Two Down, One To Go

[mike carey]

@BasketBaller, Be Happy.

[Epigonos]

Wonderful! I shed a tear of joy both for your happiness and your sadness. Do consider joining us in Palm Springs in the spring. I would love to meet you

[BasketBaller]

You do not mention if you were shedding tears but perhaps that is part of the reason your older son drove home.

I never truly shed tears but I misted up a number of times-- seeing him in the uniform the first time, "Be happy," watching him walk back to his platoon without a backward look. I was grateful the oldest offered to drive so I could just sit and ponder. Truthfully, the most emotional thing of the day was seeing that his twin had gone to sleep in his brother's bed, a complete surprise. More to come, I imagine.

Edited June 30, 2017 by BasketBaller

[+ HornyRetiree]

I regret there isn't a teary-eyed icon for a "Like" as there is in face book. Color me moved.

 

Yes, I had tears............................................

[+ glennnn]

Like the others, I am moved and honored that you shared this journey with us. What a man! What a father! I have only one child, a grown son, and I'm grateful every day for his love, respect and friendship. Your adventures with your boys stretch out in front of you. Continue to embrace every moment. It goes quickly.

[+ nycman]

Truthfully, the most emotional thing of the day was seeing that his twin had gone to sleep in his bed, a complete surprise. More to come, I imagine

 

You have no idea how much I'm enjoying being a "vicarious Dad" through you.

 

It's been eye opening, moving, and something I never expected from these boards.

 

Thank you.

[+ Gar1eth]

@BasketBaller -my fraternal twin nephews are 6 years old. They just completed their 1st year of public schooling (kindergarten). As I mentioned in an earlier post, their parents put them in different classes this year, so this was their 1st minor separation. You make me wonder what the future holds in store for them.

 

Gman

[BasketBaller]

@BasketBaller -my fraternal twin nephews are 6 years old. They just completed their 1st year of public schooling (kindergarten). As I mentioned in an earlier post, their parents put them in different classes this year, so this was their 1st minor separation. You make me wonder what the future holds in store for them.

 

Gman

Parents of twins are encouraged to give them separate activities, but mine wouldn't have it. Their grade school was small so they were in the same class, and if we tried doing separate activities they'd dig in their heels. We, or I, relaxed about it and let them find their separate interests, which they did. But as I said earlier, I don't think they've spent more than a week apart before.

[N13]

It's a relief to hear from a happy family! Treasure it, they are rare.

[+ sniper]

Be happy kinda sounds like he might have a clue. The plot thickens...

Thank you for sharing your story.

[+ WmClarke]

Then, almost immediately, older brother and I will drive twin brother to Chicago to start his freshman year at DePaul,

I thought of you several times during IML when I walked down this street in Chicago.

http://i1305.photobucket.com/albums/s545/WmClarke/IMG_2620_zpsulxdmut5.jpg

 

Such exciting times--to send them out on their own. Thanks for sharing!

[TruthBTold]

I shopped in the book store here a few hours ago.

[Epigonos]

I would like to very humbly state, with tears in my eyes, what a joy, and an honor it is to be an active member of this site. When I read some of the loving responses on this thread I realize what a great bunch of guys many of you are and what a great thing it is to be a part of this family. My heartfelt love to you all.

Edited July 2, 2017 by Epigonos

[BabyBoomer]

Truthfully, the most emotional thing of the day was seeing that his twin had gone to sleep in his brother's bed.

 

It probably gave him a sense of closeness & comfort.

 

~Boomer ~

[BigK]

Basketballer, you are truly a gifted writer. But you've also got great source material. Like many others here I thank you for sharing with us. Tears freely falling.

[BasketBaller]

Be happy kinda sounds like he might have a clue. The plot thickens...

Thank you for sharing your story.

That was my first reaction. He might have meant be happy I'm following my dream, be happy when you're alone in the house, or be happy you don't have to pay tuition. But... that was my first reaction.

[+ quoththeraven]

Truthfully, the most emotional thing of the day was seeing that his twin had gone to sleep in his brother's bed, a complete surprise. More to come, I imagine.

 

That was the detail that most got to me as well. Best wishes for everyone's journey in your household.

[BasketBaller]

I would like to very humbly state, with tears in my eyes, what a joy, and an honor it is to be an active member of this site. When I read some of the loving responses on this thread I realize what a great bunch of guys many of your are and what a great thing it is to be a part of this family. My heartfelt love to you all.

I can't agree more. When I started sharing this part of my life here I had no idea I would get such reactions, and they have been so helpful and even important to me. As I said earlier in the thread, I have been able to post things here I've never shared with anyone, written things I've never verbalized, and that's kind of amazing. I'm not sure what this adventure would be like without having this outlet.

Edited July 1, 2017 by BasketBaller

[mike carey]

I can't agree more. When I started sharing his part of my life here I had no idea I would get such reactions, and they have been so helpful and even important to me. As I said earlier in the thread, I have been able to post things here I've never shared with anyone, written things I've never verbalized, and that's kind of amazing. I'm not sure what this adventure would be like without having this outlet.

I can scarcely imagine how hard it must have been to begin this conversation in the forum, with no idea whether the response would be positive, negative or 'meh'. I would like to think that the positive response was a foregone conclusion but in some things I'm pessimistic. You have lightened up our lives. We have enjoyed your joys and shared your disappointments vicariously and we are the better for it. I shed a tear at the thought of your son quietly crying in the back seat of the car, and another at his going to sleep in his brother's bed, and I do so again writing this. You encapsulated the pathos and the beauty of those moments.

 

I don't know what MIDN Basketballer meant when he said 'Be Happy', but the implicit love in that murmured statement was clear. Don't presume that he has seen through you, neither assume that he hasn't. That will become clear. Just let things play out as they will. Hugs, big time!

[+ sniper]

I'm quite possibly overthinking. When I came out to my younger sister(when I was 35) I assumed she already knew, yet she insists she had no clue. To be fair, I'm almost pathologically shy with new people so me never having a girlfriend wasn't the same red flag it is for others.

[BasketBaller]

I can scarcely imagine how hard it must have been to begin this conversation in the forum, with no idea whether the response would be positive, negative or 'meh'.

Well, I kind of eased into it unexpectedly, by posting I had seen one of my sons' teachers in a RentMen ad, escorting. That thread got moved to the Politics and Religion forum because of comments made about their school, but the topic of being a single father exploring my sexuality had been brought up with some very kind and supportive comments. It felt good to talk about it, although cautiously at first for the very reason you mention, I wasn't sure what the reactions would be.

 

I don't know what MIDN Basketballer meant when he said 'Be Happy', but the implicit love in that murmured statement was clear. Don't presume that he has seen through you, neither assume that he hasn't. That will become clear. Just let things play out as they will. Hugs, big time!

I will, and thank you.

[+ Oliver]

Dear BB -

Thank you for posting this saga. It has brought back memories of launching two daughters and a son on their college careers, although my wife was still here when that happened. I can remember sitting in the parking lot after leaving them, waiting 'til I could see to drive. And they all survived and are wonderful productive members of society! We did a good job! As have you!

And thanks to all the compassionate members of this forum who have commented - I am glad to be part of it.

Later on you will find you can begin to enjoy the "other" benefits of this site! (And do consider joining us in Palm Springs in April, 2018 - I would love to meet you, as would many others.)

Edited July 1, 2017 by Oliver

[BasketBaller]

Later on you will find you can begin to enjoy the "other" benefits of this site!

Well. I have enjoyed some of the other benefits already, having taken advantage of feedback and reviews! But that may be a more frequent enjoyment in future. In anay case, thank you!

[rvwnsd]

I thought of you several times during IML when I walked down this street in Chicago.

http://i1305.photobucket.com/albums/s545/WmClarke/IMG_2620_zpsulxdmut5.jpg

 

Such exciting times--to send them out on their own. Thanks for sharing!

@BasketBaller, I've enjoyed following the serial of your boys' journey toward first-time separation and your journey toward having an empty nest. Until @WmClarke posted this picture, it hadn't completely registered that one of your sons is attending DePaul. I started my college career at DePaul. It is a very good school, particularly in the areas of Business, Computer Science, and Theatre. For me, Loyola was a better fit and so in my junior year, I transferred there. Nonetheless, he made an excellent choice. DePaul has done a very good job of integrating itself into the greater Chicagoland community. Unlike other urban universities that built walled-off islands, DePaul has built campuses that blend into the neighborhood. To me, it makes for a rich experience. I hope he enjoys this new chapter. I also hope you take advantage of the opportunity to visit him and experience what a beautiful city Chicago is.

 

EDIT: The building depicted in @WmClarke's picture was a neglected former department store before DePaul renovated it into classrooms and a bookstore. They've done an excellent job of re-purposing existing buildings while expanding their Loop campus. When I attended Loyola, the joke was that DePaul was known for its basketball team, but we were known for our transplant programs. (LU has a medical school and at the time ran a hospital) Now, DePaul's preservation of historic and meaningful architecture is as well-known as its sports team.

Edited July 2, 2017 by rvwnsd

[BasketBaller]

@BasketBaller, I've enjoyed following the serial of your boys' journey toward first-time separation and your journey toward having an empty nest. Until @WmClarke posted this picture, it hadn't completely registered that one of your sons is attending DePaul. I started my college career at DePaul. It is a very good school, particularly in the areas of Business, Computer Science, and Theatre. For me, Loyola was a better fit and so in my junior year, I transferred there. Nonetheless, he made an excellent choice. DePaul has done a very good job of integrating itself into the greater Chicagoland community. Unlike other urban universities that built walled-off islands, DePaul has built campuses that blend into the neighborhood. To me, it makes for a rich experience. I hope he enjoys this new chapter. I also hope you take advantage of the opportunity to visit him and experience what a beautiful city Chicago is.

 

EDIT: The building depicted in @WmClarke's picture was a neglected former department store before DePaul renovated it into classrooms and a bookstore. They've done an excellent job of re-purposing existing buildings while expanding their Loop campus. When I attended Loyola, the joke was that DePaul was known for its basketball team, but we were known for our transplant programs. (LU has a medical school and at the time ran a hospital) Now, DePaul's preservation of historic and meaningful architecture is as well-known as its sports team.

I am very, very happy with his choice of DePaul. I occasionally go to Chicago on business anyway, and love the city. Every communication we've had with the university has been reassuring and promising. He's excited and so am I. I'll be in Chicago more often during the next four years and I know that will be a good thing.