Simon Suraci

Happy Birthday @mike carey! On your birthday: If it rains, let it be cum If it pours, let it be true Should another year pass May the time skip you But not the cum Or the view

^This is quite common on MN. Without context, the comment means nothing. I do not take these comments seriously as they indicate 9x out of 10 an inexperienced, unprofessional, low quality provider writing off a potentially good client for no reason. A good provider won’t pay any heed to such a flippant comment. You need not worry about these. If anything, it filters out the bad providers from booking you. My favorite is: “time waiste”. That’s when I really roll my eyes. You’re dodging a bullet with those. ^Yes. For the Nth time, Mr Number is NOT designed as, or used as, a review platform, a referral platform, or a place to promote clients. The actual purpose of Mr Number is to report fraud, spam, and scams. While some of us like myself also use the app for what it’s designed for, to report fraud and scams, providers mainly use it for our own purposes as a warning beacon only. The good ones among us only report really serious problems, like stalking behavior. I detail more of those situations upthread. The unspoken rule is: warn others about really bad client behavior, especially with regard to safety and unreliability. If he’s ok to see, say nothing. So yes, you’re going to see negative comments if you see any at all. It makes no sense to “refer” a client to the whole world of other good and bad providers by talking him up on Mr Number. It takes us extra time to do that. We want to keep good clients to ourselves, not cut into our business by attracting other providers to him. Also we don’t want to lead our clients into the hands of bad providers who see a positive comment and decide take advantage of him in some way. Some comments are legit and definitely reflect consistently bad client behaviors. I can usually tell when this is the case by the way the provider wrote it, and of course how many times others post similar things or agree with the previous comments. Those are mostly right and we steer clear of the problem client. The good providers among us reserve our comments for really bad stuff, not something stupid like he sent some annoying texts or decided not to book after all. The bad providers abuse the system. When I see a flippant negative comment, I see the client anyway. When he turns out to be a good client that doesn’t exhibit the behavior referenced in the comment (which tbh is most of the time with flippant comments), I post a new comment on him under the “not fraud” category saying something brief to the effect of negating the previous comments with positive statements and affirm it is safe to see this client. I do this out of kindness. Nobody is rewarding me for it. I want my clients to have a good experience hiring. Good clients deserve to see others they want to see. More power to them. I would not expect even a small percentage of other providers to spend any time going out of their way to do this for their clients. It takes extra time and effort (even a little), and most providers are unwilling to spend that extra time and effort. Maybe it never crosses their minds in the first place. Also, I don’t tell my clients I am doing this for them. Most clients don’t know Mr Number exists, and for everyone’s sake, that’s really for the best.

No. We don’t see who buddy listed us. We do see client profile views, but you can turn that feature off in settings if you wish.

No.

Speaking from experience here. I am a provider. From time to time, virgins hire me for their first time and they absolutely loved it. Younger and older alike. Last week, in fact, a 40+ yo virgin hired me for what some others here have suggested: a slow, go-at-your-own-pace approach with an emphasis on intimacy, trust, and feeling completely comfortable. Hiring a provider gives you the space and safety you need to explore your interests without judgment and take things at your own pace. It’s empowering. It helps build your confidence. My client wants to have sex soon, but on his own terms. He hired me outcall for an hour of naked cuddling and chatting, which turned into two. Amazing how time flies with these things. He commented how amazing it felt to be naked, entangled with another man, without any pressure, expectations, or agenda. I gave him his first kiss, and it was magical. Then I gave him an hour of massage on my table. He was really happy. This was his birthday gift to himself. I am a masseur and an escort. I happen to fit into the slim overlap of men who excel at both. Most of the time you have to choose between the two. Both options can be good. Fortunately for him, he likes both and gets both with me. The most important thing is hiring the RIGHT provider for you. That applies to any client, but especially for an inexperienced one. For others reading, I personally recommend hiring an escort. Masseurs can be all over the map in what they offer and how they deliver service. Communicate clearly upfront with your provider about your situation and what you hope to get out of the experience. Be specific wherever possible. Seek out providers with experience specifically with virgins, who understand your needs and respect your boundaries. You need someone who really cares. Also, don’t rush. Consider hiring him to cuddle, kiss, or go on a date together. Take as many appointments as you need to feel comfortable. Consider longer appointments. Some of us (myself included) offer companionship at a lower rate than typical sex work hourly rates. That may be best for some of the clients needing to start slow. You don’t have to “get it over with” in an hour. Your first time is special. You will remember it vividly for the rest of your life, and it will shape how you view sex and intimacy going forward. That’s a really special moment. Savor it. Don’t rush. Get the RIGHT guy. Only when you feel ready, that’s when you get to have sex for the first time. On your own terms, and for your own pleasure. Then you get to take your new level of confidence and perspective and apply it to the “real” world of dating, friends, hookups, bars, or wherever you go. The value of that service extends well beyond however many sessions you hire. It follows you and benefits you as you navigate through the world. You can’t buy confidence, experience, or patience, but man does an escort smooth over a path for you to take hold of all the things in life you really want.

No. Pay his rate. That is all you’re responsible for. Enjoy!

Hire pros with good reputations. Nobody worth their salt is going to judge you, ignore you, or swipe your money after failing to perform. Do your research to minimize your risk of disappointment. Professionals work with all ages and body types. Empathy and chemistry drive us. Porn can be good in some situations and not in others. I find it distracting, personally. There is no one size fits all.

Well said 👏 👏 👏 Take notes, gentlemen.

When asking for more and higher levels of service, it would be appropriate to offer more compensation, or to ask him what would be an acceptable fee. That’s a more fair value proposition. I’m assuming he’s already going way above and beyond for you for a massage fee. Good on your masseur for drawing a line and protecting himself from you taking advantage of his already very high level of generosity. And he did it politely. A lot of us wouldn’t have handled your message so well.

Your relationship is client-provider. I recommend keeping it that way. It can get really messy trying to change the nature of the relationship to a personal one. More than likely it will negatively impact your hiring relationship where either or both of you are uncomfortable with the status quo after introducing personal feelings, and you both lose out on what you want. You’re willing to pay for his time, which you already do. Now you just want a different kind of service during that time. No harm, no foul. He’s kissing you as part of his service. He’s delivering value to you giving you something you like for compensation. Some masseurs are comfortable with kissing, some aren’t. You’re fortunate that he is. Is this making it too romantic for you? Can you enjoy the kissing for what it is, or is it too personal or romantic for you? You said he doesn’t escort. Is that an assumption or have you discussed this in detail with him? By escort I mean capital E Escort, as in accompanying a client to social and leisure activities. Consider asking him a different way than “do you escort?” That word means different things to different people. For a lot of us the term is interchangeable with “sex worker”, which carries a lot of baggage. Escorting may or may not include sex. It often does include sex before/during/after social and leisure activities, but merely having sex with a client for an hour is not truly escorting. It’s sex work. Going on some form of a date with a client for a fee is escorting. Sooo…you could propose to your masseur paying him for his time to do __xyz__ platonic activities together. I would avoid explicitly romantic situations and sex, at least at first. Keep it to platonic activities and see what he says. The worst he could say is no. Ask yourself if you could handle him saying no. Would you still feel comfortable with the status quo of seeing him for massage and kissing? If you can confidently and honestly say “yes”, then go for it! If he does agree to entertain you for compensation for activities other than massage, it can (but may not) lead to more over time. Just be clear about your mutual boundaries up front. Let him take the lead on pushing or breaking those boundaries, never you. And if he never does, be ok with it and enjoy hiring him for his company. You’re only paying him for the things he has agreed to do with you. If you can’t handle navigating these boundaries and respecting a potential “no”, it’s best to keep to the status quo. You don’t want to mess up a good thing.

I enjoy it when clients give me their clear, enthusiastic consent. The more ways you can indicate you like what is happening in the session, the better. For example: Moans, groans, gasps, whimpers, swearing, and other vocalizations expressing your pleasure. These are the best. It makes it very clear you are enjoying yourself and want more. It’s more difficult to misinterpret these than anything else. Changes in your breathing. I don’t mean falling asleep, per se, but that is fine too. Short intense breaths when you’re excited, or long intentional breaths when you’re focused on relaxing your body, like a meditation. Heavy sighs. Vocalizations with your breathing and sighs. Raising your hips, when face down or face up. It doesn’t take much to get the message across. You can be subtle. Shift the angle of your hips, arch your lower back a little. Shift slightly from side to side. Some men are extreme about this. I call it stink bugging, and it’s comical. Some go so extreme they end up on all fours. You don’t need to go that far. With your hip signals, go for the verbal equivalent of a whisper rather than a scream. Adjusting your cock downward when face down to provide access. Or start on the table positioned this way. Many of my clients do. Squeezing my hand when I am holding yours. Interlocking fingers. Reciprocal touching when my body is on/near your hand, like brushing against my torso or lightly stroking my cock. Gently touching my legs or other parts of my body. Not “grabbing”, aggressively “pulling”, scratching, slapping, etc. Gentle, sensual touch is best. Even better when clients verbalize directly like, “Is it ok to touch you?” or “I like that.” I’m sure I’ll think of more. There are so many ways to indicate interest and pleasure. Lots of subtle cues. Masseurs willing to do more on the sensual and erotic spectrum will clearly get the message and indulge you. Those who won’t will refrain, but it’s pretty hard to misinterpret all these signs. When your masseur is not responding in any way to your cues, it means he is not going there. Let it go and move on. Enjoy the massage for what it is.

Suggestion: merge with the topic below. This is a duplicate topic. rentmasseur is combining erotic and sensual on the 20th Bear in mind political discussions are not allowed. Yes, it’s quite obvious what is going on with the date but we can’t talk about it here on the forums.

Great news, thank you for clarifying all these points! You’ve shown yourself to be an experienced, knowledgeable, and thoughtful client. Always a positive to hear about these win-win scenarios. No need to edit, especially if you have their ok to post. Understood on limits of what you can post on Reddit, makes sense. To all else, enjoy your hiring and please be mindful about compensating your masseurs equitably. We can discuss the nuances of how on other threads. I’ll butt out now. Back to your regularly scheduled programming re: favorite masseur hires of 2024

@Typical I have a lot of opinions about your post above, but it’s off topic here so I will hold off. I don’t want to sidetrack this topic more than I already have. I’m happy to discuss on a thread on that topic or privately.

@Dr.Daddy thanks for sharing your story. Sounds like you had a great time! The classic massage turns into hardcore sex fantasy. Did you pay these guys equitable rates like you would for a full service escort? Or tip as if you were? Or at least offer? I hate to be a ‘nag’ about it but I feel a responsibility to advocate for our profession. Without the context of what you’re paying, stories like this perpetuate the expectation that masseurs can/should offer escort services for a massage fee, which is often around half the going rate of an escort. It puts tons of pressure on masseurs to give way more than they should for their fees and on the other side of the coin it devalues escort services. I realize it’s a fantasy come true and it’s supposed to be fun, but this is one of many example stories influencing how clients think, which in turn has real life consequences for professional masseurs and escorts. It makes our jobs a lot more difficult.

3hr max response time under any circumstances is unrealistic. Give it a day.

RentMasseur He’s block happy, but in the opposite direction than usual. Blocks you if you’re not available to give him a massage when he asks for one. Super weird. Any experience with Pete?

@moonlight It depends on your relationship. How close were you to him in the past? A casual acquaintance, friend-of-a-friend, or someone you barely knew, or someone you haven’t seen in many years? I personally would have no problem seeing someone like this as a client. Anyone particularly close to me in the past or present I would not see. My estranged best friend, for example, I would definitely not see. People in my acquaintance zone over the years would have to number in the thousands. A lot of them I would see if they wanted, of course respecting their discretion, and expecting the same from them toward me. One of my clients (70s) told me he saw a family friend’s son (40s) advertising on RentMen. He knew the guy as a child and their families did a lot together. The provider’s parents and family don’t know he escorts. After coming across the RentMen ad, the client asked the parents some casual questions about the provider, how he’s doing, what work he is doing, etc. The parents clearly believe their son is doing some other kind of work, and that’s something the client should respect and not meddle in. The client is attracted to the provider and considered for a moment hiring him but the previous relationship made it too weird. This is one case where I would agree. It’s too weird. Everyone is a case-by-case though. Privacy goes both ways. Professional providers will not violate your privacy and you are not violating his by hiring him. Avoid speaking about it in your mutual circles. Should he be uncomfortable for any reason, he can choose to say no. We’re all adults here. I would at least give him the courtesy of telling him who you are ahead of time, though so he can make that decision for himself. Being open and honest up front saves you both the respective indignities of being caught off guard in the moment, and having to be let down face to face in such a personal, raw way. He won’t ‘out’ you as a man that hires, or a man into men. Really, he has at least as much to lose by mentioning anything to mutual contacts. If he’s a professional, he will keep quiet about the whole thing, whether he chooses to see you or not. Do you interact with him now? Would you want to interact with him in the future outside the context of hiring him? If the answer is yes, tread lightly. There’s a lot more at stake. If the answer is no, I see very little for you to lose. The worst thing that would happen is he says no, and that’s that. Nothing is really any different than it was before. You have something to gain, however, if he says yes, and so does he. No harm, no foul. Most people are decent and good. I would expect no harm to befall you for asking. Show respect. Maintain healthy boundaries. All will be well.

In the United States, the term ‘mulato’ is racist and offensive. Full stop. Any cursory google search will confirm.

https://rent.men/Elioknightxxx One of my clients requested Elio for a threesome during his travel dates to our city. I reached out on the client’s behalf. I texted both his phone numbers. One of them is WhatsApp, which I don’t use. After no response for a few days I tried messaging him on RentMen. Same thing, days later and no response. I sent him a link to my ad for reference with my first message. I see he viewed my RentMen profile so he definitely got the message. He just chose not to respond. Hope you all have better luck with communicating with him. He just ignored me after multiple attempts. 😔 If anyone sees him, please share. Expired thread for reference. He’s on RentMasseur too.

Clients, show us, then. Take that cake!

Damian takes the cakes. And displays them mightily.

I got the email too. This is not about RentMasseur responding to client confusion over sensual vs erotic services. It’s certainly a real concern and many of you have hit the nail on the head saying there is no standard regarding sensual or erotic. Fine. That’s the official story. This is sadly just one symptom of many, like Visa blacklisting adult businesses, and PornHub responding to crazy new laws requiring adults to fork over their privacy to view adult content by no longer offering access in those states. The real problem is how people in the United States publicly treat sex work. Plenty of us privately respect and enjoy it, but publicly decry its very existence. We will only see more of this behavior until the majority of our society supports policies that acknowledge sex work as work and sex workers as dignified members of society with the right to offer services to meet the most basic and universal of human needs. Also, human trafficking is not synonymous with all sex work, as many argue and believe. If we were safe enough to be more open about sex work services, it would be a lot easier to identify and prosecute human trafficking.

The problem with this question is that the OP expects a valuable service above and beyond a massage for free. ANY time of day works just fine when you’re offering to pay your provider’s rate for the service you want. Expecting him to give you what others will gladly pay appropriate rates for is a recipe for disappointment. Find out what it takes to be his priority and agree to it. Is it a generous tip? A specific rate? That way you get to be the one he’s saving it for that day. Let some other moe be the disappointed one begging for freebies. Your provider turns him down in order to honor you by making sure he can optimally perform for you, at whatever time of day works best for you. You might get lucky here and there on a day or time when he isn’t otherwise committed, and feels like he can afford to entertain you. When he does, tip well and he will be more likely to give you a high level of service the next time. We self regulate every day around who is booking what and when. There is no consistently good time of day to ask for - or expect - freebies because clients are dictating these things. We respond and adapt accordingly. Ask yourself: “do I value this service? Then ask yourself: “how much?” Then ask your provider: “how much?” Make a decision based on the answers.

Newell is a friend of mine and I know him well. We work together here and there. I’ve mentioned this sentiment to him before, of him looking somewhat intimidating in his ads. He really isn’t like that in person at all. He’s a good guy. Happy to answer any questions about Newell.