jackcali

I'm not a native, but I used to frequently travel there for work and I quickly learned that San Francisco just isn't THAT big a city. If there was a conference of any size in the Bay Area (like the Dreamforce conference or the old Oracle OpenWorld), hotels rooms in the city would become incredibly expensive if they could be found at all. The Super Bowl would cause the same availability crunch. That might make a visit too expensive a proposition for a traveling escort.

To be honest, I don't even know what it means when someone says they're straight. People these days have become so casual about sex that being "straight" is more of a lifestyle indicator than a sexual preference. To me, a straight guy is a guy who appears hetero in social interactions and who dates (or would like to date) women, but I know there's a good chance that he'd happily hook up with a hot guy or a gay buddy if he's horny or bored.

I think you answered your own question. You're an overthinker. I am a fellow overthinker. Sometimes with my regular provider (I'm only seeing him at the moment), he doesn't finish or I don't finish. After the first one of us finishes, it's not always easy to rev up again for the other. When that happens, I'm disappointed in the moment (whether it's me or him), but afterwards on reflection I always realize that I enjoyed the session and I was glad to see him. Whether one "finishes" isn't the sole indicator of a good session.

I LOVED Patriot when it came out ten years ago, and I enjoyed it just as much when I recently rewatched it. I will certainly watch this. Patriot was a comedy-drama, and I hope "DTF St Louis" has the same mix.

I'm still attracted to the same types as I was 15-20 years ago when I started hiring. However, back then hiring (in NYC) was $200 an hour or less and now it's closer to $400 an hour. After inflation, that may be the same amount of money, but back then I had a job and was at my peak earnings money so it was easy to take a risk on an interesting provider who didn't quite fit the profile or come recommended. Now that I'm retired and living on savings, I'm much more cautious about spending on a provider without good reviews or who varies from my preferred type(s). In terms of taste, though, I'm hiring the current crop of the guys I always hired.

I agree. The OP clearly wants to go forward. Yes, the hot guy stole from the OP, but the OP is considering a dating interaction rather than a business interaction. My suggestion is to forgive but not forget. Go forward with caution and see what happens. If after a date or two he's asking for some financial help, I'd tell him you've already done that once with him and cut contact. Or maybe he was in a desperate place at the time and did what he felt he had to do, but he's now put his life in order and is a better person. You won't know until you take the next step. And you did say he is hot.

An upvote on the ATM suggestion. I doubt there's a location in the US where you can't access ATMs with your bank card for a fee of a few dollars, for which you get the anonymity and non-trackability of cash payments. If there's a concern about the provider being stuck with all that cash, then multiple payments both before and after the trip (assuming you can hand him cash) is another way to avoid electronic transfers, if that's your concern. I've used Visa or Amex gift cards in the past, but I've had trouble finding a vendor who will sell for cash a prepaid with a large-enough balance. It must be possible, but I haven't done the legwork to find a source.

These are my rules as well, except I have a burner phone for my communications with providers. Email seems to be too difficult for many of them. Kids these days!

My go-to explanation is that he's from my employer's tech group and is helping me solve some problems with my remote access to the company network.

If selfies don't work for you (and I think they don't work for a lot of people), go for it. A professional photographer or even a good amateur will put you at ease and get pics that let your physical presence but also some of your character show through. However, do NOT have those photographs retouched in any significant way. Even using AI, a retouched photo doesn't have the same impact.

The multiple looks go further than just facial hair. Providers may have pics with both long and short hair, natural and dyed hair, shaved and hairy bodies, etc. Since they're being chosen (at least initially) largely due to their looks, if there's any indication of variety, I ask how they look currently. Once, I hired a Latino provider based on the pics in his ad and to my surprise he showed up with platinum blond hair (which was not in any of his pics. I have to say the look did not flatter him at all. He was a good hire and the session went just fine, but I didn't repeat because the look was too distracting for me.

Can I ask why you're considering these alternative payment methods if you're regularly using cash? I imagine if you're paying an escort for a week-long engagement, the cash may get a little burdensome, but apart from that I don't see any advantages of your other methods over cash. Thanks.

Yes, I see him regularly. Not sure about his ads, but I do know he is/was taking a week or so for travel during for the holidays. He (if not his ad) will be back soon.

This is a pathological version of what I was talking about in my earlier post. It's nice to think that escorts (or any other people) are reasonable, rational economic actors, but it's often not true. We're all subject to our emotions and often react in ways that are unreasonable or irrational. Without having years of knowledge about the relationship between two people, there's always a risk of blowback when you might create tension between them.

There is such a thing as professional jealousy. In my professional career, when a client of mine decided to hire a different professional for work that I thought I could do just as well, I got pissed off. Even if I admitted to myself that his new hire was better suited to that particular assignment, I still got pissed off. His decision affected my feelings toward the client and, at least as far as I was concerned, permanently altered the relationship.