maninsoma

Memorial day is not a holiday to honor veterans.  It's a day to remember those military personnel who fought and died in Americas wars.  Nov. 11 is the Veterans day holiday in the US.

And I thought that it was too much seeing people praying to ChatGPT! The information returned by AI is a generic just as the Internet is. I didn't learn anything new from what you posted. It seems like it took these threads and summarized them for you.
Personally, I am not fond of using AI for any aspect of my personal, especially hiring. Aside from bias, inaccuracies (what they call hallucinations), security and privacy issues, I just don't see the point of using that tool that way.
I am also on the side of those who think that it is not as private and safe as it looks. I know that was just for fun, I'd be cautious too.

Is it possible that either something in your texts makes him decide not to reply to you (not suggesting you're doing anything "wrong" necessarily but there could be all sorts of reasons why an escort might choose not to reply to certain prospective clients) or he was simply already busy when you texted?  I understand the frustration in not hearing back from someone you're interested in, but I don't think I would count a lack of response a "red flag."

Jamie, as usual, wrote a cogent response but I want to highlight one thing he wrote:  "A script feels like a hard sell.  Have a few messages you'd like to get over but do it in a personal way that is tuned towards the client."  This is sage advice for any type of service professional.  I've written this next sentence so many times and erased it so I guess I don't know what else to say other than that as a client I want to feel like I'm being appreciated as a person and not just viewed as source of income.

Unfortunately, "Alfie" is now penniless without any prospect of gainful employment  and living with "mom".  He had been banned from entry into the US for five years. He has restrictions on "usage": that is, he is "pure" and clients may look but not touch. However, he is in need of transportation and the gift of a motor vehicle, the BMW brand is preferred, he will entertain being touched. He is very hurt, if you will, that not one of his legion of admirers in the USA have offered to be of any assistance to him in his dire need. Step up and show your appreciation, gentlemen: SEND MONEY. Small, insignificant monetary gifts will be accepted with scorn.

I don’t want to be unkind @purplekow And I’m not being judgemental but this was a last minute hook-up with what turned out to be a near-neighbour.
You stated you were “not particularly attracted to him”. Perhaps he felt the same about you.
I think this was what used to be called a case of ‘ships passing in the night’. Don’t overthink this.
There’s no etiquette attached here. When things don’t work out as you hoped, simply smile and say “Maybe another time…” and leave promptly.

I've been told something about me (personality, my face) makes it easy for people to talk to me. Some of the stuff I've heard is tragic and some of it the most uplifting.

Like the previous posters have mentioned, I have been told/asked a number of things by providers that isn't something necessarily part of a hiring session. Like about some of the horrible encounters or general bad behavior by clients, but also the positive stuff as well. Even shown awful messages from potential clients who never intended to hire the provider in the first place. I have had providers talk about their significant others (both good and bad)... their families... and other struggles or highlights they might have. I've even had providers trying to get me to hire their SO's. One even offered to bring his SO along for free, at no additional charge, because he trusted me. (His words not mine. I didn't take him up on the offer though.) I've heard it all.
Do I feel guilty in any way? Absolutely not. For one, I'm used to people spilling their guts to me... whether I know them well or not. However, if someone I know and like/love does it, to me it's a sign of the trust they have in me. I see it as a honor in some ways. They put their emotional trust in me which more often than not, as @Nue2thegame stated, the "relationship was strengthened". It is why I think over the years a number of the guys who have retired from providing I still talk to or see on some level.
If you feel guilty in some way because how bad other clients have treated the provider. That I understand and I sympathize. It is and can be a very tough business for provider and client alike.

This highlights a big difference between an escort I'd hire only once and someone whom I would hire repeatedly:  If a guy gets ready to leave as soon as "the main action" finishes, even if it's only half-way into the hour, then I would never hire him again even though I obviously enjoyed the first half.  A potential regular is going to understand that just being "company" is part of the job and will be able to converse, cuddle or whatever.  I certainly never expect a "round two" within an hour appointment and, at my age, I couldn't even have a second round in an hour, but it is nice just to touch someone with no expectation of it developing into sex.

Many guys are into feet. He’s just showing his assets. We all know RentMasseur guys are offering THAT kind of massage. That’s why I advertise on there 🙂 

20% retention rate isn’t bad. You’ve only been going a year, needs longer. It takes ages to build a regular client base.
You say you use a script post session. I wouldn’t do that. A script feels like a hard sell. Have a few messages you’d like to get over but do it in a personal way that is tuned towards the client. You need to get to know them at a more personal level. My guess is they feel ‘sold to’ and massage (whatever the style) is a very personal one to one service. Make it so they feel you see them as a whole person not another client. Contact them after the session to see how the session improved their pain (tell them you’ll do a follow up call in a week or so and are they ok with that?). You’ll get re bookings on those calls (but don’t force it). 
Also I think offering a one hour session is a good idea. People want to try you out before committing to a longer session. You could do the 1 hour and then offer the next 90m at a reduced rate. That reduces the barrier of the unknown for them and gives them the full experience at a reduced cost. Once you build in them the habit of coming back they’ll come back more. 
Business courses aren’t the place to learn this stuff. Learn it by doing. Ask the 20% of customers who do come back why they do so. Ask all your customers how they found you and what made them book. Listen to your customers. The answers are there , not in a business course. That would be a waste of money and time. 
Basically the number one rule is know who your customer is, understand what they want, and give it to them in a way that is satisfying but leaves space for more. In everything think of your customer first. You don’t go wrong if you think about who they are and what they want. Oh and whilst you’ll get great advice on business on here from successful providers (☺️) your client base is unlikely to be on here….
 
 

When I hired a lot more frequently, I had a few regulars but also hired new guys regularly as well.

When I was young, I'd say my "type" was more similar to me: preferably blond, young men with lean bodies, though I always preferred men more muscular than myself (though not into the body builder category).  Now I'd say that I am far more attracted to men with dark hair and skin darker than mine, and as I've gotten older my preference for men has skewed younger than me.  Not that I never find men in their sixties attractive, but I'd be lying if I said that my physical "type" wasn't more 20s/30s men.

I'm confused by this post.  First of all, Jung wrote about individuation, not individualization.  Broadly speaking, it's about integrating one's unconscious and conscious selves so I'm not sure how it has anything to do with expressing hurt about a masseur firing a long-term client.
I also don't know who Kevin is.

I haven't met him, but I know I've been seeing the same photos for a long time.  (The Rentmen ad indicates he's been advertising since 2009, so I'm guessing that many of these photos are at least 15 years old.)  

I don't want to debate whether this should be happening, but doesn't everyone know that this sort of thing is happening?  By that I mean, why would anyone who (a) has an easily identifiable identity (face on Rentmen, shows face in porn performances) and (b) does sex work even attempt to visit the USA at this point?  
I feel sorry for Milo Miles (and he is a cutie), but if he had thought about this in advance wouldn't he have realized that now is not the time to visit the US for any reason?

This highlights a big difference between an escort I'd hire only once and someone whom I would hire repeatedly:  If a guy gets ready to leave as soon as "the main action" finishes, even if it's only half-way into the hour, then I would never hire him again even though I obviously enjoyed the first half.  A potential regular is going to understand that just being "company" is part of the job and will be able to converse, cuddle or whatever.  I certainly never expect a "round two" within an hour appointment and, at my age, I couldn't even have a second round in an hour, but it is nice just to touch someone with no expectation of it developing into sex.

You started this thread and titled it I'm Really Stressed, so I assumed you were stressed as well as the escort you wrote about.

OT:  Yes, quiet familiar with that corner.  I actually eat at Mong Thu Cafe once a month just around the corner.  One of the better hole in the wall Vietnamese food places.  Cash only, but reasonably priced.   I've been there before they open at 7am before the sidewalks are hosed down and never felt unsafe.  The ladies that run the place can be more scary than any of the unhoused folks if they think you're being rude to them.  Always chuckle at how they could be their Soup Nazi reality show.   Plenty of hidden gem food places in that neighborhood.  

why would you have contacted him again after such a bad first experience?

Assuming the penis is clean, is there even such a thing as "penis breath?"

You started this thread and titled it I'm Really Stressed, so I assumed you were stressed as well as the escort you wrote about.

I'm not a lawyer so maybe I'm off base, but if the "offense" is that he was simply outed I don't think there's anything the guy can do legally.  Defamation (whether spoken or written) requires that the information be false.  If the estranged husband editorialized beyond the guy's sexual orientation (making statements about the guy's sexual activity, health information, etc), there could be a basis for a lawsuit.  I think intent also matters.  For example, if the estranged husband was divulging this information in a manner intended to harm your friend (loss of job, housing) he could be sued for that harassment even though the basis of the harassment is true.
I'll admit my first reaction is to feel sad that we are still in this place in the USA in 2026.  Having come out as a teenager in the late 1970s, I'm typically perplexed when adults make their sexual orientation a secretive "big deal."  Now that the cat's out of the bag, so to speak, hopefully this guy can just get on with living his life without worrying that his "secret" will get out.

You started this thread and titled it I'm Really Stressed, so I assumed you were stressed as well as the escort you wrote about.

I'm not a lawyer so maybe I'm off base, but if the "offense" is that he was simply outed I don't think there's anything the guy can do legally.  Defamation (whether spoken or written) requires that the information be false.  If the estranged husband editorialized beyond the guy's sexual orientation (making statements about the guy's sexual activity, health information, etc), there could be a basis for a lawsuit.  I think intent also matters.  For example, if the estranged husband was divulging this information in a manner intended to harm your friend (loss of job, housing) he could be sued for that harassment even though the basis of the harassment is true.
I'll admit my first reaction is to feel sad that we are still in this place in the USA in 2026.  Having come out as a teenager in the late 1970s, I'm typically perplexed when adults make their sexual orientation a secretive "big deal."  Now that the cat's out of the bag, so to speak, hopefully this guy can just get on with living his life without worrying that his "secret" will get out.

I'm not a lawyer so maybe I'm off base, but if the "offense" is that he was simply outed I don't think there's anything the guy can do legally.  Defamation (whether spoken or written) requires that the information be false.  If the estranged husband editorialized beyond the guy's sexual orientation (making statements about the guy's sexual activity, health information, etc), there could be a basis for a lawsuit.  I think intent also matters.  For example, if the estranged husband was divulging this information in a manner intended to harm your friend (loss of job, housing) he could be sued for that harassment even though the basis of the harassment is true.
I'll admit my first reaction is to feel sad that we are still in this place in the USA in 2026.  Having come out as a teenager in the late 1970s, I'm typically perplexed when adults make their sexual orientation a secretive "big deal."  Now that the cat's out of the bag, so to speak, hopefully this guy can just get on with living his life without worrying that his "secret" will get out.