Deceased Escorts

[wayout]

I do wonder about some of the past escorts I've hired and if they were still alive or not.  They weren't big name escorts and I don't know their real names so there is no real way for me to know for sure.  Most, I am sure, just retired and didn't want contact any longer (which in itself can be a disappointment), but there are a few who I wonder if they passed away.  I think back at some of our encounters and I can see that perhaps there were some signs of a sad life, depression or chemical dependency.  The signs were quite subtle and I may be reading too much into them but it does give me pause to think about whatever happened to them.  Perhaps not knowing is better than the alternative (if it turned out in a bad way for them).

[excelntsvc]

17 hours ago, sutherland said:

When Arpad Miklos took his life I thought about the clients who had seen him during the previous week.  Did they see the writing on the wall?  If I had detected a sign of serious depression what would I be, morally, expected to do?    I have always viewed encounters with escorts to be business transactions; not a friendship. It's a tough spot to be in.

i knew Arpad/Peter from his time in south Florida and made a point of seeing him when I'd go to NYC ... trained as an engineer, he fled repression only to find his degrees useless here ... he loved classical music and I took him to several concerts over the years ... his depression was cyclical but he said a few times that he was getting help ... a sad loss of a lovely and sexy man

[BeamerBikes]

While this topic can trend depressing, I do think it's a nice idea to have an in- memoriam thread.  Some folks do leave an positive impact on others, and sharing the good memories can't hurt.

[robberbaron4u]

22 minutes ago, BeamerBikes said:

While this topic can trend depressing, I do think it's a nice idea to have an in- memoriam thread.  Some folks do leave an positive impact on others, and sharing the good memories can't hurt.

I had the acquaintance of Gary Ware who was the model for the character "Sonny" in the film by that name. Sadly, he  contracted aids and died some thirty years ago at the age of 27. In his day, he was the proverbial "walkin' streak of sex", a celebrity of sorts in that regard; in his physical appearance, he was the perfection of the form of a young Paul Newman. At our last meeting, shortly before his death, he remarked to me that he had "his day in the sun" and his only regret in dying was that "people forget you". 

[+ tassojunior]

The amazing thing to me is that European guys don't go this way but actually seem to do better than most in life. I'm sure there's the obligatory coke involved with filming and other bad habits but they end up better off not worse. I keep up with a number of them and they're teachers, coaches, media workers, athletes, etc when they age-out of porn and escorting around 30. And they usually start earlier on their 18th birthday. 

Really like night and day difference. 

[BeamerBikes]

You only live twice from the Bond series...  Came from the saying...  You only die twice, once in real life, and once when your name/memory leaves the earth.  

It can be sad if you focus on the negative aspects.  Nonetheless, escorts/body workers/strippers still are people, and equally deserving of rememberance. 

[Guest MikeThomas]

50 minutes ago, BeamerBikes said:

While this topic can trend depressing, I do think it's a nice idea to have an in- memoriam thread.  Some folks do leave an positive impact on others, and sharing the good memories can't hurt.

We'll... it seems to me these in memoriam threads (there have been others) end up speculating about peoples' personal lives, assuming they were unhappy, etc.

[BeamerBikes]

8 minutes ago, MikeThomas said:

We'll... it seems to me these in memoriam threads (there have been others) end up speculating about peoples' personal lives, assuming they were unhappy, etc.

Yeah, that's the depressing point.  Folks going morbid and forgetting somethings are better left unsaid. Same for folks that want to gawk at car accidents. 

[dutchal]

 

[+ JEC]

I met with Jay Dymel about 3 months before he sadly died in 2019

 

[pubic_assistance]

5 hours ago, tassojunior said:

The amazing thing to me is that European guys don't go this way

Nothing remarkable about it to me. American culture is riddled with guilt over sexuality. Obviously "Europe" is a very general term for many different cultures...but in many places, especially the larger cities in the more progressive countries in Europe, they are indeed more accepting of people's sexual life and don't necessarily push the guilt button on one's choices when you don't go down the "get married and have kids" avenue.

[+ DrownedBoy]

2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Nothing remarkable about it to me. American culture is riddled with guilt over sexuality. Obviously "Europe" is a very general term for many different cultures...but in many places, especially the larger cities in the more progressive countries in Europe, they are indeed more accepting of people's sexual life and don't necessarily push the guilt button on one's choices when you don't go down the "get married and have kids" avenue.

Don't forget the social safety net, and universal healthcare that includes therapy. In the U.S., if you need help but don't have money or the right insurance, you're SOL.

[+ tassojunior]

2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Nothing remarkable about it to me. American culture is riddled with guilt over sexuality. Obviously "Europe" is a very general term for many different cultures...but in many places, especially the larger cities in the more progressive countries in Europe, they are indeed more accepting of people's sexual life and don't necessarily push the guilt button on one's choices when you don't go down the "get married and have kids" avenue.

 

24 minutes ago, DrownedBoy said:

Don't forget the social safety net, and universal healthcare that includes therapy. In the U.S., if you need help but don't have money or the right insurance, you're SOL.

I think it's both and extended family. I know in Prague sex work is covered in some high schools as just another occupation. The insistence is that they pay their owed tax from wherever and that supports a social program that provides everyone with an apartment, food, complete healthcare etc and at the first sign of a drug problem there's intervention and social support from counselors and family. Since there's little difference seen between a "good" job and a "bad" one, people randomly take ones which would not be "good" ones here while others become teachers or athletes without real status or bigger income. 

[Enronnja]

I think this is a beautiful thread. These beautiful souls made an impact during their short time. There are guys I’ve met in my short time even though its once, the connection we had made it feel like a part of them is with me. Thats why I’m so picky with who I choose to meet.

[+ carlos45]

I hired both Andy Dill and Haus Weston, each once.  I was shocked to hear of their deaths, as I remember both to be kind and personable people.

[+ Tygerscent]

On 2/2/2022 at 8:30 AM, caliguy said:

Makes sense. Escorting has a way higher rate of drug addiction and mental illness then society in general. Just like porn. 

I don't think it causes it but that's just where they seem to end up. 

Besides doctors, politicians, lawyers, teachers, low income individuals, teenagers etc~ Porn stars, escorts and courtesans might have a corner but, it’s not a corner on  Drugs, suicide and mental illness… that’s society wide~ 

[+ Tygerscent]

On 2/3/2022 at 9:20 AM, BeamerBikes said:

You only live twice from the Bond series...  Came from the saying...  You only die twice, once in real life, and once when your name/memory leaves the earth.  

It can be sad if you focus on the negative aspects.  Nonetheless, escorts/body workers/strippers still are people, and equally deserving of rememberance. 

The concept of dying twice was an obsession with king tut~ That was a theory he both lived and died with… 

[+ Tygerscent]

On 2/2/2022 at 8:51 AM, Looking4MuscleInSD said:

That seems to be true from my experience. The majority of guys I’ve hired had one or more of the following issues:

• Addiction issues
• Psychological issues (bi-polar, depression, pedophilia)
• Financial problems
• Criminal backgrounds (including prison time)

These can be the traits of Clients as well… people in general~ None if the “issues” you mentioned here are exclusive to “hires”~ These are human being issues~ 

[sjmuktop]

The first escort I ever hired (back in 2006) died from a drug overdose in 2008:

 

Edited February 5, 2022 by sjmuktop

[LaffingBear]

I've heard of two or three guys, without renown, who were gone a few years after hiring. From long ago... the type of arrangement made through ads in the back of local gay newspapers.   B.A.R.  

Jon Vincent, also a porn actor, was one of my earliest.  And so nice.  I wasn't very experienced... he actually slowed down the session, was giving lessons in technique, etc.  Hired him again 2-3 years later, he looked like hell, had lost a ton of weight.  Was gone not long after that.

Edited February 5, 2022 by LaffingBear

[Antoinetteferson]

On 2/2/2022 at 6:07 PM, sutherland said:

When Arpad Miklos took his life I thought about the clients who had seen him during the previous week.  Did they see the writing on the wall?  If I had detected a sign of serious depression what would I be, morally, expected to do?    I have always viewed encounters with escorts to be business transactions; not a friendship. It's a tough spot to be in.

I was shocked about his passed too. Thank you for writing this. 

[Epigonos]

I got together with Josh Weston, in San Francisco, a couple of years before he passed away.  He was an absolute sweetheart and actually quite shy.

[jeezifonly]

The tragic part is that some of the nicest memories of these individuals are not the ones on the list to be shared in general company. She why not remember them here? Among a group of people who acknowledge the type of gifts they shared. People in their real lives had other, broader memories, and here, the more specific memories of their masculine beauty and openness to sharing themselves with a stranger should be honored if you like to remember them for it.

[+ Italiano]

On 2/2/2022 at 6:07 PM, sutherland said:

When Arpad Miklos took his life I thought about the clients who had seen him during the previous week.  Did they see the writing on the wall?  If I had detected a sign of serious depression what would I be, morally, expected to do?    I have always viewed encounters with escorts to be business transactions; not a friendship. It's a tough spot to be in.

I hired Arpad a few months prior to his death. I had an AMAZING time with him, even if I found him slightly introvert. I had a feeling he also somehow enjoyed his time with me, or perhaps he was a fabulous actor, I don't know! From time to time we exchanged texts to say hallo and for some small talk, I was definitely thinking to see him again. His passing was a shock for me, as for everybody else who knew him personally or through his movies. It's incredible to think that 9 years have passed by already...

I also hired a beautiful Mexican/Russian guy twice when I was in working for a month in Mexico City 20 years ago. We had a fabulous time, and he came to my hotel a third time for free. A couple of years later I saw he was starting to make a splash in Porn movies with a Russian name, I think it was Igor or Vladimir...but not 100% sure. He definitely had nothing of stereotypical Mexican, he looked totally Eastern European.

Another couple of years later I found out he had died.

Edited February 16, 2022 by Italiano

[Leyte2019]

On 2/3/2022 at 12:14 PM, tassojunior said:

The amazing thing to me is that European guys don't go this way but actually seem to do better than most in life. I'm sure there's the obligatory coke involved with filming and other bad habits but they end up better off not worse. I keep up with a number of them and they're teachers, coaches, media workers, athletes, etc when they age-out of porn and escorting around 30. And they usually start earlier on their 18th birthday. 

Really like night and day difference. 

Why amazing? Far less cultural hangups on nudity and sex than in Puritanical North America.