Worst Ever Massage

[Kody S]

I have mostly had excellent experiences with guys vetted through this site. So thank you all. However features of some early massages that made me wise up are: masseurs who promised 90minutes and gave me only 40, music that was Inappropriate (one guy tried to massage me to the sound track to a war movie), a guy who talked too much as if I was his therapist (is it my job to make him not feel lonely?), someone who massages me with one hand and texted with the other, a guy that really turned me on and who massaged nude but made it clear—do not touch! a masseur who wanted to talk to me about breaking up with his fiancée after the massage was over (including too many détails about their sex life), a guy whose pictures were at best from a former life that has long since past, and a couple of guys who assumed I was there for their gratification and had no real skill or intention of massaging me at all. All of these are actually quite funny now because they taught me to what’s out there... and be very selective about who I hired with my hard earned money. Fortunately, these have been in the minority.

[DallasFootFtshAthlete]

Years ago before so many web sites, I tried a guy in Dallas (think his name was Rocky...slender guy who I think also escorted) instead of my regular guy just for something different. Soft massage no sensuality no conversation. Was so unfulfilled, I called my regular guy immediately and went and saw him within 15 minutes before I went back to work.

 

I got a massage from Rocky in Dallas as well. He had massage ads everywhere back the late 90s so I decided to try him out. He came to my house, and before starting the massage he asked if he could change clothes in the bathroom. I'm not sure what he did in there, but he didn't come out until almost 30 minutes later. He didn't have the big chest that was the centerpiece of all his ads, but I was more interested in a good massage than anything else. Unfortunately he used next no to pressure and basically just rubbed his hand on my back and arms. It wasn't a good massage and I just figured I'd let him finish, pay him, and never book him again.

 

Not two weeks later he had a new ad which had my chest picture in it as his (I had sent him a chest pic when we initially traded emails; he had asked for a pic and I wasn't comfortable sending my face pic to someone I didn't know. I emailed him and confronted him about it and much to my surprise he admitted he used my pic, apologized, and never did it again. So I don't remember my experience with him as being horrible, but it was definitely odd.

[Inkdnaija00]

My worst, was one of my first years ago.

 

https://rentmasseur.com/Glen

 

disheveled hotel room

 

Messy bathroom

 

He just finished eating Chinese food, so the room smelled like the shrimp fried rice and other food he left on the unmade bed and the half eaten food containers were in the bed.

oiled me up with dollar-store Brand baby oil and proceeded to give me repetitive massage strokes for about 40 minutes while he was watching an episode of Scandal and checking text messages with his other hand.

That's terrible

[Rockey]

My worst, was one of my first years ago.

 

https://rentmasseur.com/Glen

 

disheveled hotel room

 

Messy bathroom

 

He just finished eating Chinese food, so the room smelled like the shrimp fried rice and other food he left on the unmade bed and the half eaten food containers were in the bed.

oiled me up with dollar-store Brand baby oil and proceeded to give me repetitive massage strokes for about 40 minutes while he was watching an episode of Scandal and checking text messages with his other hand.

I had quite a few massages from Glen. I thought the massages were good and the endings very satisfying. But, you're right about the filthy hotel room, rotting food and stench. Shame, cause I had a thing for his body.

[Monarchy79]

I had quite a few massages from Glen. I thought the massages were good and the endings very satisfying. But, you're right about the filthy hotel room, rotting food and stench. Shame, cause I had a thing for his body.

 

I think that guys who are his type get a better experience with him.

I definitely learned a very valuable lesson from that experience, so it’s all good ☺️??

[tj_forplay]

I think the one I got today that was pretty bad. He was a nice guy, just no skill. Not to mention, the pictures in his ad didn't seem to match at all, there wasn't a face picture but the body shots wasn't the same, plus I think he tried to hide that by having the room pretty much pitch black. Also, I broke my rule of never pre paying, so it could've been that since he was already paid, he did the bare minimum.

[jeezifonly]

As they used to say on “Spartacus”

GRATITUDE

I’ve had several meh-ssages.

Only one that left me feeling screwed over was from a guy who had JUST moved. Like that morning. I think I booked 4 hrs ahead. (Thought me to book no less than 24...)

 

He should have said no and offered an appointment a few days later, and NOT booked anything. I tipped nada and explained why. Massage itself was among the mehs, but he had to use my time to hunt for everything, and hadn’t even unpacked a towel for the shower.

But he did have a pretty penis, bless his little cotton socks.

[big dale]

I think the one I got today that was pretty bad. He was a nice guy, just no skill. Not to mention, the pictures in his ad didn't seem to match at all, there wasn't a face picture but the body shots wasn't the same, plus I think he tried to hide that by having the room pretty much pitch black. Also, I broke my rule of never pre paying, so it could've been that since he was already paid, he did the bare minimum.

In the age of COVID? Ewwwww.

[tj_forplay]

In the age of COVID? Ewwwww.

Yup. It is what it is. I didn't for several months, but started again when my state started easing covid restrictions. But as someone else put it COVID is likely to be with us for a long time to come if not forever, Just like with communicable diseases, people make decisions based on acceptable risks. As time goes on, risks that people are willing to accept when it comes to COVID will change. Otherwise with all the communicable diseases that existed before covid, there should be no human to human contact at all, this industry wouldn't exist.

 

Do I take precautions? Yes. Am I judging people for risks they take? No.

[big dale]

Yup. It is what it is. I didn't for several months, but started again when my state started easing covid restrictions. But as someone else put it COVID is likely to be with us for a long time to come if not forever, Just like with communicable diseases, people make decisions based on acceptable risks. As time goes on, risks that people are willing to accept when it comes to COVID will change. Otherwise with all the communicable diseases that existed before covid, there should be no human to human contact at all, this industry wouldn't exist.

 

Do I take precautions? Yes. Am I judging people for risks they take? No.

Except unlike most other communicable diseases you could spend two weeks unknowingly infected and spread death to those close to you. So, there's that.

[stop]

I have two to share.

 

 

I think I may have shared this before: Once in PS I started talking to a guy at starbucks and in the course of the conversation found out he was a massage therapist sort of on the side. (He had a very impressive day job, so I set up an appointment. His house was one of the nicest houses I have ever been at, almost brand new and must have cost 5-6M easily. After I got there he set the house alarm system and we went into the massage room at the far end of the house. I got undressed, I always fold my clothing in a pile and put them on the chair that is available. The massage was fantastic one of the top 10, he was fully nude and had a really great body and had serious massage skills.

 

 

About ¾ of the way into the massage, the house alarm goes off, it was loud and like an evacuation alarm in office building and there were small lights flashing. He sort of ran, I jumped the fuck up and run to the chair not sure if the house was on fire, being broken into, or if Russia had just bombed us. I run to the chair where I had put my clothing and they are not there. The room is essentially pitch black except the candles and the small flashing lights but I couldn’t’ see where he moved my clothing to. My tennis shoes were still there under the chair, so I put on my shoes, grabbed the sheet on the table and started to exit the room. (all of this happened in seconds) I get to the door and the alarm stops and then I see him down the hallway and he turns and says what are you doing.

 

 

Now I am seconds from having a heart attack my adrenalin is pumping so much and I said I didn’t know what happened and his response was “oh that was just the 45 minute alarm so we know how much time is left” I didn’t even know how to respond. He walks me back to the room and says get back on the table so we can finish. Well at this point I am really have no interest in trying to calm down and potentially have the house alarm go off again in 15 minutes. I ask for my clothing which he gets from the closet, I get dressed, and pay him, when we get to the front door he pulls me into this fantastic kiss and says hope I see you again, I get out to my car and there is a text from him saying it’s too bad I had to leave he was looking forward to playing with me….WHAT? (by the way I almost got out of the car and walked back to the house he was that hot) my heart is beating a million beats a second still from the alarm I couldn’t even imagine how I would calm down.

 

 

The second was on a trip to Hawaii. This is pre me knowing about this site. Guy was highly recommended by a few folks and had a large ad in Frontiers (or whatever that magazine was called) . I show up, he is a good-looking guy, muscular we go to the massage room, I ask to use the restroom and he points me through the kitchen which looked like no dishes had been washed in over a decade. Bathroom was so/so clean. We had agreed to a 90 minute massage for 150

 

 

I return and he is fully undressed except for a stripper g string and dress shoes. I should have left but he was hot and filled out the g string very well and he was highly recommended. Red Flag 1, he did not shut the fuck up. He had a thick Russian accent which made it challenging enough to understand what he was saying but combine that with me trying to relax and there being music playing every 5 seconds I was saying “what?” , Red flag #2 he shoves his finger in my ass and starts playing with it. Now I love having things in there but fingers is not one of them. Before I could ask him to remove his finger, he trys to upsell me by saying fingering is an extra 20. I say I don’t like/enjoy it and would like him to stop. His response was to shove a second finger up and ask if that is better. I tell him no, I don’t like fingers, so he pulls out and asks if I want him to fuck me, it would only be 50 more. I say no, just the massage, so he grabs my hand and puts it on his dick which was rock hard and nice, and he says its only 30 if I want to beat him off. I move my hand away and say no I am not interested in upgrades today.

 

 

So then he takes this air thing that goes on your nose when you are breathing oxygen and puts it on me and turns on blueberry smelling oxygen, I pull it off and asked what he had just done, and he explained he does oxygen aromatherapy for just 5 per minute. I get up at this point and am outraged, I say was the oxygen line even clean, I told him I was done and had no interest in continuing, I got off the table and got dressed. Now mind you we are probably 30 minutes into a 90-minute session. I pull out 100 bucks and say here, I am leaving early, so he goes you owe me 180 bucks and I said I am not even staying an hour, I really should just be giving you 50. He has the balls to say, no you booked my time and that was 150, plus the fingering was 20 and 10 minutes of oxygen therapy was 10, that’s 180.

 

 

Now I am outraged because not only did I not ask for the upgrades I specifically said I didn’t want them. He is blocking the doorway and won’t let me open the door. He keep saying I owe him 180. Luckily for me he is wearing dress shoes because I am finally able to push him away on the carpet because he cannot get grip with his shoes. I bolt out of the apartment and literally ran 2 blocks in case he was chasing me wearing his g-string.

 

 

That night my buddy and I went to a bar and guess who is the gogo dancer, and he spots me and pushes his way through the crowd and starts shouting I owe him 130 bucks. Needless to say we had to leave that bar. I have never felt so violated in my life as I did with him.

[m4same]

I have two to share.

 

 

I think I may have shared this before: Once in PS I started talking to a guy at starbucks and in the course of the conversation found out he was a massage therapist sort of on the side. (He had a very impressive day job, so I set up an appointment. His house was one of the nicest houses I have ever been at, almost brand new and must have cost 5-6M easily. After I got there he set the house alarm system and we went into the massage room at the far end of the house. I got undressed, I always fold my clothing in a pile and put them on the chair that is available. The massage was fantastic one of the top 10, he was fully nude and had a really great body and had serious massage skills.

 

 

About ¾ of the way into the massage, the house alarm goes off, it was loud and like an evacuation alarm in office building and there were small lights flashing. He sort of ran, I jumped the fuck up and run to the chair not sure if the house was on fire, being broken into, or if Russia had just bombed us. I run to the chair where I had put my clothing and they are not there. The room is essentially pitch black except the candles and the small flashing lights but I couldn’t’ see where he moved my clothing to. My tennis shoes were still there under the chair, so I put on my shoes, grabbed the sheet on the table and started to exit the room. (all of this happened in seconds) I get to the door and the alarm stops and then I see him down the hallway and he turns and says what are you doing.

 

 

Now I am seconds from having a heart attack my adrenalin is pumping so much and I said I didn’t know what happened and his response was “oh that was just the 45 minute alarm so we know how much time is left” I didn’t even know how to respond. He walks me back to the room and says get back on the table so we can finish. Well at this point I am really have no interest in trying to calm down and potentially have the house alarm go off again in 15 minutes. I ask for my clothing which he gets from the closet, I get dressed, and pay him, when we get to the front door he pulls me into this fantastic kiss and says hope I see you again, I get out to my car and there is a text from him saying it’s too bad I had to leave he was looking forward to playing with me….WHAT? (by the way I almost got out of the car and walked back to the house he was that hot) my heart is beating a million beats a second still from the alarm I couldn’t even imagine how I would calm down.

 

 

The second was on a trip to Hawaii. This is pre me knowing about this site. Guy was highly recommended by a few folks and had a large ad in Frontiers (or whatever that magazine was called) . I show up, he is a good-looking guy, muscular we go to the massage room, I ask to use the restroom and he points me through the kitchen which looked like no dishes had been washed in over a decade. Bathroom was so/so clean. We had agreed to a 90 minute massage for 150

 

 

I return and he is fully undressed except for a stripper g string and dress shoes. I should have left but he was hot and filled out the g string very well and he was highly recommended. Red Flag 1, he did not shut the fuck up. He had a thick Russian accent which made it challenging enough to understand what he was saying but combine that with me trying to relax and there being music playing every 5 seconds I was saying “what?” , Red flag #2 he shoves his finger in my ass and starts playing with it. Now I love having things in there but fingers is not one of them. Before I could ask him to remove his finger, he trys to upsell me by saying fingering is an extra 20. I say I don’t like/enjoy it and would like him to stop. His response was to shove a second finger up and ask if that is better. I tell him no, I don’t like fingers, so he pulls out and asks if I want him to fuck me, it would only be 50 more. I say no, just the massage, so he grabs my hand and puts it on his dick which was rock hard and nice, and he says its only 30 if I want to beat him off. I move my hand away and say no I am not interested in upgrades today.

 

 

So then he takes this air thing that goes on your nose when you are breathing oxygen and puts it on me and turns on blueberry smelling oxygen, I pull it off and asked what he had just done, and he explained he does oxygen aromatherapy for just 5 per minute. I get up at this point and am outraged, I say was the oxygen line even clean, I told him I was done and had no interest in continuing, I got off the table and got dressed. Now mind you we are probably 30 minutes into a 90-minute session. I pull out 100 bucks and say here, I am leaving early, so he goes you owe me 180 bucks and I said I am not even staying an hour, I really should just be giving you 50. He has the balls to say, no you booked my time and that was 150, plus the fingering was 20 and 10 minutes of oxygen therapy was 10, that’s 180.

 

 

Now I am outraged because not only did I not ask for the upgrades I specifically said I didn’t want them. He is blocking the doorway and won’t let me open the door. He keep saying I owe him 180. Luckily for me he is wearing dress shoes because I am finally able to push him away on the carpet because he cannot get grip with his shoes. I bolt out of the apartment and literally ran 2 blocks in case he was chasing me wearing his g-string.

 

 

That night my buddy and I went to a bar and guess who is the gogo dancer, and he spots me and pushes his way through the crowd and starts shouting I owe him 130 bucks. Needless to say we had to leave that bar. I have never felt so violated in my life as I did with him.

Your pain is our entertainment. <deep sigh>

[stop]

Whatever happened to Josh Pig Texan Massage anyway? Noticed his ad his gone. Hopefully his unprofessional (putting it mildly) tactics caught up to him.

 

other than his incessant talking i always had a great time with Josh Pig Texan. I wonder what happened to him, its been a few years

[Luv2play]

Except unlike most other communicable diseases you could spend two weeks unknowingly infected and spread death to those close to you. So, there's that.

You neglect to say everyone should be practicing social distancIng when out in public, mask wearing indoors and in spaces where social distancing is not possible, and frequent hand washing. If you live with others close to you you should probably not be seeing someone outside that bubble. Also staying at home if you feel the least bit ill. Even if you choose to be intimate with someone on a one on one basis during this pandemic, there are ways to help prevent the spread of the disease. Cutting yourself off from all human intercourse is detrimental to your emotional health which will end up affecting your physical and mental health. The virus is going to be with us a long time and we better learn how to live with it and not be destroyed by it in ways we don’t anticipate.

[rustyrex]

I should've known better than to get on the floor face down on a futon, but I figured the guy really needed the business so I let it slide. As I got my face down to the floor, the dog hair was so much more noticeable, imagine it being stuck to you. It was everywhere.... He gave an okay massage, he had obviously been trained but his practice was unkempt. I flipped over and he offered a HE...I said sure and after about 30 seconds he tells me to get dressed and get out. I was surprised because I didn't do or say anything to be treated like that.

 

I paid him and left....apparently his reputation spread all over town and not one of my buddies like dealing with him. Plus I heard more than once that he acted very odd during the sessions. At least it wasn't just me.

[tj_forplay]

Except unlike most other communicable diseases you could spend two weeks unknowingly infected and spread death to those close to you. So, there's that.

Well I guess it's a good thing that I work from home & live alone. When out in public I wear a mask. So if I happen to get it, it's a very slim chance I'll spread it.

[+ poolboy48220]

About ¾ of the way into the massage, the house alarm goes off, it was loud and like an evacuation alarm in office building and there were small lights flashing. He sort of ran, I jumped the fuck up and run to the chair not sure if the house was on fire, being broken into, or if Russia had just bombed us. ... his response was “oh that was just the 45 minute alarm so we know how much time is left”

My father, in a retirement home, has one of those "I've fallen and I can't get up" alert systems; the system phones me when he sets it off, and I've set that phone number to ring with something like an air raid siren, so I'm sure to notice it. I can't imagine a massage where that goes off in the middle.

[MisterMike]

Interesting to see that even gays can be COVIDiots.

[big dale]

I had quite a few massages from Glen. I thought the massages were good and the endings very satisfying. But, you're right about the filthy hotel room, rotting food and stench. Shame, cause I had a thing for his body.

So you had that filthy rotten food experience and kept going back? Must have been some massage.

[m4same]

So you had that filthy rotten food experience and kept going back? Must have been some massage.

Well the food could have biodegraded between appointments?

[Guest NYCRich212]

This was my 3rd or 4th massage with this guy in Upper Manhattan. Buzzed him and the door opened. He opened the door and had clearly just woken up at 3 pm from a hard night out. I offer to leave, he says he just needs to jump in the shower. So I’m waiting for that, and in walks his.....mean as a snake girlfriend. They get in a heated argument over who’s turn to walk the 2 yapping dogs. Again, I offer to leave. He says go in the living room, which I did, followed by the yapping mutts. They settle the argument and she agrees to take the dogs outside and “wait for that to be over”. Nice.

I cut things off early because I didn’t want to risk seeing the not so lovely Eastern European woman again.

Same guy. Met at a hotel for a more “escort” experience. After a few drinks, I made the mistake of sort of rubbing his head playfully. Which he gets cranky about and says (kid you not). “Not the hair, I work hard on my hair”! A very real Saturday Night Fever moment with Tony Manero. He had no clue about the reference. I laughed at the guy and sent him on his way. I see his ads all the time. No dice.

[big dale]

This was my 3rd or 4th massage with this guy in Upper Manhattan. Buzzed him and the door opened. He opened the door and had clearly just woken up at 3 pm from a hard night out. I offer to leave, he says he just needs to jump in the shower. So I’m waiting for that, and in walks his.....mean as a snake girlfriend. They get in a heated argument over who’s turn to walk the 2 yapping dogs. Again, I offer to leave. He says go in the living room, which I did, followed by the yapping mutts. They settle the argument and she agrees to take the dogs outside and “wait for that to be over”. Nice.

I cut things off early because I didn’t want to risk seeing the not so lovely Eastern European woman again.

Same guy. Met at a hotel for a more “escort” experience. After a few drinks, I made the mistake of sort of rubbing his head playfully. Which he gets cranky about and says (kid you not). “Not the hair, I work hard on my hair”! A very real Saturday Night Fever moment with Tony Manero. He had no clue about the reference. I laughed at the guy and sent him on his way. I see his ads all the time. No dice.

Link to his ad please. =)

[+ Italiano]

My worst, was one of my first years ago.

 

https://rentmasseur.com/Glen

 

disheveled hotel room

 

Messy bathroom

 

He just finished eating Chinese food, so the room smelled like the shrimp fried rice and other food he left on the unmade bed and the half eaten food containers were in the bed.

oiled me up with dollar-store Brand baby oil and proceeded to give me repetitive massage strokes for about 40 minutes while he was watching an episode of Scandal and checking text messages with his other hand.

Oh my! Thank you @Monarchy79 for posting this. I was ALMOST booking with him!

[Cliff]

MikeMaverickxxx in Philadelphia. Nothing xxx about him unless that means extra extra extra horrible. Out of shape, surly attitude, shithole apartment. Nuff said.

[+ keroscenefire]

MikeMaverickxxx in Philadelphia. Nothing xxx about him unless that means extra extra extra horrible. Out of shape, surly attitude, shithole apartment. Nuff said.

 

Yeah I am very glad that I didn't meet with him when I saw him in NYC when I was there. I find him very attractive from his porn performances but everything I've read about him has been negative. Sorry for your experience.