Do you believe the ones who call in sick the day of?

[Jarrod_Uncut]

I was going to bring this other the other day, but was like…whatever. However, this seems to be a common thing now especially with next day appointments. I know there may be some genuine circumstances of it happening, but this is becoming a recurring theme: I’ll get contacted for a booking, with I may not be available for right away. Try to plan for the next day, but then get a text in the morning that they’re either sick or someone been exposed so they might be exposed. 
 

Or get the ones who seem perfectly fine the day prior, but then today claim to have this or that ailment all of a sudden. One guy even told me earlier this week, he was in bed all day with strep throat, and it was only noon and he sent it in Adam4Adam. I’m almost sure that was a lie because, you don’t just “wake up” with strep throat. It’s something you have to get tested for, and if it’s that bad, generally it’s something he should have been feeling prior to that.

I know people try to be cautious and considerate and not pass anything on (BS, because people out here don’t even be wearing masks when they have a cough or sneeze), but I just have a hard time believing it sometimes. I’m pretty sure at least 3 people in the past couple months have lied about being sick when they really weren’t.

[MikeBiDude]

33 minutes ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

I was going to bring this other the other day, but was like…whatever. However, this seems to be a common thing now especially with next day appointments. I know there may be some genuine circumstances of it happening, but this is becoming a recurring theme: I’ll get contacted for a booking, with I may not be available for right away. Try to plan for the next day, but then get a text in the morning that they’re either sick or someone been exposed so they might be exposed. 
 

Or get the ones who seem perfectly fine the day prior, but then today claim to have this or that ailment all of a sudden. One guy even told me earlier this week, he was in bed all day with strep throat, and it was only noon and he sent it in Adam4Adam. I’m almost sure that was a lie because, you don’t just “wake up” with strep throat. It’s something you have to get tested for, and if it’s that bad, generally it’s something he should have been feeling prior to that.

I know people try to be cautious and considerate and not pass anything on (BS, because people out here don’t even be wearing masks when they have a cough or sneeze), but I just have a hard time believing it sometimes. I’m pretty sure at least 3 people in the past couple months have lied about being sick when they really weren’t.

This behavior does seem to have increased lately. But…I’ve experienced it also frequently from providers, it’s a two way street. Twice in the last few weeks two different providers both said “sorry, was getting ready for you and didn’t realize how bad my stomach ache was…”.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

1 hour ago, MikeBiDude said:

This behavior does seem to have increased lately. But…I’ve experienced it also frequently from providers, it’s a two way street. Twice in the last few weeks two different providers both said “sorry, was getting ready for you and didn’t realize how bad my stomach ache was…”.

Yeah, that does seem fishy. Two with the same excuse??

In my case, I was just talking with a client last night about what time to meet today. Then this morning texts me about someone from a party he went to last night, saying they tested positive this morning. It just seems mighty quick for that to happen.  But considering the person made partial deposit, I can’t say they aren’t telling the truth about it.

If this type of stuff continues, I’m eventually going to have to go above and beyond what I’m already doing: start doing like air bnb, and just getting the whole amount upfront before even scheduling anyone. That way if it gets cancelled unexpectedly the next day, that’s on them. 

[BuffaloKyle]

I'd honestly think 99% of the time if someone who made an appt the day before says they are now sick are lying. If it was made a few days to a week before I'd say more like 50/50. 

Makes me think of my personal life where I rarely call in sick to work, maybe once a year at the max, and I did go into work the one day pretty sick. I texted my boss that evening to say I wouldn't be in the following day. When I came back then everyone was all over me saying they thought I was in the hospital then or something since I never call in so they knew it had to be bad. 😅

But yeah that was years ago. Nowadays at my current job people call in every week because we can't replace them with how hard it is to find workers. This one guy's grandmother I swear has died 4 or 5 times. 😅

[+ KensingtonHomo]

I wonder how many of these people are new to hiring and get cold feet. We've been hiring for about 3 years now and I still get nervous about meeting a new guy. Now, of course, I realize it's just cold feet and go ahead with it. And with people who we see regularly I'm only even nervous about douching. 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

3 hours ago, BuffaloKyle said:

I'd honestly think 99% of the time if someone who made an appt the day before says they are now sick are lying. If it was made a few days to a week before I'd say more like 50/50. 

Makes me think of my personal life where I rarely call in sick to work, maybe once a year at the max, and I did go into work the one day pretty sick. I texted my boss that evening to say I wouldn't be in the following day. When I came back then everyone was all over me saying they thought I was in the hospital then or something since I never call in so they knew it had to be bad. 😅

But yeah that was years ago. Nowadays at my current job people call in every week because we can't replace them with how hard it is to find workers. This one guy's grandmother I swear has died 4 or 5 times. 😅

That’s what I’m saying. I guess some figure there’s no way around that, so what can I say. I wouldn’t even say cold feet, as much as probably juggling other contacts. 
 

Like how does someone just “conveniently” get sick the day were supposed to meet. Especially the ones with the Covid 3rd and 4th party stuff: a friend of a friend of a friend, tested positive. So now they have to cancel 🤦🏽‍♂️

[+ Charlie]

On a trip to NYC a number of years ago, I called a well-known escort and made a date for the following afternoon. However, during the night, I developed severe diarrhea and woke with a sore throat. I called him at 9am to explain that I was ill and would have to cancel. Then I checked out of the hotel and returned home to recuperate.

The next day I called from home to apologize again, and discovered that he had blocked calls from me. The next time I was in NYC, I called again, and found that calls from me were still blocked. I guess he didn't believe me. So I moved on to someone else, and I assume he had done the same.

[+ nycman]

I take people at their word.

It gives me less headaches.

If they’re a lying piece of shit…I’m glad a didn’t meet them.

It’s a Win-Win in my book. 

[Kevin Slater]

It's none of my business whether the excuse is true or not.  I'm just grateful for the heads up rather than a no show. 

Kevin Slater

[TumYum]

3 minutes ago, Kevin Slater said:

It's none of my business whether the excuse is true or not.  I'm just grateful for the heads up rather than a no show. 

Kevin Slater

While I 100% agree with Mr. Slater here, it does seem a bit "cold hearted" at times when a provider cancels on you.

Witness:

On a very recent trip from New York to SF, I had made plans quite a bit in advance with a provider for a meeting which we both confirmed and for which we had an animated conversation about just would/would not happen.... we were all good to go until the day before when he texted me to tell me that a "family commitment" due to a religious holiday  made the meeting impossible.

Possible? Sure. Likely that the provider had not anticipated this conflict well before he texted me the cancellation (with no option to re-schedule)? Hardly.

[+ KensingtonHomo]

1 hour ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

That’s what I’m saying. I guess some figure there’s no way around that, so what can I say. I wouldn’t even say cold feet, as much as probably juggling other contacts. 
 

Like how does someone just “conveniently” get sick the day were supposed to meet. Especially the ones with the Covid 3rd and 4th party stuff: a friend of a friend of a friend, tested positive. So now they have to cancel 🤦🏽‍♂️

Yes, that totally sucks. 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

2 hours ago, Kevin Slater said:

It's none of my business whether the excuse is true or not.  I'm just grateful for the heads up rather than a no show. 

Kevin Slater

Yeah but some of these have been very annoying and inconvenient. Like yesterday I was just talking to the guy and narrowing down a time, I even modified something I was going to do today, because I didn’t want to have too many things going on leading up to the session.

Question is: would you give a person a 2nd chance if they did, or have you found they even follow back up at all? 
 

I say this because I met a client who even confessed he lied about being ill when he cancelled the morning of. But he eventually kept the session saying that he was just having cold feet.

That’s why I think I’m just going have to start start getting 1/2 upfront, before putting anyone down on schedule.

[Kevin Slater]

5 minutes ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

Question is: would you give a person a 2nd chance if they did, or have you found they even follow back up at all? 

Oh sure. Maybe I wouldn’t rearrange my day around it though. And if it happened again I might not take future bookings, out of concern for his health. 

Kevin Slater

[MiamiLooker]

9 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

I was going to bring this other the other day, but was like…whatever. However, this seems to be a common thing now especially with next day appointments. I know there may be some genuine circumstances of it happening, but this is becoming a recurring theme: I’ll get contacted for a booking, with I may not be available for right away. Try to plan for the next day, but then get a text in the morning that they’re either sick or someone been exposed so they might be exposed. 
 

Or get the ones who seem perfectly fine the day prior, but then today claim to have this or that ailment all of a sudden. One guy even told me earlier this week, he was in bed all day with strep throat, and it was only noon and he sent it in Adam4Adam. I’m almost sure that was a lie because, you don’t just “wake up” with strep throat. It’s something you have to get tested for, and if it’s that bad, generally it’s something he should have been feeling prior to that.

I know people try to be cautious and considerate and not pass anything on (BS, because people out here don’t even be wearing masks when they have a cough or sneeze), but I just have a hard time believing it sometimes. I’m pretty sure at least 3 people in the past couple months have lied about being sick when they really weren’t.

If they were to tell you the truth that they're no longer horny and just changed their mind about the appointment, wouldn't that piss you off more than if they make up some story about being sick or a death in their family (since you'd never really be sure if they're lying or not)?

[Jarrod_Uncut]

6 hours ago, MiamiLooker said:

If they were to tell you the truth that they're no longer horny and just changed their mind about the appointment, wouldn't that piss you off more than if they make up some story about being sick or a death in their family (since you'd never really be sure if they're lying or not)?

Actually no, It wouldn’t. It would change my perception more if they couldn’t discuss the circumstance, and thought feeding me a fib is more integrity than leaving room to sort out whatever is actually the issue. 
 

 

[Jamie21]

I’d rather know the truth if it’s that they’re no longer horny or they have cold feet. It’s usually evident when they book the session that they’re booking when horny or are anxious / exploring so when the ‘inevitable’ “sorry I’m sick” message comes through I’m not surprised.

Signs of booking when horny: 

- Lots of pictures sent (of cock or ass). 
- sex chat as part of the booking. 
- requests for all sorts of activities. 
- requests for pics / videos of me (beyond what’s on my website).  
- and the classic “it’s a surprise for my wife” scenario which I always decline anyway before anything gets booked 🙄

Signs of booking when anxious or exploring:

- “I’ve never done this before”. 
- Questions about discretion and sexual health etc (more than what is on my website). 
- detailed explanation about why they’re booking (which is actually quite helpful to know if the session does actually happen).

If any or all of these are present in the booking then I know with 90% accuracy that he will ‘call sick’ on the day (or the day before in response to my day before confirmation message).

I’d rather know the real reason but it makes no difference to how I respond. The horny booker is given one more chance, the anxious booker is asked next time they make contact (if indeed they do try again) to be 100% sure they’re ready and I try to reassure them I’m not going to be horrible!! The anxious/ inexperienced clients are sometimes the most pleasurable to help so I try to be understanding. Everyone starts their journey at some point and I like to be the person they choose to do that with. So they get more latitude about booking. 
 

[mike carey]

21 hours ago, BuffaloKyle said:

I'd honestly think 99% of the time if someone who made an appt the day before says they are now sick are lying. If it was made a few days to a week before I'd say more like 50/50. 

In part this is a sign of the times. In the general community the idea of 'presenteeism', where people turn up to work when they are ill and 'soldier on' has fallen out of vogue. Here, we've even had health officials and others in authority telling us that if we're sick stay away from work (and from crowded places). A sore throat or a dose of the runs can develop overnight or during the day. Many people are still extremely cautious about any sort of cold or flu symptoms. Perhaps we always should have been less cavalier about the possibility of passing on even a minor illness.

That's not to say they are all being truthful. But neither should we assume the worst.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

9 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

I’d rather know the truth if it’s that they’re no longer horny or they have cold feet. It’s usually evident when they book the session that they’re booking when horny or are anxious / exploring so when the ‘inevitable’ “sorry I’m sick” message comes through I’m not surprised.

Signs of booking when horny: 

- Lots of pictures sent (of cock or ass). 
- sex chat as part of the booking. 
- requests for all sorts of activities. 
- requests for pics / videos of me (beyond what’s on my website).  
- and the classic “it’s a surprise for my wife” scenario which I always decline anyway before anything gets booked 🙄

Signs of booking when anxious or exploring:

- “I’ve never done this before”. 
- Questions about discretion and sexual health etc (more than what is on my website). 
- detailed explanation about why they’re booking (which is actually quite helpful to know if the session does actually happen).

If any or all of these are present in the booking then I know with 90% accuracy that he will ‘call sick’ on the day (or the day before in response to my day before confirmation message).

I’d rather know the real reason but it makes no difference to how I respond. The horny booker is given one more chance, the anxious booker is asked next time they make contact (if indeed they do try again) to be 100% sure they’re ready and I try to reassure them I’m not going to be horrible!! The anxious/ inexperienced clients are sometimes the most pleasurable to help so I try to be understanding. Everyone starts their journey at some point and I like to be the person they choose to do that with. So they get more latitude about booking. 
 

All of the above!

But this is also why I’ve moved from deposits to consultation fee now. Because I was doing all that question answering, and then people would go silent or suddenly become ill when asked for deposit. Nope 👎🏾 

I rather use that time to focus on other things.  

[dcguy20]

The one and only time I cancelled a few hours prior, is because I ended up in the ER. 

I've had more providers cancel last minute.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

1 hour ago, dcguy20 said:

The one and only time I cancelled a few hours prior, is because I ended up in the ER. 

I've had more providers cancel last minute.

You’re a good one 👍🏾 

[Luv2play]

There is a bug running around in my town which I caught on the weekend. It causes a 24 hour GI upset with the runs but no nausea or cramps or fever. I thought I had food poisoning but when I went into work today at my volunteer association, feeling much better, a co-worker told me about this bug.

Now if this had happened a week ago it might have spoiled my sessions with two great providers. This week I had nothing planned so no cancelling needed.

I once went through with an overnight before the pandemic and was feeling off the afternoon before my date. I should have cancelled and given him an appropriate fee and not wasted an expensive ov fee where I could not enjoy myself at all. Needless to say he got a good night's rest which I got to witness as I tossed and turned.

[Jarrod_Uncut]

41 minutes ago, Luv2play said:

I should have cancelled and given him an appropriate fee

If everyone did that accordingly, I probably wouldn’t ever have to question about it lol. 

 

[Luv2play]

So what would have been an appropriate fee? This was 3 years ago and we had arranged the overnight session weeks in advance at my hotel. He lived in another city but travelled frequently to the city where I was also visiting.

We met in my hotel lobby at 7 and I told him immediately my stomach didn't feel right. The first thing we did was cancel the reservations at a 5 star restauant which he had chosen and instead opted for a place nearby. So instead of spending $4 to $500 on dinner, I spent $75 for the two of us.

I hardly touched my food and that is when I should have called it off. Had I done that he would be out $1500 and missed out on a great meal. A few months earlier we had had a 3 to 4 hour date which included dinner and play back at my hotel. I had paid him $750. 

So I am thinking I should have paid him $500 for his time, about 1 and a half to 2 hours at this point, including companionship at dinner. His usual fee was $300 at that time. Oh, and he was a fairly well known porn star having worked in the states for some of the big studios.

This is all hindsight but am I reasonable in my thinking? 

Edited April 27, 2022 by Luv2play

[Jarrod_Uncut]

20 hours ago, Luv2play said:

So what would have been an appropriate fee? This was 3 years ago and we had arranged the overnight session weeks in advance at my hotel. He lived in another city but travelled frequently to the city where I was also visiting.

We met in my hotel lobby at 7 and I told him immediately my stomach didn't feel right. The first thing we did was cancel the reservations at a 5 star restauant which he had chosen and instead opted for a place nearby. So instead of spending $4 to $500 on dinner, I spent $75 for the two of us.

I hardly touched my food and that is when I should have called it off. Had I done that he would be out $1500 and missed out on a great meal. A few months earlier we had had a 3 to 4 hour date which included dinner and play back at my hotel. I had paid him $750. 

So I am thinking I should have paid him $500 for his time, about 1 and a half to 2 hours at this point, including companionship at dinner. His usual fee was $300 at that time. Oh, and he was a fairly well known porn star having worked in the states for some of the big studios.

This is all hindsight but am I reasonable in my thinking? 

This is a bit of a different situation than what I’m referring to. The circumstances I refer to are the ones who don’t meet after calling in sick last minute, and usually don’t leave anything in compensation. Often times, this occurs in the morning (almost like they just wake up, and suddenly change their minds - or are no longer drunk/horny/high versus a case of being sick) 

In your case, it wouldn’t of been the worst thing to just meet him, then give something partial and hold until next time. 
 

And just a disclaimer: I don’t recommend anyone risking it to not get the provider sick, however…I’m bringing up this topic because in the past couple months, I’ve had like 4-5 clients call in sick at the last minute. Of all of them, I can say I didn’t actually believe any of them were being truthful, especially since they were all text messaged. Which gives me no real evidence of it being true.

[Guest davebk]

I was finally going to be in the same city with a total dream hire - one that had been on my list for a long time.  I actually declined a social event while I was in town so I could make the hire.  Made the plans about five days before.  Then four days before, woke up with excruciating jaw pain.  Needed a root canal.  Was popping Advil every four hours, and anxious about getting the root canal as soon as the trip was over.  There was no way my mouth could be doing the things I had dreamed of with this guy.  I let him know as soon as possible.

We had several text exchanges leading up to the booking and the day between booking and when I saw the dentist.  It kept getting hotter and hotter.  I felt awful when I had to cancel three days before.  It was his home town and he was very chill about it and said he understood.  

I don't feel so bad about the fact that I had to cancel; I feel awful that he might think I was lying.  Ugh.