Casual Posted May 16 Share Posted May 16 I was checking the reviews of a therapist I visited a few months ago. I plan on seeing him again, and I just haven't made it happen. One of the reviews thanked him for an ego boost, and I had also had a pretty good ego boost from him. I realized I might be the equivalent of the guy at Hooters who believes the servers actually think he's funny, cute, etc. Ha ha. I'm sure he is 100% genuine in all of his compliments of his client The other one is a request for an opinion. There is a therapist who offers additional services. I don't request those. In fact, I proactively state I don't want those. I pay and tip in advance, so he knows exactly where I stand on that. But he has started to go there anyway. I stopped him, and he immediately stopped. This has happened twice. Do you think he's trying to increase his tip? Or is he just caught in the moment and HE WANTS to go there? If we weren't in a transactional situation, he'd be bounds out of my league. So I'm leaning to the idea that he wants additional tip. I also think I'm probably the only client who tells him I don't want that, and maybe he just does that out of habit. But I'm sure he has more presence of mind than that. What do you think? Lotus-eater 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RugbyBen Posted May 16 Share Posted May 16 I've sometimes been with masseurs well out of my league and it's still gone way further than what I expected or paid for. I started going to a guy recently where within 30 minutes of my first visit he was climbing on the table to fuck me. I didn't ask or pay for it and I'm not exactly irresistible so I assume he's just horny and likes to play. I've also been with regular masseurs where the sexual element fluctuates. One time it might be just a hand job at the end the next he's giving me an amazing rim job. I think there is an element of personal horniness with some masseurs so it's possible that's all it is. Monarchy79, Casual, + Just Sayin and 7 others 6 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted May 16 Share Posted May 16 6 minutes ago, RugbyBen said: I started going to a guy recently where within 30 minutes of my first visit he was climbing on the table to fuck me. I didn't ask or pay for it and I'm not exactly irresistible so I assume he's just horny and likes to play. So you're PAYING for a guy but assuming he's fucking you because he's horny ? 🤔 + nycman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johnrom Posted May 16 Share Posted May 16 Agreed. I really do not think it’s about getting a bigger tip. Maybe the guy is just aroused . Or yes maybe he is acting out of habit and it’s his usual process. If you like the guy and feel comfortable, then go with the flow. Don’t overthink it! If you truly have strong boundaries for some reason ( like loyalty to a partner) then yes just be clear up front as you have been and hope he respects that. He should! + Just Sayin, Tactile Daddy, + robear and 2 others 3 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starman05 Posted May 17 Share Posted May 17 I know there's always Venmo but if a guy starts adding services how does he know his client has the cash on him to add to his tip? Sometimes I've had massage therapists try to do more, thinking oh, they want more money. But maybe just maybe I'm not as undesirable as I think I am? (Nahhhh!) pubic_assistance and Casual 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ APPLE1 Posted May 17 Share Posted May 17 Often, MONEY speaks louder than anything else, and by the same token, so does lack of money. Stop paying, or at least tipping, in advance. My assumption is that if you fail to tip when he doesn't respect your boundaries, he will quickly commit your boundaries to memory. Wanderoz, + KensingtonHomo, Casual and 2 others 2 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ nycman Posted May 17 Share Posted May 17 + APPLE1 and Casual 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ robear Posted May 17 Share Posted May 17 I think paying *and tipping* in advance may be muddying the waters here. I always pay after, with the base rate already in an envelope. As appropriate, I then add twenties from my wallet before handing it over. It's then clear to the provider what's what. In your case, I would remind the provider about my boundaries before each session, but not pay him until after, making clear the tip is for a job well done as requested. Medin, Casual, pubic_assistance and 1 other 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RugbyBen Posted May 18 Share Posted May 18 On 5/16/2024 at 11:39 PM, pubic_assistance said: So you're PAYING for a guy but assuming he's fucking you because he's horny ? 🤔 He advertises purely as therapeutic massage and his price reflects that. thomas and Bluefin 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted May 18 Share Posted May 18 (edited) I tried a new provider yesterday for massage. He offers therapeutic, sensual and erotic. I asked for a blend of everything. Price was $160. Happy with the deep tissue work, happy with the relaxing sensual part and was pleasantly surprised with his instincts and efforts in the erotic finish. 🍆💦 So added $100 tip for giving-it-his-all on the erotic part. He messaged later to thank me for the generous tip and said he was looking forward to serving me again. This is how it should work. Edited May 18 by pubic_assistance spelling marylander1940, + robear, MikeBiDude and 15 others 4 1 7 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaronArtz Posted Monday at 11:08 AM Share Posted Monday at 11:08 AM On 5/18/2024 at 11:48 AM, pubic_assistance said: I tried a new provider yesterday for massage. He offers therapeutic, sensual and erotic. I asked for a blend of everything. Price was $160. Happy with the deep tissue work, happy with the relaxing sensual part and was pleasantly surprised with his instincts and efforts in the erotic finish. 🍆💦 So added $100 tip for giving-it-his-all on the erotic part. He messaged later to thank me for the generous tip and said he was looking forward to serving me again. This is how it should work. I like what you wrote here. It is very similar to how I like to operate. My question is - if you had asked for an erotic massage instead of the blended experience, would the ask price have been $160 as well, or would it have been higher? Spiritualadvisor 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted Monday at 02:44 PM Share Posted Monday at 02:44 PM 3 hours ago, BaronArtz said: My question is - if you had asked for an erotic massage instead of the blended experience, would the ask price have been $160 as well, or would it have been higher? A purely erotic session would have been more $$$ BUT ...I do genuinely enjoy a massage before I get-off. So rarely looking for a purely erotic session. Plus his space is a large studio in a professional building that isn't really conducive to a full-on sexual session. I'd want a more private/ cozy corner if I were really getting into an interactive moment. Spiritualadvisor and Redwine56 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali Gator Posted Monday at 04:41 PM Share Posted Monday at 04:41 PM On 5/16/2024 at 6:39 PM, pubic_assistance said: So you're PAYING for a guy but assuming he's fucking you because he's horny ? 🤔 Actually, he's not paying 'for a guy'. He's paying for a service - a massage. It's like saying 'you're paying for a guy' if you hire a chauffer. You're not paying for the guy - you're paying for the service (to be chauffeured). Tactile Daddy, pubic_assistance and Medin 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted Monday at 05:28 PM Share Posted Monday at 05:28 PM 46 minutes ago, Ali Gator said: Actually, he's not paying 'for a guy'. He's paying for a service OK Karen. thanks for stating the obvious Bluefin and Ali Gator 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marylander1940 Posted Monday at 05:36 PM Share Posted Monday at 05:36 PM On 5/16/2024 at 5:28 PM, Casual said: I was checking the reviews of a therapist I visited a few months ago. I plan on seeing him again, and I just haven't made it happen. One of the reviews thanked him for an ego boost, and I had also had a pretty good ego boost from him. I realized I might be the equivalent of the guy at Hooters who believes the servers actually think he's funny, cute, etc. Ha ha. I'm sure he is 100% genuine in all of his compliments of his client The other one is a request for an opinion. There is a therapist who offers additional services. I don't request those. In fact, I proactively state I don't want those. I pay and tip in advance, so he knows exactly where I stand on that. But he has started to go there anyway. I stopped him, and he immediately stopped. This has happened twice. Do you think he's trying to increase his tip? Or is he just caught in the moment and HE WANTS to go there? If we weren't in a transactional situation, he'd be bounds out of my league. So I'm leaning to the idea that he wants additional tip. I also think I'm probably the only client who tells him I don't want that, and maybe he just does that out of habit. But I'm sure he has more presence of mind than that. What do you think? I guess he's wired into giving a HE because that's what most clients want. Maybe he even assumed you wanted that and forgot you said you didn't. You already paid him and gave him a tip, I don't think he was thinking on the money, he was just simply doing what he usually does with other clients. Casual, pubic_assistance and Bluefin 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marylander1940 Posted Monday at 05:39 PM Share Posted Monday at 05:39 PM 55 minutes ago, Ali Gator said: Actually, he's not paying 'for a guy'. He's paying for a service - a massage. It's like saying 'you're paying for a guy' if you hire a chauffer. You're not paying for the guy - you're paying for the service (to be chauffeured). 8 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said: OK Karen. thanks for stating the obvious Agreed.... but most guys also hire based on how attractive the masseur is and some even expect an escort service at the end of the session. It's a fact! On 5/16/2024 at 6:39 PM, pubic_assistance said: So you're PAYING for a guy but assuming he's fucking you because he's horny ? 🤔 we can always dream, right? Some without that kind of fantasies wouldn't survive. pubic_assistance and Ali Gator 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali Gator Posted Monday at 09:49 PM Share Posted Monday at 09:49 PM 4 hours ago, pubic_assistance said: OK Karen. thanks for stating the obvious Wording is everything. Medin and marylander1940 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted Monday at 09:57 PM Share Posted Monday at 09:57 PM 6 minutes ago, Ali Gator said: Wording is everything. marylander1940 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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