MscleLovr

I don’t dispute that he’s handsome, and I prefer him in his slimmed-down form now. I was teasing you about not posting his new nude pic (outdoors at home, that he posted very recently) as you’re normally so swift ;-)

To quote Google: slang, a woman who accompanies a homosexual man to give the impression that he is heterosexual

That’s his beard @Trebor

I’m shocked @marylander1940. You seem to be flagging in your devotion to Nick Sandell. Is something wrong? I ask because I noticed that he finally inched just that bit further out of the metaphorical closet and he went ‘full frontal’. And for the curious, it’s decent but nothing amazing.

@Ajac was that when you first realized you have ‘come-to-bed’ eyes? ;-)

My 2 cents: you had an argument with a man that you’ve been “dating of sorts” for a short time. I’m not sure it’s helpful to allocate fault. You had transactional sex with this man. Then you went on to enjoy more sex with him, and you say you did “things outside of sex” together. So the boundaries became very blurred. Did either of you say anything about having feelings for the other man? He moved to Texas for 6-8 weeks for work. You say he could only spare 1 day if you went to see him there. It’s not clear who suggested you visit. At this stage, you’re definitely not ‘partners’; you’re just dating each other and it’s not exclusive because of your work. If it was your idea, then I feel you should offer to pay the cost of going there. If it was his idea that you visit, I’d expect him to offer to pay your travel costs. I certainly don’t agree with the last paragraph of your original post, essentially that gay men are unreasonable. I also don’t think that gay men are too sensitive or likely to take offence. Money is the major cause of disagreement among heterosexual couples (according to marriage/relationship counselors that I know). I can tell you that the reason I fell so hard 6 years ago for the young man I live with is that he bought me gifts, arranged surprise trips, insisted on picking up the dinner-check etc. These may seem small things but, as an older man, I had become used to thinking first of the younger man and used to always paying. His caring for me and his actions made me realise how much I wanted an equal relationship. I feel you have to draw clear and strong boundaries around your work (transactional sex) and your dating life (where sex and everything else has to be mutually negotiated) if you are to avoid future arguments and conflict.

How dare you @Trebor. You’re speaking about my future ex-boyfriend. He’s a lovely guy; he was a football jock and had to slim down to become a model.

Thanks @Whitman - I hadn’t seen that pic and it’s always good to see Alex smiling

If there was some difficulty or problem with the experience @Palidod, I think it can usually be discussed here without naming the guy. IIRC I’ve seen brief comments such as ‘I had a great time with (name of the guy). For more details, DM me’. A similar approach might be ‘I’d told him beforehand I’m a top/bottom but he said he wasn’t able to bottom for me/top me - what should I have done?’

He fills those briefs beautifully @Whitman

@FrankR I like the observation you posted from Darrin Patrick

If no-one ever spent money on pleasure, the world’s oldest profession would cease to exist.

It was a long time ago - when Premier was operating and had a good roster of guys - I can’t recall really but it was something like Jon/Jonathon.

I agree @Trebor. Here you go… https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-P4rrpLAdK4Q/WoG-ETuNHwI/AAAAAAAAPzA/a2cbSPG0QvsgfEHkN1dY8Yj5UsSqKcDBACLcBGAs/s1600/jacob%252Btumblr_owd9qzPoOX1qjaj7so2_500.jpg&imgrefurl=https://forthebeautifulmen.blogspot.com/2018/02/jacob-dooley-naked-f.html&tbnid=Wxk7szahfuwp5M&vet=1&docid=5dtLPdWycvYIoM&w=467&h=750&q=jacob+dooley%2Bnaked&hl=en_GB&source=sh/x/im

Blond? No. I recall a dark-haired guy who certainly delivered a premier, and very enjoyable, service after I‘d paid a long visit to the Barnes Collection

It was a generous act on your part @Luv2play I hope he remembers and is equally generous with his time when you next meet.

Thank you @njr47. You’re very right. I didn’t recognise him from that photo; it must have been taken some years ago.

Slowly, oh so slowly....out of the closet

So true @Epigonos Exactly my experience too.

Always, and often hands-free @marylander1940

Once you’ve found a guy who interests you greatly, my thought is that you open a conversation along these lines… You look very attractive to me I don’t like rushed sessions as I like to get to know a guy Which works better for you - overnight dates? Or a long date in the daytime? Spell out what you want to do. Eg let’s have lunch together, then come back to my place to play; then go for a walk, play sport, watch a movie; then play together again and you leave at 6/7pm. You get to sleep in your own bed. Only then ask about rate. If it seems high to you, ask if there’s a day when he’s not usually busy. Mention the advantage to him of sleeping in his own bed. If he makes no offer of a reduced hourly rate for a multi-hour booking, move on to the next attractive guy.

You made the right decision @leftbench23 I had a similar experience years ago. An escort who was ‘my type’ had rave reviews here and he was also strongly rated by a fellow-poster. He proved difficult to meet, but I agreed to his insisted-upon 4pm at his place. I arrived at 3.50pm but then phoned to say I was early, and asked if I could come up; he said No and told me to wait...and called me at 4.20. I had waited so I went ahead. He wanted me to top him on the sofa; I suggested it’d be better in his bed; he said No, he slept there…and usually went to clients’ places. I’m pretty sure he faked orgasm as I fucked him from behind, and he tried to get me to leave before 5pm. He said “the hour’s up” and grew indignant with me when I pointed out it was only 40minutes. Because the whole experience was ‘meh’, for the ‘hell of it’ I suggested he cut his agreed fee by 1/3rd and he was furious. I paid in full and left. It was a great and early learning experience for me. Poor customer service was something I never tolerated again, and if I encountered it I always moved on.

Thank you for the link @Whitman - I had no luck finding it before. And thank you to @harey - as I mention above, I really enjoyed reading the article.

@ericwinters were you the person who posted in another thread earlier about Cognitive Dissonance? I’ve searched but I cannot find that post. There was a link to an article in The Atlantic and I just wanted to note how greatly I enjoyed reading the article.

Thanks for reminding me @MikeBiDude. I know (of course) of the book but I’ve never read it. I’ll order it today.