KensingtonHomo

I’ve only experienced this a few times. Even a highly erotic massage usually doesn’t include making out.

I agree with @Thique. Plenty of fish.

Your life experience - fascinating though it is - is irrelevant to living in a hetero-patriarchal society. A single mother raised me, and I have worked mainly in women-majority fields, but that doesn't change the fact that our society is dominated by men, who occupy most elected offices, run most companies, have most of the money, etc. Even the gains women have made in the past 50 years or so are primarily based on them doing double duty (family AND career) or fitting into patriarchal structures. I'm an SA survivor with rape fantasies. I don't have any moral or ethical issues with anyone's kink (as long as everyone is a consenting adult), but I find the attraction curious as I don't experience it. Once I learn a man is straight, my desire vanishes.

Girl, it would help if you spent more time with gay guys. Maybe you'd learn how to read and throw shade because this is weak tea. In your sad attempt to shade me, you have to go back in time to my twink days - imagine I was not desirable (rather than the reality that I was beating them off with a stick because I was very prudish due to HIV) - and then further ignore the reality that a significant percentage of younger men (20s to early 30s) are attracted to older men, hence all the "daddy" discourse and porn.

JFC, you sound like Tucker Carlson. There is no such thing as "Lesbian Equality Theory." If you're referring to Queer Theory, that also has nothing to do with "pretending we're all the same." Men are not "wired" in one particular way. This is you buying into a misogynistic lie propagated by patriarchal social norms that refer to what makes women sexually desirable, e.g., hip-to-breast ratio, relative youth, body fat distribution, etc. To the extent men are attracted to women based on those criteria, it's because they appear fertile and capable of carrying a pregnancy to term. There is no correlation for same-sex/gender desire. You're not attracted to a twunk because he's likely to become pregnant and have a viable pregnancy. This is like anti-trans people claiming we're attracted to chromosomes.

My husband is 6’1” and a lean 180. I’m a bit shorter and thicker with an ass most 25 year olds envy. The guys we can fuck for free are all hot and generally 15-20 years our junior. It seems to me that you and PA project both your narrow views of attractiveness AND your experience onto everyone on this forum. Maybe stop doing that.

I have never HAD to pay for sex, though I was offered several sex work jobs in my 20s, as a dancer and an escort. My guess is you don’t HAVE to pay either, but you choose to because a) you have a specific type that you’d find hard to get on an app and b) you’re busy and don’t want to invest the time. What I find odd about you and @marylander1940 is that you’re not happy to just hire guys and trade tips. You have to constantly berate other people’s tastes, bodies, interests, and desires. And now you’re on this whole DARVO (look it up) response with me, where you’re trying to cast me as the bad guy “gatekeeper” for calling out your shitty behavior.

What’s “rare for clients?” We hire primarily for convenience. Sure we could spend hours on Grindr and Scruff where everyone is flakey, and then see if a guy we’re attracted to fits into our competing schedules. Oddly, we are most often approached on the apps by guys in their 20s. Since we’re not attracted to most of them because they tend to be immature and bad at sex (as were we all), it’s kind of pointless. I’m younger than PA, but not by much. My husband is older, but also not by much. We’re both good looking guys (he’s a Disney prince come to life) and in good shape. And we both enjoy a wide variety of types of men.

This is fucked up. You should delete it. I’m an SA survivor and you equating a lazy escort to me being held down and face fucked under threat of violence is disgusting. It’s offensive to SA survivors and @Mydavid who had an unpleasant but CONSENSUAL experience.

You said being handsome is “rare,” which if we generous let’s say it’s 10 percent. You only find 1 in 10 men attractive. That’s very unrealistic, as well as “intolerant and undemocratic.” And PA’s obsessed with youth and body composition that is probably achievable by 5-10% of the population. And that’s with steroids, HGH, filler, etc. Yet you’re both older and not in the shape of what you desire. Rather than question the way advertising and Hollywood has reduced beauty to a commodity you’re determined to naturalize it. Personally I feel more attractive now and I enjoy sex more with a wider variety of men than I did in my 20s. I feel almost sorry for men who are trapped in such a limited view of attractiveness and desire.

So you realize that both you and @pubic_assistance have unreasonable and unrealistic standards for beauty and fitness? Perhaps you should then keep those opinions to yourself as they’re not widely shared, nor kind, nor useful to most people on the forum.

That’s annoying.

I'm honestly curious about where and with whom you interact. Most of my friends are conventionally handsome across a range of ages. My sense is you have an extremely narrow definition of handsome like @pubic_assistance has of being "in shape." I encourage you to read about how those standards get developed and normalized because it's not natural. It's advertising and media.

My comment wasn't directed at anyone who would hire a straight guy. I was speaking about myself. Also, as we live in a hetero-patriarchal society, does that desire for straight men equal a "kink," or is it internalized homophobia? That's nothing against any individual guy who hires straight guys or desires straight guys. It's a commentary on societal dynamics.

I don't want to be "dominated" by a straight guy, or pay to blow him. Honestly, he should pay me. I'm very good at it.

Given just the people, I know who hire; I find it hard to believe that most escorts only see a handsome client once or twice a year.

I don’t think Combs is comparable to anyone on here. He’s been in trouble with the law both - legally and civilly - for over 25 years. The current claims against him are part of a longstanding pattern, and I’m sure are at least partly true. DOH doesn’t care what anyone on here does.

Not to go too off track - because Alex is great - but I'm not a big tipper. Like a few others have said, providers are setting their rates. If I get a massage at a spa, I tip well. In Alex's case, I felt he set his rate a bit too low.

My thinking is that I put what was charged since a tip is optional. If I put $200, guys might assume that was the price.

Okay, if you're emailing people and avoiding texting, there's a good chance they're not seeing your messages or by the time they do they're already booked. Most providers prefer texting, so if you're sticking to email, you're going to get left behind.

Yes. I told him he had to charge more. $150 for therapeutic I can see. But I told him he should go to $180 for erotic. I gave him $200.

Yes, they're as predictable daylight savings time. I honestly feel for them on some level. People who judge others harshly usually treat themselves the same way. That said, I know I won't convince them that they're anything but savvy realists. But as someone who has friendly relationships with providers and providers who've been friends, I know that Jamie and Simon's explanation of their experience is closer to reality, e.g., some guys really enjoy their work and have enjoyable encounters with a wide range of clients. Some folk self-select for negative experiences.

I contacted Alex at the last minute because I had a meeting canceled. He was prompt in responding to me, and we were able to connect. In short, he was terrific. His apartment was very nice and clean. He was clean-shaven and blonder than his photos, which made him far more attractive. Alex was very welcoming and easy to speak with him. We had a nice chat before and at the start of the massage. Then, he asked if I wanted some quiet time, and we did. He uses medium pressure, which is perfect for relaxing. The extras were wonderful, and I'll be seeing him again.

I consider obesity to be a public health issue resulting from a combination of agricultural policy, which has made inexpensive food extraordinarily calorie dense, and disordered (over) eating due to stress, lack of exercise, and chemicals put in food to make them addictive. Treating obesity as a personal failing is ahistorical, as we've seen rates skyrocket along with changes in work, food policy, closure of public space for exercise and recreation and - most importantly - Western governments disciplining labor so most people are doing far worse than their parents.

While I'm conventionally attractive (not super-hot) for my age, the providers who I most enjoy bring the energy and generosity that @Jamie21 and @Jarrod_Uncut both espouse. I went for a massage yesterday, and the provider was much more attractive than his photos, which were just cute. The session went much further than a typical sensual massage because we had chemistry. Sexual chemistry is much more than appearance. It's pheromones, voice, personality, and countless other factors. We had a nice chat before and at the beginning of the massage. Afterward, we talked about how far it went, and he said he's attracted to older guys and what we liked about each other from our conversation and interaction. This was not romantic, but it was enjoyable for both of us. For me, if clients hire only "10s" who are likely obsessed with appearance and also go in thinking, "A guy that looks like this would never fuck me," then that will be your experience. If you hire attractive guys who also enjoy their work, love providing pleasure and find a variety of types attractive, your experience will be different.