Tipping?

[KeepItReal]

Oh, not this topic again. Pizza...pizza please! 

At least most people will be happy with pizza - this topic leaves everyone unhappy. 

[Capitano]

I think it's good to revisit this topic from time to time, nothing wrong with it. The world keeps changing, plus there are new folks who may be wondering whether $$$ numbers in older threads are still valid.

[pubic_assistance]

15 hours ago, Capitano said:

Typically, people don't make $200 an hour, and that is far above a working person's average wage. At just 20 hours a week, that's easily over $180k

Typically no. But you seem to be confusing people who work a full day with professions that may only see one or two clients a day...and days where there are NO clients.

You also have to consider the market. Even if someone DID make $180k annually ..in NYC that's a middle class lifestyle at best.

But again. Nobody is saying you must feel obligated to tip for regular service with a private provider, if you're that jealous of the fact that their hour is worth more than your hour.

[BaronArtz]

I  am in NYC,  Here is how I compensate my regulars:

Masseur 1 -  charges 180 for an incall massage,  Athletic, mediterranean look,  Hands down the best massages I have gotten so far.  The guy has superior technique.  He loves eating my ass which he excels at,  He either fucks me or fingers my hole.  I would see him more often than I do but he has a 9-5 job and travels a lot.  I give him 300 f for the hour and sometimes a small gift, like a bottle of scotch.

Masseur 2 - charges 180 for an incall massage.  He does have an ad on rentmen as well,  Muscular boy next door type,  I book him for 45 minutes massage and 45 minutes playtime.  His massage is very good and he lets me do whatever I want in bed.  He is not a clock watcher and never says time is up.  I usually  end up spending 2 hours with him, ending our fuck session naked in bed or on his couch with a drink.  He is a sweetheart kind of guy who likes keeping in touch via text to talk about work and life in general in between our sessions. I give him 400 which he seems very happy with,

Masseur 3 - charges 180 for incall massage.  He is not really my type but I find him cute  - sorta..  He spends 15 minutes grooming my pubic area, followed by 45 minutes therapeutic massage which is very thorough.  Although therapeutic, he is naked during the session and says often that 'more' is available.  I give him 240.

Masseur 4 - charges 160 for incall massage.  Cute white guy who conveniently lives in my area.  I have been seeing him for a very long time.  His massage skills are not the greatest, but he is sensual and has a great attitude.  He is always available to me and his just my convenient option  when I need a quickie,  We have never fucked, but he is good at hand jobs.  I give him 200-220.

There are others, but those are my main providers at the moment.  I feel fortunate working with these guys, all depending on my mood and time availability.  They seem happy with the compensation  and I have no problem scheduling repeat appointments.

[Dr.KNYC]

I tend to think of myself as a generous tipper, and I often get a message afterwards from providers thanking me for my generosity.  But I feel absolutely shamed finding out how much some of you tip!  My goodness, I should rethink my economy on these matters.

[Bluefin]

Providers charge what the market in their area will bear. A terrible:mediocre therapist is going to charge the same as the guy giving an amazing experience. I tip the amazing experience bc I want to reward that person for the extra effort and I want him to be able to make a living and keep providing me great service. It’s that simple. 

[Capitano]

49 minutes ago, Bluefin said:

Providers charge what the market in their area will bear. A terrible:mediocre therapist is going to charge the same as the guy giving an amazing experience. I tip the amazing experience bc I want to reward that person for the extra effort and I want him to be able to make a living and keep providing me great service. It’s that simple. 

Another way to reward him is to schedule many new appointments, whereas those that suck you don't go back to and write a warning here. Informed markets are good markets.

[Capitano]

5 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Typically no. But you seem to be confusing people who work a full day with professions that may only see one or two clients a day...and days where there are NO clients.

You also have to consider the market. Even if someone DID make $180k annually ..in NYC that's a middle class lifestyle at best.

But again. Nobody is saying you must feel obligated to tip for regular service with a private provider, if you're that jealous of the fact that their hour is worth more than your hour.

You seem to not understand the value of time and how markets work. If they choose to charge a lot and have few clients and that works for them, power to them! And even more so if they find clients willing to tip them beyond the already high rate. All I am saying is that tipping makes no sense to me at those levels, and that they become more like lawyers and other professionals than wage workers who work way more for way less.

PS What percentage of workers in NYC earn over $180k? Yeah, life is expensive, but "we all  make our own personal choices, and we all pay our personal prices."

 

Edited May 26, 2024 by Capitano

[Capitano]

Earning over $180k while working 20 hours a week is not too shabby, numbers don't lie, and let's not even get into how much in taxes masseurs actually pay. But needless to say, nobody is forcing anyone not to tip.

https://outpost-club.com/blog/how-much-do-you-need-to-make-to-live-in-nyc#:~:text=However%2C for a more comfortable,%245%2C966 and %248%2C286 per month.

[+ Jamie21]

Oh no! This topic again…pick a side 🙂.

All I will say is that some of my clients tip generously, most don’t. I have no expectations of being tipped but it’s nice when it happens. For those clients who I know tip generously I’m more inclined to say yes to their requested day / time even if it’s not convenient for me. If he’s a generous tipper I’m much more inclined to put myself out to meet him. 

[Client1985]

I tip generously at a studio where the masseur is not the owner. 

I've made a great connection with a masseur from a studio and we meet outside his work. We agreed to a standard fee. I don't tip but I often buy a gift card for coffee or other items. I'd give these gifts randomly and never after a massage. 

 

[BJNYC]

What does everyone suggest tip-wise for 
sensual only vs. HE included vs. additional extras vs. full service.  
 

 

[+ FrankR]

3 hours ago, BJNYC said:

What does everyone suggest tip-wise for 
sensual only vs. HE included vs. additional extras vs. full service.  
 

 

Yes I suggest: https://www.peteranswers.com/

 

[Peter Eater]

On 3/30/2023 at 4:42 AM, pubic_assistance said:

American culture was based on the idea that people are not slaves.

This will be news to Americans.

Also, tipping should be banned (easier in public accommodations than private ones, like sex work). Tipping promotes income inequality, wage theft, discrimination, etc., etc.

[ArchwayAlex]

20-30% in the US only where a HE was provided, less outside the US.

Assuming the HE was any good. 

Am I doing something wrong? 

[Hyattsville]

OK, remember that self employed masseurs are just that, self employed. No sick pay, no vacation pay, no retirement contributions, no free health insurance, don't get paid when the weather is bad or the economy tanks or the pandemic hits... they pay for their own advertising, do their own taxes, keep their own books, buy their own materials, do tons of laundry, pay for their spaces, computers, cell phones... the lists goes on. Do you need to tip? No. Do you really think they make $500 a day every day? No, they don't. I tip at least 20% for real therapeutic massage or and really good erotic massage. If I get both I tip 40%. 

Edited February 18 by Hyattsville

[Capitano]

9 hours ago, Hyattsville said:

OK, remember that self employed masseurs are just that, self employed. No sick pay, no vacation pay, no retirement contributions, no free health insurance, don't get paid when the weather is bad or the economy tanks or the pandemic hits... they pay for their own advertising, do their own taxes, keep their own books, buy their own materials, do tons of laundry, pay for their spaces, computers, cell phones... the lists goes on. Do you need to tip? No. Do you really think they make $500 a day every day? No, they don't. I tip at least 20% for real therapeutic massage or and really good erotic massage. If I get both I tip 40%. 

Doesn't a plumber, landscaper, lawyer, or dentist do these same things and have these same issues?

[Typical]

44 minutes ago, Capitano said:

Doesn't a plumber, landscaper, lawyer, or dentist do these same things and have these same issues?

Yes. And your private practice doctor, too. 

People can do whatever they want with their money. They can set it on fire in the street for all I care, so long as they don’t come looking for a public bailout later in life when the accounts are drained.  But there can be a fine line between generosity and foolishness in these matters.

I never pay a total of more than $200. Never. Ever. Period. But I don’t expect or generally want to have full sex with a massage therapist either. So if a therapist ask $200 and I agree to see them, they get $200. I do see a couple of guys that still ask $160, and they are good, so I pay $180- $200. These are personal choices and I have never gotten the slightest hint that anyone is dissatisfied in any way and the service provided is at least what I expect and often more. 

It helps that I see regulars and we get along. I’m not weird to them. I don’t flake on appointments.  I am always clean. I don’t say or do strange things. I smile. I say thank you. I’m not late for appointments. I’m….easy. That all is valuable to them and makes a difference to people on a schedule who too often deal with problem clients. 

If I see someone 2-3 times a month, and they know nothing odd is going to happen while I’m there and that I will be on time and nice and clean, they seem very pleased to see me as much as possible, tip or no tip. Consistency, conviviality and regularity make valuable clients. Win/win. 

[allyouknow]

47 minutes ago, Typical said:

Yes. And your private practice doctor, too. 

People can do whatever they want with their money. They can set it on fire in the street for all I care, so long as they don’t come looking for a public bailout later in life when the accounts are drained.  But there can be a fine line between generosity and foolishness in these matters.

I never pay a total of more than $200. Never. Ever. Period. But I don’t expect or generally want to have full sex with a massage therapist either. So if a therapist ask $200 and I agree to see them, they get $200. I do see a couple of guys that still ask $160, and they are good, so I pay $180- $200. These are personal choices and I have never gotten the slightest hint that anyone is dissatisfied in any way and the service provided is at least what I expect and often more. 

It helps that I see regulars and we get along. I’m not weird to them. I don’t flake on appointments.  I am always clean. I don’t say or do strange things. I smile. I say thank you. I’m not late for appointments. I’m….easy. That all is valuable to them and makes a difference to people on a schedule who too often deal with problem clients. 

If I see someone 2-3 times a month, and they know nothing odd is going to happen while I’m there and that I will be on time and nice and clean, they seem very pleased to see me as much as possible, tip or no tip. Consistency, conviviality and regularity make valuable clients. Win/win. 

exactly - I am not playing a guessing game when it comes to service. And if I wanted a more playful experience I would hire an escort and ask for what I want and get charged accordingly.  

[Peter Eater]

I like to stick a Ben Franklin up my ass, and if the masseur finds it, he can keep it. Easy-peasy.

[56harrisond]

19 minutes ago, Peter Eater said:

I like to stick a Ben Franklin up my ass, and if the masseur finds it, he can keep it. Easy-peasy.

[Hyattsville]

10 hours ago, Capitano said:

Doesn't a plumber, landscaper, lawyer, or dentist do these same things and have these same issues?

Yes, but do they offer happy endings? I do tip my landscaper. Plumbers, lawyers and Dentists all charge more than my massage therapist, a lot more.
I'm a little sad that so many guys on here want to pay no more than the going rate for standard therapeutic massage but expect the masseur to be incredibly hot, naked and to have sex with them all the while stroking their fragile egos. You want more than a "standard legit" massage? You should be willing to say thank you appropriately. If you can't afford the sexiest best masseurs who put out every time? Get a better job or make do with what you can afford. Do you need to tip? No, but don't expect the same level of service as the guys who do will get either. 

Edited February 19 by Hyattsville

[Typical]

1 hour ago, Hyattsville said:

Yes, but do they offer happy endings? I do tip my landscaper. Plumbers, lawyers and Dentists all charge more than my massage therapist, a lot more.
I'm a little sad that so many guys on here want to pay no more than the going rate for standard therapeutic massage but expect the masseur to be incredibly hot, naked and to have sex with them all the while stroking their fragile egos. You want more than a "standard legit" massage? You should be willing to say thank you appropriately. If you can't afford the sexiest best masseurs who put out every time? Get a better job or make do with what you can afford. Do you need to tip? No, but don't expect the same level of service as the guys who do will get either. 

You are reading a lot into what you think other people “expect” from a massage therapist. A lot. If a therapist wants more than the standard rate (whatever that is: is it the $300 at the Four Seasons spa with a day pass to the facility and high end products and millions of dollars in spa decor, or is it the $40 in the hole on the wall on 10th Avenue?) he should ask for it. If he’s worth it he will have clients, if not he will need to lower his rate or “get a better job”.

At the Four Seasons example the therapist is going to get a fraction of that fee and a tip is expected. But that is not the situation we are discussing here.  Some dude’s apartment in Hells Kitchen is not the Four Seasons Spa and the dude sets his price and keeps 100%. He should set the price he thinks his service is worth. And if he sets the price too high, he can sit in his non Four Seasons spa apartment without clients all day. 

[AtticusBK]

I went to see a guy who I personally think is 🔥🔥🔥 for the first time about a month ago on the West side of manhattan for a therapeutic/erotic combo massage. His rate is $250. Had the massage been solid w basic extras, I would have probably tipped 10-20%. But we ended up having sex that I thoroughly enjoyed, so I tipped him 40% (bc he went well above & beyond the expected). I would have been embarrassed / felt guilty had I not, and wanted to see him again…soon. After I saw him the 2nd time, he sent me a price promotion for our 3rd mtg. 
I say tip all of your providers guys — and tip the ones at the spas even more — esp if they’re making you happy. If not - well that’s a different story.

PS I do not get these comparisons to other professions. Doesn’t equate for me.

[Typical]

1 hour ago, AtticusBK said:

I went to see a guy who I personally think is 🔥🔥🔥 for the first time about a month ago on the West side of manhattan for a therapeutic/erotic combo massage. His rate is $250. Had the massage been solid w basic extras, I would have probably tipped 10-20%. But we ended up having sex that I thoroughly enjoyed, so I tipped him 40% (bc he went well above & beyond the expected). I would have been embarrassed / felt guilty had I not, and wanted to see him again…soon. After I saw him the 2nd time, he sent me a price promotion for our 3rd mtg. 
I say tip all of your providers guys — and tip the ones at the spas even more — esp if they’re making you happy. If not - well that’s a different story.

PS I do not get these comparisons to other professions. Doesn’t equate for me.

This is less of a “tip” and more of an additional payment for enhanced services. This is a different topic. When I go to the dentist for a cleaning and end up getting a tooth pulled as well, the extra fee paid for the pulling isn’t a tip, it’s a fee for additional service.