m_writer

Thx. Although I'm not happy with him. I am more upset with myself for my momentary lack of judgement. 
FYI. I've found the restaurant he works at... I'll be stopping by soon 

Strangely enough he was dumb enough to be too truthful. With the investigative skills of another masseur, he's been found. He is exactly who he says he is and a restaurant manager. Close by me. I look forward to walking in for cocktails. The look on his face when he realizes who I am, will be priceless 

Looking forward to an awesome day ahead with a feast at my home and another with family on Saturday.  Many wishes for a positive and pleasant day to all!  How are you spending the Thanksgiving holiday?

Just an FYI for anyone who knows Josh who used to work at Adonis off and on as a bartender, doorman, and dancer.
Josh is still dealing with the brain tumors but seems to be doing well and is in good spirits. He really appreciates all the support he has gotten from the community. If you know him, feel free to reach out, I think he misses the interaction with all of us pervs.
 

I started in 2012, I was still in high school in 2005 lol.  Maybe you’re thinking of someone else?  Or maybe the dates are off?  Anyways, this is me today.  

all of this is a reminder of the hard work the moderators here do and a reminder of @RadioRob  seemingly coming out of nowhere after "Daddy" died and saving this forum a couple years ago....many of us were exchanging email addresses and contact info with our favorite posters back then in anticipation of the forum's demise......there hasn't been a forum donation mention lately, I don't think.....and, gee, the holiday season is coming up.......
https://www.companyofmen.org/donate/
oh, about that "other site"?.......I look in about once a month, read about somebody's trip report to Bangkok, look for anything else of interest, and log out.....hell, even the Politics forum over there only gets a post about once a week.....can you imagine??!!
 

We will need to agree to disagree then.
C.o.M.retained the members who can do exactly THAT. The "other site" attracted the petulant children who will stamp their feet and call names when you disagree. So the forum over there is a cesspool of toxic group-think by naive, angry children.
None of them are missed, here.
Kudos to the administration here for cutting through the nonsense and putting their foot down in the end.

I'm sitting here in a San Francisco hotel room feeling really awful about the experience I just had with one of the areas' best reviewed (on this site!) providers. I was coming into town to do some networking and had wanted to reach out to a provider that had received consistently good reviews on this forum. I felt confident in reaching out to the and was anticipating the meet-up when it all just felt like a nails-on-the-chalkboard experience.
The provider was a prolific texter. He asked for "stats" and; while not uncomfortable, provided him with pictures and details as far as what I wanted to have happened, and to my delight, there were no issues in our back-and-forth's.
Upon coming into town, he asked to move the date to accommodate going back to Los Angeles for Thanksgiving. Luckily, I had that flexibility and; recognizing that scheduling around a holiday can be awkward, was good with that. 
Then, I started to receive what I deem the "flake texts". Reconfirming the time and place a multiple of three times, Asking for confirmation each time. I'm sympathetic to that - some of the best providers on this forum have attested to flakes, and I've always lived up to my commitments and his reputation was solid, so I always responded positively that it was still correct, still a yes. He asked if he could do a workout in before and maybe 5 minutes late at tops. Again, this was not unreasonable and I said yes.
Time comes, he arrives, on-time and polite. We go back to my hotel room and then...everything just stops.
He's not verbal. Not emotional. He just STANDS THERE.
It really threw me for a loop. Not that it couldn't happen with any escort, (or course it can and it did) but this one had SO.MANY.GOOD.REVIEWS.ON.THIS.SITE. I couldn't do anything to engage him for 10 minutes, arouse him, get him to talk. He was as stiff as the 100+ year old wainscotting around the room.
I was so mortified I asked if I could take a pause and have a glass of water and he said nothing. With his back turned to me for a good two minutes, I just gave-up. Told him it was me (it so wasn't! And I wanted it so bad!) gave him the full rate for 1 hour after 15 minutes and he left in 30 seconds
Sad story over, but now the dilemma: for a provider so well thought of on this forum and so well regarded, do I have any recourse? It was like trying to arouse an Easter Island monolith. He never offered once to do something, anything; or, make me comfortable or even try anything. It feels like I'm challenging the reputation of someone who has been exceptionally well received on these forums over years and I feel like it might come out petty if I were to say anything here (Or; god forbid, rent.men)
Do we let sleeping dogs lie after $350 for 15 minutes; or, should we be honest and say something (in the appropriate time/place)?
 

She devoted herself to social causes, human rights, social justice, and the needs of the elderly people! 
 

An escort friend of mine told me last week about being pulled aside at the airport back in April when he was on his way to Orlando for a porn industry event. He had actually deactivated his RM profile months previous and stopped escort work. He said they surmised that he had stopped escorting and that his story checked out but warned him to be careful.
By contrast, as a US citizen I have it easier than most. I cross the Peace Bridge (sometimes Lewiston) 15-20 times each way every year,  and I almost never get any hassle crossing by land. Been gently searched once or twice going into Canada over the past 4 years or so of frequent land crossing. But crossing into the Buffalo side, the officer usually just says hello, blinks a few times, ask me what I'm importing (I always declare super honestly, they like that haha) and waves me me on through.
(Detroit is a different story, but that was never related to my work, they're just total dicks there to gay people, people of colour, anyone they can bark at. Always take Pt Huron if you can, haha)
I'll note that, after 2 years waiting, I finally did my NEXUS interview last month. So now I'm just waiting on the card (any day now...) and also waiting for my citizenship stuff to go through in the next few months...  with those settled, I will feel even more secure. But for now I'm thinking over what precautions might I take given this increased scrutiny, and I will certainly keep an eye on this as it further unfolds.
I'm mostly just very grateful for having the wild privilege of having a US passport and therefore enjoyed pretty unfettered freedom of mobility compared to most of the world. Would be stupid to lose that by being careless somehow...

My personal alternative:

Danny/Dillon/EnglishKnight/KnightBoy is still actively trying to blackmail/extort money from people. 
I still have users of this forum message me directly for advice, one guy as recently as this weekend.
On Saturday I discovered the solicitor who has previously dealt with Danny so my advice has now changed to contact this solicitor...
Tim Thompson - Kangs Criminal Defence Solicitors | VAT & Tax Solicitors
WWW.KANGSSOLICITORS.CO.UK Tim is a Partner and the Head of the Tax Litigation Team at Kangs Solicitors. An experienced litigation solicitor, Tim...  
 

Happy birthday to one of my favorite posters! Those who love the Palm Springs Weekend will wish him the best, as he is the guy who helps @Oliver get there and back. 
Happy birthday @jawjateck

Thank you to those who served or are serving in our military. 

Vinny 
Tony 

Just one year ago today, my dear friend and travel companion, Epigonos, left us on his 82nd birthday.  He was gruff and garrulous with strong opinions, always vocal about where he stood on an issue, but the sweetest man, in disguise.  He was generous, kind and sentimental, always protective of those he loved.
Was it just a year ago?
 
I miss him.

This thread reminds me of sitting at the Thanksgiving table and having someone ask each of us at the table to say for what we are grateful.  The usual responses are the food, the company, good health or gratitude for many blessings in life without specification.  Soon enough, someone is stumped as to what to say or more likely how to say it and  that ends the chain as the guests start to clamor to get to the food.  
I always felt awkward at such times and I was always most grateful if the chain did not get around to me.  That was usually because I was fortunate enough to be one of those who truly have had so much for which to be grateful. I do not have an acquisitive nature.  I  set my expectations of my life in a way that I want for little and I get by with what I have.  That has always been the case.  
When I was younger, I had little and got by quite contentedly with cans or tomato soup and rice. Dinner was either a can a soup, a bowl of rice or a bowl of tomato rice soup.   I do recall being surprised  and disheartened when the price of a can of tomato soup went from ten cents a can to eleven cents a can.  I asked one of the employees of the store why that happened, and he explained to me that things change and not usually for the better, so I should get used to spending more, getting less and hoping for the best.  I decided that he was probably right and that rather than wishing it was not so, I should work hard and make sure that I was prepared no matter where life would take me,  I have found that this has served me well and for this lesson I am very grateful.    
I now am comfortable in my life.  This Thanksgiving, if I should be asked for what I am grateful, I will be able to say I am grateful to be free from the fear of hunger, and lack of shelter and for the good company I have on my travels through this life.  I am grateful for the great good fortune to have led a basically healthy life,  In addition, rather than to be stumped there, I will also be able to say I am grateful to have led a life a compassion and service.   I am grateful that I am able to help many around me who are in need and for whom a small increase in the price of every day staples is a battle rather than an inconvenience.  I am grateful that I have led a life I can look back upon with minimal regret and maximum delight.  I am grateful to have learned to look forward to the big picture rather than focusing on any temporary difficulty.  I am grateful to recognize how lucky I have been , for how well my life has worked out and for the opportunity to express my gratitude to any and all who wish to listen.  
I am grateful to The Rolling Stones, who perhaps express  it as well as any when they sing:   If you try some time, you just might find, you get what you need.  
 

I’m grateful that I’m  enjoying a fulfilling retirement. I remind myself every day how lucky I am to be  a 70 year old who lives a very nice, happy life. So many gay men of my generation died way too young; many before they were even 30 years old. I’m grateful I avoided an early death. I’m also thankful for my friend's whether we have been friends for sixty years or six months. Finally , I’m thankful for this website. 

I'm leaving this business behind and rejoining the professional world....
I won't be advertising any longer 
Best of luck to everyone
Feel free to send me a DM if you have any questions about my "retirement"

It is a question of consent. Just because I let you touch my butt or dick does not mean I give you consent to stick your dick into my butt.  Yes, you need actual consent every step of the way. 

I was repeatedly molested the summer I was 8 years old.
 
30 years later, I had a masseur that would always blow me at the end of our sessions. I loved it. I looked forward to it. I saw him probably 24 times over 3 years. It was great. He was great. 
 
At my last appointment, he raped me. I was on my stomach looking forward to my blow job when I rolled over.  He got on top of the table, spit on his dick and popped it in. I froze. I felt 8 years old again and trapped. It was awful. I didn’t give him any indication that I wanted penetration. We never spoke of it. I didn’t insinuate that I wanted it. There were no misinterpreted signals. He saw my bare ass and he took it. I couldn’t move. I had no idea what to do and just laid there. 
 
I agree that there is a rape culture in America.  I also believe that people find themselves in sexually charged situations and freeze. I think when you have a little bit of distance from the trauma, you realize that you weren’t giving consent.  I also think the regret is tied to the inaction. I was so mad at myself for not stopping him. I regretted not beating the shit out of him. 

If you listen to the podcast, it is clear the men didn't always feel like they could decline. Some were manipulated into having sex with the guy with no nose,  who was hired in the first place because in the early parties,  the guys wouldn't perform.  This to me suggests 1) guys went in not knowing what was expected of them and 2) the Abercrombie guys knew not all of this was by choice.  I get the feeling the well-paid recruiters obfuscated the truth to get guys to go.  When you have power ("these guys might get you a job") combined with a system that prevents communication (no one will talk to you), has guards in place watching the action,  people taking your passport only to return it after you comply,  and forcing you to sign an NDA while you are naked,  it suggests coercion, certainly systematic if not intentional on behalf of the Abercrombie guys. Further,  considering at least one man passed and was raped suggests he was drugged and not consenual. 
Ultimately, there should have been someone in this system to say to these guys,  "You are here to be sex objects. If you like unrestrained gay sex, this might be fun. But you will be meat for these guys; they don't care about who you are or what you want or need.  You are here for their sexual gratification, and your needs or wants will be sublimated to that.  You will never ever become a model out of this,  but you will get paid well. Everyone referring you to them is getting paid a handsome referral fee, and you will be paid handsomely too. The man who is the gatekeeper to this is getting paid most of all. He is going to have sex with you before referring you to them. He dosn't have a nose,  so if you are willing to have sex with him, they believe you will not balk at having sex with the Abercrombie guys. At anytime you are uncomfortable during the party,  one of those guards are there to look after your needs.  Talk to him,  and he will escort you out our assist you in feeling more comfortable."
Instead,  it was a systematic approach of misinformation to trick these guys into a scenario where they would be made to feel like they couldn't back out,  and sometimes,  they were told blatant lies,  agreed to under the guise that they might get lucrative modeling jobs that could change their lives.  

I was very sad to hear that @unicorn didnt feel welcomed enough to participate here and asked to have his account deleted. I like him and his man. 

The subtle slow seduction to get Danny to the Sunday pool party has taken several years and ultimately a public invitation with a signed contractual agreement.   He was just not ready to jump in the pool rather he was urged in one toe at a time.  

It saddens me to post this, but because of a "family obligation"I will not be able to attend the 2024 Gathering. Later today or tomorrow I will be cancelling my reservation at INNdulge.