Simon Suraci

I typically craft my initial reply to address everything in the client’s initial text that I can answer. I usually start by pasting a stock response and then modifying to personalize, answering anything else the client brought up. How we reply definitely matters and I believe makes a difference in my business. I try to answer the what, where, when, and how much questions so the client has all the basic information to make a decision. I also make an effort to be friendly, but this doesn’t always translate easily in text form. Tone varies, but I avoid mirroring the gruff, sometimes rude messages I receive. I try not to take it personally. By putting in a lot of effort responding thoughtfully to tons of messages that never go anywhere, I pick up the good clients along the way and keep them as reliable regulars requiring less maintenance. The bad ones drop off once they make themselves known. It takes work up front, including lots of annoying exchanges and dealing with rude people. However, I will never win those good clients over if I just reply with a rate. It’s like mining for gold. Lots of long, patient sediment sifting. I can’t complain to the gold flecks about all the dirt I had to pan out to find them. Every once in a while I even find a nugget. It’s work doing the work, but it’s also work getting the work. When you do enough of both, your schedule fills up and you reap the rewards. The strategy I like best is to make yourself so busy with good regulars that you don’t have to deal with the bad apples. They can’t occupy space in your schedule or your mind! It takes years of patience to get there. People on these forums are, on average, better clients than who we deal with on a daily basis. Anyone spending time asking questions about the best way to craft a message to a provider is going to be levels of magnitude better to work with than the guys we sometimes complain about. Providers mention the rude, unserious, flaky, or people outright taking advantage of us all the time, but most of you here are not those people. It’s unfortunate you have to be the recipients of so much disdain when you represent fewer of the reasons for us feeling our frustrations. You are here reading and listening when the people that most need to hear it would never take the time nor give the bandwidth to hear it out, much less take it to heart. The times I post about bad actor clients I relent later, thinking this is the wrong audience. With few exceptions, my COM clients are great men. I’m sorry you guys have to bear the brunt of so many providers venting about things a lot of you here you either don’t do, or correct when you learn from collective wisdom here how to better conduct yourselves. Thank you for being the best clients.

For all of the above: please clarify is this for a 60 min, 90 min, or 120 min session?

Anyone here have experience with red light therapy? With a wellness professional, or maybe with a provider? I know some providers incorporating red light into their therapeutic m4m bodywork services and their clients are benefiting. I bought a red light therapy wand for myself and I found it helps with muscle soreness and inflammation. The rest of the claims I have not had experience with yet to see if they are true. Some providers swear by it. I liken the sentiment to Gus from My Big Fat Greek Wedding saying “Put some windex on it”. Among the many alleged benefits: Pain Relief - Eases chronic pain conditions, such as arthritis and fibromyalgia - Reduces muscle soreness and inflammation Hair Growth - Promotes hair growth - Treats hair loss conditions Wound Healing - Enhances tissue regeneration and accelerates wound closure - Reduces scarring and hyperpigmentation Skin Health - Improves skin tone and texture - Treats acne and rosacea - Accelerates wound healing - Reduces wrinkles and fine lines Also, *may*: - Improve mood and reduce anxiety - Enhance athletic performance - Promote bone growth and healing

Thank you all for your great suggestions. As expected, we were only able to cover a fraction of the topics I would have liked to during the limited time we had. While I sent a long list of questions and subtopics to inspire the hosts, it was ultimately up to them to select what they most wanted to ask. As always, you are all welcome to “ask me anything” any time. I realized after listening that I mispoke when I plugged this site, saying THE company of men dot org (when it’s simply companyofmen.org). Sorry about that. I know that it’s the latter but goofed up in the moment. People will find us here, I’m sure. A quick google and it will pop up, with or without the “The”. Here is the podcast for any who are interested in listening to the interview. The interview portion starts right at 16:00 minutes in, if you want to skip their intro stuff, news stuff, etc. Gayish: 463 Sex Workers (w/ Simon Suraci) PODCASTS.APPLE.COM Podcast Episode · Gayish Podcast · 11/06/2025 · 1h 17m

This sentiment unfortunately represents a minority on these boards. If we spent half as much energy here talking about actual talent than we do how old a guy is or what he weighs, or how big his dick is, or how much sex he will give for a massage fee, we could power a city indefinitely!

Totally agree with what Jamie said. I answer calls, but not random unexpected ones. All I ask is for clients to schedule a mutually agreeable time for their call. Then I will pick up. It’s easy to schedule a call using text to request a time. Or email, or whatever platform they are contacting me on. If they are totally averse to written communication, they can simply leave me a voicemail and I will call them back when I am able. I leave them a voicemail when they can’t take my call right away. I don’t understand why this is so complicated. I think part of the problem is that some clients expect us to be available at any time they want. We aren’t.

I have a room at InnDulge booked that weekend. I’m not sure yet if I will attend.

Same here. I prefer to book clients in advance. Same day is a crapshoot.

Saw this above an airport urinal the other day and made me ponder 🤔… Are we really at the point in our civilization where we have to post signs in public places saying essentially: “DON’T DRINK THE TOILET WATER” ?

Business investor client asks me to breed him. I oblige him, making a large deposit. I notice his Venmo transaction memo: ”Seed Money”

Yes. I’ll follow up once it’s available.

A podcast is interviewing me soon. We’re going to talk about m4m sex work. The audience is primarily gay men and other LGBTQ+ folks, but isn’t as knowledgeable as most of you here on The Company of Men. Most of them have never hired a masseur or sex worker before. They will want to know all the basics. It’s hard for me to step back and put myself in the shoes of someone who knows almost nothing about the profession, or perhaps has misconceptions about our work. What questions would you ask me? What do you think I should cover? Is there anything you would like other men who are interested in men to know about hiring? Any advice for them? Some topic ideas: General What is sex work? Who does sex work? Who hires sex work? Why is sex work important and valuable? Is sex work really work? Economics How much do sex workers make? Why does it cost so much? What about discounts? Do I tip my sex worker? How much? How do I receive the best value for my money? Do sex workers pay taxes? What methods of payment can I use? Risks, Personal Safety Is sex work legal? Is sex work safe? What about STIs? Will I get in trouble? Are sex workers discreet? Will anyone find out? How do sex workers screen? How do I select a good sex worker? How do I avoid fraud and scams? Practical Matters Cum Erections Performance Stamina Hygiene Sex roles, preferences Communication Expectations Other Why do you do this work? Do sex workers have romantic relationships?

I couldn’t have said it better. I have the same experience as you organizing groups for my clients. The porn stars, content creators, insta-gays, and similar types are often the worst hires, that is, if they show up at all. So flaky. Some won’t respond to a legit straightforward business inquiry, and others are too precious about basic details. These guys sure are beautiful on the outside, but make for lousy (and flaky!) providers. My opinion is clients are better off enjoying these guys’ porn and saving their bigger dollars for experienced providers who take in-person work seriously, who actually care about making clients feel good. Some of them in this group will have chiseled abs and look like they are in their 20s, but they are a minority. You don’t always have to choose one or the other, but if you want a quality experience, a lot of the insta gay looking guys won’t fit the bill, or even show up at all!

Has anyone else noticed something fishy going on with Ben’s RentMasseur reviews? Frequency and consistency. No more than a week goes by, often only 2-3 days and he has a new review. This is unheard of in our industry. Note the rapid cluster of many positive reviews in a short period between July and early October, and really overall since the account was created in April 2025. Note frequent near-identical positive phrases and strong superlatives (“Totally worth it”, “Very relaxing”, “best deep tissue massage”) across multiple entires. Doctored reviews often reuse the same winning phrases. Many reviews support or justify his less popular policies among most clients like providing client photos or sending deposits as a condition to book. To each his own regarding how they decide to screen clients, but the fishy part is how quick his clients are to defend his booking policies. Reviews contain few, if any typos, or grammatical errors. It’s surprising when clients type up perfectly organized, paragraphed review messages, on a consistent basis. He had little time in either Charlotte (pre-move) or Denver (post-move) to build up a strong, consistent client base. It’s unusual to have so much business so quickly, much less to have so many of his clients reviewing so consistently, in both cities. Maybe some of the reviews are genuine, but I can’t help but wonder if any of these guys booked based on the large number of other reviews exhibiting telltale signs of manipulation. Just my armchair gumshoe take. What do you long time forum members think? If it’s genuine, good for him. If it’s not, all of this will catch up to him eventually.

CoM members represent an odd man out contingency. Most of the clients here are thoughtful and respectful, and many of you take time to review ads more carefully. The average client doesn’t, and certainly not the least common denominator. It also depends on how interested a client is in someone based solely on the photos whether they will take the next step to read the whole ad or visit any links to learn more. The more info we can include directly on the ad, the more likely the average viewer is to view or take note of it. Clicking through a link is easy, but it does present a psychological barrier that will stop some from proceeding.

Got it. RM uses sneaky language; they make it seem like you have to be a logged-in member AND pay the premium subscription fee to view provider nudes. Many would be clients won’t know this and either give up on viewing providers’ nudes (probably most) or go ahead and pay the small unnecessary premium. RM wins gravy money while providers lose out on prospective business. Great idea. This is one way to work around it, just like linking to the provider’s business website. Unfortunately only a fraction of viewers will click through to visit a twitter or other social page or a business website. Given the number of clients who only look at pictures and don’t read the ad copy before contacting, it might be reaching for the stars to ask someone to go to a social platform or website.

Did a little experiment today uploading a naughty photo to my public gallery. It shows on my end when I am signed in that the photo is in my public gallery and visible. When I log out and view my ad, the naughty photo is blurred and when I click on it, the site prompts me to upgrade to view it. RM is deliberately showing advertisers one thing and clients another. I’m boycotting by not posting nudes until RM changes their policy.

It’s so true. In Dallas, 20 or even 30 miles away is nothing. In San Diego, 20 miles may as well be Phoenix or Vegas. I agree. It’s a read the room situation. Some clients like aftercare, which I am glad to provide. Conversation, cuddling, contact, and sometimes round two. A handful of my clients can keep going one orgasm after another many times over, and so we keep going til the time is up, or I have physically exhausted him, whichever occurs first.

He viewed my private photos on RentMasseur, then blocked me 😆 What is going through people’s minds when they block someone on the other side of the country they don’t know and have never talked to? Strange 🫠

I love these sessions. I agree with much of what others have already said. It’s much less frequent for me (almost everyone wants sex-and, or sex-only), but I enjoy the men hiring me for dinner dates, cuddling, chatting, and other forms of general companionship. So many men need safety, a no judgment zone, and to be heard and seen.

He’s clearly wanting people to consent to be filmed for content. Don’t be surprised if he has narrow criteria for who he wants filmed.

I usually charge my rate x2, x3, etc. I work this agreement out ahead of time with the providers I am coordinating to join for 4-hand and for group play sessions. Charging a consistent rate makes it easier for everyone and there are no negative feelings about getting paid less than someone else to do the same job. Some clients prefer to pay each provider directly rather than the usual format of paying me and I distribute. Paying each guy directly works nicely for when the guys are charging different rates. Nobody has to know who is getting paid what. The guys may still ask (and tell) one another, but not always. Labeled envelopes are good for distributing cash to each provider quickly and discreetly. Digital payments are more of a hassle in this regard. One of the guys I work with charges a $50/hr premium to participate in groups or to see a client couple. His regular rate is the same as mine and the other guys joining, but he was unwilling to do the job without the premium. Kind of a prima donna attitude, but it happens sometimes. I didn’t make a big deal of this with the other providers. I knew because I was coordinating the session, but nobody else did, and it was smooth sailing. It doesn’t bother me whatsoever that someone is charging less or more than me. Everyone is getting paid their respective rates. As long as the client is happy with what he is paying and each provider is happy with what he is receiving, all is well. Others may have more of a grumbling spirit over rate differences, but not me. As long as the client pays me my rate, I’m good.

One of my clients hired Nick for a group play session in San Diego. After sharing the client’s wishlist, he said the client is high maintenance, which to be honest, in many respects, is fair. In any case, Nick agreed to join. This was a week or more ahead. I followed up two days before to confirm our time. He asked for another reminder which I sent about half a day before our meeting time. 15 mins before our meeting time, he texts saying he is running 15 mins behind and for sure will be there by then if the client still wants to meet. I agreed and asked the client and other hired guy wait up. Time comes and no Nick. I reach out asking if he is still on his way. Nothing. 30 mins past our start time we give up and decide to start without him. I tell Nick as much with a text. Sure enough, halfway through the session Nick messaged saying he was 10 mins away. I see it after the session ends and he apologized saying he prides himself on professionalism, blah blah blah. He didn’t miss out on anything. The other hired guy was completely unprepared. Literally unwashed, dirty butt inside and out. Then lied about it later saying he was shocked there was any problem, that he had spent a long time prepping, gaslighting me. Smelled like rank musky beef jerky. Who in their right mind goes to a session expecting to take a dick, especially anything of the proportions of Nick Capra’s without first making any effort to prepare? It blows my mind the things I see in this business. Sometimes I feel like the only professional in the room. Scratch Nick off the list. This is why I shy away from content creators and porn stars. A lot of them don’t take their in person work very seriously, if they offer in person services at all.