booking! I’m not a train timetable with services at set times. I’m a restaurant table booking; If all the tables are full you won’t get in. I’m open every day but all the punters who were organised enough to book ahead get the day / time they wanted. The ones who aren’t organised end up eating at McDonalds.

I don’t want a pic from any prospective client. If they send a face pic there’s a 50% chance they’ll flake. If they send a cock/ass pick there’s a 99% chance they’ll flake.

So is typing with one hand

Sex email chat doesn’t quite have the immediacy does it?

I’ve had a client who was very conflicted. He said some really quite derogatory things about people doing sex work, and he implied that I was only doing what I do because I had no other work choice and that I secretly hated myself. Told him I chose to do it, I had a university degree, was well qualified and I was 100% comfortable with myself….except of course I wanted abs and an extra inch on my cock, although that would make it 9 inches and perhaps I was being greedy. He laughed and said oh I was talking about others generally, not you. But of course I knew he had meant me.

There is a free demo video on my website but it’s behind a password. Clients have to contact me for the password. I’ve considered charging a small fee for the password but it’s too much hassle. Plenty of clients ask for the password and then never book but I view it as a kind of filter: if they liked the video that much they’ll book, and if they didn’t like it they won’t waste my time asking lots of questions and prevaricating. My more explicit porn stuff is mostly behind a paywall on justforfans. There are some videos out there on the free tube sites but not that much. So I do make passive income from material I’ve filmed. I agree with you @Jarrod_Uncutthat trying to win over uncommitted clients is a waste of time.

Yeah that could be it. I did wonder sometimes if they’re doing a last minute douche check? Anyway, if they’re not showered immediately before their session then it’s less likely I’ll do any rimming. I know many masseurs wouldn’t include that anyway so I guess the client has low expectations of it …but I do like to include it because I love rimming. It’s their loss if they decline to shower. Yes that’s pretty bad, as Shakespeare said “an ass by any other name would smell so sweet” or did I get that wrong? Also not good if you finger his prostate and it comes out dirty. I just clean off and carry on but won’t be rimming him. I guess we’ve gone off topic though here….so to bring it back I will add that I don’t charge extra for rimming or for prostate massage as part of the massage. 🙂

Nothing is booked until the date, time and location are confirmed and agreed. Otherwise it’s just an enquiry. Clients ask me if I’m available on certain days that might align with their travel plans. This is sensible as I might be away or busy so I understand why clients check. But we agree that until they definitively book the time might be taken by someone else. I think your provider was unprofessional. Probably annoyed after a series of cancellations which I can empathise with but it’s still not right to take out his annoyance on you. It’s an inherent problem of his modus operandi and he should either adjust his approach by taking deposits before travelling or simply get out of the business if his model causes him that much trouble. You were generous offering to pay him half.