JB_Studio38

That’s a good way to do it. However some just have a knack for doing it again. There was a client in one area who I’d seen more than a couple times. He’d try to schedule, but then something come up...I was considerate of the circumstances but informed of my cancellation policy. But then we made plans to follow up later in the month when I was back in the area, which I did...and something else came up. No offer to reimburse either time. So no more for him. I know some are reading and thinking, “gay sex and escorts are supposed to be fun and non-committal. Why so much hassle?” And it is. 100%. But don’t let it become so fun and non-committal that basic courtesy just goes out the window. It’s not that hard. I don’t get why these guys make it so hard. I don’t need a reason, I just need courtesy. That way I can decide for myself, the next move. One guy years ago cancelled for no reason on the 2nd meet, but sent me $500 without my even asking. I have a friend who is a wedding planner, any clients who flake on him, he keeps the deposit. Clients flaking starts off innocent, but tends to cause real life issues for the escort.

No therapist needed. I’ve already surveyed and analyzed how these things work. A therapist would only sit and listen, and tell me how I can reframe my thoughts...but the dynamic wouldn’t change. I know it seems crazy to say what I said, and surely it’s off topic. But it’s true. Sad, but true. I have noticed in many areas outside of the main metropolitan cities, majority of Black guys I have come across who are actually doing half decent for themselves, and have a relationship going, are “generally straight” and partnered with White women. Period. I have very rarely EVER seen a Black guy who’s gay and happily partnered, or even partnered at all...in rural America and areas outside of your main metropolitan cities: DC, Chicago, LA, etc. And in the smaller markets like Kansas Shitty, Nashville, and Columbus, it’s more of a “it can happen” sort of thing, but only if you’ve got the connections. Otherwise, forget about it. But only reason I brung that up is because the fact I’m tired of just everybody in the gay comms bullshit in general. There’s a guy I’ve been “talking to” where we met one time. Once. Like back in March or April. We just could not get around to meeting the 2nd time. We lived 1 state over, but it wasn’t a long stretch to meet because I was often in his area on more than 1 occasion, but it was always an excuse. We kept in touch regularly up until last month, then the other week he tells me he’s in a relationship and they’re not open. And I’m supposed to be fucking, giving chance after chance in my professional life to a client? That 1 chance they do the “ghost” or the last minute cancel, it clearly sets the stage for more of the same down the line...that’s why I’m more willing to burn bridges more so nowadays. I did that before with clients, and that was the same way I ended up losing my condo that I worked so hard for over 5 years maintaining: because some fucking idiot clients, one who was a regular, kept standing me up time after time and I kept giving chances. I was already behind on my payments at the time due to the shutting of rentboy, they just stuck the dagger in and twisted it, making it worse. And the client today talking he’s going to get his lawyer and sue me for asking my cancellation fee. I’d LOVE to go to court. I said, Matter of fact, let me do the favor for you: I’ll go to your city tomorrow and file in small claims for the session you flaked on, and make it easier for you. Since I already have all your information. How about THAT lol. I’m thinking to myself, he had time to say all of that, but didn’t have time to say, “today is hectic, let’s reschedule for...” Just blatant disregard for the profession. And they wonder why I don’t care either ??‍♂️

Everything you said sounds great and reasonable. BUT... What does that have to do with a client not following thru when they arrange a second meet? Sure they may have perfectly reasonable reasons to not show up, but they weren’t too busy to text me initially. And then to not say anything at all? Like I’ve been arguing with 2 (1 of now is a former) clients this evening about that. If something came up, just say it. Why play this passive aggressive game like something devastating happened to you, then when I text them they are blacklisted, suddenly they want to respond with 1,000 texts as to how I’m so in the wrong. This goes back to what I was saying a few threads ago: I just don’t understand men anymore. I think I want to not be gay anymore. Maybe I’ll have better luck with White women like many Black men seem to have. Too many gay men are garbage and a joke. I can’t deal with this shit no more. I’m going to turn myself straight ? I feel numb to black lives matter, because I know to majority in the gay community, black lives only matter when you’re doing the same shit they’re doing, and they think being around you makes them look a little bit better. Any other time, they don’t give a goddamn fuck about it otherwise.

That sounds at-least halfway manageable. I haven’t seen a client in Kansas City since Labor Day, except one attempted booking who didn’t want to pay a deposit. (because it involves me driving to the “in” parts of town, getting a hotel, and likely be the only appointment I get that day. which makes no sense to NOT want to have something upfront). And there doesn’t seem to be any other bookings in sight for this week. Most likely it’ll be something last minute, where they want me to host, but don’t want to confirm. Predictable. But I was able to schedule a different client later in the week in a different town about 2 hours away. I almost don’t feel ashamed to say it was a waste of time. It was just 1 hour, and I had to get a hotel, and it was the only client I booked that day. Normally that area would simply be a “Stop and Go” destination, but considering it was a Friday night, I was hoping for the best. If I don’t leave the business, I definitely need to leave this region and never look back. This is the epitome of sex workers living in poverty. And I was never intending to be in those circumstances.

But here’s the thing: what I meant by getting a “pass”, clients shouldn’t be like, “oh he’s an escort, he doesn’t care about me. Therefore me hitting him up, faking an appointment and not going thru with it shouldn’t matter”. That’s petty and childish. And I’d assume people who do are likely as such. In a way it’s basically trying to “gauge” whether the provider actually cares about the client, by flaking out on a 2nd meet. “Let me bail on this session, and see what happens. Then let me contact him a few months later and pretend it didn’t happen” ? It’s obviously something behind It. I personally wouldn’t expect any respect if I did. It’s already been 3 times actually this month, where a previously met client bailed on meeting up and then didn’t bother to reschedule or follow up with sort of explanation. Even though I can walk away and be done, that’s also a lost of expected earnings. I can walk away and be done, after they reimburse me. If they want to ignore it, that’s when I have to escalate it. At that point, they’ll know their bridges are burnt. I had a new client earlier this year pull something similar. I was extra annoyed because I’d spent a whole extra 2 days in South Florida in between another client...then he bailed. He kept ignoring reimbursing me for the session. Few days later when he seen what the next solution was going to be, he immediately sent it no questions asked.

If you are assuming whether that should be a “pass” for someone to stand someone up, I would certainly hope not. But I certainly wouldn’t care about them once they show they don’t care about me. At that point; we might as well just be enemies because they’ve already proven to not have any regard for me, once they’ve gotten what they wanted.

And that I understand. But my thing is, why lie about it? If a person isn’t going to be able to do the session, don’t fake as if they want to do it. To me, it just says they don’t give a ? about me as a person or the interaction. Just playing games and not taking me seriously at all. At one point, I’ve just been more on the side of burning the bridges with them, than to give 2nd chances. Once they do that, the trust and transaction is over for me unless they fully reimburse for the lost session.

Twice. 2 different previously met clients where both sessions went very well (and they all followed up to let me know so). Had prospective appointments yesterday and today, and both failed to follow up. Not even a “cant make it today” (which isn’t much better, but atleast it shows signs of life. The usual remedy would be to lay out my cancellation policy, and include that they will be blacklisted if no other response given. But lately I’ve been trying to be more forgiving and not “hold it against them”. Sometimes I wonder though, if they do the shit on purpose just to mess with us. So rather than play into it, I’m working to just silently blacklist them...so when they try and hit me up again, they’ll know I haven’t forgotten. It’ll be case of, “hi, I noticed on September 13th, 2000 and...., you scheduled an appointment and didn’t show up. Why should I trust that you’ll show up this time around?” And the worse part, they usually always pick the wrong time to mess me around. Like when I’m going thru a not very good week at the moment. Like they just push me to that point where I want to react. Should I be evil? Maybe, maybe it’s not ?

lol, I can’t help but admit that actually sounds like a nice side job! “Bathhouse security patrol”. Sounds like a perfect start to a porn flick ??‍♂️

well, I would almost say I think we as “Internet” escorts have bridged that gap. I would say most of my clients are the married/partnered type who are DL or half way out the closet. But that can also be an issue as it usually always requires us to host, and often not being able to confirm via pay app deposits.

In that case I might as well forget about trying to get into this incall location I been considering moving to. I have to be able to show I’m making 3.5x the monthly rent, and that’s barely even happening. And that’s what clients don’t understand. Lately it seems the majority want us to host, but how are we supposed to be able to maintain accommodations at this rate. That’s why lately the only way I’ve been hosting is by appointment, in hotel, with a deposit. But even that has become tedious. All I need is 2 to 4 outcalls a week on a steady base. That’s not even happening. I’ve had 2 outcalls in the last 2 weeks. And only 1 incall in the past week ?

Any updates? I noticed some people came out to play since Labor Day, but in my area it’s still been pretty slowed up. Only had 2 clients last week, but nothing this weekend. I’m seriously thinking about retiring for a bit. If I end up coming into this windfall, I’m leaving. The biz has become so far removed from making real money, it’s just becoming not even worth it right now. I’m just about ready to quit. This whole last week, I’ve just been pretty much in a state of trying to figure a way out. Doesn’t help that I’m in shitty market to begin with, but I can’t seem to get to a point where I can leave.

Yeah it’s kind of like comparing Miami and Houston. I suppose you could use your imagination, and pretend you are in Miami while in Houston. But it’s not going to Miami. Or LA, for that matter. Even though the 2 share similar qualities. It’s always going to be that 1 “something” that reminds you it’s not quite comparable.

Definitely not similar cities. Chicago is midwestern and New York is east coast. Also much more expansive. People in other states will say they’re from Chicago, that could be like someone from Burbank saying I’ve not really spent a lot of time in New York, but Florida has a lot of New York influence to where I feel I’ve been there for awhile. I know some cities are trying to trend to being the next Chicago alternative: St. Louis, Denver and Minneapolis. I personally wasn’t able to find my niche in Chicago...from escort perspective. It’s a big city with lots of competitors, but it’s fun to go with friends. However, the crime factor is certainly a factor. Never had anything happen to me there, but I’ve seen the fights break out after the gay bars on the south side... I try to avoid cities with too many of ‘us’ folks as it is. Its often a struggle as a minority myself, and never seems to improve my bottom line financially. I’m having that issue lately in Kansas City. Just dead, day after day after day. Nothing steady happening. I been alternating staying in St. Louis, but even there it hasn’t been any significant improvement. It’s just been barely getting by. Me thinks it’s time to hit a major metropolis like SF or New York/Boston myself. But if you’re already situated with a job and housing, by all means...it’ll be great.

I only CHOSE to give one example that coincides with this time 20 years ago. Since you’re so motivated about proof, prove to me that people weren’t afraid to fly for a much longer time after that. I highly doubt it was back normal after 6 months. Did you forget about Anthrax? That was like a year later. I don’t think people felt “normal” until Bin Laden in 2011 and Suddam Hussein in 2006. 9/11 and the threat of terrorism was constantly on the headlines just about everyday up until mass shootings started making headlines. There was no “normal”, it was just people doing what the heck they needed to do: and that was to get to where they needed to go. It was NEVER back to normal. And don’t forget about the shoe bombing incident after that time as well. that said, this is getting political. I’m walking ?? ? away ??

Maybe this will be better fitted to your question. You DEFINITELY can’t tell me people weren’t afraid to travel after that. I wasn’t in the business at that time, but I don’t know what kind of hits the industry sustained after that time. Maybe @Kevin Slater could chime in with some insight...

For this reasons and others, I’m “considering” discontinuing my membership on A4A for a little while. Even though it is just $30, the quality of provider AND client seems to question the purpose. It seems to work better in some markets than others, but it’s hard to tell when and where it’ll be handy. If not using it in a reliable market where you can get clients already from Rentmen and others to begin with, it probably won’t make much of a difference. Like in places like Kansas City, Orlando and Los Angeles, A4A isn’t going to fix the already underperforming market in which other websites are based on. It’s also tedious to have to keep logging in because people there don’t treat it like an ad, they just try to get free chat time rather than contact direct and schedule a visit.

Too late, I’m already having champagne ? ? yeah, I think it’s too soon for guys to be headlining: “tested positive for coronavirus antibodies, so I can’t give it to you...” It’s not exactly HIV and prep. It’s just too soon to actually tell. For all we know, or don’t know, having antibodies could equate to being “positive” for life, just like HIV. That’s why I’m just like fuck it, expect every day a new discovery will come out... perhaps it’ll mate with seasonal pollen and dooms us all. But gotta keep on trucking, regardless. Everytime they say it’s the end of the world, it’s not. Bills still end up due

Well I should mention, even though my handle on here is new, I’ve been around quite awhile lol. Review wise, I have a good number on rentmasseur and rentmen. It certainly does help. But I should also probably take into perspective that I am not located in a big city market, and actually haven’t since I left Florida back in April (and even then, I still don’t consider any of the Florida locations “big city market” except Miami/Ft Lauderdale which doesn’t count because the providers out number the hiring pool in both locations. For every client, there’s like 10 escorts to choose from). I’ve been based in medium sized Midwest towns all summer and haven’t done any big trips to the coasts yet. But I’m sure places like San Fran, DC and...some other cities probably still have the 250-300 range. So it’s not to say it’s not going to be workable across the board. But it bears taking into consideration that it could go both ways: maybe guys in cities are needing to charge less, maybe guys in the small cities are needing to charge less. Take a place like Omaha Nebraska. Rates across the board are fairly nonexistent or perceivably low. But I do have clients there who have given 250-350. So it’s not out of the question. But for sustainability efforts, I’ve also offered sessions as low as 150 if I was in the mood to do so and that’s what was on the table.

okay, I don’t know how we ended up here, but I’m not fixing to be going back and re-arguing all over again about whether the pandemic is worse than any of the other things that have occurred since the start of 2000 (and yes, I know people stay put after hurricanes, I lived in Florida for 20 years Including during the 4 hurricanes that hit in 2004/2005ish, and then moved back 10 years later...when the pulse nightclub shooting and Irma hit. And the same Queens are still living in Orlando til this day lol). By the way: I didn’t refer that the protests are HELPING Trump and republicans, I meant they are USING it to help Trump and Republicans. I just seen on Fox News how they are blaming democrat run states for fires and protests, and saying how we won’t be safe in Biden’s America (ironic considering all this shit is happening under Trump’s govern). CNN on the other hand is using the coronavirus numbers in the U.S. and future predictions to help the Democratic Party, considering the message seems to be: Trump is not effectively dealing with the pandemic.

thankyou! but as you said, that’s where it gets difficult. I find myself trying to “win” the sale regardless. I’m just not in a position to turn down clients if they can’t pay extra for some things. Like the other day: I did a session where the guy wanted to watch me do his hot husband ? Normally I ask for 300 for 3 way sessions, but he said he couldn’t do that much. I went ahead and offered a slightly lower donation, but it was still reasonable. It was fun and easy and I didn’t feel regret about it, but it was still not the amount I preferred. But it was okay considering it wasn’t an actual 3way. I try to work with people to get an idea of their price point and budget, because never really know. At the same time, if it’s something ridiculous like $150 for two hours full service, I won’t eagerly accept that. That’s a good way to do it. I do the same because it does say, “yes I’m professional, but here’s a little real life me”. But I lied when I said I am not bothered by the selfie pics. It is annoying because it makes Rentmen look like Grindr, and back when Rentboy was around, if you had a gold or platinum membership, you had some very talented photographers taking pics. That was and still is for me, one of the best parts of escorting: doing photo shoots and going to different cities and meeting big name photographers.

Well, that's the downside of Rentmen not allowing advertising of rates. I'm curious how you would know, considering you're not trying to hire? Are you just surfing ? the guys to see how much they charge, only to tell them it's too much? That's kinda cruel lol. I ask because I have to explain to guys: don't tell me my rate is too much if you don't know the logistics behind it. Sure I can charge $150, but then what if that's the only session I get all day? People don't understand it's expensive to be a Rentman. I'm constantly hemorrhaging money throughout the month lol. Whether it's hotels or transportation, it adds up. At the same time, I understand $200 is a lot of money. A person can buy a lot with $250 or even $150, so I'm eternally grateful for everyone who comes to see me. At the same time, if I suggest a certain price, it's not to be greedy: it's the value in my service and to offset my expenses involved in the biz. Because these companies constantly drain our finances. Just this week: I paid $343 in car repairs. Then, I had to get a hotel to host today in another town, because Kansas city is slow as shit. Fortunately I had reward points. But I've only had 2 clients this week. So yeah, I try to get clients to understand that I really don't do appointments under $200. Thankfully, it does seem like the "can you do it for $100" crowd has evolved into understanding.

Considering there’s plenty of threads brimming right now, figured I’d try to multi-task and include a 2 in 1. First is: Occasionally I’ll browse a city just to get an idea how many are listed in an area. I noticed today in a certain location, I was the only one who had professional (non selfie/camera phone) pics on the main RentMen page. Why does it seem like the industry has gone so far away from getting professional pics done? I recall at some point, it almost seemed like a requirement to have professional pics, if you were expecting to make some real numbers. I mean, it doesn’t bother me...but I don’t know if RentMen realizes it makes the site look sketchy and lowered in value than what it should be, when you have a bunch of guys taking out of focus selfie pics. Which leads me to the next... 2nd: is there a shift in rates happening? Or should it just happen anyway? It seems like $200 and $300 are still attainable, but there seems to be more “I can’t do that much, money is tight” going around. Which is understandable. But are we going to eventually be reverting back to $150-200 as being the dominant price range across the board? Versus $250-$300? I hear people say they get multiple clients per day, but I’d be curious to know what rates they are asking in order to get those numbers. Some guys will say they get 5 clients a day, but then will say they charge $80. Obviously that is a different structure versus someone getting 1 or 2 clients per week at $250.

Well thankyou for bringing up your story. If you want to know the truth, I actually have something similar to vitiligo on my hands as well. I hate it, but I manage it and am aware of it. Eventually I do want to see if I can have a dermatologist (which I recall seeing years ago in my school days, but only gave me some cream was nothing more than glorified dry skin ointment). As for dude’s dental situation...I don’t have to offer to pay for anything because he has dental insurance/coverage. I had just said previously that a recent dental visit he had revealed an issue that needed to be fixed (which he gladly offered to tell me about). I wouldn’t take anything back TBH. I said it, and glad I said it. The truth will set you free. I wanted to know for myself, whether he understood that his teeth could use work, and it was a bother outside of the bedroom (and I say outside because generally, sex wise he’s good at that and has a decent looking body, cock, and ass). But, leading up to that, and afterwards...I like to know inside that I’m comfortable with a person’s whole being. That said, we are still friends and things are a good terms now. It still bothers me, but now he knows. I’m not going to be one of those fake escorts who will play the part long as their is money involved. I’m going to be a real ass person to mention things if it bothers me. Obviously certain things can’t be cured and fixed. But many things can. I know for me, my barber kept harping on how I was going bald at the top of my head. I would get offended, but recently began a propecia and rogaine regime...because I have a good overall hair left, but if I didn’t take care of the bald spot, it’s just going to keep getting worse. So I chose to do something about it in the interim. I know some guys look sexy bald, but I’ve got a cranium slightly shaped like a peanut, so that’s not the route I wish to take lol

Actually it's perfectly right. I'm sure at the time, that tragedy of that magnitude made people fearful of cruises and ocean travel for a long time. At the same time, television wasn't invented yet...so maybe it was to a lesser extent. Let's not lie to ourselves and ADMIT: constant television access to the pandemic and riots do invade our personal spaces and create fear. I honestly believe: the police killings leading to the protests, along with the "framing" by suspect individuals.. are designed to helping the Republican party. The coronavirus and Trump's accused lack of handling it and it's stardom in the lime light, is helping the democrats. I just take everything in perspective. My grandma died 5 years ago and I sat bedside every day for a month, seeing the cancer (and medications) get progressively worse. We just heard the other week, the star of black panther died of colon cancer. So...it's like, the fuck does it matter? No point in working tirelessly to dodge 1 bullet, when there's a whole army to defeat. I'm not saying don't do anything or that coronavirus isn't a real deadly thing, but...life must go on regardless.