jackcali

Bumping again. His ad now says he's in Chicago.

I'm a talker by nature, so this would be a complete non-starter for me. On the other hand, years ago I saw a provider I really liked who couldn't manage even the most basic conversation. (It wasn't a language thing. English was his only language.) I found his attempts at conversation pathetic and annoying, but he was beautiful and the sex was amazing, so I learned not to talk at all. The unexpected upside was that the sex went longer - thinking about (not talking was like thinking about baseball scores in terms of delaying orgasm. Why I didn't adopt that as standard practice, I don't know. At my current age, I need good conversation to fill out the hour.

He posted a month or so ago on X that he was heading into his last final at nursing school. It could mean "last of the semester", but I took it to meet last ever. Maybe he's finished with school and intends to move on from escorting? I know there's been some darkness in his past (described in this and other threads on here), but I've seen him a few times since he got sober. He's a very sweet guy (and a great provider) and I wish him the best, whatever he chooses to do.

It's hardly the biggest issue with looking at a provider's ads, but I think that having too many pictures is distracting. When I look at a profile, I'd like to see the provider's physical features, so his face, his torso, his ass and his package. A couple of photos of each is more than sufficient. If he specializes in a fetish, then maybe a photo or two depicting that is useful. BUT, I don't need to see the provider's travel snapshots. Pics of him standing in front of the Eiffel Tower or the Golden Gate Bridge do nothing for me and do nothing for him, as they're midrange shots that don't really show the provider as clearly as a close-up. If I'm interested in a provider, I'll look through all his photos, but it can get boring. From the provider's perspective, I would think that he wants to get his value proposition across to the client faster than it takes for the client to scroll through 20 or 30 photos. A few photos that gives the viewer a good idea of the provider's physical characteristics is all that's necessary. Editing dozens of photos down to a handful of attention-grabbing ones would improve the ad's effectiveness.

I'm also interested. I'm a little curious, though, about 11 reviews in five months. It seems like a lot, though there are two or three reviewers who gave two reviews. Some, but not all, of the reviewers have reviewed several escorts. Also, some of the reviewers are new to RM in the last few months. Also, what really sets off my spidey sense is that many of the reviews read to me as written by people for whom American English is not their first language. I don't think I'd hire him without a recommendation from someone known on this forum.

I've probably shrunk in my old age, but for a long time I was exactly 5'9" and was fine telling people that, but I switched to saying I'm 5'10" after I kept meeting guys barely an inch taller than me who claimed to be six feet tall.

We live in a gig economy and it makes way more sense to hire people with the particular skills you need for the time you need them rather than someone who will be poor to middling at some (or all) of those skills. A friend once let a young gentleman live in his small garage apartment in exchange for a weekly escort experience and some occasional household chores (mostly grocery shopping and running errands). It worked well until it didn't, and then my friend had a difficult time getting rid of his tenant.

Yesterday, I was about to reach out to a traveling escort I was hoping to see today and found that he'd already changed cities, meaning he was in NYC for less than 48 hours. His travels are his travels and I'm sure he had his reasons for them, though I would think that NY is a GREAT market for traveling escorts. What I don't understand why so many escorts don't use the RM function to show travel plans. If I knew he was leaving yesterday or if I knew he was coming to NY before he got her), I might have accelerated my plans to see him. RM should give their escorts an online class about how to market themselves and manage their business. Not everyone is a natural.

Bumping because he's now visiting NYC. Any new info? Thanks.

THIS! Basically, every five-star rating system has been compressed to "five stars" or "shit". When I was still working and managing a large team of young professionals, any review less than "everything you did last year was spectacular" had the employee thinking they were going to be fired. If I intended to give some constructive criticism in a review, I brought a box of tissues with me into the conference room.

Thank you. You said it much better than I did.

Oh, my God. There may be an audience for what that website is selling, but I'm not part of it. It's so exploitative. I realize most porn is in one way or another, but I found the site very offputting.

I wouldn't obsess too much about what the escort thinks of your choice, though it should be reasonable. For a first-time meeting with an escort, I think the Spago treatment is completely out of line. After all, who knows if you'll like him (or him you). On the other hand, if it's a regular of years standing, a blowout dinner can be fun, but not because you're trying to impress the escort. Rather it's an acknowledgement of the depth of your relationship. For a more practical answer, when I host in a hotel, it's usually because I'm traveling on business, so I stay at relatively nice hotels. If I'm hiring specifically for the purpose, then any of the chain hotels are adequate. If I'm taking a new escort out to lunch or dinner, I wouldn't take him to a place I'd take a client but rather to a place I'd go with a co-worker or business friend, so someplace good but not pricey. That said, the best meal I ever had with an escort was takeout from In-N-Out Burger, mostly because it fueled an overnight of almost non-stop fucking. Oh, to be young(er) again!

Thank you for this story and the earlier one. It's enlightening to hear about your bad client interactions, which the passing of decades (and being out of the business) allows you to share. When I feel that I'm a boring or disappointing or ugly client, I take heart that I am very respectful and mannerly and don't insult or degrade escorts in any way. In fact, it astounds me that clients (other than fetishists) would. I'll hold my head a little higher the next time I see an escort.

Will you think less of me because I think that's hot?

I have NO knowledge of massage except as a recipient, but I imagine that a masseur has a routine for what's included in their therapeutic massage (or the therapeutic portion of their massage). After all, he does have a whole body to cover and doesn't want to miss an area. Of course, if you only care about the extras and not the massage, I can think of other solutions.

Thank you for your very kind words. I admit I may be exaggerating my ugliness. After all, I often handle newborn babies without them bursting into tears and I don't believe that clocks (back when those existed) ever stopped just because I looked at them. I have many admirable qualities, but being appealing to the eye has never been one of them, and that is something I knew well before I knew I was gay.

It's depressing to dwell on what goes on in an escort's head about our sessions. I'm fairly ugly, have always been, and now I'm old . . . and still fairly ugly. I assume that the escorts I meet agree with me on those points. As a result, I should be happy to be treated as another widget on the escort's assembly line as opposed to being treated as the old, ugly widget that I am. But what I really want, and what I most look for, is an escort who (if I don't think about it too much) can make me feel NOT like a widget or at least feel like a favorite or interesting widget. I know he's there only for the money, but having met clients in my line of work only for the money, I still had clients I enjoyed working with apart from the money I earned. If I get that from an escort, I'm a happy man.

Thanks, PA, for all the economic analysis on this thread, but I'm reminded of the economists' joke that the stock market has correctly predicted eleven of the last five recessions.

I'm sure that is right and is especially true in places like NYC (where I am), where the finance industry drives the economy.

I give pretty accurate stats in my RM profile and tell the provider that in the first communication. I am rarely asked for a pic, but when I am, I refuse. If I'm really, really, um, eager to see the provider, I might offer to meet him first on the street on the assumption that either of us can bail if he doesn't like what he sees. I've never had an RM escort ask for that. Pre-meetings are my standard procedure with guys from SA. They are generally looking for a longer-term arrangement (as am I) so personality is as much of a factor as looks, so a short meet over coffee lets us check out the other person and talk about what our arrangement will look like. It's a great icebreaker and has worked well for me over the years.

I hired him as an escort and was disappointed. DM for details.

I have a story about that, slightly off topic. A provider who I met in NY a few times moved to LA when I was traveling there regularly for work. The next time I was in LA, I met him at my hotel for an extended session. I had an amazing time, better even than our NY sessions, which I thought were pretty great. I paid his rate, gave him a very generous tip and decided I would try to see him two or three times on that trip and on all my future trips to LA. Ten minutes later I got a call from the hotel bellman saying a guy in the garage was trying to charge his parking to my room. I told the bellman I didn't know who it was. I guess the parking was expensive, but only a small fraction of the tip I gave him, and I felt so betrayed by the grift that I never saw him again. 😪

Thanks for this info. I am usually looking for daytimes, but the next time I need an evening spot, I'll check out midtown west/Chelsea. And good advice for everyone to watch out for the "resort fees" that hotels charge but that aren't quoted with the room price.

Not necessarily. My successful finds on Seeking have been equivalent to a relationship with a regular escort. We'd meet more or less weekly and spend a couple of hours together. However, the guys I targeted were managing to get along with their salaries but were looking for some extra spending money. I avoided guys who seemed desperate for money and those who thought I was going to marry or adopt them, but there were still plenty who were interested. Did the guys I meet have similar arrangements with other older guys? I didn't know and I didn't care. @Markmark's advice is good. Write them, tell them vaguely what you're looking for, see if they respond and take the conversation from there.