maninsoma

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I wonder if it just seems creepy to us as gay men.  I can imagine that whoever made this decision back then simply didn't even think about whether either the younger or older men were gay, so to them it just seemed like two men sharing sleeping quarters with no notion that sexual attraction/attention would enter the picture. 

I wonder if it just seems creepy to us as gay men.  I can imagine that whoever made this decision back then simply didn't even think about whether either the younger or older men were gay, so to them it just seemed like two men sharing sleeping quarters with no notion that sexual attraction/attention would enter the picture. 

I wonder if it just seems creepy to us as gay men.  I can imagine that whoever made this decision back then simply didn't even think about whether either the younger or older men were gay, so to them it just seemed like two men sharing sleeping quarters with no notion that sexual attraction/attention would enter the picture. 

I’ve never lost $100 at a casino. 

If you're talking solely about escorts, I'd say that including "daddies" in their preferences section is smart if they don't discriminate against clients based on age.  Some older clients are going to use this as a filter so they only see ads from guys who clearly won't make their age an issue.  It's the same thing with "bears."  Maybe a provider isn't that interested in having sex with bears or daddies on his own time, but if he welcomes bears or daddies as clients it's smart for him to indicate that so his ad doesn't get omitted from search results if a client uses either of those as a filter.  Of course I'm sure there are some providers who truly have a thing for daddies -- I have a friend who has always preferred men old enough to be his dad and has even hooked up with some guys old enough to be his grandfather, so I know that there are some men who really are into men significantly older than they are.

Another upside of the .eu site is that it works with the hide.me proxy website whereas .men does not.

Another upside of the .eu site is that it works with the hide.me proxy website whereas .men does not.

Yes, I thought about it after I posted.  I didn't mean to give the impression that the guy has no standards.  I just meant that I've seen content he's filmed with guys who aren't especially lean and whom he described as "older," though I have no idea what his upper age limit is.

https://www.companyofmen.org/forum/99-legacy-gallery/
 

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

The problem with that advice is that there are a lot of legitimate clients who won't pay a deposit unless it's for an extended booking, so that strategy will likely result in far fewer clients.

In the US, I imagine no "place" that offers massage will discuss anything about extras on phone. And businesses offering any service meet demand. M4M Massage is not high in demand. At a high-end day spa, there will be male workers on staff, but hankypanky costs them their job.  
 
Can I ask why you don't just contact a listed provider and travel to him? Sounds like his home facility won't be worse than this place, and you can verify him in photos as "hombre"...

I wouldn't recommend folks to accept drinks from someone they just met especially in a private place unless it comes in a sealed container like a bottle of water or a can of soda/pop. 

I'm confused as to why he agreed to come over with an exit plan already in place since you wrote that you had already met for an extended coffee date.  I think most men would simply decline the second date.  Did something happen during your half hour breakfast that would make him want to leave?  I mean, you yourself wrote that you were "glad that he left," so it sounds like things weren't going as well as during your initial coffee date.

Same here.  I think it's worse for the party that's planning to bottom -- all of that prep for a no show is irritating.  Not that it isn't irritating anyway, but to have spent time preparing to bottom only to be ghosted is so frustrating.

The problem with that advice is that there are a lot of legitimate clients who won't pay a deposit unless it's for an extended booking, so that strategy will likely result in far fewer clients.

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

The argument that seeking a professional service, such as hiring a clown or meeting a "dreamy guy," requires agreeing to the provider’s terms, including a deposit, oversimplifies the dynamics of professional engagements and unfairly prioritizes the provider’s interests.
The claim that this is solely a "professional service" and not a relationship dismisses the mutual respect inherent in any professional interaction. Even in service based engagements, both parties, client and provider, have valid needs. My concern with deposits is that they solely benefit the provider and offer no protection to the client. A deposit secures the provider’s time but leaves the client vulnerable if the provider cancels, underperforms, or fails to deliver as promised. Additionally, there’s a privacy risk and the possibility of creating a paper trail that could come back to bite you later. The assertion that deposits are standard, like for a clown, ignores that most providers do not require them. Comparing a provider to a clown and arguing they deserve the same respect overlooks that respect is mutual. A clown’s deposit is part of a structured agreement, often backed by contracts or booking platforms, ensuring accountability. In contrast, a vague demand for $100 to “hold a spot” lacks transparency and accountability. Respect is earned through clear communication and fair terms, not blind compliance with one party’s demands.
While providers can set terms, clients are not obligated to accept them unquestioningly. A professional service should involve negotiation and transparency, ensuring both parties’ needs are met. Deposits may be reasonable in some very specific cases but since most providers operate without requiring one, clients should feel empowered to seek those who prioritize mutual trust over rigid demands.

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

The relevance of how long someone has been a member is simply that others here have little idea who you are.  For example, you could be someone who's been active on the site for a long time but decided to create a new profile simply to promote a specific point of view or specific provider while not having your posts tied to your well known identity.  
At the end of the day, this deposit or no deposit issue will never be resolved to everyone's satisfaction.  It's clearly in the provider's benefit as long as he has sufficient business to make up for the loss of some clients who never pay a deposit.  For a variety of reasons (privacy and concerns about being scammed being the top two) some clients will never pay a deposit.  It isn't like either side is incorrect, even if some of the arguments for requiring a deposit are far off the mark.  But I think even the "no deposits ever" clients here will acknowledge that a provider can run his business how he wants to (charge a higher than market rate, require a deposit, require a face photograph, etc), and they can simply book a different provider if they don't like those policies.

1.  A client might also lose money if the escort flakes -- travel expenses and hotel expenses if he is hosting but cannot host where he lives.  You might argue that losing money you already earned is not as bad as not getting income you were promised, but they're basically the same thing in the sense that both are losing money.  The main difference would be for a provider that has no savings so the loss of income might result in him not being able to pay his bills.  
2.  For some of us, we don't have partners and it might not be that easy to open a hook-up app to find someone who interests us and is interested in us.  Even the suggestion that a client can just hire another escort at the last minute isn't really true as lots of providers aren't available at the drop of a hat.