tenderloin

I have tried it with 'scorts who were already friends, and honestly it felt a bit rote - like an old vaudeville routine being trotted out again. What has worked best for me is to find two guys who don't know each other but are turned on by each other's profiles. I confirm in advance what everyone agrees to do (no holes barred). I find that the excitement of a exploring the other guy's body for the first time adds a lot to the session.

At the risk of sounding a bit jaded: in some service professions (waiter, masseur, bell hop, etc.) there is a certain type of straight guy who knows he is good looking and who has a high degree of self confidence and enjoys flirting with other (usually older) guys in the hopes of getting a generous tip. They would never cross the line, but if a suggestive glance or a subtle package adjustment gets them a $twenty, so be it.

In 15 years of hiring, I have gotten taken twice: As per Aaron James' comment above, a loan (in this case only $120 for "school books") from an adorable twink turned out to be the last contact I had with him. A little scarier was a backpage hire. He wasn't delivering (wouldn't kiss, wouldn't bottom, wouldn't suck dick) so I called a halt to the session and asked him to leave. He asked for a towel; when I returned to my bedroom he was in a different part of the room and appeared to have been prying. I later discovered that he had gone into my dresser drawer and lifted about $250 in cash. Ever since then, I have been careful with first-time hires to hide the valuables and keep the guys in my sight at all times.

Obviously, you are not spending $300 to just sit silently and stare at his face. But escorts are human beings providing an entertainment service and we should treat them as such. It's like when you pay money to see a concert or comedian and yeah sometimes the band doesn't play your favorite song or the comedian isn't funny. That doesn't mean you get to demand a refund at the end of the performance.

 

I feel bad about the experience of the OP and feel that the escort should have done a better job being ready to perform. But I think it's absolutely ridiculous and unfair to ask for a refund to an escort who shows up on time, does his best in the situation to perform for you (but cannot) and is willing to try to make something fun happen in the time that you have together. This is exactly the case according to the OP's description of events.

 

It can be hard the first time when you have a lot of built up expectations of what you're "supposed" to get as a client, but reality often doesn't meet our expectations. This has happened to me multiple times hiring (though probably only one out of every 10 or so) and with experience I have learned that through communication and adaptability, you can usually still have a great time even if you don't get 100 percent what you originally wanted.

 

It's completely ridiculous to say that just because you didn't get exactly what you want, that you shouldn't have to pay the escort for his time. That's some self-entitled BS and is I think an attitude that leads a lot of escorts to increasingly give up on continuing in the profession.

To be clear, I'm not saying anything re the OP's obligation with regard to the fee. I just think it ridiculous that some still delude themselves with the "you're only paying for his time" routine. That can be your response to the vice squad (good luck with that), but around here it lacks credibility.

I believe 100% that you should still pay them for the agreed upon rate. Remember you are paying for time, not for sex. It is an unfortunate circumstance and one that has happened to me. But I have paid 100 percent every time.

 

What I have done is say something like, "Well this is a bit disappointing as I was hoping we would be able to do X." Sometimes the session can still be saved and a good professional truly will attempt to do so. Maybe he offers a discount or gives you a bit more time or does an alternative activity that leaves you (at least somewhat) satisfied with his services. This is a discussion you need to have with the escort and you certainly should not assume you will get any discounts and never that you will not have to pay him for his time.

 

But in many cases, we've been able to figure something out. In one case, I put on some porn that he liked on the TV and that seemed to take care of the problem and also gave me an additional hour at no cost so we could relax and reset. Another time with long-time regular ended up turning it into a hot fisting session. Another brought out some fun toys. And yes sometimes you end up a bit disappointed by the experience, just like a lot Grindr hookups seem like they'll be hotter before they actually happen. And that's why we have Daddy's and this forum to avoid guys that are flaky or have constant performance issues.

 

In the end though, you are paying for the escort's time and if he fulfills that time, you should pay him. Of course, he should fulfill your other wants and desires as well. But they're only human and things happen.

Do we really need to trot out the "paying for time, not for sex" fiction yet again like some sort of blanket excuse? Yes, I know that there is a legal fiction that some like to stick to, but seriously it's just plain silly to put it forward on these pages as if it was in any way relevant. Does anyone in this forum truly believe that with all of the discussion of sexual positions, appearance/endowment, kiss or no, raw or sheathed, cum or no, etc. that we are thinking about spending $300 an hour for someone's time? The OP was not paying for time, he had communicated a specific scenario which was agreed to in advance.

Reminds me of that classic old movie line: "I'd love to kiss ya, but I just washed my hair."

A hookworm needs a host to survive, but, it is, in fact, living.

That's what I love about this site: the great questions are explored here, from "what is the essence of life - how do we define a living thing?" to "is his cock really that big or is that a photoshop job?"

I don't know how much of his perfect, glistening body is real, how much is make-up, and how much is photoshop (and bless him if it's all real) , but to me he is a little too-much like a mannequin -- too perfect, too plastic, too designed. Give me a fit, trim, natural-looking guy anytime.

Gee, I wish I knew when I was younger that getting someone else to pay my bills was a form of escort service. I missed my calling....

The 2-1-1 method is more commonly used and accepted outside of the US. Many folks abroad say that our use of the daily pill approach is just another example of big pharma making sure that they can sell us more pills.. Not being a medical pro, I can't weigh in on the virtues of one approach versus the other. But as someone who has sex infrequently (twice or three times a month is a good month), I struggle to justify the daily pill regime and required frequent doctor visits.

Sodomy as a criminal offense is/has often(been) defined to include certain non-procreative sex acts regardless of who is involved. Thus, anal sex between a husband and wife was considered sodomy.

I know that it WAS a criminal offense, hence my tongue-in-cheek reference to Oscar Wilde (is tongue in cheek also sodomy?). My point is that I haven't heard of anyone being charged with it since Cade was a toddler.

https://pornstarmugshots.blogspot.com/search?q=Cade

Gee, the list of charges for Jeb of Sean Cody includes "sodomy" Is there someplace where that is still an offense? I mean, who with? Oscar Wilde?

You have wonderful taste. 2, 4, and 5 light my fire, but all look yummy

I think NY has the widest range of rates of any place. Yes, the uber-wealthy Wall Streeters and lawyers can provide a market for the uber-expensive providers, but there is also a wealth of under-employed wanna-be actors/models, blue collar guys looking for a little extra cash, and boys off the bus from Iowa sleeping on their buddy's couch in the Bronx. I for one don't go for the perfectly-worked bodies and the pristinely-coiffed hair at $500 an hour when I can get the boy next door look or the pizza delivery man at half that rate : )

There was a young latin guy I saw regularly in NYC (more than 15 times over two years). He was an NYU student and he had some pretty significant mood disorder issues (deep depressive swings) and a tough life over all. He used to hang out post-coitus and we had lovely long chats, and sometime he just talked and talked and cried (and no, he didn't charge me for the time - I should have charged him LOL). One day he texted me that he was in desperate need of about $200 for some school books, and coupled it with saying that he was no longer going to escort but that he wanted to see me from time to time just to hang out. I venmo'ed the money and he immediately stopped returning texts and phone calls. It wasn't a big financial loss, but it stung. I felt foolish. Lesson learned.

He's been talked about on here before. Used to go by ConnerBKN when he 1st popped up on RM last year. Good reviews for the most part, including a meeting with board member @Hung_Cody .

 

https://www.companyofmen.org/threads/connerbkn-rentmen-nyc.153230/#post-1826623

Thanks so much. Another reminder of the value of this community ; )

I hate the name, but the pics look lovely. Any experience or insight would be welcomed!

https://rentmen.eu/scruffypuppy/

Agree with both xyz48B and StLouisOct above. There are few things that kill my boner faster than the realization that the guy I am with is genuinely not enjoying himself (over the years, I've sent a few 'scorts packing when it was clear that they didn't want to be there). Although some providers find it annoying, I am definitely one for up-front transparency: "this is who I am (age, weight, height, looks) and this is what I like to do. Is that something you can get into?"

Thank you Orville. I have been chuckling all day at that image of Kermit.

As a small business person with an hourly rate, I have no right to be pissed off if I ask a client "what do you want to pay?" and they come back with a lowball offer. If price is an issue and I want the business, I can choose to offer a discount: "my normal rate is $250 per hour, but I will offer you a 20% discount for our introductory session." Once you invite negotiation, that's what you get: a negotiation.

Personally I find the competitive pissing contests, however friendly vs hostile, among real and often prolific posters more off-putting. That is: writing about how others write or think. It tends to fizzle through exhaustion rather than armistice or resolution. It can be like a study seminar from hell. Yet outside of signs of antipathy the participants may be whip smart and are paradoxically eroding the value of their input.

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Thanks for this. I have been stunned by the vitriol from some of the prolific posters who decide that they alone are the arbiters of, well, everything, which gives them the right to label, libel, belittle, insult, and accuse. It takes much not to stoop to their level and fling the poo back at them.

Before each meeting, I strip off the good sheets and put on the shag sheets. Even though I launder the shag sheets diligently after each, um, "use," they bear the scars of encounters past. Heck, looking at them now I see that they're starting to resemble a Pollack painting LOL. Time for a new set of shaggers, I guess.

And the word COVID has yet to appear in this thread?

And your point is? The word "covid" is a bit redundant, don't you think? It would have to appear in every thread on this site, in that even providers who only see one client a day would carry substantially more risk than your average guy. I have chosen not to see any pros since March for just this reason.

Recently? A nice guy, and he really is well hung, but caveat emptor: some of those pics are the ones he was using when I hired him in NYC 15 years ago (and no, that is not an exaggeration). I'd ask for a recent selfie before taking the plunge.

The performance issue is a big one for me. I have been in several situations over the years where the pro refused to cum (especially when hiring early in the day -- gotta save it up for the long night ahead!) or was drained and couldn't cum more than a micro-drop. This is frustrating, especially since I make clear that a nice splash is close to the top of my wish list.