newatthis

Chances are that the provider does not care what your life away from him entails as far as your orientation, or at the least, he does not care about knowing as much as you care about telling.  So when you are ready, tell him what you want him to know.  He has heard it all and it likely does not rub him the wrong the way.  
As far as being out, I was happy in a monogamous heterosexual relationship and as a result, I did not start seeing men until I was almost 50,  It seems that at that age no one really cares with whom you have sex and it may be that some do not believe that sex happens for people over 50. Being widowed, did occasionally raise the question as to whether I would date again or marry again.  I did ty dating again and did not care for it with either sex.   In any case, my situation now is Don't Ask, Don't Tell.  They don't ask and I feel no responsibility to discuss my sex likes with them.  I also do not ask them about their sex life.  To me, it is rude to ask  and it is really none of my business if my friends or relatives are having sex, how often, with whom, in what position.  On the rare occasion that sex comes up in conversation with my friends, it is usually relating funny experiences and long past stories, which have been told numerous times in the past. 
In my office, I do have a gay pride flag that was given out by the hospital years ago and which sits wordlessly on top of a cabinet. If people notice, they do not ask.   A few months ago, while taking photos for a graduation of medical residents, there was a different group taking photos for Gay Pride month and they asked for Gay and Gay Allied persons to join their photo.  I did so.  Again without comment from me or to me.  
So really, at this point, my sex life to others is more. Don't Care and Please Keep it to Yourself.  

One has to wonder why someone would ask such a question (in general; obviously there are specific circumstances or conversations where it might be appropriate).  

One has to wonder why someone would ask such a question (in general; obviously there are specific circumstances or conversations where it might be appropriate).  

Sometimes younger Americans forget how dangerous it often was in the past to be "out" in America, and how dangerous it still is in many parts of the world. Gay men anywhere have many reasons other than legal or physical danger to want to stay "in the closet." Being openly gay may affect their livelihood, their acceptance in a religion that is important to them, their personal relationships with family or other important persons in their lives. One's sexual orientation or sexual behavior is something that one can manage to hide more easily than one's race, physical disabilities, lack of education or financial means, and other issues that affect one's social interactions.
That being said, staying in the closet can have psychological repercussions, given how important one's sexuality is to a healthy, integrated personality. In my late teens, I had what was loosely called a "nervous breakdown," and my parents sent me to see a counseling psychologist. He gave me the best advice--and surprising advice in those days--which was to always tell the truth to myself about who I was, and to be honest with my loved ones, even if it was hard to do. In other situations, be as honest as you could be pragmatically (this was in the early 1960s, when being homosexually active  was illegal and could get one expelled from school, fired from a job, banned from the military, and even sent to prison). I went home from his office, and told my parents I was "homosexual" (they had no idea what "gay" meant), and to my relief they did not seem openly upset (my mother asked, "How do you know?" which caused me to start laughing and relax). I was already out to a couple of my closest friends, and from then on I was ready to admit my orientation to anyone else who asked. Within a couple more years I had met new friends who were very active in the burgeoning gay rights movement and had joined them in their activities; when a photo appeared in a major newspaper of me taking part in a protest, I gave up any pretense of not being gay.
I do not condemn anyone who stays in the closet for a good reason, though I still would encourage them to be as honest with themselves and as open with others as is possible for them. I agree that those who are stridently homophobic are usually fighting against fear of being perceived as gay by others.
 

The dancers who were not invited to his table compensated by being extra attentive to the other customers, especially in the back rooms....

The dancers who were not invited to his table compensated by being extra attentive to the other customers, especially in the back rooms....

The dancers who were not invited to his table compensated by being extra attentive to the other customers, especially in the back rooms....

He would spend his afternoons/early evenings at Campus (that's when there was something actually happening at Campus in the afternoon) and then move on to Stock.  He had a stable of retired dancers who would come out of the woodwork to sit at his table and enjoy his generosity.  I once struck up a conversation with a couple of other out-of-town visitors at Campus and mentioned the DL and how he behaved...the guys laughed and said "that's our friend (name)".  We compared enough details to convince me they knew him.  They had lots of stories about him, most of which I've long since forgotten.
Although I initially found his presence annoying, I came to enjoy watching him interact with the dancers...and miss him and those Campus afternoons.

He would spend his afternoons/early evenings at Campus (that's when there was something actually happening at Campus in the afternoon) and then move on to Stock.  He had a stable of retired dancers who would come out of the woodwork to sit at his table and enjoy his generosity.  I once struck up a conversation with a couple of other out-of-town visitors at Campus and mentioned the DL and how he behaved...the guys laughed and said "that's our friend (name)".  We compared enough details to convince me they knew him.  They had lots of stories about him, most of which I've long since forgotten.
Although I initially found his presence annoying, I came to enjoy watching him interact with the dancers...and miss him and those Campus afternoons.

He would spend his afternoons/early evenings at Campus (that's when there was something actually happening at Campus in the afternoon) and then move on to Stock.  He had a stable of retired dancers who would come out of the woodwork to sit at his table and enjoy his generosity.  I once struck up a conversation with a couple of other out-of-town visitors at Campus and mentioned the DL and how he behaved...the guys laughed and said "that's our friend (name)".  We compared enough details to convince me they knew him.  They had lots of stories about him, most of which I've long since forgotten.
Although I initially found his presence annoying, I came to enjoy watching him interact with the dancers...and miss him and those Campus afternoons.

I visited to Montreal last week for the first time in 4 years, and I had a great time. I stayed at the Hyatt Place Montreal, formerly the Gouverneur. I thought the renovations made for a huge improvement. It's clean, comfortable, not too expensive (in mid-December, anyway), and the location is as convenient as ever for the strip clubs. I did not plan it this way, but I made it each of the 4 bars twice.
Campus is thriving, as others have noted. There were plenty of dancers circulating with their shirts off (not always the case), and they were all quite attractive (not always the case). They were all good about taking no for an answer (again, not always the case), and I never saw groups of dancers congregating together and ignoring the customers. I did several private dances; the standouts were Zack, Apollo, and Pepe (looks like a lumberjack, huge all over, very generous and interactive).
Stock was a mixed bag for me. I did not have to pay the cover the first time I went (the cashier had wandered off and the security guard eventually just waved me in), and that was good because it was very dead (this was a Wednesday night). There were very few customers, long gaps between stage shows, and most of the dancers did not drop their shorts at all. Most of the dancers kept their shirts on offstage and huddled in groups talking to each other all night, not circulating or talking to customers at all. I tried to flag down a couple of them multiple times, but no luck. Santiago (Cuban, short, great body, really well-endowed) was the only dancer approaching customers, and he did more privates than all the other dancers combined while I was there. There was a tall, slender Black dancer named Piper who did not even take his shirt off during his stage shows, much less his shorts; that seemed odd to me, at a strip club. Stock was much livelier on Friday, but there were still lots of dancers ignoring the customers and talking only to each other; I don't know how they make any money that way.
Taboo was dead on Thursday night. In fact, I was the only customer there when I arrived (which I did not realize because all the dancers were sitting at the bar, fully clothed, so I thought they were customers). One dancer talked to me for the whole time I was there (<30 minutes); I did not want to do a private with him, but I could not think of a way to get him to move on ("I would prefer to sit all by myself staring into space rather than talk to you" seems a little unkind). I left as soon as I could. It was busier on Friday, and there were 2 dancers I would have done privates with; but they were both occupied with other customers the whole time I was there.
Red Diamond (formerly Expose, formerly Luxe, formerly...) was very quiet both times I stopped in. I have always liked this club - in all its many incarnations - more than most forum members. The staff has always been very friendly, the private dance area is really private, and I have had lots of interesting private dances there. Damian (tall, swimmer's build, friendly and low-key) was the only dancer working both nights. He was very approachable and chatty, and I had fun private dances with him twice. Friday was busier than Thursday, and Damian said he expected it to pick up later in the evening (I was there pretty early).
This was my first real vacation trip since before the pandemic, but I hope to get back to Montreal this Spring.
 
Ichabod

I think Aidan is cute. Very suckable nipples.

What an ad for your services!

What an ad for your services!

Depends on the client. Some want an immediate, if not rushed, down to business approach. Others like to draw out every moment and it can be pretty erotic. I get into it either way. Honestly though I prefer the latter. Tends to happen to me with the clients I attract. I see more regulars than one and done clients.
Regulars who are into it like the slow, savoring, satisfaction of unwrapping in perfect patience. Teasing, exploring, exacting every inch of one another’s gradually more naked body until we’re down to underwear and still teasing and throbbing while keeping it on, until we’re both aching and ready to move on to more explicit action.
Even then, we step back from desperate intense primal urging and ravaging to some slow, sensual and relaxing moments and then dive back in again. Lots of heavy, paced buildup back and forth up to an incredibly heightened, charged climax.
Sometimes more than one climax depending on how long they are hiring for. Either way, it’s great having plenty of time to recover and relax and unwind and connect on another level as humans before starting to wrap up.
Or the wham, bam, thank you, man. Zip up and ship out with barely a word approach. I see the whole range.
Damn, I could write cheesy pulp romance if I wanted to… oops too late. Channeling my inner Meryl Streep in She-Devil:

 

After a long absence from Johnson's Tampa, I spent last Friday night being very entertained! Went early to meet up with a fav dancer. Nate was behind the bar looking REALLY good. Clearly he's been hitting the gym. Great service from this sexy man. Eros (Argentinian Stud), great smile, shredded, a bit hairy .. one of my favs from FLL was there. He is in the Tampa area now. Another dancer was seen... used to, maybe still does work at LeBoy. He has beefed up. Longish curly dark hair. Sorry, don't know his name. Very diverse group of dancers. Something for everyone. Hit the lap dance room 5 times and had a blast. Sat with Matt for a bit and enjoyed a cocktail with him. Off to Wilton Manors this weekend for more Johnson's and a bit of LeBoy too.

Yes, but you apparently missed the point I was making, Spark Plug.

The idea of a "massage intern" (as it is called on his profile) really gets me going....

if you don't know taz, you clearly don't know much about montreal

I love these kind of places. So few exist. I’ve not been to it but I have been to similar venues. The attraction seems to me to be a mix of the opportunity for exhibitionism: to do outrageous acts in public that wouldn’t be possible in polite society, the sheer randomness of encounters that @Coolwave35so evocatively describes and the democratisation that a dark room provides where what you look like isn’t such an issue. For me the greater variety of people there the better; straight, gay, old, young, male, female and everything in between. It’s society but with the rules changed, where it seems that almost endless possibilities exist. 
 

 

@coriolis888should be thanked for alerting people of a problem there.  
The known & ongoing site security issues may not show up in all browsers.  Proceed at your own risk.  
I imagine getting hacked by cyber criminals would be most unpleasant when they have access to all kinds of personal data.  
 
there might be one good thing about the other site - since none of them actually hire anyone, you’ll probably never see threads about *DEPOSITS*

I am grateful for the moderators here.
I am not without guilt for over-stepping boundaries but I certainly respect the vigilance to keep the space "safe" for people to disagree without feeling attacked.

Yes, you’ve made that suggestion a couple times… thanks for your continued interest none the less. 

I understood your point. Again, it does not apply to me. I can’t make anyone do anything. My question was how I should handle this. And I’ve gotten sound advice. Thanks for your input and the time you spent reading this. 

Well I don’t usually resort to anecdotes to make conclusions but as someone who is also bi, I have met married couples where the man is bi and they have gay children. Most I imagine aren’t out to their children as this lifestyle is not one I find to be easily accepted but I may be wrong. My experience would challenge your statement. Don’t have the data to make a conclusion but would just point out that our experiences do not align so your statement may be true for you and mine true for me.