SIR.

[hypothetically]

An increasing number of prospective clients are greeting me with “sir.” Would any clients care to elaborate what motivates one to call an escort “sir.”

 

I’m not naive, I know the context in which it is used is not purely formal salutations, but nor does my ad insinuate I’m into master/slave or dom/sub play, nor am I wearing a “master’s cap” in any of my photos. Is it motivated by race or is there just a huge influx of “bttm slaves,” gravitating towards me? I usually request they stop calling me “sir,” to which some respond “sorry, sir” LOL but idk..

 

I typically don’t entertain these inquiries as the language to follow usually isn’t appropriate nor does it come from a good place (i.e. “BBC,” theatrical interracial porn lingo). Sir is less ambiguous but still feels....

 

Thoughts?

Edited October 30, 2019 by hypothetically

[+ purplekow]

I get called sir all the time. Such as, sir can I help you across the street. Or sir, are you okay you look a bit ill.

I think in your case that there is definitely a racial overtone. There is not an influx of young sub bottoms, I think there has been an influx of people who no longer know where boundaries should exist. I Politeness, courtesy and respect for others has been on the decline for a long time and the current political leaders have taken the downhill slide and made it into a avalanche.

I am sorry that you are falling victim to other's ignorance. If their scene is the kind of interracial degradation you believe it to be, I would suggest you be blunt and just say at the first "sir" that you are not into degradation, so if that is what they are after, they need to troll other waters,

[+ poolboy48220]

It can't just be a term of respect to someone you've just met?

[hypothetically]

It can't just be a term of respect to someone you've just met?

 

lol, in the spaces and context it’s being used...no.

Edited October 29, 2019 by hypothetically

[BaronArtz]

Are you called Sir by European clients mostly? Sir or Madam is customary addressing someone you never met before … in Europe, mostly

[hypothetically]

Are you called Sir by European clients mostly? Sir or Madam is customary addressing someone you never met before … in Europe, mostly

 

While I initially picked up on this with American clients before moving abroad, now that you mention it, it does happen more frequently in Europe.

[Rick M]

I've had prospective escorts address me as sir, and they are not necessarily submissive. I interpret it as politeness and deference preceding some item of business, as in: "Should it please you, sir, I shall be attaching a 20% gratuity to your bill."

[hypothetically]

Then what do YOU think it means in the context?

 

When I use it in any context, I mean it as a token of respect

 

Reverse race-play which is a very much a thing. Master/slave play amongst two white men is not the same as master/slave play amongst a POC and a white man for a variety of reasons.

 

Additionally, there is an influx of white men who I feel address me “sir” because they automatically associate skin color, in a sexual context, with dominance hence sometimes the “sir” being accompanied with “white slave here for bbc” and similar language. Not always, but sometimes. So I guess I’m asking the forum, for peace of mind, why they would be motivated to use the word when contacting an escort.

[Walker1]

Then what do YOU think it means in the context?

 

When I use it in any context, I mean it as a token of respect

I was wondering too. Sir has always been a term of respect-at least to me.

[Walker1]

Reverse race-play which is a very much a thing. Master/slave play amongst two white men is not the same as master/slave play amongst a POC and a white man for a variety of reasons.

 

Additionally, there is an influx of white men who I feel address me “sir” because they automatically associate skin color, in a sexual context, with dominance hence sometimes the “sir” being accompanied with “white slave here for bbc” and similar language. Not always, but sometimes. So I guess I’m asking the forum, for peace of mind, why they would be motivated to use the word when contacting an escort.

Thanks, I wasn't aware of that world.

[rvwnsd]

Reverse race-play which is a very much a thing. Master/slave play amongst two white men is not the same as master/slave play amongst a POC and a white man for a variety of reasons.

 

Additionally, there is an influx of white men who I feel address me “sir” because they automatically associate skin color, in a sexual context, with dominance hence sometimes the “sir” being accompanied with “white slave here for bbc” and similar language. Not always, but sometimes. So I guess I’m asking the forum, for peace of mind, why they would be motivated to use the word when contacting an escort.

I think it is one of two things:

 

• The prospective client is being overly formal and polite
  
• The prospective client is awkwardly trying to engage in reverse race-play
  

If the first, then that's a good thing. If the second, then the client's first email should read something like "Hypothetically, I am into reverse-race play in which I call you 'sir' and blah, blah, blah. What are your thoughts on this scene?" It should not read "Sir, blah blah blah." Reverse-race play is not my thing (nor is race-play) and to each his own, but to assume you would get into reverse-race play simply because you are a muscular black man is rather insulting.

[MrMattBig]

To me Sir is like using Ma'am to address a woman.

Sometimes it is appropriate, other times it is not and inspires a hint of contempt in who you are addressing.

[dcguy20]

I have used the word "sir" for as long as I can remember. My use is a term for respect. I recently had a friend of mine call me out on it (he happens to be black). He took it in a dominant/ submissive context which was totally not my intention. The exchange was by text. Could it be a regional thing? I'm from New England. I even use the term at work.

 

That being said, how one interprets the word is based on their personal experience.

Edited October 30, 2019 by dcguy20

[rvwnsd]

...Sometimes it is appropriate, other times it is not and inspires a hint of contempt in who you are addressing.

What en excellent point!

 

I tease my boss by addressing her as ma'am and when she asks me to step into her office I will sometimes walk in and say "Ma'am, yes ma'am!" It is a joke and we both laugh. I don't do that with other women at work.

[+ bashful]

I was walking through my parking garage, and a car slowed down next to me. A much younger guy opened his window and said "excuse me sir, but where's parking space xyz". I said it was on the lower level. He said thank you sir. Didn't bother me.

[+ azdr0710]

maybe I'm just not that into wringing my hands over the nuances of interpersonal relationships and the subtle undertones of suspected racial identity intercultural communication.......

 

but, jeez, is all this even worth really worrying about?.......maybe the guys are just being polite and professional???.......or am I too simple to participate in this thread??!!

 

[hypothetically]

maybe I'm just not that into wringing my hands over the nuances of interpersonal relationships and the subtle undertones of suspected racial identity intercultural communication.......

 

but, jeez, is all this even worth really worrying about?.......maybe the guys are just being polite and professional???.......or am I too simple to participate in this thread??!!

 

 

Are any of these threads really worth the countless number of pages they accrue? Not really, yet here we are. But I chose a topic that has not been regurgitated innumerable times to start a healthy discussion about context. You could always, idk, keep it moving, sir.

[RealAvalon]

An increasing number of prospective clients are greeting me with “sir.” Would any clients care to elaborate what motivates one to call an escort “sir.”

 

I’m not naive, I know the context in which it is used is not purely formal salutations, but nor does my ad insinuate I’m into master/slave or dom/sub play, nor am I wearing a “master’s cap” in any of my photos. Is it motivated by race or is there just a huge influx of “bttm slaves,” gravitating towards me? I usually request they stop calling me “sir,” to which some respond “sorry, sir” LOL but idk..

 

I typically don’t entertain these inquiries as the language to follow usually isn’t appropriate nor does it come from a good place (i.e. “BBC,” theatrical interracial porn lingo). Sir is less ambiguous but still feels....

 

Thoughts?

Might be an age thing.

[RealAvalon]

An increasing number of prospective clients are greeting me with “sir.” Would any clients care to elaborate what motivates one to call an escort “sir.”

 

I’m not naive, I know the context in which it is used is not purely formal salutations, but nor does my ad insinuate I’m into master/slave or dom/sub play, nor am I wearing a “master’s cap” in any of my photos. Is it motivated by race or is there just a huge influx of “bttm slaves,” gravitating towards me? I usually request they stop calling me “sir,” to which some respond “sorry, sir” LOL but idk..

 

I typically don’t entertain these inquiries as the language to follow usually isn’t appropriate nor does it come from a good place (i.e. “BBC,” theatrical interracial porn lingo). Sir is less ambiguous but still feels....

 

Thoughts?

Could be a simple age thing, nothing complicated.

[Dmitri]

Context is important. This is not a situation of you being in a store, checking in at a hotel, being in the general public outside your job, etc. It is being used by clients answering an escort ad. Sounds to me like they are into master/slave, etc. and are just feeling you out to see if you reciprocate when they call you "Sir". If you play along that is a green light that you are into that scene. If you throw water on that fire, then they know you are not into it. You said an "increasing number" are doing this, not just one person, so it is a red flag that it is a master/slave thing going on. Calling an escort "Sir" is pretty obvious what they are looking for, especially when it is happening often from clients answering an escort ad.

Edited October 30, 2019 by Dmitri

[hypothetically]

Usually the simpler explanation explanation is the right one. Right?

 

But alas, context matters

 

Occam’s Razor has a double edge. But, yes.

[+ newatthis]

Occam’s Razor has a double edge. But, yes.

Did they have double-edged razors in Occam's time?

[hypothetically]

Did they have double-edged razors in Occam's time?

 

(Shoulder shrug) idk, I’m like 16.

[BaronArtz]

When I had a profile on adam4adam, I was sometimes called 'Sir' by younger, submissive men. I don't think it was any more complicated than that. I understand that from an escort's perspective, it could be different.

[hypothetically]

When I had a profile on adam4adam, I was sometimes called 'Sir' by younger, submissive men. I don't think it was any more complicated than that. I understand that from an escort's perspective, it could be different.

 

..and a black one. And just for clarification I’m not race-baiting nor am I the type to pull the race card or scream “that’s racist,” but I think it’s important for everyone to note that my, our, experience navigating escorting is very different from everyone else’s. That’s why I posed this question. Thanks for the insight everyone.