CastaDiva

The premium membership is not expensive and allows you access to additional facts and photographs. You’re going to spend a fair amount on an escort and you want to make sure you know as much as possible about the guy. Sometimes you can’t see his dick without that premium membership. You should get it. It’ll improve your research experience and help ensure that you get what you want. 😋

Even the most experienced of us had a first time hire.  A bit of trepidation is expected but fortunately for most of us, that first touch, first kiss, first tingle of excitement usually has the nerves on the run and our cock rising to the encounter.   You are requesting a pretty vanilla experience and you described what you want clearly here.  Have him come in, offer him a beverage.  Have him come sit next to you on the couch.  If he doesn't initiate after a minute or two lean in for the kiss or place your hand on his groin.  You both know why you are there, so there is no reason to act like a teenager on a first date, though you may feel that way initially.  Once your eyes have met, your lips have touched and you hand has found your way into his pants, allow the action and the juices to flow.  
My suggestion is to be sober, but if you do take something to take the edge off, do not indulge to the point of not being in control of yourself and the situation.  
Also, do not be afraid to say no.  If he tries to do something you are not ready to do, a simple, not that or not yet should have him moving onto something else.  He will likely do the same.  Good luck with that first hire.  
 

Tell him you want to feel incredibly desirable. Even to someone as handsome as himself.
You want him to be in charge and you want to feel cherished.
That's simple enough that any professional provider would understand the scenario

I get that completely, and flakiness either way is always bad. If I genuinely couldn't meet someone, I would try to find out a time where we could and I could accommodate to figure something out. I would never flake on anyone it's just not who I am. I think the only difference is clients can always move on to the next, and it's not the same for us. 

Great detective work! 🙂

It is not rude at all. Go for it!

Hmmmm…Interesting article, I shall ask all future sexual partners for a sample of their microbiome data before engaging with them. If the test comes back that they’re carrying microbiomes that are the naughty ones I shall reject them as a sexual partner (unless they’re extremely hot, or hung, or rich, or they have exquisite taste in music and art). 
Seriously though, that article is so obviously quack medicine. It’s full of unproven hypotheses, thinly veiled criticisms of people who don’t practice monogamy within a marriage and unsubstantiated claims. Read the last part:
“But the exact mechanisms by which the gut microbiome can impact mental health is still a work in progress. It is highly likely that dys- biosis is associated with mood and anxiety symptoms.
The bottom line: Sexual activity—whether it is heavy kissing, vagi- nal intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, or extensive skin contact—can lead to the exchange of microbiota. If an individ- ual has dysbiosis, that could impact the mental health of their sexual partner(s). This raises the question of whether counseling patients about avoiding indiscriminate sex and practicing safe sex is as important for mental health as diet and exercise counselling is for physical health”
Still work in progress! ….meaning ‘we found something that we can use to scare people into being controlled by us’. The language is vague; ‘could’, ‘if’ and ‘raises the question’. It’s not a scientific paper but is masquerading as one. 
My guess is the article was commissioned by the religious right to find another angle against people who don’t conform to their agenda. 
 

That’s a really sorry story. I think you probably chose the wrong provider. A better guy would have slowed things down and made you feel more special during the sex. Also if you book an hour it kind of implies you want a session where you get down to it faster, which is what he seems to have provided? 
I’d not assume that because he didn’t get hard while you fucked him that he wasn’t into you. If I bottom for a client I always get hard but I know that lots of guys can’t stay hard when they get fucked. 
I think next time if you want a better experience that’s less rushed then take time to find a guy that is more professional (look for experience, recommendations, has he a website?, is he busy?). Also if you can afford it book a longer session. 

I'm just a bystander in this dislogue but I like the way you have handled yourself on this forum and the respectful way you attempted to respond to the various comments made about you by forum participants. Bravo. 

I think the reasons people hire sex workers are as varied as the types of people who hire. It could be loneliness, it could be a desire for excitement, or the thrill of doing something illicit, or to get experience or to give up control (especially prevalent in people who have a lot of responsibilities in their lives) or just that someone has lots of commitments and hasn’t the time to cultivate a relationship, so they get some ‘me time’ with a sex worker.
The important thing is not to judge someone for their motives because unfortunately society places all sorts of negative connotations to using sex workers which are just not valid or fair. I think sex work, whether it’s BF experience, a massage or a full on sex session is an essential outlet that can help people manage their lives. We all need a little fantasy and escapism sometimes. 
 
 

Is there a listing of previously posted topics available? Perhaps a list of top titles? If so, how can I access it?   Thanks 

Several good definitions here with specifics. 
 
To me, more generally...
He makes it feel like he wasn't hired. 
 

For me, @Boy4 the BFE is lots of physical attention, touching, kissing, extended foreplay leading up to passionate love-making.
So it is very much the romanticized ideal rather than the reality related by @lonely_john

Plenty of gay escorts are not sexually attracted to you either. News flash- they are only having sex with you for money.

Do you believe any of the escorts you hire are "attracted to you" ?
 

If the fact the man is straight is the primary reason for attraction for a gay man, this might be a fetish. But absent that factor, if the attraction involves the man's looks (handsome, well-built, and so on), mannerisms (so-called "straight acting" as opposed to -no offense intended here, please- "swishy"), personality (intellectual, funny, blunt or -no pun intended- straight-forward), or other common factors for attractions between people, it seems natural to me.
Since a gay man, by definition, means a man sexually attracted to another man, what would be more natural to that condition but to find the very epitome of masculinity attractive and desirable?
Getting one of them to agree, however, is more problematic. As a boss I had years ago told me regarding finding and hiring desirable candidates, "Selection is a management function; availability is in the hands of God."

I don't see anything wrong with a provider looking to secure a regular customer. If you're not interested in another session so soon...just say no and say when are ARE ready for round two.
As was stated above - this is a fairly normal business practice for out of town providers who will notify their regulars they will be around at such-n-such a date. 
 

Having never been kissed, if I were to meet with someone I think I would like to try that.  But I get that some prefer not to, and would respect their choice.

Fresh breath is extremely important! I always use mouthwash before seeing clients, even if it’s not going to involve kissing (I love kissing but some clients don’t want it) there’s times your face is close so it’s important to smell fresh.
Some people are naturally clumsy and that goes for kissing too. I agree with @Shawn Monroe that some guys kiss badly, maybe because they’re inexperienced at it. I’ve had clients lunge at me mouth open which is quite disconcerting. Those guys tend to be over excited even from the start so it’s challenging to control the situation. Say we have 90 minutes and 10 minutes into the massage they’re wanting to kiss and are ready to cum. Cool down!!
I have a client who was like that every time, he would turn up so aroused and liked to start with a kiss and that got him even more excited. I suggested a way for him to better enjoy the massage. Now he unloads in my mouth at the start, we kiss and share his load, then he’s ready to relax for the massage. It’s a happy starting (he gets a happy end too). 

I think you have a great point here, @ThroatCummer . To me, no kissing is the absolute deal breaker in hiring. Furthermore, when I sense that my partner (paid or not paid) is not really enjoying kissing me, when he is not being truly responsive to my kissing, I totally lose interest and my dick goes limp. 

Also worth mentioning I hired a provider one time who had kissing listed on their ad as an "into" but when I was with them they informed me they don't. So I always ask and bring it up as I stated above. 

I think that the second point is the vast majority. If I had to put numbers on your list of four things, I would say:  5%. 75%. 15%. 5%.
Kissing... real kissing... is something very, very hard to fake. You might be 'straight' or not attracted to men, yet always able to get rock hard and fuck. But IMHO, kissing is the real tell when it comes to the provider's true sexual orientation. 
I started hiring back about six months ago and had a friend of a friend give me some tips before I jumped in these waters. His biggest piece of advice? Make sure your provider is gay or genuinely bi, but you really want someone gay. It'll be way more enjoyable all around. 
His advice was spot on. I've only since hired five guys. Two bisexual and three gay. Both of the bisexual guys were a bit 'mechanical' in the motions. All three of the gay ones kissed with a fucking passion that made me weak in the knees. 

Inexperienced young man.

Just a quick flake alert on Chase Gavin in New Orleans:  https://app.rent.men/ChaseGavin
I decided to initiate contact because he epitomizes what I'm looking for, and that rarely happens anymore.
His ad is only 12 days old, and he has no phone for contact, and I've always been reluctant to use RM's message system, but he's so appealing to me I did go ahead and use it.  Here's our correspondence:
Me (3:35 p.m. CST yesterday):
Hi, Chase.  My name is <first name supplied>.  I like your ad!  Here is a link for my own profile, which has as hashtags the only things I seek: <like supplied>
Chase (4:07 p.m. CST yesterday):
hey there yeah we could work something out  how are ya?
Me (4:51 p.m. CST yesterday):
I’m well.  Are there days of the week and times that work best for you?
Chase (4:56 p.m. CST yesterday):
this weekend could work
Me (5:09 p.m. CST yesterday):
Okay.  Would Saturday about 2 pm work well for you?
Me, after an extended period of no reply yet the system showing he'd logged on several times (7:39 p.m. CST Yesterday):
If it doesn’t, just indicate which day and time does work for you, and I should be able to make it work.  I can also host, but I live in Baton Rouge.
I checked several times today, and RM's messaging system shows him having logged on within a couple of hours from me having done so (notwithstanding that his ad itself shows it's been two days since he logged on which is not correct because even the ad itself earlier today showed he'd logged on today).  Hence, I'm chalking this up as a flake experience and wanted to memorialize that fact in the event anyone runs a search on this site. 

I'm surprised at the Mods allowing someone to come into the post and start bullying other members of the Forum, calling them names such as "disgusting" (a very strong word intended to both provoke and upset), for being attracted to young men above the age of consent in their early 20s employed as porn actors for above-board adult pornographic studios and for doing or saying absolutely nothing wrong at all. This is outright bullying.
@Gymowner has come across as very angry and aggressive, calling those of us who like twinks "disgusting" and basically equating us with and referring to us as paedophiles in all but name. I have no interest whatsoever in lads below the age of consent, and the two guys I posted a pic of are adult porn actors who look to me to be in their early 20s and were indeed above the age of consent at the time the pic was taken.
It doesn't look good for the Forums when Mods allow this kind of behaviour as displayed by @Gymowner. This post is supposed to be about porn stars we'd like to hire, not a discussion in which some Forum members call other Forum members horrible nasty names , berate them and allude to them as being paedophiles or on the same level as paedophiles. 
We should be able to post about which porn actors we like free of intimidation or bullying for saying which ones we like; free of being accused of being the same as men who are into things which are illegal. It is a disgrace that this bully has been allowed to just jump on an innocent comment in which nothing wrong was said  and use it to start being nasty and to cause hostility in what should be a welcoming Forum where members treat one another with respect.