JB_Studio38

As someone who lives in the Midwest: I feel Chicago is expensive; compared to Omaha, Tulsa, Wisconsin. When I drive thru Illinois: the tolls, traffic, needing to be closer to the city etc. all adds up. Even St. Louis, which for awhile seemed like a “cheaper” city, they’ve been modeling Chicago in prices for like going out to eat, housing and hotel stays etc in certain areas and the hotels in town run more than towns like Dallas/Houston. I think overall: shit has become more expensive when it comes down to rent, going out etc. A single or coupled gay man probably isn’t as affected as a big family is: but in some areas, they’re still being cheap about spending, disparage guys who charge or ask for “gas money”. I’m grateful for the many clients who do see me: but across the board it’s been REAL slow in certain areas. RentMasseur isn’t as busy, RentMen has tons of views but few actual bookings. The small towns hardly have any providers, yet the bigger cities are jam packed with guys. There’s a big discrepancy and it’s translating to: it’s not hitting as much in the smaller towns. But the bigger cities have become so full with guys it’s hard to get noticed. I sometimes scroll thru, and the page reloads 4-5 times with more and more guys. If I were a client, I wouldn’t know who to pick lol. MEANWHILE: sites like the one below (I am NOT condoning anyone here use it for M4M services but it’s just for reference) have only a few select men in each city, and their rates are way more than what is usually offered on the RM sites. Home | Cowboys4Angels COWBOYS4ANGELS.COM

I’m sure you were…

If you want something deep inside, I’ve got something for that. And you don’t have to worry about how hard it is, it’ll be a replica 😹 That said, you’re incorrect about me being hurt ego about donating. Nice try but, you conveniently ignored the part I actually quoted. You made a whole new paragraph that diverted from your initial point saying: And no providers arent disfrenchised ppl, many of them make much more than your average joes. Even if they didnt, they still arent disfrenchised in any way That’s when I asked provide factual data if you believe that’s true statement. I can easily provide one from another website where a provider is discussing their struggles: “This month I took off bc I was sick for weeks after my birthday but prior to that, I actually lost money in November, bc I saw 1 client & it didn't even cover ad costs” Just because you may not be disenfranchised, speaking from a position of privilege, doesn’t assume everyone is. All it takes is a car breakdown/accident, surprise medical emergency etc and a few missed bookings to end up in struggle mode. I’ve gone to cities myself, and had medical issues while traveling, car trouble etc while there. Combine it with missing appointments due to that, flaky guys who think we don’t need the money, and just fucking off for the hell of it: it’s easy to end up disenfranchised even temporarily. You shouldn’t come making claims about folks that you don’t know their circumstances. That’s a good point you make but, you’re speaking anecdotally. I would think most non-substance using men can somewhat gauge how many times they can stay hard/get off. I don’t need someone to think, “Hmm should I call him, maybe he’s had 5 clients today already and can’t get hard”. It’s not about whether or not they all book, it’s more about can I at-least have the opportunity to CHOOSE. I have performed back to back many times, getting hard or cumming each time. Sometimes same person, other times different person. It’s not been an issue because at 38 years old, I kinda am more in tune with my body and my other parts. I rather have the say in whether or not I can take on a booking, versus someone deciding he’s going to follow thru…and having to figure out a way to efficiently handle a hard on, when there’s no privacy at your residence to use a right hand man 😬

I try to separate from the “right now” brigade, and revolve mostly around pre-booking visits. However, I have occasionally suggested RM to exchange “available now” to available today. Even if I’m 2 blocks away, it still takes time to communicate, screen and get ready to accommodate a paying suitors requests. And for me, that’s usually been anywhere from 4 to 48+ hours notice. My only thing with exchanging a few emails: I have heard some reach out to multiple providers at once. Which of the 10 guys you exchanged 10 emails back and forth, gets the carrot 🥕? That may be why some try to meet right away. Also, not everybody wants to do the back and forth email exchanges. I think more RMs would be open to do so if there was a paid incentive (one that can be used to cover ad costs and platinum boosts, etc per email inquiry session: like $10/$20). Regardless, you are doing the right thing by not rushing to “meet now”. But you may want to say initially that you want to consider reserving time in advance, with a reasonable suggestion of when.

Cute, but just for the record I want to just say: it’s not only potential clients making these type of approaches. I’d even go as far to say, it’s really not even actual clients at all doing these things. It’s a general “guys browsing for the potential of having sex with another guy” that is the bigger issue. Last week I had 2 other guys fake like they wanted to meet, they were not clients. One is a guy I’ve “dated” this year, another was an app guy who happened to be visiting my area. I’m not too upset with the app guy not meeting (even though we exchanged pics, and he talked about meeting only to say, “it’s my moms birthday today, idk if I can meet”. Well if you don’t know if you can’t meet, get off the app browsing for free nudes). I am however not fucking with the other guy, because for the 2nd time he’s come near my area where his family lives (he lives in Dallas and I’ve visited him there 3 times in between going for client visits). He asked if I would be available for Thanksgiving. He couldn’t find the time. Apologized and said he can definitely meet Christmas week. Christmas week comes around, couldn’t find the time to be available: a month later: So I’ve made 3 trips to your area but you can’t make any time for me? And this was supposed to have been someone I was pursuing a real relationship with. I know you think it’s funny to make light of someone’s dealings, but I feel bad for the clients I know who are going thru divorces right now, some being made to pay spousal support. All because they probably were in a position to support someone’s shitty behavior. If I had more money, and more ability to host/travel at the last minute: I’d have a lot more people using me for CONVENIENCE. And I’ve seen that so many times in life, people who were only there temporarily when it was convenient for them. I still feel I give way more opportunity to people who don’t deserve it, but when they come with the bullshit more than once, in more ways than one: I’m letting them know it’s not cool, and most likely they’ll take their own trash 🚮 selves out.

I agree. This isn’t directed at you but in a different subject: I don’t know how the “riot act” can be compared to me asking a client to text me, and giving a factual short explanation for why I request that: There was nothing in my message: …that was remotely close to giving this client any “stern warning”. I simply told him I need a text for same day/next day appointments. The city where most of the clients who contact RentMasseur and RentMen, is an hour away from me minimum. The airport adds an extra 30 minutes usually. I’m not always in the city 24/7 like they think. So I must get these people to respond in a timely manner, and often times if I don’t get a confirmed booking and/or deposit earlier in the day like before it gets dark: I have to then be prepared to stay up late and commute at a time of night that I may not wish to do. That’s why something like that, I can’t just BS around on an email trying to figure out. So I’m rightfully angry about it, and trust me that email I sent back wasn’t even close to angry. I met 1 guy last week who was visiting, but he TEXTED first thing in morning and sent address and deposit by afternoon. I seen him that evening. Something like that is doable because I have time to formulate my day and commute. Sending a faint email asking if I’m around, when I have to commute that distance into a city, is grating. I also had another inquiry text me the other day for a same day booking: but when I told him where I could host, he says “that’s too far”. Well then how the hell would you be trying to meet “now” when you don’t even know where F I am to begin with 🤦🏽‍♂️ People here can pretend this stuff doesn’t exist, but it needs to be discussed. The behavior out here by many is just unacceptable. I emailed RentMasseur as well today, seeing what they suggest also. RentMen and RentMasseur are bringing more Timewasters than Adam4Adam used to.

Appreciate the desire to understand however, it’s not asking to jump thru hoops. If anything, it’s helping to simplify the process. If they can at least show they are willing to assist in doing that, it’s off to the right start. I have stated in auto reply before, that I don’t always have ability to check emails right away. I simply am not inclined to interrupt my day, multiple times a day: to check on every email message that comes thru. Even If I didn’t have auto response, I would type up the same auto template and send it. Same thing I do for text. If I didn’t have auto response, emails would go unread for a lot longer because I don’t really notice every notification that comes thru. The auto reply is also filter. Is this going to be a client who’s going to expect me to meet last minute, with bare minimum info who could possibly flake on my way to him, or not show up when he says he is: or this someone who has shown to be transparent and can be a bit trustworthy? I’m not going to drag it out. I already have to travel/host. Write Ads/pay for Ads. Then perform. If I can simplify the initial contact stage, I reserve the right to do so.

Absolutely. Also, part of why I didn’t particularly feel inclined to do a same night appointment is because my area has been experiencing some bad night time fog. I had to drive thru it 2 different nights last week. And I don’t live in the main metro area, so I have to factor that in my commute. When I messaged him, I wasn’t even looking for a same day booking. It was just me sending a follow up to see when he was looking to meet the “24th-28th” he was in town. Why give me those dates, without actually saying what day he want to meet ❓ If that person was in town the dates he say he was, he had to have known the weather. Without me knowing whether he wanted to host or travel, that would determine whether I was “around” or not. So I couldn’t even say yes or no to it, that’s why I directed to text. Well you’ve seen my auto reply. Nothing in it is onlyfans related. The reason why I do auto reply, is because far too many time I will get an email that’s very vague. Here’s an example from my RM email list: Look at all those emails! Some will ask my rate and it’s listed. And yes they are different dates but, if you asking to remove auto reply: you’re also asking me to go thru and have a conversation with all those emails, and I’ve shown how some people wait hours or days between responses. People want to use the email platform like it’s a text app or hookup platform. But the responses don’t come thru at the same speed. I need to have people off the email, so we can pay attention and actually set something up in a timely manner. If auto reply wasn’t an option, I would 100% disable contact by email (which is an option on both Rent sites). The auto reply is the only reason I keep it, because I’ve already had to close texts to non signed in clients. Far too many spam texts when leaving number public, and far too many people texting who haven’t read a thing in my ad.

Okay at this point, you’re sounding like a bitter bitch yourself lol. Listen, it doesn’t matter how you sugarcoat it. You’re trying to water it down and make it sound all innocent: but what you don’t know is there were atleast 3 others (see the example) who did something similar. Are you aware that many escorts don’t do same day appointments? You talking about me making money, bruh: what money is there in that carrot dangling email response? I already gave you several examples: there was absolutely no relative info to make me feel this person actually even had any money. He didn’t talk about money. He didn’t talk about rate or price. What money did you see? No matter how you try to say it, in whatever raggedy ass tone you think is acceptable: asking a masseur “you around tonight” 2 days after sending an initial email and then ignoring all instructions: is not a confident sign that person is worth me dropping my plans and dashing out to see.

If this person wanted my time on a holiday or ANY day: he should have made the effort to do that days ago, when my reply went to him. You claim it sounds crazy, but you wouldn’t want someone to do that to you. You’d feel the same way. Does that sound like a person who’s “thirsty” for me? He’s lucky I even replied at all because many times I don’t say anything more after that auto reply goes out. Either they follow the directions, or I’m out.

The principle 🛫 just flew over you. It’s not about being or not being available for bookings. Yes, sometimes I am available on those days and don’t mind. That’s not the desperate part. It’s the other stuff behind it. Again: dude left me on read for 2 days. Never included a photo. Never included what hotel he was. Or area of town. Or if he wanted to host or come to me. Never included what he was looking for. Never included any mention of viewing my site. Never included how long of a visit he wanted. Never even bothered to text, as politely as I instructed. But somehow, I should be available to this Mr. Nobody on Christmas night, because if I “am around”, I might as well right? Yes I’m taking this one email personally: but people on the RM sites do this often, and it’s inconsiderate. Just plain inconsiderate. It’s not Grindr. And I hate that app too, because it’s the epitome of a cesspool for timewasting ass dudes who just want jerk off material and free attention, knowing damn well they are not intent to actually make something happen. And RentMen and RentMasseur have almost become the same fucking thing. But it’s not a game, this is someone’s paycheck.

What factual information and chart do you have, to back this statement up? Are you saying there aren’t homeless providers who don’t care for children, or that may not have cancer? Although I live a relatively comfortable life, finances are still an issue: namely due to the fact that if everyone who contacted me actually did what they’re supposed to do: I would be making more than average Joes. But since a large percentage of them don’t follow thru: I’m sometimes left with a lot less than projected. And just add up a missing $400 here, $300 there. Over the course of year. Even at one flake a week, that’s over $15,000 NOT GAINED. And it’s definitely more than one a week.

I appreciate the empathy, however definitely read the address I made to @nate_sf in that regard. It was not an innocent asking if I’m around tonight. Dude took 2 days to even respond back, and he Christmas treed (pun intended lol) over my client introduction form: and went straight to asking if I’m around tonight. On Christmas night 🤦🏽‍♂️ It’s like first of all: How I look taking a same day appointment on Christmas from someone who already took 2 days to get back to me? What kind of low self esteem, no life, thirsty person would I be to accept such a low effort invite? It’s fucking horrible. And he’s not the only one, I’ve already blacklisted 2 other clients this week too. This why I really don’t like to work around the holidays unless it’s with regulars, or someone new like the other day: who can send a deposit within moments of contacting to show they are serious without arguing with me about it. The toxicity of some of the inquiries that come thru, can really sour my mood.

No: this sounds like someone, who has given so much to the RentMen/Masseur industry…time, money, energy: only to get people who don’t appreciate my effort. I have email after email after email on RentMasseur and RentMen from people who never end up giving any money. I’m polite, give ample info about myself and services, and yet can hardly get a full sentence from some people. Yet, I’m supposed to be ready and available for them at all times. I think you need to not be condescending and try to cast shame: and see where things can improve. And it can start with you. Don’t come on here talking in a cocky tone, and trying to make like I’m just making up these things out of spite. Granted: I also admit I’m coming from a place of disadvantage: There are some cities out there, that are shitty markets. I used to think Indianapolis was the worse city to work in, until I based in Kansas City…which I already knew was bad from previous visits. Sure there are good clients in every major metropolitan city, and I’ve met them. But certain cities: they make me work so much, for so little. What I really am about to do and actually did before; is to STOP 🛑 all emails on RentMasseur and RentMen and just require text. It’s just becoming a waste of time. I like the auto reply feature, but not enough people bother to abide by it. And I don’t have the time and attention span to check emails every hour on the hour, nor do those email replies get sent to my phone except the RentMen app.

I understand what the 2 of you are saying, however you have to also understand that without any rules or directions: my phone line would be going absolutely berserk with every inquiry, non of which I could actually take. People will hit me up expecting me to host Host in 20 minutes or NOW. How do you know there’s privacy at the place I’m hosting, at the moment you text and ask me? How would that client feel if I just asked to come to his place announced? Some fail to provide any real detail about themselves to let me know we’re a match. I hear many stories from clients about bad experiences with escorts. But I have to sometimes wonder how quickly they ran out to meet that person, without actually making compatibility checks. Even if I say to a client, “yes I’m available NOW, come over my address is XXX”. How can that client know that I’m comfortable with HIM when he shows up? Y’all complain about escorts not getting hard, did you actual check to make sure the escort can perform for YOUR particular type? I ask every client nowadays, tell me something about yourself. It’s not to judge or be picky, it’s to ensure I know I can deliver. If they aren’t someone I feel I can get down with, I rather not take the money in exchange for a shitty experience.

I have to respectfully disagree with you though. Maybe you misunderstood. The issue is: I asked him, are you looking to host or come to me. That’s important, wouldn’t you think? Also in my auto reply I say: (Auto Reply) Hey, I'm J. To reach me for a same/next day booking, please text me @ (xxx) xxx-xxxx and include: - Name/Profile Host or Travel City Wanted - For more details or to advance plan your visit, view my website www. Now if I may remind you: he did not answer a single question or follow a single direction I asked. He simply said dates he would be in town, but I still had no idea who this guy was, where in town, what he’s looking for, what time, NADA. And this is email. Also, I know some clients have this idea that we may be right next door to them and don’t mind twiddling thumbs. But I very often set my ad in the main city, where I can host and travel. However, I’m not always in that part of town waiting around for clients. And notice how many hours passed? I’ll take it a step further and show you the exchange. You can see he responded back 2 days later after reading the message, then is taking forever and a day and all I get is a sloppy message about if I’m around? Around where? And continues… I was professional and thorough, he was not. I’m already answering on Christmas evening, so that alone is more than enough courtesy already. If someone wants an appointment, they need to be willing to do their part in following directions and not trying to be obscure. Ignoring messages and expecting me to keep the same tone, is not going to happen. Once it gets past a certain time at night, I may no longer be open to do same day appointments. It’s not that I’m calling clients idiots. I would never. Real clients help me to keep the profession afloat and do the right things to ensure a fun and safe experience. It’s the ones who PRETEND they are clients, but don’t actually do the things that real clients do. Case in point, from someone else who contacted me:

You can post a personal website link, but idk about the 3rd party Twitter links

And the other thing: stop asking “are you in (insert city). Didn’t you just see my ad in the city you’re asking about? If I wasn’t there, I wouldn’t be posting there. If you are wanting to know if or when I’m there: you should volunteer that you too are in the area and want to meet there. It’s almost like they second guess the idea that a person of color who’s a RentMan, could be in the town they are in 🤦🏽‍♂️ idk how some people lack basic introduction skills, but yet expect me to feel like we’re supposed to be a match in the same room together.

Going to jump right into it: What the fuck is up with people? I asked a question and you pose another question completely different than I asked. Then it’s vague sentence, hours later. I have specific instructions all throughout my ad. One is, don’t email if looking for a same day appointment. Respond to the auto reply with the questions asked, directly to the number listed. I know the holidays tend to bring out the idiots in the business when it comes to inquiries, but some of these guys aren’t even trying to make anything happen. Like, why are you bothering me with bullshit? If you not going to book, get the fuck off of the site. It’s really ridiculous. You can’t actually be looking to meet if you’re doing the bare minimum. Then I reply, and they don’t reply back 🤦🏽‍♂️ And the other thing: why so many contact the day before they are planning to go to a different city? I post my ads in advance before going anywhere. Some will hit me up expecting a same day visit, yet if something comes up where the text or email isn’t received the same night: it ends up being a case of, “I’m not in town anymore or, I’m leaving town now”. Some of them have hit me up more than once. It’s like bruh, if you KNOW that I come thru the area, why not just send a message ahead of time. You know my ad is running everyday for the past fucking 365 days a year, why not ask when I may be in the area or you want to meet when I’m in the area. I’m grateful for the good clients who follow directions and don’t give the run around, but too many out there make the process so much harder.

+ 💯 to that. And not just that. A client may have 1 or 2 bad experiences to talk about, whereas an escort may have 1 or 2 PER WEEK or DAILY in less serious ways, over texts. Even when it comes to deposits, for example earlier this week I was set to meet with someone in a different city where I knew some folks. Well a potential client wanted to meet, but claimed “had a bad experience” sending deposit. No elaboration of course (for now on, I’m going to start telling clients: Please write me a FULL DESCRIPTION of the incident you had (and how recent) which you sent a deposit and had something bad happen, and then I’ll see if that has anything to do with me. If not, I’ll explain IN FULL why it doesn’t 🤣 ) Well sure enough, he played around with meeting by not giving me the address. I told him I was coming from a different city, so I needed the address. Doesn’t send it. Minutes go by between responses, meanwhile time is ticking because if I’m going to arrive on time, I need to know where I’m going. Gets back to me and is iffy about my arrival time, but I’m like dude: I need the address so I can see exactly how long it’ll take. Next thing I know, I get a text saying he’s feeling sick. Okay, you could have fucking said that way earlier instead of wasting half my Sunday afternoon getting packed from the city I was already visiting. Luckily my gut and experience didn’t actually head that way, and when he failed to reply after over an hour when I asked for address: I didn’t even bother. And this was a booking discussed a week prior. I could have been getting a great long workout in that day, instead of getting ready for a trip that I didn’t even take. Then I had to tell my friends I wouldn’t be coming because, I needed TWO reasons to go. Same thing I’ve said in another post. I’m rarely ever going to a place JUST for one client (like some will say). But if I can find 2 reasons to go, I will. I just don’t like when they play around and don’t follow thru, then I have to cancel on others. And once again that’s another reason why I don’t meet anyone new, without a deposit. And even if previously met, it’s rarely an exception either.

So when you say you cancelled: At what point in the conversation was it? There are many traveling masseurs: are you reading reviews and checking for credentials off the site? (Website, business cards etc) Even if someone does that and goes about it in a way @SecretProvider mentioned, that new burner number can still end up on the list.

Maybe, maybe not. For better or worse. I have heard the stories about $500+/hr quotes etc. Nowadays, it’s not the same as before where desperate guys were getting into the industry: people are coming on as “content creator/social media influencer” exclusives, looking to tap into the allure of rich overnight come ups. Failing to realize, lots of the average guys looking for m4m are cheap as fuck and really don’t want to pay: I even had an aspiring friend send me a video of a guy on insta, claiming to have made like $1,000 just for going to a guy’s hotel and cursing him out for a few minutes. And newcomers actually THINK; that’s how you “make it” in the biz 🤦🏽‍♂️ Lot of people trying to be tik tok and insta sex workers, unfortunately all it’s doing is making it more mainstream and less appealing to clients. It’s not necessarily good news by any means. Especially in a country that hasn’t made the progress to define it as a legitimate enterprise.

Companion here but, first step is to acknowledge and recognize individual escort boundaries and things they may have to contend with. Versus dismissing them as unimportant or placing all the blame on the sex worker. Be open to different perspectives, don’t lump everyone into the same category, and don’t expect all escorts to be willing to take the same level of risk. Accept others experiences as valid, and have an open mind to change. Don’t be crabby, clownish, or condescending when communicating with escorts. If you want our services, check the profiles and be willing to follow directions. All basic stuff but, all ways to prevent a situation from becoming mismanaged.

Hmm, idk about that one. It shouldn’t be just 1 side trying as hard. Both have to do the work, even if one is getting paid. In my experience, clients who feel that way: often do the same old setup and don’t try to switch things up themselves. Like there’s some, who only want to meet at their place. That’s fine if that’s the arrangement, but sometimes the same setting gets stale. A hotel or trusted 3rd party might be a good move to keep things fun.

It’s important to recognize that. And the industry is very location dependent right now. Some cities just aren’t producing many in person meets at all. Either they are too filled with other rent guys, or the city doesn’t have enough “gay” money (like I said, some cities claim growth, but the growth in gay wealth is invisible or non existent). I’m grateful I’m not just starting out, and have select regulars I can stay in touch with.