using a restaurant coupon with a masseur

[Smurof]

I'm sure there are wildly different takes on this, but after my most recent experience, the anti-couponers may have a new convert.

 

I had a pleasant time with a hire enough so that I offered to take him out to dinner, my treat (actually the coupon's treat). The restaurant I took us to was about a 3 star plus out of five, as far as ambiance and cost. We had not eaten here before. The waiter had not seen the coupon I was trying to discreetly use, so he took it to the manager, and that's when dinner took a turn for the disaster.

 

The manager told me he had never seen the coupon I was trying to use before, and would not honor it. That was not o.k. with me. I excused myself and being in a casino found a manager higher than the restaurant manager who quickly went into the back to set that manager straight and tell me it was fine to use, and he's sorry about the misunderstanding. Now I'm in a completely fucked situation all the way around. My dinner companion A. now is aware how cheap I am B. is now uncomfortable to eat his food because who knows what spit or worse will be imbedded in his entrée and C. after all of this will never go anywhere with me ever again. I will point out the coupon was brand new and had restrictions, but I was not attempting to use it during an invalid time frame.

 

In a perfect world, the coupon would have been taken, I would have saved nearly 50% of the bill cost, my companion would never have known, and the food would be fine and I'd take him back to his home and thank him for an enjoyable evening. Instead, he wouldn't touch his pasta, and stuck to the buffet style salad bar, and spent dinner with a flurry of texts presumably to his friends, letting them know of the worst dinner experience of his life!

[HotWhiteThirties]

Sometimes our cheapskate ways catch up with us, I guess. Did he wind up eating? If so, I think all is probably fine. Chalk it up to an experience. I wouldn’t be too offended if I was the provider (which I’m not). I’d just assume you’re frugal. I find frugality attractive so long as it doesn’t get in the way of having a good time or being a human being.

[+ oldNbusted]

I wonder what his texts looked like...

 

[jjkrkwood]

@Smurof , don't think of yourself as CHEAP.... Think of it as being thrifty.... no shame in that. and your companion shouldn't JUDGE you, as long as you were able to afford and pay for his services, and offer him a free meal as well....

 

Groupon is your friend !

[IndyGuy]

Bad manners to attempt to use a coupon while offering to treat someone to dinner! Save it to use another time!

[+ poolboy48220]

Bad manners to attempt to use a coupon while offering to treat someone to dinner! Save it to use another time!

Miss Manners disagrees. Bad manners is paying attention to how your host pays. This would've been fine except for the inept restaurant staff.

[cany10011]

I try not to be frugal with my hires esp after they’ve shown me such a nice time.

[+ nycman]

What did we learn?.....

[+ sniper]

I think in the interest of minimizing the "scene," if possible I would have paid the bill, taken it and the coupon to the casino manager later and secured an equivalent value comp. Restaurants inside casinos are a weird situation as some are owned separately, some aren't and it's not at all apparent to the customer and they don't necessarily even update the staff on promotions.

Without actually being there and hearing what was said/how it was said it's hard to tell how your guest would be expected to react. (for example, I have a friend who immediately jumps to 11 and starts dropping f-bombs and beyond in any customer service dispute and regardless of whether he is initially right, the way he acts is a problem for me. )

[+ E.T.Bass]

Sounds like the sort of hijinks George Costanza would experience if there was an episode with an escort.

 

Later Jerry, Elaine and Kramer would argue about George's drama.

Edited January 11, 2020 by E.T.Bass

[jjkrkwood]

What did we learn?.....

 

That people should really just mind their OWN business and just "DO themselves" ?

[MikeBiDude]

B. is now uncomfortable to eat his food because who knows what spit or worse will be imbedded in his entrée and

Silly paranoia in a “3 star” casino restaurant. So many urban myths about this happening...in fact the liability and public relations concerns in a restaurant like this - would never happen.

 

C. after all of this will never go anywhere with me ever again

Why? Your paranoia ?

 

I probably wouldn’t use a coupon in a situation like this.

[spider]

I’m so confused. I’d never show a coupon to a server before ordering as that seems extraordinarily cheap, especially when entertaining someone.

 

I’d wait until the bill comes and put it in the bill holder with my credit card and just ask “is this good?”

 

That makes it clear that you’re good paying the bill regardless but hoping the coupon will be OK, no prob either way.

 

even better, just say “excuse me” and walk up front with the bill and pay it. That way your guest is completely out of the transaction. Especially good if you go up before the bill even comes.

Edited January 11, 2020 by spider

[LookingAround]

If you can afford to hire an escort you can afford to pay a dinner bill.

[+ g56whiz]

Surely you jest. A successful hiring experience involves a fair degree of fantasy. Why would you consider doing anything that would diminish that spell?

[jjkrkwood]

WHY does one person need to behave like another, or else be judged ? I know judging is human nature, but whose business is it really ? In this case, its purely economics. A penny saved is a penny earned. And while the client already forked over his $300 ?companion fee, if he chooses to use a dinner coupon, what harm is being done other than to THOSE that are choosing to shame him ? I really dont get why anyone should care ? Especially the escort, who enjoyed some good ass AND a meal !

[Deadlift1]

OP. Why in God's name would u have to worry about someone spitting in the food or imbedding something worse in the entrees? Do you think u r a mob boss and someone might take u out. If anyone would do that it would be the kitchen staff if you kept sending back the meal to be made differently.

[instudiocity]

OP. Why in God's name would u have to worry about someone spitting in the food or imbedding something worse in the entrees? Do you think u r a mob boss and someone might take u out. If anyone would do that it would be the kitchen staff if you kept sending back the meal to be made differently.

I’m wondering why an escort would object to a little bit of spit... doesn’t he suck face (swallow spit)with multiple guys as part of his work?

[+ FreshFluff]

[QUOTE="sniper, post: 1844066, member: 5637"]I think in the interest of minimizing the "scene," if possible I would have paid the bill, taken it and the coupon to the casino manager later and secured an equivalent value comp.

 

I agree that it was ok to use the coupon but better to avoid an in-person complaint. Hindsight is 20/20, but posting an anonymous complaint on social media afterwards could be effective. “I came in because of your coupon and was so embarrassed when it was rejected.”

Edited January 12, 2020 by FreshFluff

[rvwnsd]

OP. Why in God's name would u have to worry about someone spitting in the food or imbedding something worse in the entrees? Do you think u r a mob boss and someone might take u out. If anyone would do that it would be the kitchen staff if you kept sending back the meal to be made differently.

Unless I am reading incorrectly, it was the companion, not @Smurof, who was concerned with someone spitting in his food.

 

I don't see anything wrong with using a coupon when entertaining a masseur. This isn't a first date - it is treating someone to a meal. It isn't as if he handed a piece of broken glass to the masseur and said "bite on this and say it was in the food so your meal is free" for God's sake.

[LaffingBear]

Agree with many.... why is it bad form or cheap to use a coupon when hosting a rentguy?

 

Especially in a casino.... its an industry that runs on comps

[IndyGuy]

It is bad manners for many reasons, not the least of which is eventually what ultimately happened - your invited guest is uncomfortable! There is a time and place for coupons...but trying to sneak in a coupon to avoid paying a full bill for an invited guest in this situation is not okay.

[jjkrkwood]

It is bad manners for many reasons, not the least of which is eventually what ultimately happened - your invited guest is uncomfortable! There is a time and place for coupons...but trying to sneak in a coupon to avoid paying a full bill for an invited guest in this situation is not okay.

 

If the guest was uncomfortable, then the next time he is "invited" to partake in a FREE meal he should just turn it down. Solves the problem, doesn't it ? Unless you are a food critic, when you are invited to a meal, the focus should be more about the "company" than the food... and how its paid for should be no concern of the guest.

[MscleLovr]

Fascinating exchange of views. I know that US culture is very different from European culture, but I thought that here the OP was the host and his companion was the guest. The emphasis should have been on looking after the guest.

 

I feel that displaying and insisting on using the coupon was simply tacky.

 

In a perfect world, the coupon would have been taken, I would have saved nearly 50% of the bill cost, my companion would never have known

 

Alas the real world is messy. And in my opinion @Smurof, you did not handle this well. You did not say that you first asked your companion if you might sort this out before the meal.

 

I probably wouldn’t use a coupon in a situation like this.

I’d never show a coupon to a server before ordering

 

I agree with both @MikeBiDude and @spider If you must use a coupon, do so discreetly when paying.

 

It is bad manners for many reasons.....your invited guest is uncomfortable!

 

Exactly @IndyGuy ! I entertain friends to dinner in restaurants often. Towards the end of the meal, I check that nothing further is wanted, and then I excuse myself from the table to get the check/bill and discreetly pay at the service desk.

 

The only times I pay at a restaurant table are when I’m having dinner with my longstanding boyfriend, but then he even knows the security code for my credit card.

[cany10011]

It might have been easier to present the coupon up front to the server before ordering just to make sure it is accepted. Nothing wrong with being frugal. I wouldn’t have used a coupon, but that’s me. Most of the restaurants i like don’t really offer coupons.