JB_Studio38

Ha. I can only imagine. Story of my life being based in Missouri. Always having to go elsewhere. KC is dead, St. Louis is on life support. Just waiting to catch the right week where I can go on a long tour, save up, and get the next U-Haul the fuck outta here. All it is is cheap guys who want bareback and open relationships 🤦🏾‍♂️ I am mainly wanting to go to Tex for the after holiday shopping and get into a bigger market. And as far as the Midwest goes, that’s the next biggest place besides Chicago. But it likely won’t be on my move to list. Kamala needs to re-emphasize to Texas that statement about “I can see legalizing it”

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1276617 I have been considering to plan a visit to the area, however I had forgotten about this I heard on other boards. I know someone mentioned why cities like Austin have lots of flakes, now maybe he knows why. If/When I go, I may have to make clients agree to an explicit agreement that it’s for time and travel expense only. Which likely will mean getting out of way upfront (or even before meeting).

This is partly why I don’t travel to dudes for freebie sex much anymore, unless it’s a paid encounter. Even then a deposit is required unless I can verify the address. I live too far from where most clients are, to make a blank trip anywhere. As much as some guys like to tout they don’t pay for sex, they should because when they get it too easy, they don’t appreciate it. I need to know that someone is putting some work in: either getting dressed, or coming to me, something. Now as it pertains to other escorts, it could be a security thing or the perk of not having to send a deposit. It’s easier to just see who shows up without a lot to lose (by sending you across the street in case you don’t show up), than it is to get someone to actually confirm they’re going to show up.

He’s already been blocked. I recall he reached out before and said something to me about not wanting to pay. He popped back up again and contacted me, so me giving the chance that never should be given: I talked to him momentarily. I have to deal with trash bags 🚮 all the time in my area. One guy reached out, didn’t want to exchange numbers. When I suggested he get a 2nd phone like I do if privacy is such a concern, he blocked me. Like dude, it’s a fucking number. These clowns expect others to be gullible enough to talk to them on an app and meet in person, so they can waste my time coming over and then 10 minutes in say they can’t go thru with it. Goodbye, don’t let the door hit ya, where the last dude split ya ✌ Granted this was just an app excursion, not an actual paying client. But regardless, it goes to show how irritating alternative sites can be.

I find it exciting, to a degree. I like to have some kind of idea about who I’m meeting. More clients have started sending pics than before. I also think letting someone know what you look like, takes out the initial shock factor of the first meet. And like @Vulgariisaid, even though I don’t necessarily pick and choose who I see, I may feel I can’t offer certain services to someone in the way I wish to. But that’s pretty rare for the most part. That said, the hardest part I think is the traveling initial contact part. Sometimes I just want to advertise in a new city, like a TV commercial. Versus just posting in the same area day after day not getting any hits. Meanwhile the clock is ticking on the renewal date for my ads. I have bills due like every week. Adding another bill to it isn’t the most fun. But many times people just ask if I’m “Here now” or available today. It’s hard to convey what I’m actually trying to do, and I don’t just pack up and magically appear in a city. I usually need someone to be waiting when I get there. If I had unlimited free hotels it wouldn’t be a big deal but…unfortunately it doesn’t work that way.

That’s what I’m saying! How do these dudes expect me to believe they can afford a couple hundred 💵 when they’re telling people on their ads that they can’t give gas money? Some people are just horrendously cheap. I did meet one guy who said something similar, he turned out to be okay. He just said that people will sometimes hit him up asking for money and it’s “different” if he approaches me for the service. But in the end, he still only ended up being a 1 timer (as most clients on A4A tend to be). That said, I will tell clients to remove such information from their ads, if they expect to meet with me.

I know some mention they post on scruff, A4A, Grindr, etc. Would you bother with these types? People like this who contact me, seem to be open to paying for my services…but have something like this in their ads: and then again he says: We chatted and he seemed up for it, but I was getting the impression he was trolling so I told him I read his ad and based on what he said, it don’t sound like I’m what he’s actually looking for. And if he’s not trying to pay for anything, I wouldn’t want him to waste his or my time. Seemed to blow his cover and he didn’t reply. But I asked him the same earlier and he just said, “yeah I’m open to, if prices are reasonable”. But then continued to sound like going nowhere with the discussion. To me it comes off as red flag. A potential like that seems the type that would short change or refuse to pay, or even chargeback a payment.

I can’t speak for everybody but I been in the game since 2008 and never put any injection. I wouldn’t even want to do that even if it did get me hard. I’ve always been a fan of the natural stuff sold in health stores, which do work…and then maybe a lil viagra/Cialis stuff for occasional backups. For example, I have one that tastes like mint and chocolate, but I have had it for months and only occasionally take a piece of a piece of it. I really don’t even like a forced erection. I like a natural erection like someone said earlier: that comes and goes. Having a constantly rock hard dick will damage it to where you WILL need to rely on those things, I feel. Best practice is nutrition, supplements and limiting sex. I rarely see more than 1 or 2 clients a day. If I do, I’m pacing myself. My mind has to feel horny, before my Dick does…

Yeah, I feel in the case of what the OP mentioned, it’s probably better left unsaid. Sometimes if a person senses they are being rejected, they’re not going to want to give a 2nd chance down the road. Could end up getting blocked. Just keep it simple, “I enjoy your company but having some things going on right now.” Now, if you can say it tactfully: by all means throw in that you started seeing someone. There does seem to be a bit of cake eating in this scenario, however I can’t help but quote: “I figured out a few things about his professional/real life and think it is better to distance myself. I don't want him to know I know his other life. I met a younger guy who has an amazing body. He is not an escort, but he really needs money and is willing to do things. I want to help him. He's hotter and younger.” The first part sounds a bit invasive. Why would someone go snooping 🧐 around for information about someone? Unless it directly pertains to y’all’s Encounter together, I don’t think it matters what his real/professional life entails unless he directly revealed it. That’s why when some clients get flustered just because I send out a basic questionnaire to include a Name/Age, Basic Stats, Host or Travel, City they’re in: It’s not some ploy to get their life information and track them down. I just want to know who I’m meeting up with. That’s basic business etiquette. Beyond that, I could care less what they do outside. As for the 2nd part, it doesn’t sound like the “new” guy is much better than the other. Amazing body. Not an escort. Needs money. Wants to help him and he’s younger. Hmm 🤔 what does that sound like? A whole bunch of red flags. Do you ever watch forensic files or dateline? Just be careful. He could just be a younger guy who needs money with a beautiful body. Nothing wrong with that or wishing to help him. But if you have a regular and are giving him the blowoff for this other person, maybe need to assess whether it’s worth it.

This is always good info. What do you feel happened in 2002 and 2003? I was still a minor during that time lol, but could it have been the George Bush and 9/11 stuff that affected business? I also agree 2012 seemed to be the best years. Do you feel the biz now is in a weird place? We’re basically at the same level of 2005 and 2009. Both volatile years (I recall inflation was an issue in 2005 and recession in 2009). Of course when I look at all others, regulars seems to offset the overall trend. I think Biden could steer us in the right move, despite Republican fears. People blamed Biden for everything, can someone give the man credit for under $3 gas prices for once 😂 (which really doesn’t mean shit in the scheme of things. Cheap guys are going to be cheap ass guys regardless of gas prices).

Guys have any? I know for me: my Resolution is to leave the crap markets I’ve been based out of, hopefully within the next 1 to 2 months. Even though I tour and travel a lot, it doesn’t make up for going 7 days or longer without a booking when I come home. I don’t think I’ve had a serious new client locally since Thanksgiving weekend. Just my 2-3 reliable regulars. I didn’t have this issue when touring. It irritates the soul… I’m also going to cut back or eliminate visiting cities for the added perk of meeting with friends. Many of the friends I meet in other cities are happy to meet when I come, but they rarely plan trips to my area. Plus, I been finding some markets I been going to regularly where I have friends, start becoming less productive when it comes down to bookings. The other week I did a tour to a couple cities I haven’t worked in years…and was just fine going someplace I don’t know anyone. Actually met new people and made new friends Going forward, just going to focus on places that have the demand, not only based on what friends I want to see.

The thing is: we’re not getting paid for doing that though. If I were to answer all the messages on RentMen 1 by 1, and sit and wait/respond for replies: that would equate to a 16 hour work shift. I’d might as well get a job at a call center and at least earn something 🤦🏾‍♂️ I advertise on Adam4Adam which has this feature standard: but even then I just send out Pre-written copy paste messages to inquires. Matter of fact, I always have tons of messages in queue: I may send 1 or 2 messages out of courtesy to acknowledge the client, but that’s if they’ve written something that sounds thought out and relevant to answer. The RentMen chat feature is innovative, but we’re not getting paid. That’s the problem. Just like the private picture requests which I never respond to anymore. If clients want more interaction, we need to get paid more. Not just on a possibility. I was shocked when a “client” told me he clicked my website link and there was a message that popped up “warning, this site may be trying to steal your information” It’s a default message because I guess people were falling for scams. But, after that I had to again modify my auto reply.

Many of the hits I get on the messenger are private gallery requests or just commentary stuff. For me as a traveling advertiser, it’s inefficient to communicate by messenger because many times I may not even notice it until hours later. Maybe I have to put my phone to recognize notifications from it. But I have sound notifications on. And like @Kevin Slater mentioned, that could equate to spending a lot of time on back and forth messages. For now I leave the auto reply on, but everything is detailed with all info. Sometimes I’ll spend 15-20 minutes crafting the most informative Auto-Reply. If I’m not busy or the person seems to have responded thoroughly, then I’ll sometimes shoot back a reply. Issue is: many of the ones on there don’t respond back, which is partly why many providers have become adverse to it.

The other day I had 2 Asian clients, which is rare for me except when I’m on the west coast. No stigma towards them, but I will say in my experience they can be quite different than American guys in many ways. But many also tend to be quite professional in their approach. No overly kinky long drawn out stuff. I know many Asian guys often don’t reveal that they are, before meeting. So it can often be hard to “not take Asian clients”. Unless an escort specifically says that, which would qualify as discriminatory. I’ve known some fairly attractive Asian guys I’ve met. One of whom I had to run off because after we played around, I introduced him to a friend, and then they played around a couple of times behind my back. Hell, no. That’s violation of guy code. I told my friend, how would you like it if I went and started fucking your 2 friends you introduced me to, outside of our interactions? Have some decency people 🤦🏾‍♂️

This is great to know you’re well! Sorry that happened so close to the holidays. I been trying to go to Buffalo for months and was planning to this time, even getting as far as Ohio last week, but had to wrap it up because of the storm incoming. I was hoping to go earlier before winter. Seems all these storms, whether heat, hurricanes or snow storms are just getting so crazy. Venus and Uranus weather is not needed here! Penis and Uranus is preferred 👏🏽

That definitely sounds nice. But on the other spectrum: I lived in Arizona for 2 months and did find the continuous sunny weather to get a bit: weird lol. And I spent time in SoCal and only seen it rain like once. BUT: after a few Midwest winters I see now why majority of my classmates in grade school in Florida were from Michigan, Illinois, Connecticut, New York, Ohio, etc. I was barely able to get out of Kentucky because the roads were like skiing trails. Lot of people probably couldn’t leave town for Christmas. I was getting alerts from this all night yesterday: If I ever do move back to a year round warm place…I will never complain about Sunny weather again. I got to feel the sun burning on my face today while driving (even though it was only 10 degrees outside) for the first time in weeks 😆

Other thing too: All of the north becomes a big bowl of Frosted Flakes when the weather doesn’t cooperate. The snow from this week threw off most all my possibilities for the weekend in several cities. Squeezed in a few meets before the weather turned to shit, but now that it’s come and dumped on everyone, everything is dead. My RentMen messenger is just people requesting private pics unlocked only. And keep getting the same request to a hotel in town, from guys who won’t respond back. Winter is the devil. Even Florida is sounding real good right now 😆

Very common in L.A. Add that to the flaky city list. But I think that’s common in big cities. Idk what it is. I know that dealing with paid ventures online tends to inaccurate portray the possibilities of a city. Sometimes I do better off just going to a club and meeting someone, but without sex work being the intent more as a backdrop. I know the intent is good, but Idk if I would say that you met with another provider. Though it is honest and can help someone take other opportunities, not sure when that would be the best time to mention. What if the other provider flakes last minute? Then you have to go back to the other guy and say that fell thru and to come over? I think as I’ve mentioned in the past, I still think deposits could help clients and provider. Something like, “I can send you a deposit to confirm our session, but if you have to cancel it…can you send it back?” That way it gives them option to decide if they can actually duly accept the booking or not. Of course, this is assuming perfect world and that everyone is not playing games. I know that can be hard to tell.

It is, you’re right. But Grindr isn’t sex work. If I used Grindr solely to earn money, I would be in bad shape. It’s hard enough getting it for free, even harder to get it paid. And even when I do strike it lucky and meet someone, the quality of the meet is often low. Grindr is mostly an illusion cloaked in possibilities. You can spend way more time chatting to 20 people, than just 1 person booking a session. Plus it’s (mostly) all free. And free means anybody with no intentions can sign up and: waste people’s time 👏🏽 Also many people are on Grindr for the wrong reasons. I don’t believe it should be used as a free instant brothel service like many guys do. I don’t go on, “because I’m suddenly horny” like @Jamie21 mentioned some guys do. That’s what porn is for. The occasional times I do go on, it’s more like: “I want to see what compatible guy is in this area. And hopefully we can connect and enjoy each other’s company at some point” The times I’ve gone on trying to get laid, is rarely ever satisfying. I get better results paying for ads and meeting clients who have a true appreciation for my talent. I used to have better luck at nightclubs, blackplanet, adam4adam, and even the PHONE CHAT lines like megaphone back in the early 2000s 😆

Special request to where? Please elaborate…

sounds intricate, but could have been a way to make that workout somehow. Perhaps as described within that time frame, however “a la carting” them in that manner I think probably seemed a bit much. If you’re going to hire a couple, hire them both. Or one or the other. Payment stuff aside, I’ve learned how couples work over the years. I don’t usually approach them to begin with BUT, when they approach me I already know: it’s rare to have one without the other in the precise manner you want to have them. Unless the other is a woman and other party is 💯 gay. Partly why I don’t really seek them out. One isn’t going to let you sneak off with the other, or meet with the other first and then join in midway. The hiring separate part is moreso a COMPLETE separate thing, not necessarily to be done halfway thru the movie

You can add Kansas City and St. Louis to that list. It’s one of the areas with the most bad reports, and the same time wasters hit me up over and over and over again. I thought I blocked them, change phones and show up again. One in St. Louis, I sent a $1,000 cash app request to after he tried to book me again after flaking 4-5 other times. He seemed shocked. I wonder why 🤔 Hopefully this time he stays away for good. And being in KC, it’s just people who can never coordinate anything. Someone contacted me today asking if I’m available for him to come over tonight. I send him the instructions to book me if I host and he’s like, “next time”. I’m like, well if you can host and have hotel info to verify I can do it that way also. He’s like, “I am in hotel but can’t host”. They rarely do things conducive to booking a session. They’re always expecting last minute accommodations, but have the least flexibility. But also; some cities change. My first trip to Phoenix years ago (maybe 2012ish), I cancelled halfway there because everybody on my follow up list flaked. But then it took a few trips over the months before it finally started working out (I was living in Denver and the closest place to escape winter was either Phoenix or Las Vegas) However, I’ve seen it go back and forth between dragging and being lucrative on different visits. Hard to tell when. Like, some cities you have to “play” over and over again and hit it at the right season. Kind of how football teams do, hint hint @BuffaloKyle lol

Who knows. Best to just have your protective policy in place. Whether that be deposits, confirmation and instructions by a certain time, etc. Also Austin is just a pocket of liberal in a much bigger surrounding. I was thinking it’s the “biggest little city” but that’s actually Reno I was thinking of (which also is flaky as fuck city). Again, gay acceptance and visibility don’t always mean much and can actually work against the cause. It can also translate to: “Yeah we’re gay and open and proud, and I will give you my goods for free! You should do the same!”

For me it depends. I live in an area where I’m not interested in majority of the guys who reach out to me for hookups. So when I’m home I’m usually just escorting. Not trying to hook up with the ever-horny White guys who don’t believe in paying, but just want to trade nudes all day and take forever to actually meet (not to pull the race card but that’s just the truth in certain areas of the Midwest). I’m not one who hooks up just to get off. I have to feel there’s a purpose or story behind it. Even if it’s spontaneous, there can still be some sort of interesting lead to it. I hooked up with 3 guys at a Nude resort/camp last year, but each one were just funny and cool and they actually had more to say than just, “hung?” and a bunch of ass/dick pics. Hookups can be more satisfying in the short run but escorting is more fulfilling to me overall. I know our business favors the no strings approach, but in my personal life I look for a little more involved.

I was discussing this elsewhere about Nashville. I rarely make visits there much except once a year for a couple days. But the market there is definitely bottoms up (no pun intended). Being that you included Austin, in my experience it seems it’s often the “entertainment” cities that have this issue the most. Las Vegas, Miami included. Also towns that have experienced housing crisis/shortages like Nashville and Austin are also prone to it. And then when you add the fact that there’s more escorts than the city can actually accommodate (when I lived in Nashville and was doing somewhat decent for myself, there were only like 5 escorts. Even then it was feast and famine. Now there’s like 50 and it’s fell off completely). That said, it’s so many places that are becoming like that lately. I haven’t really found any 1 flake proof city these days. I have pretty much had to run the same policy in every city. However it is hard when some places with very conservative demographics don’t want to pay deposits or anything. Had that happen in one town, and since neither wanted to send a deposit and wanted the same time: I booked them both in case one flaked, and they both showed up. Literally. Not something I’d normally do or recommend, but it was quite the adventure 😆