JPFan4

I'm one of them! I enjoy tasting of the forbidden fruit lol. My first sexual encounter was in highschool with an upperclassmen who was kind of a bully. His girlfriend wouldn't have sex with him enough and refused to give head. He lived in my apartment complex and one summer i saw him a lot at the apartment swimming pool. I guess he saw me peeking at his bulge all the time and he knew i  was gay. Late one afternoon when the pool was empty he jumped in with me and casually grabbed my hand and placed it on his dick under the water. He invited me to a sleepover that night and man he used my mouth all night. 
And thus began my love affair with straight men who treated me like the slut that i am

I used to enjoy traveling to various cities (i.e., Barcelona, Prague, Warsaw, Berlin) to sample the local talent at a reasonable rate. I found the experiences rather mixed. Sometimes I would meet a really nice and hot guy and other times the interaction was just average, and the average experiences outnumbered the superlative ones. Though, sometimes the fun is actually in the chase (planning, logistics) , the thrill of meeting a stranger, getting knowing glances from others in the hotel,  and not the actual sexual encounter. 
Nowadays, for me, I’d rather spend my travel time in a place I really want to go to (i.e., for a museum exhibition or a concert) and if I get lucky with a local escort, then it would be a bonus. However, I wouldn’t solely select a vacation just for the sex. I recently enjoyed inviting my favorite/regular local guy (I’m in NYC) to travel with me. Just came back from a week in Puerto Vallarta with him. The sex (3 times a day) was more than I could ask for) and was fun exploring the environs and restaurants together. 

Welcome to the forum!!!
Anyone had experience to travel with providers/clients?
Yes, I have. You will probably get some variation in responses on this... but some believe you should have met with the provider beforehand for compatibility (temperament-wise and sexually). Also that you should aim for someone who is well reviewed here and other venues (i.e. Rentmen). Personally, I don't necessarily follow this train of thought, but that's another discussion (Search this site for overnight topics).
Of the guys I have travelled with, I have at least seen them for some extended period beforehand. I've gotten to know them well enough that I think traveling some place with them wouldn't be an issue. I want the trip to be something we're both interested in. I wouldn't want to go somewhere then realize we can't stand each other or are bored witless. If we seem to enjoy each other, not just in the bedroom, I'll feel at ease going anywhere with the provider. Also consider that some guys require alone time (for personal business, working out, etc.) for part of the day and some don't.
The provider I've seen most, he and I go almost yearly on an 8 day trip. Because we are extremely compatible (enjoy a lot of the same things in and outside the bedroom) he asks for a relatively low rate for the entire time. He'll even buy his own food sometimes and other things to keep overall costs lower on my end. Discuss with the provider your thoughts on what you have planned. Just because you like something like opera, doesn't mean the provider will enjoy it. You may be paying the guy for his time, but if he doesn't think he'll enjoy himself... he just might not go.
And what is a reasonable price for that? An overnight session is counted as 12 hours. Should I expect to double the overnight price as daily price? Or should be more considering it’s out of town? Or should be less because I afford all his travel cost and he also benefits from free travel as long as the destination is attractive?
This is where communication with the provider is necessary. You need to discuss his rate and what are the expectations with the trip. Each provider prices their time as they see fit. There are some guys who charge a huge rate for overnights or longer because it is a huge disruption to their normal schedule. They want to be sure they are properly compensated. Some guys may charge a lower rate because they enjoy the trips or enjoy the person. Don't try to speculate what the rate is. You may be able to get a lower rate per day if you talk it out, but don't assume it's a given.
Communication also applies to the hours. Most of my overnights have been 12 hours or more. I have seen providers say on this forum and other forums that they consider 6-8 hrs an overnight. So discuss with your potential provider their rate for overnights or multi-days. You might want to also ask how many hours they consider an overnight. Some guys will do a sliding scale or charge a cheaper rates for certain lengths of time or types of trips (i.e. cruises or trips abroad). Just for an overnight, I have met guys who have non-trip rates that ranged from 600 up to 1500. One guy I met a few years ago has a specific rate for my time with him. For an overnight, his rate is 1000... a weekend (whenever Friday to whenever Sunday), his rate is 2500... for 3 days, he only asked for 500 more (3000). We are planning a trip for 4 days this year. I was expecting to pony up 4k for 4 days, but nope... he asked for 500 more than his 3 day rate. We have a lot of fun together so overnights (and longer) with him have been a full 24 hrs a day or very nearly so.
Generally their rate doesn't include traveling and food costs. You'll have to add that to your overall costs. In addition, some guys are ok if you buy their tickets for them ahead of time, but some aren't. They'll prefer if you send them the cost of the ticket. This has more to do with their comfortability given out their personal info so you can get their ticket. Most of the guys I've hired and had to pay for travel were fine with disclosing personal info. I don't know if that's the norm.
The key, again, is don't assume what a providers rate is based on your assumptions. Talk to him.

My two worst experiences ever were in 2024.
1) provider A - very sexy guy - just like photos - huge cock - very muscly - however crummy apartment and couldn’t speak any English. Became very aggressive with me, trying to communicate something I couldn’t understand. He started to fuck me hard and I asked him to stop as I wasn’t enjoying it. He became angrier and demanded I relax or something like that. At this point I felt very intimidated. He resumed fucking me and he came quickly (I didn’t). Suddenly after this he became very friendly and asked me to leave a review. I said I would later - I just wanted to leave - but he took my phone and asked me to log in. Again I felt intimated and agreed, thinking I would write something quickly. But he ripped my phone from me, left his own review and blocked me.  I could see the review later when not logged in (otherwise I can’t as I was blocked). Of course he gave himself 5 stars. I felt very shaken.  Not to be OTT but it really gave me a taste of why victims don’t report things.  I just wanted it to be over (note I can’t find his profile any more)
2) provider 2 - hot photos, lots of friendly communication. Arrived outside fleabag hotel  for first meet - he didn’t answer his phone for an entire hour as I waited out the front. I gave up. Later I received a string of super apologetic messages - again friendly - said he fell asleep. Okay shit happens and I forgave him. Arrived for second meeting - exact same thing again.  At this point let’s just say it - I’m an idiot. But driven by my dick, I arrived for a third meeting. This time I met him. Very, very sketchy - a pale shadow of his photos. I guess he was on ice or something. But I’m kinda stuck again so I stay.  He asks me for the money and tells me to shower. While I’m in the horrible shower he disappears - as in completely gone - takes his stuff with him.  It dawned on me later that a) it wasn’t his hotel room or b) he checked out while I was in the shower.
I felt so incredibly stupid. I quickly booked another provider and met him. I was shaking and nearly cried in the guys arms.
These were awful experiences. Other than that I’d say it’s a mix of mediocre with the occasional awesome experience!

I remember having conversations with my therapist about this sort of thing years ago. I used to feel a sense of moral obligation to have nice conversations with men I wasn’t interested in, because I felt obligated to be kind and to consider how it might feel for others to feel rejected. I had a big heart, and I would spend all kinds of time stuck in reluctant pen-pal situations with guys who were always trying to prod me toward sex and their own gratification or validation. 
These days, I prioritize my own needs in those spaces. Grindr and all of the other apps are not spaces for community engagement. They exist for personal pleasure.

Age is just a number.  Attitude isn't.  Live life the way you want to.  My best friend passed at 83 from terminal cancer.  I moved in with him and helped for the last 10 months of his life.  He had more than the means to have professional help around the clock but choose not.  He preferred having a friendly face to say good morning and good night to each day and night.  I'm 55.  He was meeting with one of his regular hires up until the two weeks of his life.  Chemo and other cancer fighting drugs be damn.  Popped a Viagra if he felt he needed a boost.  I always knew when he was having company because he would call and ask what time I would be home from work.  He would tell me how much he enjoyed the massage and play time over dinner.  We ate, drank and laugh at his exploits.  I held his hand as he took his last breath.  It was sad losing him but I knew he had lived the life he wanted and on his terms.  A couple of nights before as we sat talking because he couldn't sleep, he had told me to not feel sorry for him.  I never have in all my 30+ years of being his friend.  His life celebration had over 300 people attend.  Billionaires, politicians, famous artists and normal people like me.  Multiple people gave eulogies because he had so many circles of friends.  I wrote several versions for my eulogy to him, some personal bits and laughs.  I ended up not using those to not offend anyone.  He went out with a bang!  Hoping to be so lucky when my time comes.  

Great question as I feel the same way sometimes. I'm 61 and short but height/weight proportionate. My negative thinking keeps me from reaching out to some providers, both escorts and masseurs, because I think they will not be interested and are tired of older clients. I tend to go with older providers in their 40s or 50s as a hedge against my thinking. That said I've had a couple providers reach out to me after the fact expressing interest in meeting up again. At first I thought they may simply be drumming up business but based on the follow-up experience I began to think that maybe they enjoyed our time together as well.  I'll still remain hesitant with younger providers but I may have to give one or two of them a try.
Also, thanks to all the other guys providing positive feedback. It actually helped me out as well.

When I used to hire, I only do weekends (Friday through Sunday/Monday) which tops out at $2000.  I think full expense where I’m already covering room, board and transportation it is a fair rate, any more is too much for me.  Overnight is not worth it to me, why pay someone to sleep for 6-8 of those hours?

Yes, twice.
First, I sought the services of a provider after my college boyfriend committed suicide. I lost my virginity to this provider. He knew it was my first time but didn’t know the story about my boyfriend. I can’t overstate how amazing this man was and the gift he gave me. Of course, I “fell in love” with him, thinking this older man was the solution to all my problems. I wanted to see him again, but he had the wherewithal and wisdom to say no. Instead, he gave me the greatest thing he could have ever given me—his friendship. Not just as an acquaintance, but a real, true friendship. This man helped me in ways I can’t describe, taught me things, and truly cared for me. He was right.
The second time was with a provider who quickly became a regular. It started as a comedy of errors—wrong hotel, giggles during sex, missed cues, shared laughs, and unexpected common interests. From the moment he walked in, this man made me feel at ease in seconds. He was insanely charming, funny, kind, and smart. Our sessions always went over—2 hours turned into several, several turned into overnights. He always looked uncomfortable taking my money. I’d leave it in an envelope on the stand, and he’d leave without taking it. I’d run out to hand it to him. Many times, he denied his fee, which left me feeling at odds and completely confused. When he refused his fee, I insisted it was his tip. I never had this problem before and wasn’t sure how to handle it.
One day, almost a year in and countless, deep conversations and personal stories later, he asked if I wanted to see a movie or have dinner if I wasn’t busy. I looked at him stunned. When I didn’t respond, he rattled off in his very funny, yet serious way other alternatives if I didn’t want to do that, like go on a museum tour, hop on the Staten Island Ferry and view the Statue of Liberty, or get a caricature drawing in Central Park. I laughed. I should have taken that opening to really understand what this was, but when he then said, “Let’s go, it’ll be fun. We’ll go as friends,” I thought, okay, friends. I said yes.
We ended up doing the caricature drawing in Central Park, followed by dinner. We went back to his apartment. We had sex, and when I say it was different, it was so different. When it was over, he looked at me. My heart was pounding. I knew in that moment I was in love with this man, but I didn’t say it out loud. I couldn’t speak. He didn’t say anything either. He just rested his forehead against mine, and we held each other in silence.
After that night, I made the fatal error once more of not speaking to him and asking what this was and expressing to him how I felt. Instead, I said my firm was having a summer retreat, and I’d like to bring him as my plus one. And that I’d pay him. He said I didn’t have to pay him, but I insisted. He agreed.
We went. It was the usual, obnoxious affair. Everyone was more interested in him than anything else. He was amazing. Charming as fuck. We separated a few times. I got pulled into different directions. He kept his eyes glued to me the entire time. I walked back up to him and said something I wish I could take back. I realized it the moment the words came out of my mouth. I said, “You fit right in. I knew you would. A lot of money to be made here. See anyone that catches your eye?”
He turned and looked at me like I punched him in the face. He was silent for a long time. He said, “Yeah, a few.”
When we got back to the hotel, I immediately apologized and said I never meant to hurt him. He was a proud man, deeply proud—his family had instilled that in him. His pride wasn’t just about self-respect—it was about being someone you could count on, someone who stood tall. I had wounded that pride, and I could see it in the way he held himself in that moment. I insulted him. And I hurt him. 
He said for someone so smart, I could be incredibly clueless. I apologized again. I told him I didn’t understand what was happening and didn’t want to lose this. He grabbed his bag, left the envelope I had given him on the bed, and right before he left, I’ll never forget it - he looked me in the eye and said: “I lied. There was one. Only one.”
Many lessons were drawn from that experience—about myself, my almost methodical business stance on these transactions.

Back on the original topic, in a review of the book An Honest Woman, a Memoir of Love and Sex Work, by female sex worker Charlotte Shane, I noted the following quote:  "...suggesting that it’s possible to feel a type of love for a person with whom intimacy is, at its base, a financial transaction — even if you don’t fully understand the extent of those feelings yourself." (Alexis Burling, San Francisco Chronicle, August 11, 2024. 
This struck a note with me...I do love my boys and have occasions where there is some mutuality, at least. But it's a love circumscribed by the financial transaction. And that's OK. I think part of the confusion is that we are limited in English to one word, love. The French, and a number of other cultures, have a greater selection of words to describe different kinds of love. 

If I may share my personal story with you all...
I started to work as an escort at the age of 19 a bit by accident. I was a student at an expensive private university who moonlighted in performing arts; I was approached one night by a man at the end of a show. I understood that somebody wanted to meet me but I did not expect the meeting to turn into this. I ended up spending an entire night in the suite with the boss of the guy who approached me in the ballroom. Although I really felt odd about getting paid for this ("what have I become?!"), I felt liberated, a bit like I had managed to get rid of something that was stifling me. It was the first time in my life that somebody was so complimental about me. When you are naked, you cannot cheat. It was a huge confidence booster for me. And earning money was such a great motivator.
I had my regular clients over 3 years. I am naturally somebody quite shy and conservative (sexually speaking) but doing this helped me pierce through my bubble. Then I stopped my moonlighting activity overnight when I met somebody.
Fast forward, years later. I had a job, I was in a stable relationship. Little by little, the spark was dying out; my work was so exhausting that I had reduced my couple and social life to the bare minimum. I was out there for a conference in a nice hotel in another country, waiting for my trip colleagues in the main hall to go out together for dinner. Then I spotted someone I am sure to be a male escort with his male client, meeting at the elevator - there are signs you cannot misinterpret. All my memories from my student years came up to the surface and I felt surprizingly great about it. I flew back home, thought it over.
I booked my first escort one month after, just to try it out. Just to see how it feels, just once. It was great! what i did not anticipate is that it helped me in my couple life as well. I was less cranky, less defensive. 
I am a regular client now. I feel lonely even if I am not alone, it is hard to explain. But escorting has definitely contributed to an improvement of my mental health.

I remember meeting an escort online who lived in a dorm not too far from the hotel I would stay in when I visited Manhattan (he was actually in walking distance to my hotel). He was a young, handsome, muscled 20-something who was a college student who had his first class at 9:30 on Monday mornings. He would get to my room around 6 am, and arrive in his 'pajamas', with his clothes in his back pack. I'd leave the door unlocked for him, and I'd stay in bed. He'd come in, and crawl into bed with me. Right away he'd get an erection, pull off his bottoms, and show me his 'morning wood' (as though he was sleeping next to me the whole night). I'd bottom him with my morning wood, while he'd shoot his load all over me. It was the perfect teacher / student fantasy we both got into.
When we were through, I'd order room service for breakfast while the two of us hit the shower and have more fun with each other. We'd have breakfast in bed, then he'd get dressed and go off to class (he was just as sexy dressed for the day). This went on for a couple of semesters, and I remember he was a film major. One of the hottest young men I ever met, and would book every time I was out there. I was sad when he told me he was done with school, and he was moving to LA to start a career in movies. (This was around 2018). I never stayed in touch with him, but I hope he's living his dream.

Can I ask you if it matters why is communications are infrequent?  Either the relationship between you isn't the same to him as it is to you or maybe he just doesn't do small talk.  Either way, he's not into communication between times together, so leave him alone until you're next ready to hire him.  Who knows, maybe he'll even reach out to you if you're silent for a while.   

Well, @HotelFun, that’s a great way to spend a few days, believe me. Many years ago, when living in Europe, I used to do 4-day binges in London. My menu was as follows: DAY 1, arrival in the afternoon, with a first guy for an overnight. DAY 2: Second guy would come late morning for a an hour+ rump, third one late afternoon for an evening and overnight date. DAY 3, Fourth guy late morning for a short session followed by a fifth guy early evening with a subsequent overnight. DAY 4, Sixth provider early afternoon for a couple of hours, and seventh guy late evening for an overnight. DAY 5, return home, sexually spent and with a much thinner wallet LOL   
I did this fun slutty package every 2-3 months, sometimes cutting it short to 3 days. And in case you are wondering, I was quite younger and I am primarily a bottom, so no hard-on concerns, and anal sex was not always on the list. Oh, the memories….
 

I had a very honest talk with a provider I’ve been seeing regularly.  I think it went  well.
Me: There have been things I wanted to say to you and ways I wanted to behave around you that I’m afraid might creep you out and turn you off.
Him:  I appreciate that regard and concern.  But you are free to speak and behave as openly and honestly as you are comfortable.  It does take alot to creep me out.  🤓 The only caveat I will offer is make sure you have firm understanding and control of your emotions.
Me:  I assure you, I know this is a fantasy.  A good one at that.
I promise you that I will never stalk you, I will not be the jealous possessive boyfriend. lol.
But in living out the fantasy,  I want to be able to say “I love you” and behave like I’m really “head over heels in love with you.”  I’m not saying the feeling is fake or real.  It is what it is… a fantasy.
Him: Feel free to be whoever and however you want to be  ☺️

I can remember four overnights over the course of my hiring history.  While they were all enjoyable, I’ve since come to the conclusion that I’m “wasting” funds on literally sleeping with a guy.  I would have loved it if the “sleeping” were figurative. Now what I do for overnights is 3-4 appointments with different guys over a 21 hour period.  First is upon check in at around 3pm.  Next is early evening between 6-8pm.  Third is late night around 11pm.  The last one is the next day just before check out.  It costs me about 1,000 to 1,500 total but it’s action packed.

If you had a 14 hour appointment, it sounds like it began at 7pm since he left at 9am the next day.  If that's the case, then you should have arranged to have a meal at either the beginning of your appointment or, if you were worried about one or both of you being clean enough for anal sexy, had sex right away (or maybe after one drink) and then gone out to eat.  In my experience an overnight appointment that truly is an extended appointment (not just hooking up from midnight to 6am or something) should include at least the evening meal if not breakfast.  So, if you did anything "wrong" other than starting out with an overnight instead of just an hour or two appointment, it's that you didn't factor in the need for the guy to eat dinner and instead spent hours drinking alcohol with him.  (I assume you were drinking for hours since you said he went out to get something to eat and came back at midnight, so unless he was absent for a long time then you probably were hanging out drinking and chatting for quite a while.)
I don't really get a sense that the escort did anything wrong other than maybe not guiding you into a more explicit conversation about how your appointment would be structured.  Since he knew you were new to this and he's apparently experienced, he should have raised some of these issues in advance (including the time in the morning he anticipated leaving) so you could have structured the time in a way that met more of your needs.  Therefore, I definitely don't think it would be appropriate for you to contact him to complain about his behavior other than maybe you wish he had helped you figure out some structure in advance.  It's more of a live and learn circumstance.
I'm interested in alternate perspectives.  Maybe some believe that the escort should have taken more control in the moment, guiding you to eating dinner instead of drinking when more dining establishments were open, and then initiated play in the morning early enough that you could enjoy it without feeling like the clock was ticking.  Maybe some will call into question the escort leaving to try to find food not once but twice (which does seem a bit odd to me).  Maybe some will even argue that the escort knew exactly what he was doing -- getting you to pay his fee in exchange for mostly time spent drinking and sleeping -- but for all we knew the escort actually believed that allowing you to set the pace was the best thing for you.
Assuming you decide to schedule another overnight at some point with him or anyone else, I suggest having more communication in advance to see if you are both on the same page as to what's going to happen during your time together.

When I look at profiles, I don't even look at the sexual orientation of the provider. If he's available, affordable, compatible with my needs and capable of performing as expected, I can't care less what he claims to be his sexual orientation.
Personally I've met people who prefer to hire bisexual or straight men. I try not to judge them, I just let them be, that is, until it affects me. Once in a setting that I prefer not to give details about, there were a group of gay men talking about a number of topics. There was this gay guy who apparently had a problem with other gay men, stating that the moment that he finds that a guy is gay he wants nothing to do with him. In the same paragraph where he said that he only dates straight men ("very macho" in his words), he then stated how lonely he is, and that he doesn't seem to find a man who loves him.
I just had to tell him, "Why on Earth do you want to pursue a person who, by the very definition of who he is, doesn't like you and is not interested in you that way?" His rather explosive, defensive, insulting and downright disrespectful reaction told me that he had no interest in challenging his premises, nor did he really had any legitimate interest in finding love. I know it would have been better if I just let him be, but it really rubbed me the wrong way that he had this attitude that "straight means better", or "gay is worthless". With that, I had a problem, but not with his preferences of what kind of man he prefers.
In my youth, in my early 20s, I was a very angry young man. I became a hardcore activist for the rights of gay men and for HIV/AIDS prevention education made available to all. I used to call myself "heterophobic", meaning that I was not very nice to those guys who were sometimes struggling with coming to terms with their sexuality, and they considered themselves straight or bisexual. I used to say that I respect their sexual orientation, but I will treat them the way I treat heterosexual men (which wasn't nice). I had a "straight means homophobic" and "bisexual means closet case" attitude. It cost some friendships, and took some learning and time for me to come around and be less angry/resentful at straight men in general, and becoming more welcoming and understanding.
So now I just live and let live (but don't fuck with me treating me like I am "less than" because I am gay).

Thank you!  This is extremely helpful!
The provider that I've seen regularly over the years had indicated to me that he doesn't have a long-term rate.  Your information allows me to make a reasonable and fair proposal. Let's hope he says yes!
Thanks again.