Sexpectations vs reality

[Guest]

This has been on my mind: I was very much in the closet trying to force myself to be straight; i'd never tried anything with another man. When I finally came out, I had lots of things I wanted to try! Lots of expectations about what I wanted.

this thread is for how our SExpectations were met by or let down by reality.

[Guest]

Oral - I'd seen plenty of porn with guys sucking. When I tried it myself, I found I couldn't deep throat so easily like in porn. It took some "training." And the tip of the penis is surprisingly soft in your mouth, and I discovered I like to please just the tip for this reason.

[Guest]

Anal - I didn't know about "cleaning out," so when I started myself out on dildos, I found it very uncomfortable and thought anal wasn't for me. Then when a friend instructed me to by a douche and clean out, my eyes were opened. Anal is amazing!

[Guest]

Semen - the idea of eating cum is really hot. But I find that I have to NOT cum first before my partner. If I do, post-nut-clarity tells me, "Semen is gross..." So I gotta please my man first so I'm still hot for his cum.

[Guest]

Topping - topping seems like a cardio exercise for me sometimes haha. Maybe it's because I'm a little chubby (dad-bod-chubby), but topping gets me sweaty and breathing heavy and in need of taking little breathers or else going consistently slower. Porn doesn't give that away at all. It looks steamy, but the actual exertion doesn't seem so bad with rock-hard porn-bodies.

[Guest]

Bigger ≠ Better - I've been topped by some very big penises... I found that the length/girth/size doesn't do much for me if the top doesn't have technique. If he thinks "pound town" is the way to go with that extra length, usually it just hurts and feels stretching, and the "spots" that I want hit are neglected 😭 the best sex I've had was with average penis size.

[Guest]

One more came to mind.
Receiving oral sex.

Porn makes it look so amazing. But then I discovered I actually don't care for being sucked. I've only had two guys in my life do it really, really well

[+ Charlie]

The idea of getting fucked always seemed exciting. The actuality usually felt like work.

[pubic_assistance]

11 hours ago, Angel-Ayy said:

this thread is for how our SExpectations were met by or let down by reality.

I was actually pretty experienced with girls in High School and College by the time I went with my first dude. I wasn't 100% sure what to expect but I jumped in with both feet when I finally met someone who was my type.

[MaybeMaybeNot]

1. Being with a hot guy equates into hot sex. I have had many great sexcapades with guys who looked nothing like David Anthony or Stu from Sean Cody. There are many ways for guys to be hot. 
 

2. When I have a partner, I will have sex regularly, and I won’t need to be on the hunt. Ha. Ha. Ha. 

[Guest]

5 minutes ago, MaybeMaybeNot said:

1. Being with a hot guy equates into hot sex. I have had many great sexcapades with guys who looked nothing like David Anthony or Stu from Sean Cody. There are many ways for guys to be hot. 
 

2. When I have a partner, I will have sex regularly, and I won’t need to be on the hunt. Ha. Ha. Ha. 

I have had a couple of very attractive partners… And it really was some of the worst sex. If I were to psychoanalyze, I would pause it that because they knew that they were so handsome, they didn't think they had to try very hard on the sexual front.

some of the WORST sex I ever had was with a guy who talked himself up a lot before we did it. He said that he was an expert in bed. He knew how to please a bottom. Knew how to hit all the right spots. What a fool he was. The sex was shit.

 

as for being partnered, I had a different thread about that because my husband and I are negotiating things. He can go long time without sex and be fine. I still masturbate sometimes up to four times a day. I got a lot of hormones and a lot of semen 😂

[CuriousByNature]

8 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

 I jumped in with both feet when I finally met someone who was my type.

Wow, that's pretty advanced for a first time.  Was he even able to walk afterwards?

[Luv2play]

On 2/1/2025 at 12:33 PM, Charlie said:

The idea of getting fucked always seemed exciting. The actuality usually felt like work.

I agree but it’s always been a labour of love for me. 

[jeezifonly]

I’m, in many ways, grateful that I didn’t dive head first into the full range of sexual activity. having been in a M/F relationship for years my understanding of the sexual terrain of the male body needed time. The very first time I was with a man, (who was likely on the DL) I swallowed 3 times. I didn’t enjoy anything anal for about a year. I always encourage anyone to spend solo time with their ass before engaging with a male partner the first time. Once you make friends, it’s a friend for life. 🍑

[CuriousByNature]

39 minutes ago, jeezifonly said:

II always encourage anyone to spend solo time with their ass before engaging with a male partner the first time. Once you make friends, it’s a friend for life. 🍑

[jeezifonly]

14 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

Hairy ass is the best. 😍

[Guest]

1 hour ago, jeezifonly said:

Hairy ass is the best. 😍

I wasn't into hairy until recently. Now... 🤤🤤

[CuriousByNature]

8 hours ago, Angel-Ayy said:

I wasn't into hairy until recently. Now... 🤤🤤

Hopefully it was before I posted that GIF 🤣

Edited February 4 by CuriousByNature

[Guest]

3 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

Hopefully it was before I posted that GIF 🤣

A gentleman wouldn't ask 😘😏😂

[Guest]

3 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

Hopefully it was before I posted that GIF 🤣

In reality, though, I think I know the exact moment I decided I liked hairy.

I haven't been on social media for very long. I avoided it. But in 2022, I buckled and got an Instagram. Started following a bunch of models and content creators and pages that compile both of the above.

And this gentleman was the first genuinely hairy guy that I saw where the hair made me salivate.

Sᗩᒪᕮᕼ ᕼᕮᒪᗩᒪᗩT (@helalatofficial) • Instagram photos and videos

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4,654 likes, 76 comments - helalatofficial on November 20, 2022: "Good Night Everyone ✨".

 

[ICTJOCK]

I think it's very fair to say that as a provider,  my "sexpectations"  have been exceeded by reality.    I rarely have letdowns and what I have learned and experienced is far greater than what I would have expected.   No complaints.      Sure,  you can have a disappointment with a client, but use that to learn.

[Nightowl]

Having a cock in my ass always sounded hot as hell but the reality turned out to be painful.  I invariably go limp when he’s pounding away.  I realize I prefer some playful anal touch with probing digital penetration but don’t really want to take in the whole sausage.

[Guest]

3 hours ago, Nightowl said:

Having a cock in my ass always sounded hot as hell but the reality turned out to be painful.  I invariably go limp when he’s pounding away.  I realize I prefer some playful anal touch with probing digital penetration but don’t really want to take in the whole sausage.

I respect that anal sex does not give you enjoyment… But it does make me sad that this is the case. Some of the most ecstatic pleasures that I have ever felt were because of a penis in my butt 😂😭

[Guest]

8 hours ago, ICTJOCK said:

I think it's very fair to say that as a provider,  my "sexpectations"  have been exceeded by reality.    I rarely have letdowns and what I have learned and experienced is far greater than what I would have expected.   No complaints.      Sure,  you can have a disappointment with a client, but use that to learn.

I'm curious, what kind of lessons have you learned from the more unsatisfactory sexual encounters?

[Nightowl]

On 2/8/2025 at 6:33 PM, Angel-Ayy said:

I respect that anal sex does not give you enjoyment… But it does make me sad that this is the case. Some of the most ecstatic pleasures that I have ever felt were because of a penis in my butt 😂😭

Maybe I just need a good prostate orgasm to change my mind.