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Now THAT'S a headline you don't see everyday!


samhexum

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29 minutes ago, samhexum said:

Oral sex sends Florida man crashing into FedEx truck

It was a head-on collision — literally.

A distracted Florida man receiving oral sex smashed directly into a FedEx truck in Ft. Lauderdale Thursday night, injuring his groin.

The unidentified man and his female companion were both found partially naked after the collision...

https://nypost.com/2022/06/03/oral-sex-sends-florida-man-crashing-into-fedex-truck/

 

Beyond the misfortune of the crash, the article states "However, the SUV driver’s penis was “nearly bitten off,” according to the Daily Mail — presumably because the impact caused his companion to bite down," adding a tragic dimension to "toothy blowjob."

 

 

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11 hours ago, samhexum said:

Naked son of ex-judge jumps to his death from co-op after killing mom

So I guess you could say he flew the co[-]op...

BTW, not a bad-looking guy.  His sister looks exactly like him.

murder-suicide.jpg?quality=75&strip=all

He murdered his mother who is in the far right in the photo. According to the New York post,  other residents were shocked because no history of problems within the family., Until the murder

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California cop pulls over driver for speeding with 8,000-pound potato

potato-tour-featured.jpg?quality=75&stri

potato-tour-03.jpg?quality=75&strip=all

Indy Lights motorsport driver Sting Ray Robb, 21, peeled through the fan village of the Firestone Grand Prix of Monterey lugging the mammoth faux potato, which measured 72 feet long and 13 feet high, the Idaho Statesman reported.

A video posted on Twitter shows a bemused Robb holding up the tater ticket which cited him for driving a vehicle that was 12,000 pounds overweight, and for going 63 mph in a 55 mph zone.

The vegetable has been deemed a traveling ambassador for the state, which produces nearly one-third of all potatoes grown in the US.

If real, the 4-ton potato – the equivalent of 1,562 regular-sized potatoes– would produce 20,217 servings of mashed potatoes or 1 million average-sized french fries, according to the Idaho Potato Commission.

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On 10/10/2022 at 5:25 PM, samhexum said:

California cop pulls over driver for speeding with 8,000-pound potato

potato-tour-featured.jpg?quality=75&stri

potato-tour-03.jpg?quality=75&strip=all

Indy Lights motorsport driver Sting Ray Robb, 21, peeled through the fan village of the Firestone Grand Prix of Monterey lugging the mammoth faux potato, which measured 72 feet long and 13 feet high, the Idaho Statesman reported.

A video posted on Twitter shows a bemused Robb holding up the tater ticket which cited him for driving a vehicle that was 12,000 pounds overweight, and for going 63 mph in a 55 mph zone.

The vegetable has been deemed a traveling ambassador for the state, which produces nearly one-third of all potatoes grown in the US.

If real, the 4-ton potato – the equivalent of 1,562 regular-sized potatoes– would produce 20,217 servings of mashed potatoes or 1 million average-sized french fries, according to the Idaho Potato Commission.

That works out to 50 french fries per serving of mashed potato. That seems about right when you consider how many fries accompany the main course in most restaurants. I can only get through about 15 the odd time I order them.

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Oh, those violent Aussies!

2 men charged for blinding e-scooter rider with projectile potato

Two young men accused of firing potatoes at e-scooter riders, which left one person blind in one eye, have faced court.

Trent Phillip Green, 19, and Brandon John Nutu Micicoi, 20, are both charged with a string of offenses, including causing grievous bodily harm, over the alleged attack near Mettams Pool in Trigg, in Perth’s north, about 9.30 a.m. on May 20.

Potatoes were allegedly fired or thrown at people from a passing car on West Coast Drive.

A 28-year-old man suffered a fractured arm and facial injuries which required surgery to remove his eye, police said.

When I was a young'n, a friend of mine got hit in the nose with a thrown potato.  I don't remember the circumstances, but he was called 'Mr. Potato Nose' for awhile after that.

Green and Micicoi briefly appeared in Perth Magistrates Court on Friday but did not enter a plea.

They were arrested this week after a police investigation which included a public appeal for information.

Inspector Brett Baddock said this week that police would allege the “dangerous act” was planned but not targeted at any one individual.

“It would appear those involved thought it would be fun to use potatoes as projectiles aimed at people minding their own business and enjoying our coastal strip,” he said.

“This so-called fun has ended in tragedy, with the victim losing one eye.”

In addition to the grievous bodily harm charge, Mr. Green is facing one count of acts likely to endanger the life, health or safety of any person, as well as one count of possessing a prohibited weapon.

Micicoi has also been charged with one count of acts likely to endanger the life, health or safety of any person, as well as three counts of common assault.

The matter was adjourned until November 17.

Thank God I live in NYC, not that lawless dystopian society down under.

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