soloyo215

Welcome to the forum, In one way or another, most-to-all of us have gone through some kind of learning experience in this world, What matters is that we learn our lessons and don't keep making the same mistakes. As you get familiar with this forum, you will see that there are providers who are great people and quite professional. Enjoy.

What was the reason to do it the first time? Also, if at some point you'll do it again, that can be a great time to reach out to the provider. And who knows if you mention to the provider that you don't normally shave. If he's into porn, maybe he's open minded enough to like you hairy too. I'm not a provider, but as a retired slut, I used to reach out to lovers in order of how much I liked them. I imagine that providers will have a preference and reach out to clients that they feel are better, more manageable and more enjoyable. I think that's stanard in every profession that involves reaching out to clients. O think that's great that you got a pleasant surprise with this provider. Most of my stationary providers reach out to me every now and then, sometimes just to say hello (probably as a form of reaching out without saying that they are reaqching out), and some to let me know about their upcomong schedule. I'm not sure if one practice or another is standard or common. Personally I wouldn't bother if a provider reaches out for more business, especially if you liked the experience and he seemt to have liked it too. I don't see it as bothersome. If there's insistence and more texts than you're comfortable with, that might be a different story. Glad you had a good time and I'd suggest to keep him in mind next time that you shave.

All kinds of gadgets. I'm not fond of inanimate foreign objects. Honest question: why do you inquire about this?

You deserve better.

I just took a picture of one walking in front of me.

I don't immediately reject the masseur, but inquire about it. I am not fond of the idea of using any gadgets on me. However, in other settings, such as when getting a nice makeover haircut and beard trim, the barber used some kind of vibrating device to massage my neck and shoilders and it feels celestial. I am not open to the idea of a device in a massage since part of my needs involve physical contant, sometimes erotic, sometimes relaxing/non-sexual, but actual physical contact.

I never knew that there's so much to talk about regarding this "available now" tihng. Life is so simple to me. I know that: 1. Providers do whatever they want as they see their actions fit their purpose (that's actually one of the reasons some have given for being in that line of work) 2. Just like inches, age, position, what they are into, available now can also be stretched, misrepresented, misued and abused. 3.Most importantly, the fact that there is a public announcement about the provider being available means that others, just like me, can see it and reach out to the provider at the same time or right before me, making him no longer available. That's kind of basic. I also agree that it might mean available to take calls and and scheduling. Without putting down those who feel an urge to see a provider now, now, NOW, I think it's reasonable to wait a few hours. They have to prepare, travel and make arrangements.

That's not what I'm referring to, don't change the subject,

All those were my struggles. Also in my case: making bad decisions, not having any roadmap to life, not having any mentoring, support, role model, good example, none of that not having any life skills, not having great interpersonal skills, trusting the wrong people getting ripped off with pretty much every service not knowing anything about money or management of the business aspect of life So, yes, it's scary, yes, you will make big mistakes, yes, life happens, but in my case, also yes: I learned and didn't make the same mistake twice I don't put up with anyone's bullshit I have pride and a lot of self-respect I learned, thrived, progressed and prospered I am completely independent and self-sufficient, even as a married man Something that seems typical of the newer generation is the fear of facing life on their own as adults. I don't blame young people for it, I blame their poor parenting under the misguided belief that discipline is abuse, resulting in lack of courage, along with a sense of entitlement, expecting things to just happen without efforts, and worse, thinking than doing the dirty work to earn your place in this planet is a bad thing. I did go through hell and back, but all of it is better than buying into the notion of what this society seems to think my place in this world should be. Life can be hard, but not always. Best wishes and welcome to adulthood.

And? Are you one of those who seem to think that diversity doesn't include blondes?

No, but I guess it depends on the city. Some welcome diversity, some don't. Some offer more opportunities for providers, increasing the chances of having more variety. I depends on the city.

I agree with others about not asking to hook up. What will happen if he says no, or worse, he says no in a tone that doesn't make you feel very good? That's a possibility. I've felt great chemistry with some of my providers, but I think there's some kind of boudary that should be kept, considering that it's a business for the provider. I'm sure providers don't want to be placed in a position where they might have to reject you, with the risk that it might escalate into an unsavory situation.

Not really. Doesn't look too enticing to me.

IMO, that's quite a valid reason to hire and for providers to have interest in you as a client. No need to give the provider all the context. Part of their job is to make you comfortable and provide you with a pleasant experience. That's their specialty. They will not find it weird at all. I'm sure you're not the first. Have fun and stay safe.

Personally I don't use app, I only use RM for hiring, and I just do what I've always done, good old-fasion in-person cruising. It still works.

Since day one, reason why I've never bothered with it.

Normally when something like that ocurs is because the police has a specific interest in a specific person or in a scpecific activity by a person or a group of people. Another reason might be politics, some city Mayor or government authority might want to crack down on certain activites as part of his image or platform. The use of a real provider for those purposes might only happen if that provider is in trouble with the law and becomes a CI to the police, which again, might be in the interest of a larger crack down on something else. The police just doesn't have the resources to crack down on providers simply because some activities are against the law. Look around and try to see where in the scale of priorities crimes committed in this setting might have in comparisson with so many others. A good example of how low of a priority entrapment of clients is, is what's going on in my city. In my city people are getting raped and killed in the subway, an entire neighborhood is full of homeless people walking like zombies out of addictions and related issues. Illegal use of fire arms are out of control, hit-and-run killings in roads are increasing in parts of the city, and that's not to mention white-collar crimes. From that point of view, it's unlikely that the already limited resources be used for that purpose, unless there is a political agenda behind it, or is part of a larger investigation.

Sometimes I have laughed at names, sometimes because they are clever and sometimes I laugh at them, but the only time that I skip a provider because of the name is because it's misleading. If there's a name like BigHungTop4and the profile says "bottom" and "4 inches", then I skip.

Ageism. Some providers do discriminate and treat men of certain age differently, and that include providers who are over 40. Age discrimination has been quite common in this world and in the gay community in general for quite some time now. You might not be too aware because it might not be in your mind, that might not be how you think, but it's present.

In that case, there shouldn't be any problem. You might not be the first client who likes one more than the other. That also means that the one you like better might have his own way of communicating, independent to the other. Be discreet, just in case.

When I've been out of the USA, I've met providers who indeed don't include USA in their visits. The reason one of them gave me is that he has plenty of business outside the US (mostly in Europe, but he goes to Japan) and he's doing well. He's not "avoiding" the USA, he's just too busy. The other told me that he tried it and wasn't too successful because of the language issue, which in other countries doesn't seem to be as much of an issue as it is in the USA (his thoughts, not mine). Interestingly, when in Barcelona, I actually met a provider from DC. He said that he makes good money, enough to maintain his apartment in Spain and his living place in DC. He says that there's a "more laid back atmosphere" there (my reply to that was: "In Barcelona, Spain? Are you sure?"). He seemed happy and levelheaded. As for thinking that there is an overall sector of the provided population that avoids the USA or the reasons, I'm not sure that I put a lot of thought in it. I could only guess, and my guess might be similar to why many wealthy travelers avoid USA, or come to USA just to be able to say that they visited it. The American way of living is not for everybody. Some are successful, some are not. Some like it, some don't. There might also be fear over coming to the USA with only a visa and ending up arrested for illegal practices. Just my thoughts.

Good to know. I'll be in Dubling in September. I'm looking around for how things look over there.

I have to agree with pubic_assistance. Doesn't look like you will get your money back. Without giving you a lecture about deposits or no deposits, what I wonder is why that conversation happened after the deposit was made? If you are ok with the deposit, it should be used to ensure the appointment, and the appointment should be locked only after you have that discussion, when you have a higher degree of certainty of what to expect. It's not about the deposit, it's about the timing. Why giving a deposit before having that conversation?

Good advice. My initial contact is simple, polite and to the point. It's made for the conversation to start. What happens after has depended on the type of response that I get. it's a two-way street, and if I don't like the way the reply comes across, I'd politely end the conversation. It's supposed to be a mutual agreement with mutual comfort for both. That's the best way for both parties to get what they want..

Probably he increased his price and didn't want to tell you. Probably he makes more money with extras, meaning that you should have actually touched him so he can negotiate more for more. Or maybe he just can afford choosing his clients. It's never good to feel rejected, but I don't think it's that deep. It may have nothing to do with you. You are you and there's nothing wrong with you talking, if others don't like it, it's their choice.