JB_Studio38

At the end of the day, I try to encourage gays to explore other cities beyond just the LA, Houston, Miami, New York, Chicago, etc. places. Many of the big cities are just so ran thru. There’s 50 states, 48 contiguous. Although it’s not always the best nightlife/party options: some areas can still offer access to fun and everything else the bigger markets offer, but with less cost and competition. Montana and North/South Dakota maybe someday be the next Texas. They’ve got the size, but they don’t attract much in the way of gay or tourism. The weather obviously is a factor though. That said, I just recently met someone from Austin in a different state, and he was cool. I might have to visit again sometime.

I can see that. I’ve done a similar circuit back when I lived in the area. It’s not always as profitable as it seems unless can book longer sessions or overnights. Lot people/companies moving to Texas but it’s not the best kept secret it once was pre-2010s. It’s become the “new Florida/California” but it’s nothing like the 2. On a street level it might but the topography just doesn’t compare But…

Good idea about Mister Bnb. I have heard of it before but hadn’t yet used it. Sometimes though, I find hotels have their place because I may tend to change locations every day or 2. In Florida, I was “basing” in Orlando, but it was mostly nothing going on there with bookings other than my main regular. But it’s in the center of everything in central Florida so, it served its place. I know you mentioned Florida, Texas and California: which all are states with big metros, but the problem is all those places are highly competitive. Plus the “scams” have run those markets into obsoletion. While I was in Florida, I went out of my way to avoid most of the 4 main metros unless I had an invitation. I even spent last weekend in a fairly off the beaten path retirement community. I just don’t care for working the big cities as much anymore. I’ll go if I have an anchor or friends there, but they just aren’t as profitable because it’s so many guys trying to do the same thing in the big cities.. However I do understand much of the “in” crowd are based in the larger cities so I still leave myself open to visit them. But not all of them are suitable places for me to base. I was considering moving “back” to Dallas area last year, but after a couple trips of having 0 appointments, I decided I didn’t want to keep pushing with trying to squeeze money out of a turnip 🫜 , especially in a state that has penalized the P word I thought about trying out LA or San Diego for a year, but again: those are cities have an endless rotation. May be good to live in, but trying to visit for even a few days may not give enough time for a successful venture. Vegas reminds me of Orlando and the whole Disney theme, for adults. Which isn’t a bad thing but, I find they tend to have similar tendencies. Driving in/out of Vegas can feel like an island of its own though.

And to add another thing I’ve forgot to mention: although this doesn’t happen as often since I tend to book with advance notice only these days: Some guys who reach out to book when coming to their city, will do so but have an unreasonably narrow window of time to meet. Spending time to commute takes up time to get ready. And traffic is a big delay ever since the rebound from Covid. I ended up an hour and half late to an appointment few weeks ago due to traffic backed up for miles on my way. My regular was mad at me, but he is also chronically busy/short on time and only allotted a small window to see me, despite us planning days in advance, and knowing I was traveling from 150 miles away. Which I found kinda inconsiderate. If I’m extending my time to travel out of the way to their city and make it convenient, at least be willing to be patient. He tried to short me $100 because he could only stay for 40 minutes, I was like no sir. I have all evening and the next day to be available. I shouldn’t be penalized because you’re limited on time, especially when I was already 700 miles from my home base. Also some have mentioned traveling with another companion to split expenses. However though it sounds like a idea: I can’t see that happening for me unless I were commuting different vehicles and maybe even booking separate rooms. Which in that case, would completely defeat the purpose. I tried that with a friend a couple months ago: he booked a hotel room and told me he would be hooking up with someone for an hour. It turned into 2-3 hours. I almost thought he got murdered in the room because he wasn’t answering his phone either. The idea of having to leave the room, while my travel companion gets their freak on, is a no for me 👎🏾 I’ve tried it other times, and it rarely works for me unless it’s non escort friends and even then: it usually becomes outcalls only while me and friends share hotel/air bnb. Which might mean 50% less opportunity.

**This isn’t a question or advice. Just discussing the oft sought after strategy of traveling ** I’ve been experience with touring for a while now. Over a decade to be precise. The “escort definition” of touring is: Spending a week or 2 or even WEEKS/MONTHS going between a predetermined hub of cities, staying anywhere from 2-5 days at a time, before going onto the next destination, and covering ground to hit several areas. I know many up and coming escorts out there often highly interested in the traveling lifestyle. And I do feel it’s become ingrained in the American escort culture to advertise in and travel to different cities. Yes it can be lucrative and help to get exposure that may be hard to do staying in the same city. However, there’s a side to it that can become monotonous. For one, the main thing is the costs involved. Having a hotel is almost a must because many clients may not be able to host. Even if they can, I still need a place to sleep. I have used every discount hack available for booking hotels, including 3rd party and loyalty to a few brands. It doesn’t matter because at the end of the day, it’s still money being spent. The only way to really “beat” the hotel game is to have a friend or relative to bunk with and either do outcalls or book a room on select days. However, therein lies another potential issue: Trying to maintain reliable connections out of state where you may not know people or only see them sparingly: has also provided to be a challenge. I have done trips to some cities, even my current trip: thinking that I could rely on a friend or 2 to stay with. Only to get there, and they either aren’t available to host after all or they only want to offer a limited time that’s not sufficient for what is needed. And of course, non of them are ever okay with having clients over. Then I’m back to the hotel money pit, spending more than anticipated. The other thing is, it seems like almost every trip: there’s some news that gets released. And we may think it doesn’t affect, but it does. Even if for a couple or few days. This past couple years, I’ve had to endure everything from stock market crashes to new wars starting. Above all, the client bookings just aren’t coming in like they used to. I don’t necessarily want to see clients everyday, and definitely not multiple times a day: but I can’t go 3-4 days without a client and not start losing money. Except there’s one issue: I can’t stop traveling all together because my “base” market (which really isn’t even that, just a purgatory in between waiting to travel lol) has already become over saturated with advertisers. Plus it’s conservative and the men in the area either don’t want to pay, or they only want to pay $150. Which is not sustainable. What I have considered: relocating all together and keeping trips to within a day away. Or I can continue to tour further away, but only go places where I have friends at. However, even that’s dwindling. It’s been so many times I’ve made arrangements to stay at friend’s place for a couple/few days, and it turns into drama. I’m just tired of having to rely on half ass people, but some cities the hotel prices are so high: there’s no other way to go unless that option is available. I’m considering using rent a room by the week options going forward. But those could have the added drawback of not being able to host I would imagine. And if I’m losing money by not hosting, whatever I saved is essentially lost. So idk, it’s hard to say exactly how I’ll do it. I know there’s a couple clients here on the board who are wanting me to visit their cities, but it’s these type of challenges that have hindered my desire to want to make the journey. Unfortunately when visiting a town for a short period, sometimes the only fast and safe way to meet other gays are the hookup apps: besides going to a nightclub (which is more money and no guarantee of finding someone supportive of the biz). But the hookup apps are always people looking for just that. They aren’t reliable for anything else usually.

California consistently has the highest gas prices. Chicago area is also bad for it. But the prices in California are sickening. Every couple or so years, they break headlines 📰 for hitting the $7-8-9 mark somewhere I remember one trip, I put $50 and only got half a tank. When normally, $50 fills the tank when it’s $3/gallon or less.

I just left Florida this week: I was doing a whole lot of driving, but 100-150 miles to the next city beats the distance between cities in the Midwest. But the prices were $4 when I arrived 3 weeks ago, then they went down when it seemed T gave an “extension”. But then it went right back up again after the latest news 🤦🏽‍♂️ like I literally got 3/4 tank for $3.79 in one town, used it up driving to another city, came back and the next day went to refill it jumped to $4.17 😤 Below is a Circle K station in Orlando. The prices were about the same everywhere. What really gets me isn’t just the high price, but why is midgrade and premium running 50-90 cents more??? There’s not supposed to be much “noticeable” difference but regular is cheaper for a reason. But midgrade is about the most I been doing, buying premium feels like an insult

This is all reminiscent of the most recent case similar to this that happened in Detroit. Also somewhat similar to the “Ketamine Queen” story as well. I think the real moral of the story is, practice safe boundaries. Doesn’t mean be cold and distant towards providers, but make sure it’s transparent. Unfortunately, too many out here in the industry and the “come up” gay scene in general are greedy and unethical. They are relatively easy to pick up on after awhile, if not sooner than later.

I much rather that be the case. But when some come saying straight up ASSinine things, just to be funny and try to hush someone up and detract from their message without even knowing the reality: it’s hard to keep it cordial. At the same time I’m not really too phased about someone who actually leads themselves to believe this is true: ⬇️ Lol, that cracked me up. If you were an escort? Why not go ahead and be one, if you think you can do it better. What’s your age? You probably still have time…go ahead and try it out. Put a RentMen ad up, see how many inquires you sort thru to get your first client, and report back 😆 My 🔮 says you’re bluffing and projecting 😉

It’s not “proving” my success as I really don’t have to. I’m going along with the discussion showing: it’s one thing to “talk about” something, and another thing to actually be able to show otherwise. If someone wants to come on here and say how 2 hours notice is unreasonable, and I need a new career and I’m unhappy: I’m happy to show that there’s clients willing to abide by that. Not everybody is hell bent fixed on making escort’s schedule difficult, by being a pain in the ass like the one below ⬇️ I’m going to explain it to you like a 3 year old, since you seem to be a bit “slow to catch” and “misinformed” of how things work. For you and the people in the back: #1: I know people personally (including someone here) who don’t take same day appointments. Why not? That’s their personal business. It’s a lot of reasons why, they may have a partner that they can’t just constantly back out on plans. They may have family, another responsibilities, whatever the case may be. It’s not up to you to “wonder why”. Just simply fall in line. It’s not rocket science. #2: I’ve said it elsewhere before and it’s pretty clear in my ads: I may not even be in the same neighborhood or city, as the person who reaches out to me. You even said it and contradicted yourself: “Obviously if he wanted me to drive to see him, I would appreciate being allowed some common sense when it comes to driving time, distance, etc.” Now, you can’t pick and choose what’s sensible and define what is common sense when it comes to driving time/distance for each individual person. It could be 10 minutes for one person, an hour for another, 3 hours for another. Some of my clients live in towns that take 2 hours just to drive to. It’s a fact: most clients I find where I reside and in certain cities, all seem to be around the same area of downtown or the convention center: Which takes me at least an hour to get to because: NOT EVERY ESCORT LIVES IN A STEREOTYPICAL DOWNTOWN APARTMENT AND UBERS. Even the RentMen city listings, often showing the major metro area, is likely not where everyone lives. If that’s not enough for you, there’s plenty other references that talk about needing notice, that other escorts have taken the time to discuss elsewhere on the online world. Educate yourself, and maybe you wouldn’t look so ignorant and gaslight someone’s preferences to mere “complaining”. AND AND AND There you go. Question answered. Now, please take it for what it is. I’m not just answering for you, I’m answering for everybody who asks the same thing.

You mean like having business hours? That’s anywhere 🥴 But does it look like I’m having a hard time setting healthy boundaries for when I feel is best to be in the privacy of another person 🤔

The thing is, just because I may want to trade advice or talk about things that may be frustrating within the industry: does not equate to unhappiness. This is where you and some others are misinterpreting and taking it out of context. If you prefer escorts shut up and put up, just admit that’s what you prefer. If you can’t handle us talking about things that could be improved in the industry: remember you don’t have to read what I post. There’s 100s of threads here, why circle around mine and work yourself up ❌

You don’t have to make it make sense to me. I already know which feels better to me, and in my opinion: I feel better after a session with a client, than a “hookup”. I just made a thread about it the other week. One of my hookups, he promised to cook breakfast, made it seem like we had so much chemistry: but then the next morning he was more interested in going to Costco and keeping it “quiet” for his roommate. On top of that, we didn’t even exchange numbers 🤦🏽‍♂️ But he was talking about his boyfriend in Michigan, so I figured he’d give it to me if he desired to. I did disclose my escort status to him, but he wasn’t interested in paying. But his body, dick and ass had me 😵‍💫 so I kinda just allowed myself to enjoy it. But afterwards, I kinda wish I hadn’t done it. And the very next day I had a client who gave me $500. So it’s like, I spent unnecessary “energy” on someone who didn’t care to keep in touch, but then got $$$ from a client who now wants to be a regular.

He just posted a screenshot the other day saying he blocked me, he knows what he’s doing. He’s trying to talk behind my back, while simultaneously blocking me. Which goes to show the type of character he is. So he can gladly block me, and do both us a favor. As for you, you keep making hypothetical statements. You seem stuck on the premise that I alone have these plans, and don’t have anyone to answer to. And then throwing in I don’t have a 9-5 job, which is supposed to mean I’m always free 😆 Would you break your plans for an escort? If that escort reached out to you and let you know he was available? Don’t lie 🤥 because I already know…based on many interactions with clients and gay dudes in general, that it’s a no. So don’t try to come in my face with that double standard. You need to do some real life assessment, versus trying to assume how someone else’s life that you know nothing about, or how anything works. And I don’t shop at Costco, but thanks for suggesting something you clearly know nothing about ☝

What the hell does selling my time and company have to do with how much notice I need? And bottom or dress in drag, are you stereotyping? Question: would you just show up to your friend’s or family home with no notice? Is that something that’s a norm in your “circle”? And don’t say “it’s different”, because it’s not. I was with a client the other day, and his mother and niece were about to come over WHILE I WAS THERE. He was like, hell NO. I need a couple hours, I just woke up 😆

I thought you blocked me, and yet you’re still here talking about me? Comical… You’re spot on. And these days, I will try to accommodate a same day session when I can: but a lot of times, depending on how far the commute is I simply can’t do it. It’s not even always about whether I’m ready or not, it’s just the logistics and commute that are the issue Many same day requests, they want to meet by like 9 p.m. at the latest. Most try to meet even earlier. The thing is: 4 PM to 7 PM is usually “prime time” for most people unless they are alone. That’s usually the time people are either wrapping up gym, meeting people for dinner, having a drink etc. That’s really not the best time to reach out and ask if someone is available right away. However, I am willing to meet them if they’re willing to meet later in the evening. If they want to meet during prime time, they need to give more advance notice. That’s why most times: I can’t meet same day clients until like after 8 p.m. Or if I’m in a hotel I can do something like before noon or 3-5 p.m. But all that still requires notice. I actually had a client who I liked a lot, but both times he reached out same day. The 2nd time I spent a good part of the evening trying to work something out. He didn’t want to drive out late, and was trying to book me in the morning. I was like, hotel checkout is at noon. So I have to work around that. He was trying to get me to ask for 2 PM checkout. I’m like bruh, I have no control over that. We ended up not meeting, and it pissed me off and after that I told him: NO MORE SAME DAY BOOKINGS. And I even told him, if you had let me know the day before or even earlier in the day (he was trying to contact me at 6 p.m. on a Friday, when I was with my friend having dinner and shopping), then I would have been ready, hotel room booked and all. That’s what some of these posters like @marylander1940 don’t understand: WE HAVE A LIFE. It’s not just about notice. It’s not about trying to be mean or controlling or anything. But if I don’t know how to prepare for someone’s arrival, how can I plan anything at all?

I just hope you know: everytime you start talking shit about what I post, I’m going to have RECEIPTS to show that how you feel about me, is irrelevant. Case in point just yesterday: a real gentleman client booked me just like I asked. I went ahead and did same day notice, because I didn’t have anything immediately going on, but I still needed 2 hours notice (finish eating, showering, and the commute to downtown all takes 2 hours, that’s nothing crazy to ask). This is what I tell ALL clients. That I need 2 hours notice. It’s in my ads. And anyway, aren’t you the same person who talked about going to some escorts hotel in DC, walking over there and then being told you need a deposit when you got to the elevator? You the same person going around trying to see escorts on 15 minutes notice. It’s called boundaries, honey. It’s called taking control over one’s schedule and time, and making sure I’m actually ready for the client. And in my experience, nobody is really available last minute in reality. That’s just something that hookup culture (which has crossed over into the escort lifestyle) has created.

I’m on a couple other “gay forums” that aren’t escort related, and the amount of topics that discuss “hookup culture” and how some struggle with it, is endless. Some people out there, don’t mind miscellaneous hookups. But for some people that’s all they want to bring to the table. That’s why sometimes I rather go out to a public place and meet someone where there’s at least some kind of “storyline” behind it, versus just being on apps or going to a bathhouse where there’s whole premise is just, “show me your dick”. And yes I’ll play for “without charge” every so often, but there has to be some sort of organic connection at play. It’s amazing how insulting some guys get when the topic of funds come up. What I don’t like about hookup culture is, people out here doing what escorts do for free…and just messing up the whole game. Like I was about to fuck with a guy few months ago, at his hotel while he was visiting town. But then he’s like, “my partner doesn’t let me do sleepovers, and I’m going to dinner with coworkers.” I’m thinking to myself like, so I’m basically I’m going to provide free escort services, for nothing? I know married clients who don’t even treat me that shitty. I got dressed, and made my exit before it went any further 🚪 it’s not simply hooking up that’s the issue. It’s these open relationship dudes who come to town for business, expecting everyone to be okay giving them freebies. Then they get an attitude when someone has a little dignity for themselves. Like geez, even if you don’t pay me…at least show that I’m worth spending time with.

I want to make one more example of the escort side of things, and I’m leaving it here: yesterday I agreed to do something that I stopped doing long time ago, and that’s meeting a new client without a deposit. Now, unlike others here who are just talking and making excuses about not paying deposits: I actually have a real time visual example of what can actually happen. I agreed to meet a guy who didn’t know how to do deposits, and was giving him benefit of the doubt since he was an older guy near a town I offer appointments to: Question #1: everyone sees I said the price is $400, right? Question #2: everyone sees I said it takes me an hour+ from where I am to drive to his location, right? So tell me WHY ON EARTH this dude (client) tells me when an hour into my commute to him , talking on the phone asking, “it’s $75 for 75 minutes right 🤦🏽‍♂️ “ I was like, this is EXACTLY WHY I require deposits in the first place. HERES THE KICKER (no pun intended): The guy also never mentioned he was disabled, unable to walk, in a wheelchair and had 1 leg. Thats not shaming someone’s medical condition BUT, all of that plays into the RECURRING traumatic surprises that we have to deal with. I was not expecting to escort a disabled man for $75, but it also wouldn’t have been any better to drive 2 hours round trip for nothing. I went ahead and showed up anyway, but thankfully, he managed to agree to additional funds after a good hard conversation (no pun intended), where I showed him my website with my rates listed, but still not enough for my 75 minute session but enough for 20 minutes. And then he came up with a little more for another 15 minutes. Still not the $400 I initially agreed to drive the hour+ for. But that’s the type of miscommunications I like to avoid. If a deposit helps in assuring the client is APPROVED for meeting, my work is done. Deposits are not punitive. Deposits are not taking it out on other clients. Deposits are not scams. Deposits are not a front for a drug addiction or greed or any of the hearsay that is being mentioned. Deposits when asked by legit escorts, are to ensure the client and I are on the same page. It ensures I’m not wasting my time with the barrage of inquiries that come thru to us. Question for all the deposit naysayers: if you had to multiply the amount of times you had someone flake on your deposit by 365 days a year: would you still be an escort and not take a deposit? Think about it. You probably only hire every so often. You’re not posted up 24/7/365 taking inquiries from men who don’t even know what they look like. I kindly ask the forum community, to not spread inaccurate propaganda about deposits and providers who require deposits. There’s nothing that can excuse that attitude, until you walk a mile or 2 in an escort’s…condom 🎤

In my experience: deposits can make sense anywhere. Just last month, I had someone book a session 1.5 miles from where I was staying. As mentioned in my other post, it was a same day booking where I also had to book a hotel (I was bunking in a friends place but we agreed I wouldn’t have clients over, people are funny about that…just like some clients don’t like to host from their homes). It wouldn’t make any sense to run off and book a room, unless I had a confirmed client. I also don’t like the idea of booking a room and just “waiting around” for nobody to show up. In his case, he couldn’t send a deposit so I offered instead to have him meet me at the hotel and exchange the cash deposit in person. All worked out accordingly. The other 2 clients arranged deposits as instructed, and all was well with that too. Granted, this was a town that hasn’t been plagued by deposit scams like some cities have.

Goodbye…you’re a man full of assumptions, non of which accurately portray escorts in the industry. If that’s how you feel though, perhaps don’t book people that you subliminally feel animosity towards.

What in the actual 🦆uck? 🤣 First of all, that makes zero sense. Secondly, you’re stuck on the premise that the financial risk is equal. You think an escort should spend $79-$100 on a profile, with only the potential to meet a client AND provide that client with payment to cover a hotel? All the while the escort may not be in the same financial bracket as the client? Thats like instacart, offering to pay for your hotel so you can cook the food that you order, without paying them for it first of course. Try that, and let me know how it works out for you.

So that should be an epiphany for all the guys on here dissing deposits: that it’s more at play than just a deposit. From my experience, it’s nothing to do with deposits. But moreso the drugs, the hookup apps, the overall flakiness in the gay dating/hookup culture. A deposit shouldn’t be any different than asking for payment: and I can truthfully say right now, there’s a lot of hate towards escorts right now even outside of this forum (which is fairly mild and petty). The fakes and flakes, have really messed up the game for genuine guys…some who have left because now even the client pool is tainted with flakes. But that’s a by product of people mixing hookup app culture with legitimate escort biz, and just fucking up the whole game.

So you just basically confirmed that it doesn’t really have nothing to do with deposits? Because it sounds like those guys ghosted and cancelled last minute even when there wasn’t deposit talks being made?

What are you using to vet these escorts? Do you look for AMPLE reviews? Do you look at how long their ad has been photo verified? Do they have any kind of website, biz card, etc? Also how soon are they looking for the deposit and how much of the session is being asked? In regards to: I get that most of them are dealing with some bad clients on their end, but there's no reason to take it out on all clients. You see it as “taking it out” like it’s a punishment. Asking for deposits isn’t a punishment. It’s a preferred biz practice. It’s how someone chooses to operate in a biz that is yes, often filled with flakes. Before I started doing deposits: do you know how many times, I’ve driven somewhere…only to get there and the client doesn’t answer? Or how many times I pulled out my own credit card to pay for to host accommodations that people didn’t show up for? That’s the thing, people here can talk all they want about how their biz doesn’t require deposits…but even someone who has a doctors office, isn’t running out, traveling across town to see “patients”. TO SUM UP THIS CONVERSATION: People need to view escort deposits like Uber, Lyft, Door Dash, Instacart etc etc. ALL those services require what? Payment UPFRONT. Not even just a deposit, which is a courtesy. They require FULL PAYMENT, The reason why there’s so many flakes? Because people continue to undermine the legitimacy of our business. Most clear minded people in their 20s, 30s and 40s do not want to deal in a business where they have to come out of pocket, for someone they have no idea what they look like. That’s why many gay men these days are on these hookup apps, the caveat is: it’s easier to be blocked, and if you’re not conventionally attractive, you’re not going to find your way into everybody’s pants as easily as a RentMan may offer. Right now, the escort industry is already at risk. Political climate is threatening to suppress the ability to even be an escort in 2026. If you look around, there’s hardly any sites except megapersonals.eu (which sadly is a hot mess dumpster 🚮 fire 🔥 cesspool of flaky clients and scammy advertisements…with the occasionally good apples here and there) that allow gay men to actively call themselves “escorts”. The last thing we as a community need to be doing, is making it harder to create an identity for ourselves. At the end of the day, it’s up to us how much risk we desire to take. It’s not up to clients, or other escorts, or people on a forum who never really give the real 💯 truth of their experiences. I always want to hear both sides. Also for the record: every so often I will accept a client WITHOUT a deposit. But there has to be a few things in place, in order to do so: but the issue is, most DON’T fall into these categories and I don’t always have time to sort thru who’s doing what: 1) Same day appointments require a deposit 2) I will not pay or book a hotel for a client without a deposit, unless I’m already hosting anyway but: the deposit client comes first (pun intended 🤣 3) If they are more than 20 minutes away, I require a deposit 4) If it’s after dark, deposit