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Posted
15 minutes ago, GordyLex said:

Savantsav was justified in writing his post regarding a failure to communicate. What I did not appreciate was being publicly shamed on the thread and called out after you and I spoke privately by text… totally unnecessary and inflammatory. Consequently I blocked all communication to prescient any further adversarial interactions.

I'm sorry, publicly shamed? I said what happened to the T. This is a forum to share these experiences with, none of what I said is inflammatory. I told you I appreciated your apologies but you could've said ANYTHING during the day to let me know you were sick or you could not make it. You didn't. You waited until *I* reached out to you asking what's up. That's completely unprofessional. I even told you I could not believe someone who was active on this forum could pull such an unprofessional move.

Posted (edited)

You also didn't post the beginning of our conversation, I wonder why. This isn't cool. We had set up a time, confirmed and discussed it several times up to the day before. I'm not publicly shaming, I'm calling out what happened. You see how you left me out to dry when I reached out asking if you had made it to LA? Did you know I checked your profile during the day and SAW YOU ONLINE? You completely blew me off.

 

 

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Edited by savantsav
Posted
3 minutes ago, savantsav said:

I'm sorry, publicly shamed? I said what happened to the T. This is a forum to share these experiences with, none of what I said is inflammatory. I told you I appreciated your apologies but you could've said ANYTHING during the day to let me know you were sick or you could not make it. You didn't. You waited until *I* reached out to you asking what's up. That's completely unprofessional. I even told you I could not believe someone who was active on this forum could pull such an unprofessional move.

I don’t understand why after you and I spoke you felt the need to then tag me in your post as if to summon me to defend myself. 

Posted (edited)
26 minutes ago, GordyLex said:

I don’t understand why after you and I spoke you felt the need to then tag me in your post as if to summon me to defend myself. 

So you could explain your side? That's what we're doing in this forum? We met here. We started chatting here. Did you expect people here wouldn't share the good and the bad? You stood me up, didn't even bother messaging me during the whole day/evening telling me you were sick, a booking we had been talking for months, that we had confirmed, that I had even offered an overnight after. I set up the time, I got the money, I prepared myself and you stood me up in incredibly unprofessional behavior, and I'M the one who fucked up? nahhhh.

Others here should know that even with a confirmed appointment you might blow them off without even telling them. That's what this forum is about, sharing these experiences. If you have an issue with unprofessional behavior being called out... then be a professional?

Edited by savantsav
Posted (edited)

jeez, I hate to see all this silly drama in the forum......he said he said......it appears Gordy was sincerely apologetic (see the texts) and Savant was evidently very psyched for the meeting......I have my own opinions on all this, but this episode doesn't involve me.....it's great to have providers like Gordy participate in COM and I hope we don't lose him....there are several providers who offer(ed) great commentary here, but many (Benjamin Nicholas evidently being a recent one) give up and leave....various good and not-so-good reasons for their departure, of course, but it's scenes like this thread that have contributed to many providers having a dim view of COM..... 

Edited by azdr0710
Posted
35 minutes ago, DMICS said:

The tagging part I get and that makes no sense, but otherwise I see nothing wrong in the post. 

My rationale for the tag was to give him an opportunity to give his side. Otherwise to me it would've felt like I was talking behind someone's back. Agreed with everything else.

Posted (edited)

I understand how frustrating it must have been for @savantsav to be stood up, regardless of what the reason was. However, things happen, and from your text exchanges with Gordy, I can see how apologetic he was that he couldn't make it to your date due to illness. Honestly, this in another way proves that Gordy is a genuine and sincere person, which is unfortunately not so common among providers and clients alike. I also understand that @savantsavwould like to give his honest opinion, which is one of the many reasons why CoM exists. Instead of tagging Gordy in your post, @savantsav could also characterize it as an unfortunate event that Gordy appeared profoundly apologetic for, and while this might be frustrating, you wish him the best or hope to see him again soon. Given Gordy's attitude in your text exchanges, Gordy might think this is something you guys could solve in private, and this post of yours may trigger his defense mechanism. 

As someone who has been stood up, racially discriminated, and body shamed by providers, we need honest clients like @savantsavand genuine providers like Gordy. Before this post gets locked by moderators, maybe all of us should move on from this incident for the better. 

ps. When you are sick and take medication like Tylenol PM, which helps you sleep, you may be knocked out for the entire day and hence not able to function in any way. That's my life in the last two weeks. 

Edited by GLEE
Posted
2 hours ago, savantsav said:

So you could explain your side? That's what we're doing in this forum? We met here. We started chatting here. Did you expect people here wouldn't share the good and the bad? You stood me up, didn't even bother messaging me during the whole day/evening telling me you were sick, a booking we had been talking for months, that we had confirmed, that I had even offered an overnight after. I set up the time, I got the money, I prepared myself and you stood me up in incredibly unprofessional behavior, and I'M the one who fucked up? nahhhh.

Others here should know that even with a confirmed appointment you might blow them off without even telling them. That's what this forum is about, sharing these experiences. If you have an issue with unprofessional behavior being called out... then be a professional?

I took the time to sincerely express my regret and shame, and offer to right a wrong. I was empathetic to your feelings and really made an effort to understand how you were feeling.

 

I explained to you clearly why there was radio silence on my end — I wish you could’ve been empathetic to what I was dealing with (I don’t owe anyone any detailed explanation, but a medical emergency). Clearly something serious happened given the months of planning and sudden radio silence. 

 

I wholeheartedly agree with you reporting on what happened. I don’t dispute that at all. Don’t kid anyone: you didn’t tag me to get a fair and balanced report. You wanted to put me on blast. 

Posted
4 minutes ago, GordyLex said:

I took the time to sincerely express my regret and shame, and offer to right a wrong. I was empathetic to your feelings and really made an effort to understand how you were feeling.

 

I explained to you clearly why there was radio silence on my end — I wish you could’ve been empathetic to what I was dealing with (I don’t owe anyone any detailed explanation, but a medical emergency). Clearly something serious happened given the months of planning and sudden radio silence. 

 

I wholeheartedly agree with you reporting on what happened. I don’t dispute that at all. Don’t kid anyone: you didn’t tag me to get a fair and balanced report. You wanted to put me on blast. 

You had the whole day to let me know. I messaged you at 8am asking if you had made it to LA. You didn’t answer. I texted again already at 10:40PM asking what’s up saying hopefully you’re good and sound and THAT’s when you replied to me finally saying you had been sick. You know you could’ve messaged me at any time throughout the day to let me know. That’s the professional thing to do.
 

You want me to be empathetic about you being sick but there’s no empathy with my time. A reply to my 8am text “Sorry I’m sick can we move?” Would’ve have been the RIGHT and professional thing to do. Not wait until I text YOU again late in the evening for you to finally tell me you’re sick. 
 

and I put you on “blast” by…. coming to this thread and sharing the experience? Tagged you so you could provide your side?

That’s putting you on blast?

If this is an industry or business you want to be in, being professional by respecting people’s time is Escorting 101. I’m done with this conversation. Others should know to be mindful how you can just blow them off without a warning even after having confirmed. 

Posted
30 minutes ago, GLEE said:

ps. When you are sick and take medication like Tylenol PM, which helps you sleep, you may be knocked out for the entire day and hence not able to function in any way. That's my life in the last two weeks.

You can text people before you take the Tylenol PM. Takes 10 seconds. I had already texted him, only need the reply and if he was feeling better in the evening to reply to my text at 10:40PM he could've done it before. He didn't. He didn't care enough to make sure his clients knew he could not meet them. If I hadn't texted him twice asking he would've not reached out.

Guest MikeThomas
Posted

I wish I had "This Topic is Closed" authority.  Gordy, please come to Dallas.

Posted

Sorry to hear this happened to you @savantsav - each of us responds to things like this in different ways.   It evidently caused you hurt, and for whatever reason, it is still affecting you.  As an objective bystander, I believe the texts that @GordyLex sent you indicate a deep regret for what happened.  He clearly wants to take responsibility for this, which says a lot.  No excuses were given, but he provided an explanation that is completely plausible.  I hope his words ring true to you and that you can move past this.  @GordyLex sounds like he is a pretty thoughtful and self-aware guy, which can be rare to find in today's society.   I'm sure I would have been extremely disappointed not to meet him as well, if that had been me, but I think we always need to make room for grace, and to extend that grace even when we feel we've been slighted.  Just my thoughts for what they might be worth.

Posted
4 minutes ago, CuriousByNature said:

Sorry to hear this happened to you @savantsav - each of us responds to things like this in different ways.   It evidently caused you hurt, and for whatever reason, it is still affecting you.  As an objective bystander, I believe the texts that @GordyLex sent you indicate a deep regret for what happened.  He clearly wants to take responsibility for this, which says a lot.  No excuses were given, but he provided an explanation that is completely plausible.  I hope his words ring true to you and that you can move past this.  @GordyLex sounds like he is a pretty thoughtful and self-aware guy, which can be rare to find in today's society.   I'm sure I would have been extremely disappointed not to meet him as well, if that had been me, but I think we always need to make room for grace, and to extend that grace even when we feel we've been slighted.  Just my thoughts for what they might be worth.

I am extremely appreciative of your compassion, thoughtfulness, and rationality. ❤️❤️❤️

Posted
2 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

Sorry to hear this happened to you @savantsav - each of us responds to things like this in different ways.   It evidently caused you hurt, and for whatever reason, it is still affecting you.  As an objective bystander, I believe the texts that @GordyLex sent you indicate a deep regret for what happened.  He clearly wants to take responsibility for this, which says a lot.  No excuses were given, but he provided an explanation that is completely plausible.  I hope his words ring true to you and that you can move past this.  @GordyLex sounds like he is a pretty thoughtful and self-aware guy, which can be rare to find in today's society.   I'm sure I would have been extremely disappointed not to meet him as well, if that had been me, but I think we always need to make room for grace, and to extend that grace even when we feel we've been slighted.  Just my thoughts for what they might be worth.

I had exited this conversation but since you tagged me, Thank you for acknowledging it. Of course it hurt me, I had to prepare physically, biologically, emotionally, financially, etc for us to have a good time and being ghosted is very hurtful. It was uncalled for and very unprofessional. 
 

Yes, I accepted his apology but doesn’t make what happen any less real. I share here these experiences because I am looking out for all of us. We here keep eyes out for the druggies, the scammers, the violent ones and the irresponsible/unprofessional ones. I don’t want any of you to feel the same way. 
 

As for grace, that’s what I was doing this morning when I went to check when he was gonna leave town but he had blocked me 🤷‍♂️ He has my number if he wants to turn the page and restart things, I have changed reviews/opinions before but first impressions are everything in what we do. 

Posted (edited)
7 hours ago, savantsav said:

I had exited this conversation but since you tagged me, Thank you for acknowledging it. Of course it hurt me, I had to prepare physically, biologically, emotionally, financially, etc for us to have a good time and being ghosted is very hurtful. It was uncalled for and very unprofessional. 
 

Yes, I accepted his apology but doesn’t make what happen any less real. I share here these experiences because I am looking out for all of us. We here keep eyes out for the druggies, the scammers, the violent ones and the irresponsible/unprofessional ones. I don’t want any of you to feel the same way. 
 

As for grace, that’s what I was doing this morning when I went to check when he was gonna leave town but he had blocked me 🤷‍♂️ He has my number if he wants to turn the page and restart things, I have changed reviews/opinions before but first impressions are everything in what we do. 

No need to thank me at all - feelings are feelings, and they hit each of us differently.  Only you yourself know the amount of preparation you invested, and none of us have a right to judge you on that or diminish what that means for you.  And it doesn't sound like @GordyLex judges you on that either.  Perhaps the DMs on this forum could be a place for the two of you to come to an understanding, separate from the observations and comments of all of us onlookers?  Just a thought, anyway.  You both sound like reasonable guys, and it would be a shame to miss an opportunity to soothe the soreness each of you might be feeling.  :)

 

 

Edited by CuriousByNature
Posted
9 hours ago, savantsav said:

You can text people before you take the Tylenol PM. Takes 10 seconds. I had already texted him, only need the reply and if he was feeling better in the evening to reply to my text at 10:40PM he could've done it before. He didn't. He didn't care enough to make sure his clients knew he could not meet them. If I hadn't texted him twice asking he would've not reached out.

This is my last response: I am sick of the baseless assumptions by @savantsav about my intent or capacity to reach out. 
 

“He could’ve done it before.” Seriously? You have no idea what I was going through. Don’t assume mal intent or willful, purposeful neglect. Don’t pretend as if you know what I was dealing with that day and that I was intentionally cavalier. 

I don’t have to specify what emergency prevented me from reaching out, why I was unavailable by phone for a majority of the day, but there’s a reason you didn’t hear back from me until over 12 hrs from your initial 8 AM inquiry. And as to why you didn’t hear from me before 8 AM? Well, @GLEE actually was pretty close to guessing what transpired: next time my nurse starts rapidly pushing midazolam in my IV in the ER I’m going to say “wait, stop! I need to message @savantsav first!!!” 

i am saddened that after my heartfelt and genuine messages to you, you continue to believe and assume I was operating from a place of ill will or intentional carelessness and malice. 

Don’t assume the worst in people. It’s a heavy and draining way to operate in life. Give people the benefit of the doubt and I think you’ll find life is a bit sweeter, richer, and full of joy and levity. 

to all the outsiders looking in at this thread who showed support and understanding, thank you. It means a lot to have your support while someone assumed the worst in me while I was undergoing one of the scariest things of my life. 

Posted (edited)

Getting pulled on this as I keep getting tagged. 
 

Sorry you went through all that but I don’t believe you had no way to let me know you couldn’t make it. You showed online on RM throughout the day and how convenient that when I texted you at 10:40pm then is when you could reply to me, in here you shared our screenshots but conveniently left out the ones where I’m texting you, all very sus behavior. You were cavalier with my feelings. 
 

Stop tagging me here, what you did was done and TL;DR for those in the future landing here. Never give him a deposit and make sure you have a plan b in place in case he flakes and won’t tell you

Edited by savantsav
Posted
9 minutes ago, savantsav said:

Getting pulled on this as I keep getting tagged. 
 

Sorry you went through all that but I don’t believe you had no way to let me know you couldn’t make it. You showed online on RM throughout the day and how convenient that when I texted you at 10:40pm then is when you could reply to me. You were cavalier with my feelings. 
 

Stop tagging me here, what you did was done and TL;DR for those in the future landing here. Never give him a deposit and make sure you have a plan b in place in case he flakes and won’t tell you

@savantsavI never asked for a deposit from you and I never ask clients for deposits!?!? What happened to me wasn’t my fault, but it was my responsibility to rectify how it impacted you. The record shows my good faith efforts. The record shows your assumptions and choice to see ill intent where it doesn’t exist. 

Posted (edited)

I didn’t say you asked me for one, I said to people in the future to not give you one because you might flake on them. 
 

Again, I’m sorry about what happened to you, but I do not believe you had no way to reply for over 12hrs and it was only when I texted again late in the evening when conveniently you were waking up from your IV and was able to reply. You were not going to reach out on your own.  
 

There’s nothing at this point you can say that’ll make me believe you couldn’t so we’ll agree to disagree on that. 
 

That’s it, stop tagging me. I’m moving on. 

Edited by savantsav
Posted
45 minutes ago, savantsav said:

Getting pulled on this as I keep getting tagged. 

You started this by tagging the provider after you guys spoke off-site, no? 
 

By that action alone you were provoking drama and confrontation in this thread. Can’t throw rocks and now retreat when the heat is on lol. 

Posted

I tagged him so he could come defend himself. Wasn’t just gonna talk behind his back. 
 

and I can stay here allllll you all want. We already got to the root that I do not believe he couldn’t reach out. That’s it. Anything else you or anyone else wants to add? We can keep going in circles. 

Posted (edited)

Also to everyone that reached out to me privately here, by text, by RM messenger, and to those that came to my aid I am so overwhelmed by the love and support especially while I’m still healing.

 

If we ever meet as client and provider I will show you just how grateful I am 😈🤤🥵

Edited by GordyLex
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