I wish dudes would stop lying to us, and more importantly themselves

[Jarrod_Uncut]

Dude claiming to have contacted me today for just an inquiry 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

Then later he’s talking about: 

 

 

Meanwhile, I’m being made out to seem like I’m crazy despite what others saying 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

 

I’m just at a point, I’m tired of this shit. I don’t have time for childish, insincere, indecisive, inconsiderate, uncooperative, unreliable…list goes on.
 

To make it so bad, this person actually booked me ONCE before. So it’s like, he should already know the drill. Why not just ask me out like a NORMAL FUCKING PERSON and book a session, or say: hey Jarrod I am coming to xxx and want to book for xxx date.

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 🤦🏾‍♂️ take the wheel. I am going back to charging $10-$20 to be contacted for “inquiries” again, effective tonight. I’ve wasted my time 3 times already in the last 24 hours dealing with nonsense like this. Some of these clients out here think we are a free conversation piece and expect us to sit around and wait for them to make decisions with no sort of commitment. As if I have nothing better to do with my life, than to wait on them to “possibly” get back to me. 
 

This is another reason I can’t wait to get out of my current market (full of flaky, indecisive dudes who love to harass escorts as free entertainment and MIGHT book IF and only IF they get to waste your time a few times over a course of a couple years, and have the patience of a saint to not go off or block them 🤦🏾‍♂️ , but I find this is a big American issue almost everywhere. I’m also writing a letter to rentmen and RentMasseur asking if they can start charging clients to contact/get our number. So when it happens, you can thank me later 🎤 ✌A deposit isn’t enough. These people need to go thru 3rd party or pay before reaching us. The ease of them to bullshit and play games is way out of control. 

Edited November 3, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[+ nycman]

[Jarrod_Uncut]

37 minutes ago, nycman said:

I’m just over the mixed messages. They try to sugar coat it by saying they only made an inquiry and didn’t book a time. When in reality they asked for an appointment, but didn’t hold up their end of it. Simple as that.

 

It doesn’t take making a time/place, etc (which as you can see, was done with other providers and still fell thru). I can understand an inquiry just looking at pics and asking a question. But a late night text asking if I can come to his hotel is a solicitation for something taking place. If they don’t think much of it, they’re a piece of shit. 

It’s like, if that person didn’t want the booking: why even go out your way to contact and invite me? That is just so tacky. It’s delusional to “line me up” by making an inquiry and then claim to have no intent to follow thru on it. 

Edited November 3, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[TT3690]

Sounds frustrating, but I would never pay up front just to inquire- guys can be very flaky on the provider end as well and when no one else does it, it looks suspicious. If it's worth not dealing with time wasters that's your decision, but you might be shooting yourself in the foot there.

[Guest]

 

"I wish dudes would stop lying to us, and more importantly themselves"

My man, let's not forget that it's allegedly the world's oldest profession...  all the wishing in the world 🌎 isn't going to change human behavior... however,  you can completely control how you respond, don't respond, how you navigate to make it work for you..  at least for me, it has to be fun or I simply do not do it. We've all  navigated in our respective profession through numerous calamities, recessions, polarizing political regime changes, wars, global pandemics these have been issues affecting both sides of the fence however though effort and attitude we keep moving forward and with success.  Sometimes the best thing we can do is get out of our own way... I'm constantly examining and reexamining my methods, when im stuck I reach out to my voices of reason. I'm on your side, I don't know you but I still want you to win, be happy and be successful. 
 

D 

[blck37]

2 hours ago, TT3690 said:

Sounds frustrating, but I would never pay up front just to inquire- guys can be very flaky on the provider end as well and when no one else does it, it looks suspicious. If it's worth not dealing with time wasters that's your decision, but you might be shooting yourself in the foot there.

He is hustling hard, and i can respect that.

But notwithstanding, I will have to second this view. In a world where majority providers wont or cant provide full and clear information on their service upfront (eg some dont list their rate, or put 'ask me' or do not provide enough info on their 'do and donts'), and now clients are expected to pay just to get that information? Or to check their availability? Hm.....

[Guest]

9 minutes ago, blck37 said:

eg some dont list their rate, or put 'ask me' or do not provide enough info on their 'do and donts'), and now clients are expected to pay just to get that information? Or to check their availability? Hm.....

For whatever it's worth I've NEVER listed my rates or listed my phone number and it's had zero negative impact on my being able to successfully fill my dance card in any major cites, none of the above are necessary to be successful when dealing with conspicuous consumers. And expecting to be paid for information???? That's just insane and would never for a minute cross my mind. Once again, I can only speak for myself and my own experience over a long and wonderful course of time. 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

5 hours ago, TT3690 said:

Sounds frustrating, but I would never pay up front just to inquire- guys can be very flaky on the provider end as well and when no one else does it, it looks suspicious. If it's worth not dealing with time wasters that's your decision, but you might be shooting yourself in the foot there.

Too late, I’ve already updated my website and gone ahead and gone back to requiring $20 to book a consultation for inquiries. I did it earlier this year and it went okay, but going into the holidays where the psycho bullshitters really come out, I’m not hesitating for another day. 

2 hours ago, Vin_Marco said:

For whatever it's worth I've NEVER listed my rates or listed my phone number and it's had zero negative impact on my being able to successfully fill my dance card in any major cites, none of the above are necessary to be successful when dealing with conspicuous consumers. And expecting to be paid for information???? That's just insane and would never for a minute cross my mind. Once again, I can only speak for myself and my own experience over a long and wonderful course of time. 

This is my thing: the information is already posted. My rates are already on my website, what they need to know is also there, pics/dick size etc etc. it’s nothing more information they need other than, “Should I send the deposit on cash app, Venmo or your website” and “this is what I want to get into”. Anything else is just dragging stuff out.

And the reason WHY in this particular case I was not having it is because, the area of town this guy was in: I was just in that area  shopping and had killed several minutes waiting for another client to confirm. Other client confirms and sends deposit but then immediately has to cancel. But where I stay is a good trek from that area. I’m basically telling him: if you want to meet tonight, I need to know soon. Because once I leave that area of town and head home, I won’t be able to get back up there the same night because it’s too far.

Thats like you being in Los Angeles, and having some client tell you he’s interested when you’re about to be headed to Palm Springs. But then takes forever to confirm. And like clockwork, you get back to Palm Springs and he’s like, “R u still available in LA 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

On top of that, there’s more to the story. Like I said before, he’s contacted and met me once previously last year. So no need for him to be acting dumb like he needs more information. 
 

And this is a message I already told him all the info he needs:

 

Now…he never texted or responded back after that message when I said I’d be available in St. Louis. Now he wants to text me 10 months later and book a visit like I wouldn’t remember:

And the only reason he even got the chance to get a reply from me, is because I seen our previous texts. It wasn’t until after he started BSing that I referenced his number and showed he’s ripped off scheduling other providers as well. 
 

So it’s not just about paying to be asking for information. I don’t have the capacity to be dealing with nonsense people, nor do I think it’s right that I’m sitting around answering all these texts and not even getting paid minimum wage for it. RentMen isn’t our employer. I have bills getting backed up, because I have a whole phone feed full of messages from piece of shit guys like him, who never manage to book an appointment. I don’t have time for that anymore. 

THAT is why I am starting to require paying to get info. And I’m glad you’re able to still meet good clients out there with your strategy, but not every place is the same and not every person is treated the same. People just have to recognize inequality in the sex work industry and ACKNOWLEDGE it, period. It doesn’t have to go into politics or race, but just recognize there’s inequality in the business.
 

Some clients may treat other providers differently, than perhaps someone like yourself. You may attract a better clientele by not showing your number, than someone who’s client base is looking for quick big dicks, without any hurdles (aka, texting and not paying a deposit, and getting to flake whenever they feel like it). 

Edited November 3, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[jeezifonly]

😁

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

Too late, I’ve already updated my website and gone ahead and gone back to requiring $20 to book a consultation for inquiries. I did it earlier this year and it went okay, but going into the holidays where the psycho bullshitters really come out, I’m not hesitating for another day. 

This is my thing: the information is already posted. My rates are already on my website, what they need to know is also there, pics/dick size etc etc. it’s nothing more information they need other than, “Should I send the deposit on cash app, Venmo or your website” and “this is what I want to get into”. Anything else is just dragging stuff out.

And the reason WHY in this particular case I was not having it is because, the area of town this guy was in: I was just in that area  shopping and had killed several minutes waiting for another client to confirm. Other client confirms and sends deposit but then immediately has to cancel. But where I stay is a good trek from that area. I’m basically telling him: if you want to meet tonight, I need to know soon. Because once I leave that area of town and head home, I won’t be able to get back up there the same night because it’s too far.

Thats like you being in Los Angeles, and having some client tell you he’s interested when you’re about to be headed to Palm Springs. But then takes forever to confirm. And like clockwork, you get back to Palm Springs and he’s like, “R u still available in LA 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

On top of that, there’s more to the story. Like I said before, he’s contacted and met me once previously last year. So no need for him to be acting dumb like he needs more information. 
 

And this is a message I already told him all the info he needs:

 

Now…he never texted or responded back after that message when I said I’d be available in St. Louis. Now he wants to text me 10 months later and book a visit like I wouldn’t remember:

And the only reason he even got the chance to get a reply from me, is because I seen our previous texts. It wasn’t until after he started BSing that I referenced his number and showed he’s ripped off scheduling other providers as well. 
 

So it’s not just about paying to be asking for information. I don’t have the capacity to be dealing with nonsense people, nor do I think it’s right that I’m sitting around answering all these texts and not even getting paid minimum wage for it. RentMen isn’t our employer. I have bills getting backed up, because I have a whole phone feed full of messages from piece of shit guys like him, who never manage to book an appointment. I don’t have time for that anymore. 

THAT is why I am starting to require paying to get info. And I’m glad you’re able to still meet good clients out there with your strategy, but not every place is the same and not every person is treated the same. People just have to recognize inequality in the sex work industry and ACKNOWLEDGE it, period. It doesn’t have to go into politics or race, but just recognize there’s inequality in the business.
 

Some clients may treat other providers differently, than perhaps someone like yourself. You may attract a better clientele by not showing your number, than someone who’s client base is looking for quick big dicks, without any hurdles (aka, texting and not paying a deposit, and getting to flake whenever they feel like it). 

I don't know what to tell you then mate. I hope you find peace and happiness and a system of doing pleasure that's profitable and  doesn't cause anguish. I sincerely mean that . 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

4 hours ago, Vin_Marco said:

I don't know what to tell you then mate. I hope you find peace and happiness and a system of doing pleasure that's profitable and  doesn't cause anguish. I sincerely mean that . 

I appreciate it and know you mean well. But there’s not necessarily much else to tell me lol. I made my decision, and of course with your help I can feel better that I don’t have to be FOMO about having my phone number available on RM.

I just feel at the end of the day, things are how they are for a reason. I find it ironic that on my own site, people get quicker to the point than those who send messages on RentMen. I come right from the start with what I offer, and what’s needed. I feel RentMen and some of these other sites, don’t do enough along each step to acknowledge that we’re not available for free. It shouldn’t be “do a bunch of work and then I’ll pay you after”. It should be, “I’m booking an Uber, where’s my credit card?” 
 

Nobody calls Pizza Hut and keep the person on the phone for 60 minutes, asking how big is the pizza, what’s it include, and then say “I’m not ready to eat yet”. That would be asinine.   
 

It’s no reason I should have to be asking friends for money (like I’ve had to do like 3-4 times last month) and then be sitting around answering texts day after day. Those people should be booking and paying the money they pretended they wanted to give me, in the first place.
 

If they aren’t ready to plan a visit or send a deposit when they contact me, there’s no reason I should have to do that for free, with no proof of it actually happening. All that does is leave the door open for them to be a flake, play some bullshit games and then act like they are so innocent…only to do it again and again down the line. 
 

Even though the client/escort pool is expansive, I find it’s often the same ones who come back around, playing the same game they played 2 years ago. The industry is actually smaller than it seems. 

[+ nycman]

5 hours ago, Vin_Marco said:

I hope you find peace and happiness and a system of doing pleasure that's profitable and  doesn't cause anguish. 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

4 hours ago, nycman said:

Jokes aside, I don’t feel we as providers need to run our ship 🚢 based on what people feel escorts SHOULD do, nor operate the same way, year after year. If someone wants to receive a nominal “honorarium” (pardon Vin for stealing your word lol) to arrange a session, by all means that’s their personal business. As long as they aren’t scamming or ripping anyone off, there should be no judgement.

Theres no rule in the escort Bible saying: “you must answer to all texts and phone calls before receiving payment, even if you have no idea they aren’t just wasting your time and playing the same game with 5 other escorts”. If someone can show me that, then I’ll reconsider it.

I feel I’ve done everything I needed to do. Sitting around and answering additional texts for free round the clock, is not one of them. And let’s face it, we’re not selling cars or homes and getting $10,000 commission checks. Like I said before, the pay isn’t enough to take on every client inquiry, unless every text inquiry that ever reached my phone, were certain to actually book. Which like you said; never gonna happen 🤷🏾‍♂️ 

Edited November 4, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Gandalf]

6 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

nd let’s face it, we’re not selling cars or homes and getting $10,000 commission checks.

No, but the fact is you are in the business of sales.  And anyone who's done sales knows the ratio misses to hits.  Leads take schmoozing, deals collapse at the last minute, the market is a cruel, hard, changeable bitch and there's always somebody who's going to compete.  I get that you're setting your limits but you sound frustrated as hell about things you really cannot change.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 11/4/2023 at 8:02 AM, Gandalf said:

No, but the fact is you are in the business of sales.  And anyone who's done sales knows the ratio misses to hits.  Leads take schmoozing, deals collapse at the last minute, the market is a cruel, hard, changeable bitch and there's always somebody who's going to compete.  I get that you're setting your limits but you sound frustrated as hell about things you really cannot change.

I understand that but, I don’t think our industry can be compared to that of the definition of “sales”. Many (not most, don’t quote me and I know there’s all levels and diversities of sales) sales jobs tend to be going after people who have no idea they want a product. 
 

The last “regular job” I had was in sales, and I left that for this. It was not at all similar. Clients contacted me, they wanted the product, I didn’t have to twist anyone’s arm, or sale some boring product/package (pun intended) I didn’t like, with a script and a bunch of quirky lines. Sales people also tend to have hours where they are dealing with that, and hours that they shut off. We never shut off. Clients will text/call us at all hours, in cases where we aren’t even in the position to converse with them at that moment. Then out of kindness, I’ll respond back, only to be met with dismissive, indecisive, unreliable behavior. Why. Why should I keep doing that for free? 

I wish I could think of something to compare our industry to, but I can’t at the moment. Uber/Lyft is probably the only modern day thing that has a direct comparison. But their business model is way different. The drivers don’t handle clients, the app handles everything for them. We don’t have that luxury. We place a ad, and have to basically run the entire ship 🛳️ from start to finish. Meanwhile RentMen just sits back and chill, while collecting our payments (no diss at them, but just stating the facts because they are simply an advertising platform). 

It’s not that I’m frustrated at the business (I know hard to believe) it’s just I want a different way of doing things. Yes there’s some frustration I’m always having to respond to “inquiries” at unpredictable times, only to deal with bullshit like above, and not even get paid for it. Yes, that is frustrating, who wouldn’t? Tell me someone who wouldn’t be frustrated after they waited 30 minutes at a gas station in their car, for a client to confirm: only for that client to then cancel and…AND say they are going to call someone else? You wouldn’t be frustrated? At 10:30 at night? And you live an hour away? 
 

This is why I decided it’s time to move to getting something for each “inquiry”. I’m asking $20 now, if I client wants to reach me. That’s not much to ask. That way I can get/share details and figure out if it’s something that can happen. But I can’t keep doing that all day everyday, just to hear one excuse after the next after I volunteered my time. If they can’t do that, they probably just using my line for free entertainment or a bit of attention. 

Edited November 5, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Every escort when starting out needs to watch the 1992 film Glengarry Glen Ross.  Learn it.  Be able to quote it.

This business is, in essence, a sales job of building relationships.  It can be a very successful career for those who are closers.  

It's also a job for guys who can both quickly read and then deliver what clients want.

This can mean many things, many of which have ZERO to do with sex.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

3 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

Every escort when starting out needs to watch the 1992 film Glengarry Glen Ross.  Learn it.  Be able to quote it.

This business is, in essence, a sales job of building relationships.  It can be a very successful career for those who are closers.  

It's also a job for guys who can both quickly read and then deliver what clients want.

This can mean many things, many of which have ZERO to do with sex.

Thanks, I mean at the end of the day we are farmers 👨🏿‍🌾 selling bananas 🍌, eggplants🍆 and apples 🍎 lol. 
 

And I agree, it does take an ability to sell your package and deliver. Which I’m great at in person and once I know the client is genuine. heck just last weekend I was able to get the co-owner of a gay bar to invite me back to his place (well he invited me and was already interested, but I just facilitated it), and now he’s going to be booking me for an overnight next time I’m in town.

However, the issue is the initial riff raff of inquiries. Like I said, I’ve been in sales before and I know the need to be a “good sport” and not take things personal and be driven by emotions. But when an escort lives in area where people regularly disrespect sex workers, or conservative, unsafe, etc: A dude has to do, what a dude has to do. And in my case: I feel I can be a much better sales person if I only deal with CLIENTS, not “timewasters” and guys who think texting at 7 a.m. or telling you what hotel they’re in and if you’re available tonight, is just an inquiry that can be flaked on:

 

Edited November 5, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Guest]

3 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

Every escort when starting out needs to watch the 1992 film Glengarry Glen Ross.  Learn it.  Be able to quote it.

This business is, in essence, a sales job of building relationships.  It can be a very successful career for those who are closers.  

It's also a job for guys who can both quickly read and then deliver what clients want.

This can mean many things, many of which have ZERO to do with sex.

What he said 👆🏽 1000% 

[Your Man in Arlington]

5 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

It's also a job for guys who can both quickly read and then deliver what clients want.

This can mean many things, many of which have ZERO to do with sex.

IMHO, for some this is pure intuition or a specific form emotional intelligence, and they may not even know they specifically have it.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

1 hour ago, Your Man in Arlington said:

IMHO, for some this is pure intuition or a specific form emotional intelligence, and they may not even know they specifically have it.

Yes, and you know it can be a serious advantage in life when you recognize, harness and hone it.

[marylander1940]

On 11/3/2023 at 2:35 AM, Jarrod_Uncut said:

Dude claiming to have contacted me today for just an inquiry 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

Then later he’s talking about: 

 

 

Meanwhile, I’m being made out to seem like I’m crazy despite what others saying 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

 

 

I’m just at a point, I’m tired of this shit. I don’t have time for childish, insincere, indecisive, inconsiderate, uncooperative, unreliable…list goes on.
 

To make it so bad, this person actually booked me ONCE before. So it’s like, he should already know the drill. Why not just ask me out like a NORMAL FUCKING PERSON and book a session, or say: hey Jarrod I am coming to xxx and want to book for xxx date.

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus 🤦🏾‍♂️ take the wheel. I am going back to charging $10-$20 to be contacted for “inquiries” again, effective tonight. I’ve wasted my time 3 times already in the last 24 hours dealing with nonsense like this. Some of these clients out here think we are a free conversation piece and expect us to sit around and wait for them to make decisions with no sort of commitment. As if I have nothing better to do with my life, than to wait on them to “possibly” get back to me. 
 

This is another reason I can’t wait to get out of my current market (full of flaky, indecisive dudes who love to harass escorts as free entertainment and MIGHT book IF and only IF they get to waste your time a few times over a course of a couple years, and have the patience of a saint to not go off or block them 🤦🏾‍♂️ , but I find this is a big American issue almost everywhere. I’m also writing a letter to rentmen and RentMasseur asking if they can start charging clients to contact/get our number. So when it happens, you can thank me later 🎤 ✌A deposit isn’t enough. These people need to go thru 3rd party or pay before reaching us. The ease of them to bullshit and play games is way out of control. 

 

On 11/3/2023 at 2:56 AM, nycman said:

@Jarrod_Uncut if you're going to post a thread about every negative interaction you have with a potential client... Ghosting and flakiness happen in ALL professions and activities, it's part of life! 

 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

1 hour ago, marylander1940 said:

 

@Jarrod_Uncut if you're going to post a thread about every negative interaction you have with a potential client... Ghosting and flakiness happen in ALL professions and activities, it's part of life! 

 

I understand that but: I’m specifically talking about this profession. I know it happens elsewhere. By all means, I can go on any hookup app and experience that all day/everyday and think nothing of it. 
 

But we’re dealing with a different dynamic here. If I’m paying $$ to post on a site, I shouldn’t have to contend with the same level of flakiness as a free platform. And people have to do their part to acknowledge when they are coming off flaky, and be let known it’s not acceptable practice to do in the industry.

I mean, look at that guy. More than 1 providers saying he stood them up. I have to wonder if they have said anything to him at all, and if they did: why would he continue? And on top of that, to someone the client has met before.

We can keep making excuses for inconsiderate behavior, and relate to every other business: or we can at least address it and call it out when it happens. Many who behave that way, have no idea the inconvenience they may cause. I’m not saying ever interaction has to be an obligation to book: but people who know better and still do it: need to realize it’s unacceptable. 
 

And most specifically: I refer to the ones who: I respond to them, and they don’t reply back. And then a year later hit me back up trying to meet “today”. And when I reply back, they either don’t respond or do what the guy I mentioned does.

That’s not just being a ghost or a flake. That’s someone who lacks etiquette, and needs to be let known. Now, if they enjoy escorts getting upset with them and do it on purpose: they deserve to be on every report and blacklist available.

A First-time Client’s Guide to Escort Booking Etiquette

TRYST.LINK

---

The sex industry often feels mysterious to outsiders - full of rules and customs that aren’t...

The sex industry is rife with ‘time wasters and tyre-kickers’ - would-be clients who never follow through after contacting an escort. If you want your first attempt at booking to be successful, you’ll need to stand out as a serious customer.

Edited November 7, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Gandalf]

9 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

If I’m paying $$ to post on a site, I shouldn’t have to contend with the same level of flakiness as a free platform.

Why?

[+ DrownedBoy]

7 hours ago, Gandalf said:

Why?

Second that. I have a premium RM account as a provider,  and it doesn't stop little brats from screwing up appointments. 

[marylander1940]

48 minutes ago, DrownedBoy said:

Second that. I have a premium RM account as a provider,  and it doesn't stop little brats from screwing up appointments. 

That seems to be happening way often to you and other frequent posters. Is it because you tend to hire younger guys? 

I only had 1 no show since I got back to hiring after I got vaccinated in early 2021.