jackcali

I also like the younger guys and, while many of them are immature, scammers come in every age. I am guessing that he wanted the cash for the Uber because he wasn't going to take an Uber but would travel to you another way (e.g., by public transportation or a cheaper car service). Sending the money to a 'friend' could be because he doesn't have a bank account, but it complicates the negotiation and raises suspicions, which you don't want to do when making a sale. You were kind to go along with it as far as you did, but if his request was really about transportation, he'd have just taken your offer to get him an Uber. It was him trying to grab for just a little more money that made it all go south. Years ago, I hired a younger guy in LA for a one-hour session at my hotel (I was traveling for work), and we had so much fun I extended it for a second hour and then a third. I paid him three times his one-hour rate (I didn't ask for a multiple-hour discount) plus a very good tip and I told him that I was in town for the rest of the week and would love to see him again the next night. Shortly after he left, I got a call from the hotel garage saying that someone was trying to charge a parking fee to my room. Hotel garages are expensive, but the charge was maybe 3% of what I'd paid him or 10% of his tip. I rejected the charge and didn't contact him again. As much as I wanted to see him and as great as our time together was, his grabbing for a little more pissed me off so much the connection I felt with him was ruined.

I usually hire for an hour or two, which is enough activity for me, and I'm not an interesting enough conversationalist to fill the time of a longer session. I do love to cook though, and the idea of cooking and enjoying a nice dinner with an escort (with other activities before and after) sounds like my perfect multi-hour session. I'll have to keep an eye out for the opportunity.

While I'm super-discreet about hiring, I never considered this before, mostly because my communications with providers are through my burner phone. That being said, I like receiving a "thank you" text after a session, at least with a new hire. I'm sure it's just marketing, but it does reenforce any positive feeling I may have had from the session. After a session with a new hire, I decide whether the provider is someone I'd like to see regularly (most all of my hiring is of a regular). Some clearly fit in that category, some clearly don't, but for some I'm not sure so I consider going back for a second session to make up my mind. For those in the last category, a "thank you" could be enough to change the result in my thinking. With a regular hire, a "great seeing you again" text as opposed to a "thank you" text deepens the connection we've already established, though not getting a text afterwards isn't a big deal.

While there's variation in what escorts charge, that variation is not THAT wide. In NYC, where I usually hire, hourly rates are between $300 and $500, with $400 being the most common figure quoted. (Second hours or longer sessions are usually less per hour, etc.) Of course, there are the $1,000 an hour guys, who I don't even consider. But within the "normal" range, I'm insensitive to price and make a hiring decision based on looks, convenience (whether and where they can host), reviews, and vibe from the initial communications. In my experience, I never had a good session with a $300 guy that wouldn't have been just as good if he cost $500 and I've never had a bad session with a $500 guy that would have been any better if I'd only paid $300.

I also am amazed he left money on the table. If you enjoyed it and want to hire him again, discuss with him beforehand how you're happy to pay for the full two hours and would like him to stay even if the 'business' is done by then. Of course, it's always possible that there was something about the interaction that caused him to want to get out of the session early so much that he'd give up some compensation. In that case, he'll probably not agree to meet you again if you ask.

That's a great itinerary for an overnight, but at my age it would have to be an overnight in January at the North Pole because I'd need two weeks to get through all of that activity.

It certainly was not. Back then, $10 would get me and a date movie tickets and a meal at McDonalds or a diner, or it would buy two or three record albums. It would take six hours at my minimum wage job to earn that much. Getting blown for fifteen minutes was much easier work.

Ha. I think this happened a lot, certainly back then in a more closeted time. The first time the older guy (and by that I mean 40-ish) asked me, I was with friends so I brushed him off only to hear a bunch of other guys in the store joking because the older guy asked one of their friends too. I'm guessing he approached enough guys that I wasn't his only recruit or that I wasn't the only one to go back after the first time. I never did run into another of his boys, though. Now THAT would be the plot of a movie.

Oh, stop hating on the guy. I think there's a bigger market for prettycollegeguy's services than you think. I was even a provider of this service fifty-plus years ago. An older guy picked up the apparently straight teenager that I was (in a record store - remember those?), blew me to completion at his apartment, gave me $10 and told me to come back any time. I went back a number of times when I needed the cash or the relief. He never even suggested that we do anything else. Neither did I.

This is close to my behavior, but I'm even more cautious. Accurate stats are something the provider is entitled to know before agreeing to a session, but I use a burner phone and don't reveal my name or any other details until we meet. Then, if I feel comfortable, I'll share my real first name (which is a common one) and a few details about my life (the industry I work in, the part of town I live in, etc.) but I may fuzz up the latter details. And I'm happy to talk about my younger days or my interests or other information that doesn't reveal my identity. I've seen providers regularly for a couple of years without sharing any identifying information about myself. The reason I am so cautious about sharing this information is not because I think I can't trust the provider but because I can't KNOW that I can trust the provider. I worry about and overthink everything, so if a provider had what I think is too much identifying information about me, I would start to see them as a potential threat. That ruins the relationship from my perspective. I realize that that is all about me and not the provider and that it may border on the paranoid, but I live close to that border.

I agree, on both points, but Season 2 is still better than most TV series of the sort. Maybe we're more critical than we were on Season 1 because it's not new any longer. Or maybe it will ramp up as the season progresses. One note in this season that I think is false. The strained relationship between Dr. Robbie and Dr. Langdon (the recovered drug addict) seems completely inconsistent with Robbie's whole wise, all-knowing, all-accepting persona. After all, when he was found out, Langdon did exactly what Robbie told him to do, go to rehab, etc. While I could understand any other character being cold to Langdon, I don't understand how Saint Robbie could be.

I'm not a native, but I used to frequently travel there for work and I quickly learned that San Francisco just isn't THAT big a city. If there was a conference of any size in the Bay Area (like the Dreamforce conference or the old Oracle OpenWorld), hotels rooms in the city would become incredibly expensive if they could be found at all. The Super Bowl would cause the same availability crunch. That might make a visit too expensive a proposition for a traveling escort.

To be honest, I don't even know what it means when someone says they're straight. People these days have become so casual about sex that being "straight" is more of a lifestyle indicator than a sexual preference. To me, a straight guy is a guy who appears hetero in social interactions and who dates (or would like to date) women, but I know there's a good chance that he'd happily hook up with a hot guy or a gay buddy if he's horny or bored.

I think you answered your own question. You're an overthinker. I am a fellow overthinker. Sometimes with my regular provider (I'm only seeing him at the moment), he doesn't finish or I don't finish. After the first one of us finishes, it's not always easy to rev up again for the other. When that happens, I'm disappointed in the moment (whether it's me or him), but afterwards on reflection I always realize that I enjoyed the session and I was glad to see him. Whether one "finishes" isn't the sole indicator of a good session.

I LOVED Patriot when it came out ten years ago, and I enjoyed it just as much when I recently rewatched it. I will certainly watch this. Patriot was a comedy-drama, and I hope "DTF St Louis" has the same mix.

I'm still attracted to the same types as I was 15-20 years ago when I started hiring. However, back then hiring (in NYC) was $200 an hour or less and now it's closer to $400 an hour. After inflation, that may be the same amount of money, but back then I had a job and was at my peak earnings money so it was easy to take a risk on an interesting provider who didn't quite fit the profile or come recommended. Now that I'm retired and living on savings, I'm much more cautious about spending on a provider without good reviews or who varies from my preferred type(s). In terms of taste, though, I'm hiring the current crop of the guys I always hired.

I agree. The OP clearly wants to go forward. Yes, the hot guy stole from the OP, but the OP is considering a dating interaction rather than a business interaction. My suggestion is to forgive but not forget. Go forward with caution and see what happens. If after a date or two he's asking for some financial help, I'd tell him you've already done that once with him and cut contact. Or maybe he was in a desperate place at the time and did what he felt he had to do, but he's now put his life in order and is a better person. You won't know until you take the next step. And you did say he is hot.

An upvote on the ATM suggestion. I doubt there's a location in the US where you can't access ATMs with your bank card for a fee of a few dollars, for which you get the anonymity and non-trackability of cash payments. If there's a concern about the provider being stuck with all that cash, then multiple payments both before and after the trip (assuming you can hand him cash) is another way to avoid electronic transfers, if that's your concern. I've used Visa or Amex gift cards in the past, but I've had trouble finding a vendor who will sell for cash a prepaid with a large-enough balance. It must be possible, but I haven't done the legwork to find a source.

These are my rules as well, except I have a burner phone for my communications with providers. Email seems to be too difficult for many of them. Kids these days!

My go-to explanation is that he's from my employer's tech group and is helping me solve some problems with my remote access to the company network.

If selfies don't work for you (and I think they don't work for a lot of people), go for it. A professional photographer or even a good amateur will put you at ease and get pics that let your physical presence but also some of your character show through. However, do NOT have those photographs retouched in any significant way. Even using AI, a retouched photo doesn't have the same impact.

The multiple looks go further than just facial hair. Providers may have pics with both long and short hair, natural and dyed hair, shaved and hairy bodies, etc. Since they're being chosen (at least initially) largely due to their looks, if there's any indication of variety, I ask how they look currently. Once, I hired a Latino provider based on the pics in his ad and to my surprise he showed up with platinum blond hair (which was not in any of his pics. I have to say the look did not flatter him at all. He was a good hire and the session went just fine, but I didn't repeat because the look was too distracting for me.

Can I ask why you're considering these alternative payment methods if you're regularly using cash? I imagine if you're paying an escort for a week-long engagement, the cash may get a little burdensome, but apart from that I don't see any advantages of your other methods over cash. Thanks.

Yes, I see him regularly. Not sure about his ads, but I do know he is/was taking a week or so for travel during for the holidays. He (if not his ad) will be back soon.

This is a pathological version of what I was talking about in my earlier post. It's nice to think that escorts (or any other people) are reasonable, rational economic actors, but it's often not true. We're all subject to our emotions and often react in ways that are unreasonable or irrational. Without having years of knowledge about the relationship between two people, there's always a risk of blowback when you might create tension between them.