JB_Studio38

So when you say you cancelled: At what point in the conversation was it? There are many traveling masseurs: are you reading reviews and checking for credentials off the site? (Website, business cards etc) Even if someone does that and goes about it in a way @SecretProvider mentioned, that new burner number can still end up on the list.

Maybe, maybe not. For better or worse. I have heard the stories about $500+/hr quotes etc. Nowadays, it’s not the same as before where desperate guys were getting into the industry: people are coming on as “content creator/social media influencer” exclusives, looking to tap into the allure of rich overnight come ups. Failing to realize, lots of the average guys looking for m4m are cheap as fuck and really don’t want to pay: I even had an aspiring friend send me a video of a guy on insta, claiming to have made like $1,000 just for going to a guy’s hotel and cursing him out for a few minutes. And newcomers actually THINK; that’s how you “make it” in the biz 🤦🏽‍♂️ Lot of people trying to be tik tok and insta sex workers, unfortunately all it’s doing is making it more mainstream and less appealing to clients. It’s not necessarily good news by any means. Especially in a country that hasn’t made the progress to define it as a legitimate enterprise.

Companion here but, first step is to acknowledge and recognize individual escort boundaries and things they may have to contend with. Versus dismissing them as unimportant or placing all the blame on the sex worker. Be open to different perspectives, don’t lump everyone into the same category, and don’t expect all escorts to be willing to take the same level of risk. Accept others experiences as valid, and have an open mind to change. Don’t be crabby, clownish, or condescending when communicating with escorts. If you want our services, check the profiles and be willing to follow directions. All basic stuff but, all ways to prevent a situation from becoming mismanaged.

Hmm, idk about that one. It shouldn’t be just 1 side trying as hard. Both have to do the work, even if one is getting paid. In my experience, clients who feel that way: often do the same old setup and don’t try to switch things up themselves. Like there’s some, who only want to meet at their place. That’s fine if that’s the arrangement, but sometimes the same setting gets stale. A hotel or trusted 3rd party might be a good move to keep things fun.

It’s important to recognize that. And the industry is very location dependent right now. Some cities just aren’t producing many in person meets at all. Either they are too filled with other rent guys, or the city doesn’t have enough “gay” money (like I said, some cities claim growth, but the growth in gay wealth is invisible or non existent). I’m grateful I’m not just starting out, and have select regulars I can stay in touch with.

Just noticing this, but I concur. That’s basically what I’ve been working to do. Sometimes it doesn’t always work though as it can take awhile for someone to notice in the smaller towns. Whereas the bigger cities often always have people looking. But problem is, there’s just SO many guys to look thru. I’m not a client though so, I can’t say what’s too much versus not enough to look thru. When I look at California, towns in Florida, the northeast: the pages of ads just keep scrolling as more and more guys show up on the list. It’s way more than it was 15 years ago. What happened, did more guys grow up and become open to being MSM sex workers over the last 20 years??? Or is something else going on 🤔 That said, I did help someone direct to RentMen on an alternative platform recently. Its anonymous but he basically said:

That’s true, to an extent. Unfortunately in a country that continues to stigmatize and not decriminalize sex work, and a large swath of LGBT community being anti-pay for sex (many guys put this in their profiles): being business savvy isn’t necessarily a free pass to success. I post lots of pics on RentMen, have tons of reviews, everything that seems to be successful. But my region is cheap guys who don’t want to pay, and if they do pay: they expect $150-200. At $300/$400 most these guys come around very seldom. Some guys will say even $150 is too much. They want to pay $80. Not to knock someone’s ability to give, but I can’t wear myself out at $100 seeing 10 guys to get $1,000 (hypothetical scenario), and then be expected to provide cum and hard dick each time. And in regards to the guy with the new Porsche, you never know what people are doing or how they got what they have. I know people driving BMWs and Benz’s, but can’t afford to go to dinner. But they’ll go and make another guy spend their money on them instead. I’ve been a “victim” of such tactics myself. Once went on a date with a guy who drove an Audi TT, he ordered lobster and a couple drinks in addition to my meal. I wasn’t expecting to spend $160 on food that night, but fortunately it was a 1 time learning lesson about him and we ended up just being acquaintances because: how I look being someone’s sugar date, when I’m contending with trying to manage my own business lol.

I thought we were going to discuss bottoming dietary restrictions 🙊 Or maybe you need to prep your brats better

This is actual relevant info to the question posed. Also, RentMen though I appreciate them: doesn’t necessarily do us as much justice than sites like RentMasseur and even former sites like RentBoy/Men4Rent. Without rates, you almost don’t have a functional platform. If you have to answer “how much” 100 times a day, and only a couple book in a week: how many hypothetical messages do you answer? I’ve reminded RM in private a few times to consider allowing rates, because with no rates and no nude photos: It’s feeling like Grindr 2.0. And Grindr is taking over as the main place to meet in places under 1 million in population, but hardly anyone is paying or wants to pay a fair price on Grindr. Not to mention the extreme amount of time waste spent trying to use it for P4P. The auto reply feature is great for providing more info, but the problem is like you say: 99% just read the auto reply and then don’t do anything as instructed. It’s good to have some filter before the initial contact.

So when we talk about dates, I don’t particularly like that feature, but that’s the only way to be listed in a city outside of the 4 hour max distance that’s allowed. But I have always stated in my ad that travel dates are approximate. Despite the feature being available, putting dates is almost putting the cart before the horse. I put them up because that’s what I have to work with, but right now my current strategy is to only go to where I’m invited. Or sometimes I’ll just move my entire ad to a different state or city on and off with no dates. Also, even advertising dates in a city: I’m finding it’s not always getting enough exposure. I won’t show on the main page on RentMen.Eu but I will on Rent.Men. I don’t always know which version clients are using, but I find I get more hits when I directly move my ad to an area. So throughout the week, I’ll just post in other cities I plan to visit. And please don’t focus on a provider coming to you, hoping to get other work as being a burden. Trust me, I do that all the time and most times I end up booking other clients in cities surrounding it, even if it’s different than the one the client is in. That’s part of going to places by invite. For example, I have a client who invited me to 1 town, but over the course of the week I went to 5 cities all within 2-3 hours away, and it was a productive mix of more clients, a crush, and meeting with friends I met at a camp weekend last month. It was not a case of me going JUST for that one client, BUT: I needed to have some definitive purpose to go at all. I think some clients over think it, and try to think ahead of me. Stop 🛑 lol. Just plan the session, and confirm. Don’t try to figure out what I’m doing, or what other reasons I’m there for. What’s worse than going to a city for 1 client? Going to a city with NO clients, and then trying to scramble to find someone in a short period. That’s why I said, I’m not reliant on travel dates. It’s all about going where I’m invited. If someone can’t properly invite me, I’m just not going to bother going. The gay pay sex scene right now has become very strategic. Too many people pretend they want to meet, but then they go silent. I have rows of emails from clients in other cities, who never text me to confirm anything. Or they expect to handle everything via email where they take 5-6 hours to reply back to a message. It’s so annoying, when time moves fast and I have to make decisions about where I’m going to be, each day. I’m just not doing any unnecessary risk taking, and if I do there needs to be an anchor client who’s reliable to make it worth it. Otherwise I just won’t go.

Likewise cheers 🍻 Trust me I know, but you know what? So be it. As we’ve seen lately, it’s hard to get people to agree on things. BUT, I still feel when people can see a different perspective they can be open to change how they go about things. I’m not here to argue or fight because nobody here has done anything wrong specifically. However, it’s just a general conversation about people who utilize the RentMen platform. I don’t know why some people here want to resort to making it like it’s an attack on ALL clients (it’s not). It’s more so discouraging a way of trying to coordinate travel that’s not helpful for either side, not a particular person. There’s many cities on RentMen that have NO escorts listed. I’m in the Midwest, outside of Chicago and Minneapolis: there’s cities that may only have few to nobody. Some aren’t particularly small either, but they’re far out, have no gay bars, and just no real male sex work lifestyle at all. That’s why I say there has to be some sort of plans that I expect to have a client on schedule. That being said, I try to detail as much as I can in the 2,000 characters RentMen allows us. The problem is, people don’t seem to have much direction on how to book us. RentMen lets us throw out a bunch of cities, and show ourselves: yet guys really have no clue on what it means. People just have to accept, not every escort is going to be open to dash off to a city by default. I know some people have the advantage of either having a work conference, alternative travel career, or in my case: friends and family who live in the travel cities we advertise. Sometimes I still find myself going to cities, even with no clients pre-booked. I did that in Denver earlier this year, I did it in Detroit also. And Dallas. I just happened to know people there already. Sometimes it works out, many times it doesn’t. I just can’t operate on a maybe/maybe not schedule. Guys forget: when I go to a city I need a place to stay. That’s hotel money. It’s gas money. And I can’t rely on some vague RentMen and RentMasseur emails to be a deciding factor. People’s communication on the platforms aren’t that great, and sometimes it takes hours for people to reply back. Most travel cities I go now, I need 24-48 hours notice minimum. But I’m still advertising weeks in advance. If I happen to take on someone short notice, great. But it’s not a strategy I rely on.

Excuse me if this has been discussed already elsewhere but, it doesn’t seem the issue has been solved. So, I occasionally travel to Wichita Kansas area and was just there in a town outside of it. But this has been the few times I’ve noticed: There’s a plethora of hot guys all about 33 miles away, which is most likely in the Wichita area. Some of these guys, I’ve recognized personally from Twitter and who live in other states. But as I’m looking further, idk if A4A just happens to have a default server for the area or what. But it’s real weird how profiles keep surfacing. And Cheney Kansas is a small podunk town in middle of Kansas. It makes no sense, but it’s definitely making the A4A platform less profitable to where I’m not getting as many clients, hardly any because apparently these are all fake accounts. Notice how all these profiles are 25 miles away. Which is weird because even when I was there with GPS on, that’s what is showing near: Now here’s actual Wichita amount of guys (me in the towel lol): and here is Cheney Kansas stats:

I’m not at all ashamed. You should be ashamed for being a clown out of character. Who are you to question my credentials, are you paying my travel and hotel bills to criticize what I can or can’t do? Can you stand 10+ years in MY industry? And I’m not talking about being Ronald McDonald ✋🏾 Yes I have been in the biz awhile, and it’s because of that which is why I’m less inclined to take on unnecessary risks. Traveling to a city without anyone scheduled is one I don’t want to take. You talk about taking 2 hours to put on makeup? Well have you sat in a car for 4 hours traveling to a city, then booked a hotel and waited 12 hours for nobody to show up? And then been stuck with the cost of gas and hotel to get there and back? Also nobody is mocking client’s intelligence. You sound overly sensitive and prejudice. You don’t understand because you think the practice should be seamless and easy. But unless you’re actively in the industry yourself, you can’t really understand how things could be better than what it’s portrayed. Even today I had an example, and I’ll post it what I said on another website: It’s THAT type of stuff why I don’t travel without confirmed bookings. What I will do is, revolve my schedule around the clients who can be considerate and respect my time. Then I go about my business and schedule. I’m NOT going to be waiting around or driving around town to town aimlessly waiting for people to figure out what the hell they want to do. I have a life.

I’m glad you asked but: I’m not about to go down the rabbit hole of defending what I like or don’t like about the industry. It’s not so much about me not liking the job. It’s more to do with; a combination of RentMen’s approach of telling clients what our ability for travels are, versus what we are actually capable of doing. Which is likely all variable by the provider. It’s great that RentMen and other sites allow us to advertise 6-12 cities at a time, all of which I’m happy to visit. However, there isn’t a default promise that I’m just going physically be in those cities without real money being expected. Well like I said above: each provider may have differing methods for serving travel cities. I list travel cities because I can drive to them BUT: people have to be willing to coordinate properly. I actually had to explain to 2 potential clients recently: just because I have a city listed doesn’t mean I’m just going to show up there by default. Some of these cities “nearby” are up to 4 hours away. To do that on same day notice or without any real clients confirmed is not possible. Even when I’ve done that once or twice, after a few times of sitting in a hotel for a night or 2 with no clients: I eventually come to recognize there needs to someone waiting before I go there. I know that’s not possible in every city, but even last year I went out to Palm Springs for a night and a day on a Sunday as a “me” night, but also hoped someone would book. I spent $180 on a hotel but the few hours I had the hotel for, nobody ended up showing up. And nights like that, I end up going on hookup apps meeting someone to fuck for free, just to get money’s worth out of the hotel cost. However, that’s not necessarily an outcome I prefer to have. It’s almost a last ditch effort that I end up regretting because I spent money AND my cum. Which means even greater loss. I only like to do free hookups AFTER I get a paid client. And trust me: I can cum twice in a night 🤣 Ha, thanks. But I also have some advice for you via Cardi B 🤣 “Now let's talk about this hating ass bitch Ungrateful ass bitch Fake friend ass bitch, a clown ass bitch On the 'net, kick your friend while she down ass bitch” Jokes aside: my point is, if you’re going to give advice be genuine. You seem spiteful, why are you miffed with something I have to deal with? That’s not a good characteristic of a clown:

Lol, I suppose it’s true. The “how to get a woman to be attracted to you” franchise never goes out of business. And they’re also looking for the same. At least with gays, sex is the appetizer not the entree. Fuck first, date after🤪

This is why years ago, I converted to a tier level of pricing. It’s common with female providers to offer 15-30 minutes in addition to hourly. Or QVs (quick visits) prices. Although it’s not always the full rate, there’s been times where I’ve had to suck it up or be sucked up (pun intended) for something less than what I originally desired. And it’s not a matter of desperation; sometimes I just want to make use of the time I have available and if the guy can also meet at the same time, great. I have my tier options if they want something cheaper. I rather do even $200 every so often, than to be fucking for free on hookup apps like a good majority of the MSM community is expecting us to do. However, most times lately I don’t have to contend with too much haggling. I have a pretty ample photo gallery, which lets others know I’m going to stand by what I prefer to do. I just don’t like blatant price comparisons or being told “too expensive” or “too much”. Would it be too much, for YOU to meet and sleep with a guy you don’t know looks like, and maybe not your type? Bet they wouldn’t. Like one fairly lucky to be married to a “financially stable” guy I was chatting with at his home in Iowa. He’s like, yeah I would be an escort: for $100,000. Like okay…now I feel cheap even if I were asking $500/hr 😂

It’s not about covering the expense. You may be thinking of covering airfare or something similar. I’m not talking about that. I’m just saying in general: I need to know I have a client and a session that I know how much money in particular waiting when I get there. I’m not going to spend money and magically go to a city, hoping to meet someone. Also people say that shit all the time. “Hit me up when you’re in town”. Only for me to get there and they don’t answer texts, or they’re not available, or who knows. It’s not enough to go by. Even if I’m driving just an hour or 2 away, what am I supposed to do when I get there, just wait around for nobody? Makes no sense lol. Even tonight one of my favs texted me, asked when I’d be in his area. It’s 3 hours away. I said, I have no plans to be there: but if you want to make some, I’m available this weekend. We discussed availability and he sent deposit. Easy peasy. Non of that, “well when you get in the area here let me know”. Well I may not have a reason to go there. You say it doesn’t matter what our reason is, but I need a reason for someone. With no plans, I have no reason to go.

Right, but I don’t always have regulars in every town. Sometimes I’m just open to go to a particular area. Like for example; in California I don’t always want to just stay in LA the entire time. I may want to explore the other cities in the region, but I can’t just go for nothing. I have to go for someone. And I’ll say, it not necessarily 99% of the time: but probably 50% of the time, that I’ve went for 1 client and did end up having another appointment while in the area. But it was usually just coincidence and GPS proximity working in my favor. Yes, I say advance notice in all my ads. To many, that means the day before. Which isn’t exactly in advance. I also try to stick with the week or 2 in advance strategy, but it’s just not always realistic. Sometimes, I find myself having to advertise weeks and even MONTHS in advance. And unfortunately sometimes I have to postpone if there’s not enough firm bookings to go. That’s why many times I do try to go with an alternative purpose, so I can stick with the plans regardless. But I also can’t put finances and well being at risk, dashing off somewhere just because it sounds good; but then I don’t have a dollar in deposits received.

The thing is, it’s not so much that I’m asking them to pay for my travel there. Even if I had $1,000 in my pocket, I’m not particularly eager to dash off to a city and just “cruise” for sex all day long. I know some people do that, but that’s the hookup app culture. Therefore I need to have some sort of idea that I’m going to see at least 1 confirmed person beforehand. I may be traveling thru on my way to another city, and passing thru anyway. But I still need to know WHEN to pass thru and IF I need to plan accommodations. I can’t just show up there and immediately expect something to happen within 24 hours. For example, on my last “tour”, I went to 6 towns in the Midwest that were all within 3-4 hours of each other. All except 1 had clients booked prior to going. And guess which one I didn’t have any clients in? The one I was advertising in with no clients booked ahead. Fortunately it was a dual purpose trip, but if it wasn’t: I’d of wasted hotel money and 175 miles driving there. And also as you said: people may ask when I’m in town. But that means they are expecting me to have some alternative purpose to be there. But again, if the travel cities are giving 6 options up to 250 miles away: I’m not just going to each one for no reason. I need to have a reason to go, and oftentimes it’s for an appointment. Once I get there, then I can possibly include other appointments. But like I say, most times I have clients scheduled before I arrive.

This is in reference to the ones who don’t want to arrange a deposit or be willing to confirm a visit ahead of time. I usually have about 6 nearby travel cities. In case anyone doesn’t know, RentMen allows both nearby travel cities with no dates up to about 250 miles away. They also allow travel cities with dates for locations further away. I dislike it the most when someone references my nearby travel cities and says, “oh well just hit me up when you’re in town”. How does that even work? I’m supposed to just show up hoping you’ll be available at the same time I’m there? For all I know that may be a week away, the person may be out of town or not available at the same time anyway. Or they’ll say, “don’t just come all the way here just for me”. Who said I was? Just because I need a deposit and confirmation doesn’t always mean I have no other purpose for either A) being in that city or B) connecting that city to other places I may go next. I just need to make sure I’m not wasting hotel hours sitting around with nothing planned because 99% of the time, getting same day clients never happens when I have less than 24 hours to use a hotel. Also, usually when I go to a city: I’m not spending more than 1 or 2 nights max in a hotel at a time nowadays. I have designed my schedule and travels to where I am never just hanging around in a hotel, wasting money with nobody scheduled. Most times I’m already booked BEFORE arriving to a city, so I may not have time to schedule anyone else. It’s just best to take the direction of what the provider is suggesting when booking, versus trying to finagle around it or make up assumptions about how every provider should operate.

Wow, 3 blocked numbers? I had more like 30 lol. Then again, lot of it was before I switched my phone off being public on RentMen. But I can recall my texts convos so if anyone happens to reach out from them, I’ll mention previous efforts to book. Also Central America (not the Caribbean but the USA) isn’t exactly the most tolerant place. I’ve noticed though RentMen use seems to have dropped off a lot ever since the platform changed nudes to signed up only. I understand their reasoning for doing so (especially with un signed people visiting the site and being indiscreet about sharing photos). However it’s just different now. Plus many of the MSMs have been using the apps. So I haven’t seen an increase in bookings every year, except getting new clients and regulars on tours.

A question mainly for other escorts but, I feel this probably applies to smaller/medium sized markets the most. Or it can apply to anyone with non mainstream look, in a overly competitive market etc. One thing I find is, even though some areas may be experiencing “growth or boom”, it doesn’t always correlate to new clients. I’ve seen certain areas grow, but yet online and even on the apps: it’s the same 3-4 guys month after month, year after year. New people moving in may not be M4M oriented and if they are, they might not be trying to pay. I’m experiencing this in my home state. I’ve been “doing” the area for like 5-6 years, but each year gets a little slower. I just had the whole Thanksgiving Holiday with no appointments, after returning from being away for a week. Unfortunately that might also correlate to the fact I’ve had so many people on my “blocked” list on iMessages. I’ve cleared it out a bit as I try to be open to “2nd chances”. Which may or may not be a great move, but some will come around months later and still be unwilling to abide by the requirements I have outlined in my ad and website to book. So some end up blocked more than once. Usually, I feel after 3-5 years there would be regulars can be built up. But I’m finding regulars in many areas tend to come and go. They may be a regular for 1st, 2nd or 3rd time. Or the visits may be too spread out to really count on. Or as I’ve also seen: they start to want to pay less for the same amount of service, or expect to disappear for 3 years and come back to me charging the same price I did then. That’s why if I’m not seeing a steady stream of clients in a particular place, I feel it’s not worth staying.

You’d think it’s simple right? Issue is most seem to only be available 1 day, and on the same day of contact. I’ll also add to that, along with the question below: I wanted to circle back to you, since you seem to think it’s something to laugh at. But it’s a real issue. I can’t count how many times I’ve had potential appointments fall thru, because it was a last minute or same day inquiry from someone contacting my ad. Then they had no time to allow something to happen. Usually it’ll be something like, “Hi I seen your ad, are you available TODAY”. Usually they mean in a hour or 2. They didn’t really check with me ahead of time, and often by the time they’ve reached out: I’m not in a position to meet for intimacy with a new person, at necessarily when they may be looking for it. And it’s not even always down to distance. I remember earlier this summer, I had a client contact me same day. He was going to be a few blocks from me in downtown. Problem is, 2 days ago I had already made plans with a very attractive guy younger than me. The client was already delayed by hours between his initial and 2nd reply back: And by that time, I was still committing with the plans I had. The client finally replied and wanted to meet VERY CLOSE to the time I was scheduled to meet my date. I didn’t want to bail on my plans, because the date already arranged for a hotel for us as well (it was one of those, let’s get away to the city type of things). I tried to schedule the client for the next day but then it’s, “I can’t because me and my partner are driving our RV to Michigan first thing in the morning and etc etc. So I can only meet today.” Mind you…this was in a city I had advertised in days and weeks ahead before arriving. I ended up sticking to the plans with my date, and missing the appointment. It seemed like a great decision, but then the 1st date was just a 1 night situation that didn’t turn into a 2nd date. And I turned down $400 over that shit. So I really kinda wish I had just seen the client instead. But that’s the dilemma with booking last minute, and having limited time to do so. I end up having to pick what I think is right, versus what I actually need. And money is what I really needed in that point in time, because I was already low on clients that trip. However the 2nd time that happened with someone else, I delayed plans with friends and took the client instead. What makes it so complicated is: I often run my RentMen ads well ahead of going to a city, as I can’t just show up with nothing booked. I strive to get at least one or 2 in advance, but then I still end up getting mostly same day requests once I’m there. And depending on what I have going on, I may or may not be able to take them on short notice. I know some people think things should operate akin to a hookup app or bath house where it’s instant availability: but what we’re doing is very different. Having a phone number up, often means being contacted when I may not be actively looking at the same time someone else is. Even though I can make myself available, I can’t only make it happen when the other person (client) is willing to make the time for it. But if they’re so busy and just trying to “catch me”, it’s not going to work as well. Also it seems many clients travel, and travel A LOT. However, I know many people in my personal life who don’t travel at all. They’re usually more available. Although it’s nice to have the luxury to travel, it’s going to make it harder to schedule if nothing is planned in advance. I hate when someone hits me up, and then is like: “oh I can’t do tomorrow, I’m going out of town”. I remember some years ago I said something similar at an auto shop in Orlando. I needed an alignment or something. The guy couldn’t book me until the next day, but I wanted to get going the next day. He says, “well if you go down the street: there’s 10 other auto places you can try. See if they’re available today” 😂 That kinda made me realize, if you’re trying to get something done, don’t expect it the same day from the first time you contact someone. And if do, don’t make the other person feel they’re at a loss because they can’t see you right away. I just feel especially with escorts, guys don’t seem to care to give enough room to plan.

Trust me, average guys are putting themselves out there, for all the world to see. It’s just they post more on other gay sex platforms, than in the RM world. But there’s still a large culture in the “community” that sex is something to do when bored and horny. So many cities out there may have few to no “Rentmen” advertising, but a lot is going on behind the scenes.

Exactly 👍🏾 All of that being understood, yet it doesn’t necessarily get easier. I try to be understanding and forgiving to an extent, but some out there…it’s like if they expect respect, it needs to be reciprocal. I especially dislike the ones who try to compare me to other providers: most of whom I don’t know, never worked with and probably will never meet. Good insight 😆 I would probably have to be in a demi-sexual/pansexual situation if I were to consider that. But like you, I’m just regular gay and can’t quite see that happening yet. Like a hookup app profile I seen the other day, “I’m not into trans. Y’all are beautiful but not my preference” lol