Seeking arrangements success!

[MrMiniver]

I too have had great success on SA. Unfortunately, the arrangements rarely last that long. Guys start to flake or want more money or they don't live up to their end. And of course, I've grown bored once or twice. Still a great place to meet some guys for 1-3 month casual relationships. I consider it a portion of my escort stock portfolio. I still prefer to put 80-90% in hourly guys. Better paying dividends

 

I figure even if it was just a one time thing, it was a great one time thing, and I'm perfectly fine with that.

[MrMiniver]

How did you gents approach the "lifestyle expectation" level?

"Substantial" and "Negotiable" I suspect I understand but... Minimum? Practical?

 

What I noticed is that the vast majority of guys list "Negotiable." The ones who list HIGH or SUBSTANTIAL invariably were not as remotely hot as they thought they were. I also didn't put my accurate net worth or salary on there. They don't need to know that.

 

I was surprised by the number of uglees and fatties on that site. I still ask ... who is going to pay for that?

[MrMiniver]

This may be great at first, just don't be a sugar daddy statistic. Ive heard a lot of sugar babies coming back feeling like they were used and going to escorting because of how cheap the men on that site were.. Scoop this man up and treat him like gold.

 

Meh. Cheap, like expensive, is in the eye of the beholder. And these kinds of arrangments don't have to be just about money. Broaden your horizons.

[+ Keith30309]

I just checked this out and I'm a little surprised at how overt some of the profiles are .... "Always satisfies" and "Let me rock your world". Interesting.

[Honestlittlefucker]

Honey, If you think just bringing him to your house and paying expenses is going to work every time.. Your living in a dream world just like the other daddies on the website. He is an aspiring fitness model, meaning he probably wants to make a name for himself in the fitness world.. Meaning, his daily food intake a grocery list is a good 500$ a month or more in food.. thats not adding supplements.. He also, probably doesn't want to escort as it will taint his name. Down the road if you want to keep him your gonna have to give him something.

 

So if you really think that its just about love, your wrong. You play it like that sooner then later this guy will end up pissed off.. He seems like he also has done his homework.. Did you guys do the dirty deed the first night? or did it take awhile? did you sleep in the same bed in the first night? just curious. I just hope you don't fuck it up and become a statistic, trust me I've been doing this for 7+ years. I also have two exclusive men from that website... they told me horror stories.

[caliguy]

Meh. these kinds of arrangments don't have to be just about money. Broaden your horizons.

What kind of arrangements are these "sugar babies" looking for then? I kind of equate sugar as meaning ..$$.

[jawjateck]

Based on first-hand accounts from two former "babies" (they were naive), some SA "daddies" are savvy, manipulative *&!*#@s. They were frustrated while they were in it and lacked confidence to know what to do. Experience and hindsight allowed them to see it more accurately for what it was. Daddies wined 'em, dined 'em, and bought 'em nice clothes, but the kids were struggling to survive. I advised them to set a financial requirement. They did, and suddenly, both relationships ended. They were ok with it because they were not being helped in either situation.

[Honestlittlefucker]

You just hit that on the nail, I just hope our forum member doesn't become a statistic.

[+ WilliamM]

Meh. Cheap, like expensive, is in the eye of the beholder. And these kinds of arrangments don't have to be just about money. Broaden your horizons.

 

Aren't you involved in show business in some way? Just trying to broaden my horizons, as you so kindly suggested, MrMiniver.

[cany10011]

Being a SD requires deep pockets for wooing the sugar baby: clothes, exotic trips, restaurants. After doing it for 3 years and having successfully sent off the graduate to another state, i think i much prefer the hourly appointments where the only expectation is companionship/sex. I can't tell you how many fancy jockstraps, Hermes ties and Burberry sweaters i've bought over the years for the sugar baby (as gifts beyond his stipend). My current escort sees me twice a week. We never discusssed it, but he does expect me to see him regularly as we always book his time for the next appointment when leaving or he texts me at the beginning of each week to check my availability. It's a win win situation. I don't know if he sees others but his ad isn't up but he can have a few regulars maybe. He gets regular dependable work from me and i get the benefit of his generosity with his time (he doesn't watch clock) without the expected outlay of fancy dinners (although we go out, it's not always a 3 or 4 star restaurant) and expensive trips.

[MrMiniver]

Honey, If you think just bringing him to your house and paying expenses is going to work every time.. Your living in a dream world just like the other daddies on the website. He is an aspiring fitness model, meaning he probably wants to make a name for himself in the fitness world.. Meaning, his daily food intake a grocery list is a good 500$ a month or more in food.. thats not adding supplements.. He also, probably doesn't want to escort as it will taint his name. Down the road if you want to keep him your gonna have to give him something.

 

So if you really think that its just about love, your wrong. You play it like that sooner then later this guy will end up pissed off.. He seems like he also has done his homework.. Did you guys do the dirty deed the first night? or did it take awhile? did you sleep in the same bed in the first night? just curious. I just hope you don't fuck it up and become a statistic, trust me I've been doing this for 7+ years. I also have two exclusive men from that website... they told me horror stories.

 

I sometimes wonder if some people are able to read and comprehend. Where did I say any of the stuff above? Jeez. At least make sense when you are going to respond to a post.

[MrMiniver]

You just hit that on the nail, I just hope our forum member doesn't become a statistic.

 

Are you 12 years old or something? I just love comments like these when you don't know a damn fucking thing about me or anything else.

[MrMiniver]

seeking arrangement is pretty much exactly like rentmen except that the pay you receive at the end of the session on rentmen you make an "arrangement" to meet a couple of times a month on seeking arrangement and receive an allowance each month hence the expectation lifestyle levels.

 

sugar daddies use it to try to find love and its like finding a needle in a haystack same goes for sugar babies trying to find a secure arrangement. If a sugar baby is looking for financial help which most of them are then you have to speak or you won't get any help, you will just get a dinner here or there and fee for your travels.

 

However most sugardaddies want to talk financials in person not online which isn't good as 95 percent of the time the allowance you want isn't what the allowance the sugar daddy wants to give so in the end all you get is some akward conversation at dinner and someone getting mad and walking out lol. Ive heard stories from friends whom got a daddy and close to where the month they were supposed to be paid, the sugar daddy vanished lol.

 

Once again you're generalizing. Looking for love? Not in a million years. I think specific financials should be spoken of in person. I would never make an agreement online or on facetime or skype. Too many variables. But the expectation on both sides should be understood before meeting.

[jimboivyo]

I can't imagine many here being real sugar daddies. not with the regular commentary about high escort rates and penny pinching

[bigvalboy]

This may be great at first, just don't be a sugar daddy statistic. Ive heard a lot of sugar babies coming back feeling like they were used and going to escorting because of how cheap the men on that site were.. Scoop this man up and treat him like gold.

+2

[+ dutchmuch]

This article from NYTimes should make everyone here pause before falling 'in love' through dating services:

In Online Dating, ‘Sextortion’ and Scams

 

By KATE MURPHYJAN. 15, 2016

http://static01.nyt.com/images/2016/01/17/opinion/sunday/17murphy/17murphy-master675.jpg

• DATING websites and apps typically see a surge in activity this time of year as people who felt lonely over the holidays try to follow through on New Year’s resolutions to find someone special with whom to share their life, or maybe just someone agreeable to share their bed on a cold winter’s night.
   
  But whether they’re looking for sexcapades or long walks on the beach, the desire for companionship and connection makes people vulnerable to a most 21st-century crime: the online romance scam, which bilked victims of all ages and orientations out of more than $200 million last year, according to the F.B.I.
   
  “The drive to find a preferred mate is extremely powerful,” said Lucy Brown, a clinical professor of neurology at Albert Einstein College of Medicine, who studies the brain activity of people in love. “It’s a reflexive urge, like hunger and thirst,” which can cloud judgment and make people less likely to question the motives of an online match.
   
  Moreover, she said, romantic love can produce feelings of euphoria similar to the effects of cocaine or heroin, which explains why otherwise intelligent and accomplished people do irrational things to get a fix. Of course, people have always been fools for love — it’s just that the global reach and altered reality of the Internet increases the risk and can make the emotional and financial damage more severe.Have you been targeted on a dating site or app? If so, how did it unfold and how did you find out? Share your story in the comments with this article or on Facebook. Please avoid descriptions that could identify an individual or site. We may highlight your response in a follow-up article.
   
   
  “I don’t think there is a general understanding of how much of this romance scam stuff is out there, how it works and what the consequences are,” said Steven Baker, director of the Midwest region of the Federal Trade Commission. “It’s staggering how many people fall for it.”
   
  Scammers typically create fake profiles on dating sites and apps like Match.com, OkCupid, eHarmony, Grindr and Tinderusing pictures of attractive men and women — often real people whose identities they’ve filched off Facebook, Instagram or other social media sites. This lures victims who swipe or click to begin corresponding.
   
  The perpetrators may be working out of call centers in West Africa, wooing four or five people at a time. Or it could be some dude at a Starbucks texting victims on his cellphone, or a pajama-clad woman in her apartment sending bogus love bombs from her laptop. They may assume the identity of actual soldiers deployed overseas or pretend to be engineers working on projects in far-flung locales. Scammers have also been known to pose as university professors, clergy members, doctors, chefs, swimsuit models, waitresses, nurses and librarians.
   
  “They have a canny ability to mirror what the victim seems to need and to create a sense of intimacy very quickly,” said Debbie Deem, a victim specialist at the F.B.I.’s Los Angeles bureau. “They are able to manipulate the victim into believing they have found their one true soul mate.”
   
  Victims are as likely to be men as women, young, old or middle-aged, gay or straight, highly or poorly educated. After a few days, weeks or even months of romantic and sometimes hotly erotic back-and-forth via email, text or Skype, come the requests for money.
   
  Maybe the soldier needs a new cellphone so the lovers can better communicate or needs cash to get the necessary papers to go on leave so they can finally meet. The offshore engineer says his child is in the hospital and he’s having trouble wiring money to cover medical expenses. The model or nurse may need money to pay lawyers’ fees to get a restraining order against an abusive ex. Or maybe the scammer doesn’t ask for money at all but requests that the victim receive money and then transfer it to another account, giving marginally plausible reasons.
   
  “It’s common for victims to become money mules where they are unwittingly helping facilitate other crimes,” Mr. Baker said. “There have been prosecutions of victims who kept receiving and sending money even when they were firmly told they were working for crooks.” Yet prosecutionsof romance scammers have been rare, thanks to the anonymity of the Internet and the difficulty of tracing wired funds.
   
  In the latest twist, scammers coax victims into taking explicit photos and videos of themselves and then threaten to distribute them to their Facebook or Skype contacts if they don’t pay them money or help them launder money.
   
  “We’re seeing a lot of these sextortion cases lately,” said Wayne May, an administrator who gives advice to the lovelorn on the website ScamSurvivors. “We get about 30 requests for help a day,” usually from young men who sent a picture of their privates to a buxom Tinder match who turned out to be a blackmailer. AARP has been fielding similarly cringe-worthy distress calls from seniors who exposed themselves in front of a webcam.
   
  There are even reports of online recruiting of youths to join the Islamic State using romance and marriage as enticements. Young women, particularly in the West, are promised a so-called jihottie (jihadist hottie) of their choosing for a husband. Young men are offered an attractive and devoted wife, which they might not have the money or social standing to obtain otherwise, particularly if they live in the Middle East, where unemployment is forcing many to delay marriage (and sex if they are devout).
   
  “There is a lot of talk about developing love, falling in love and finding love on the battlefield,” said Katherine Brown, a lecturer of Islamic studies at the University of Birmingham in Britain who researches terrorist recruitment tactics. “They present quite a saccharine image of romance and marriage using the image of the lion and lioness together, supporting each other, being best friends and companions.”
   
  The F.T.C., F.B.I., Homeland Security, State Department and United States Army Criminal Investigation Command have reported an avalanche of complaints about scams in the past two years. Average financial losses are $5,000 to $10,000, but the F.B.I. says many victims have lost more than $400,000. And these are just losses reported by those who fessed up to being had.
   
  “I more often hear from people who call on behalf of a relative or friend who is getting scammed,” said Chris Grey, director of public affairs for the Army’s Criminal Investigation Command who learned quickly not to contact the victim in these cases. “I’ve been cussed out that I don’t know what I’m talking about because they are so infatuated with this person they’ve never even met.”
   
  Psychology experts liken this to the crushes or strong feelings of connection people develop for sports figures,
  , actors and other celebrities. It’s easy to project perfection on someone you’ve never met, particularly if, along with a pretty face, he or she is emailing, texting and calling every day or several times a day telling you how awesome you are.
   
  “For most of us, there are pockets and maybe whole sections of our minds and hearts that are not really reality-driven,” said Stephen Seligman, a psychoanalyst and clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco.
   
  That puts law enforcement officials in a bind when lovestruck victims so willingly and willfully participate in ruses. “People don’t want to know what’s behind the curtain,” said Mr. Grey. “They really don’t.”
  
  

[caliguy]

Oops I should have said most are not all daddy

anyhoo I'm happy you found someone at least for the moment.

So he hasn't asked for anything from you so far? No allowance, cars, home or even marriage?

I think it's fair to say he's going to want more then just a roof over his head.

[MrMiniver]

Oops I should have said most are not all daddy

anyhoo I'm happy you found someone at least for the moment.

So he hasn't asked for anything from you so far? No allowance, cars, home or even marriage?

 

Marriage? I'd run for the hills. Been there, done that a long time ago.

No he hasn't asked for anything big. Just advice, helped him with supplements, but hasn't asked for anything. He may, we'll see, not particularly worried about it.

[MrMiniver]

This article from NYTimes should make everyone here pause before falling 'in love' through dating services:

In Online Dating, ‘Sextortion’ and Scams

How does this have ANYTHING to do with what's being discussed here? An "arrangement" is NOT DATING.

[cany10011]

An arrangement of sorts can be considered "compensated" dating. I think it is fine if you've met someone you click with and don't mind helping out financially. It has worked for me and does not feel like I am paying someone on the clock, so to speak.

[+ Keith30309]

Perusing SA is an interesting exercise. I spent a little time scanning profiles and saw several people I knew/know including a companion I saw fairly consistently (I.e. 2-3 times/week for ~4 months) but disappeared. There's a number of guys who had been actively on RM and M4RN but fell off the radar, in some cases with completely different back stories (e.g., guy who was fairly well reviewed and I informally understand had several upscale clients but dropped his ad a few months ago; his SA profile says that he is homeless and living in an abandoned building.)

 

I was amazed at the number of people who seemed entitled ("impress me" & "in need of champagne and caviar")... One guy in search of an arrangement has a photo perched on the hood of a late model Mercedes and another pics from Paris and what looks like a Mediterranean coastal spot.

 

Some stories are sad - broken relationships and broken people - and others reflective of youthful wide-eyed excitement at the possibilities of life.

 

If you have time to kill it's an interesting anthropological exercise.

[Kenny]

“They have a canny ability to mirror what the victim seems to need and to create a sense of intimacy very quickly,” said Debbie Deem, a victim specialist at the F.B.I.’s Los Angeles bureau. “They are able to manipulate the victim into believing they have found their one true soul mate.”

 

That observation certainly seems to apply to the risks of "compensated dating." (Wasn't that a storyline in "How to Marry a Millionaire"?)

[+ goosh69]

I've met some guys as a Daddy... None who I liked. I guess I'm still young enough that they were mostly more into me than me into them, so nothing has ever come of it. The ones I met varied from guys who genuinely wanted older boyfriends to a guy who just wanted me to pay for him to go to Cochella.

[MrMiniver]

I've met some guys as a Daddy... None who I liked. I guess I'm still young enough that they were mostly more into me than me into them, so nothing has ever come of it. The ones I met varied from guys who genuinely wanted older boyfriends to a guy who just wanted me to pay for him to go to Cochella.

 

I think the very nature of a "daddy" relationship is that the daddy is going to be "more into you" than "you into him." If you're looking for someone you're "into" it sound like you need a boyfriend, not a daddy. To an extent, just like an escort, you're supposed to be playing a part and providing a service in exchange for "help" of some kind. If you're going to get hung up on whether you're "into" the guy or not, then it's clearly not for you.

[MrMiniver]

Perusing SA is an interesting exercise. I spent a little time scanning profiles and saw several people I knew/know including a companion I saw fairly consistently (I.e. 2-3 times/week for ~4 months) but disappeared. There's a number of guys who had been actively on RM and M4RN but fell off the radar, in some cases with completely different back stories (e.g., guy who was fairly well reviewed and I informally understand had several upscale clients but dropped his ad a few months ago; his SA profile says that he is homeless and living in an abandoned building.)

 

I was amazed at the number of people who seemed entitled ("impress me" & "in need of champagne and caviar")... One guy in search of an arrangement has a photo perched on the hood of a late model Mercedes and another pics from Paris and what looks like a Mediterranean coastal spot.

 

Some stories are sad - broken relationships and broken people - and others reflective of youthful wide-eyed excitement at the possibilities of life.

 

If you have time to kill it's an interesting anthropological exercise.

 

I agree completely with that. Currently, I am getting tons of messages by a personal trainer who is 6'4" (too tall for me) and who says he's straight. That's just not for me but he keeps sending pics and messages and sounds so desperate which when you look at his pics seems hard to fathom. But I guess he moved to a new state recently and the dream hasn't worked out yet. He said "I made out with a guy once playing truth or dare and it wasn't bad."

 

Yikes. It is an interesting place to peruse, as the poster said.