DWnyc

Get used to more and more of that as time goes on … I recently had a provider ask if I was ok with filming. First time I’ve been asked in that context (have been asked in hookups a few times before).

It varies by provider. I’ve had many many offers of repeat sessions for a discount, usually I don’t take them up on it unless it is a repeat I would have seen anyway. I’ve also had people I decided not to go with initially after back and forth (maybe because of price, maybe not) who came back with lower price offers. Some have even added things like “I really need the business because …” either while trying to get me to book, or during the session. Reasons have included cash flow problems (rent or credit card due), sinister goings on (a guy chasing him for money owed), a crisis (parent sick, need to fly home and not work for a few weeks) or even happy reasons (made the money I needed to on this trip so now it’s just gravy) etc

Gay men also have higher incidence of eating disorders and key nutrient deficiency and that can play havoc with health as they get older (or is that something else gay men are less likely to do?)

Likewise for incidence of prejudice masked as preference … (expecting the eye roll emojis from the predictable regulars and warning note from moderators)

But if they restrict those matching “their own needs/tastes” in such a way that means they’re not making the margin they want, or are acting contra to their own stated policies, and reserving the right to be whimsical … there isn’t really much that can be done on the magic wand front to get them where they feel they should be.

And to add, most clients who expect the provider to host are incorporating the cost and effort of securing the venue into the rate agreed. So if the quoted rate is at what the client believes is market (including hosting costs) and there is then expectation for him to arrange a venue without a rate adjustment, the economics changes. I don’t know if hourly or cheap motels are an option in @Jarrod_Uncut’s geographies but in places like NYC and DC that’s a coin toss on who is absorbing $300+ for a last minute booking.

I don’t understand …. If you can host you will, if you can’t or decide selectively you don’t want to, you won’t. The localized market in your circumstances will respond accordingly, What else are we talking about here?

It’s one of the few areas where clients have the upper hand in this business. No one cares about a clients brand - if there’s a problem they can create a new profile, get a burner number etc and no one will be the wiser, harder for a provider where accumulated value is based on reputation, branding etc

To add to the list, a provider once said when I made a similar joke (back handed compliment) about how he was so good he was going to bankrupt me “baby, if you keep making jokes about my rates I’m going to start joking about your performance …” … ouch …

Nothing I guess. Plus you score a few more points on the member scorometer as a newbie as we react.

Be careful … sometimes this can be the prelude to requests for money, a place to crash for a few days etc Not always, but it can happen

Queens is the most diverse place on the planet … if it exists anywhere you’ll find it there! 😊

911 is obligated to come to you if you have need. a provider isn’t, it’s a negotiation.

I rarely make appointments other than the day of - and one of the big reasons is this, as it happened quite a few times (including a couple of forfeited deposits so that’s not the reason as far as I’m concerned). More frequent was when I reached out to confirm only then would they tell me they couldn’t make it anymore (so maybe they would have ghosted if I hadn’t?) I’ve even had ghosting when making an appointment 3-4 hours before the scheduled time - I call / text etc to confirm at every step of my journey to minimize time wasted in event that happens m.

I was just making a joke … don’t read too much into it. yes providers have complimented me on all the things you mention, frequently. Is it “sincere” however? As in did the person issuing the compliment genuinely feel what he expressed verbally (and non verbally 😊)? Who knows? more importantly, who cares? when you say “like it has happened to others” (ie they have received sincere compliments from providers and have reported back) - how can they, similarly, be sure that the compliments are “sincere”? If they seek that validation and feel like they received it, great. If they weren’t seeking it and it was a pleasant surprise, also great. and so forth and so forth. In this hobby we seek an experience made up of many components - and these can be very personal and differ from person to person. I personally don’t need to leave feeling like the provider has validated my looks or skills etc so I don’t put too much weight on all this.

If the question is about wanting anonymity with RM (ie they don’t get your details) one option is to use a cloaked credit card ( many card providers offer this) - so RM doesn’t get your details but it will still show up on your statement (so your ba k will see what you paid for)

There’s of course the other aspect. The industry is unregulated and in some geographies ambiguous legally. It is also by its nature very private and with stigma for both clients and providers (and kudos to those who don’t feel that way). So they are prepared to accept involuntary premiums / discounts and bad behavior as the price of discretion. This is one aspect that holds back natural market forces addressing over (or maybe under) pricing. RM reviews and discussion on this forum, while helpful, don’t count as meaningful regulation despite best intentions; participation is unrepresentative and with bias, and there is no enforcement ability.

Note to providers: if you want a raise, don’t provide the part of your service that lets your clients think they are great in bed … 😜 (nothing personal of course, I know nothing about you, but couldn’t resist)

I hope you are ok, particularly in terms of mental stress. I’d urge people on these types of matters to consult their doctors as first option. 24/7 assistance is available even if you don’t have insurance, doesn’t have to be your regular provider, and the hassle of seeking it out is better than acting on any incorrect or unqualified response from our community. And if you need any immediate prescriptions or treatment, no one here can provide that for you. After the fact guidance or sharing experiences can of course be welcome and helpful. What do the moderators think? I say this not to criticize the OP - but to ensure similar questions are never dealt with incorrectly - we are not medical professionals.

Make sure you confirm what he will and won’t do. Many “straight” providers (including this one, who I can speak of from experience) will be more selective about some services (eg kissing) sometimes based on the client, and sometimes they may not even offer provide at all, so not everything listed to ensure they show up in your searches is actually on the table. Best not to be disappointed and pay for the privilege of of having “straight entitlement” thrown at you (for the record, my experience was of trying to set something up with this particular provider, though I ended up not doing so because of some of these issues - happy to go into more by DM if anyone wants).

… and his profile is no longer available

To add to that … standard strategy applying to a lot of scenarios, if you feel you have a lot to lose (you may not, actually, in the big scheme of things) don’t reveal your insecurities; if your counterparty is “not a nice guy” you are handing him a weapon.

Well don’t assume everyone is desperate to be with him … I can’t be the only one turned off by attitude

I think there’s a perception among many that a masseur gets you an abridged escort experience (even if for the same session time) for less $. some masseurs volunteer themselves as top or bottom … unless they mean simulation I don’t see what that is other than saying they’re open to … everything. I’ve always assumed that means — it’s on offer but you have to discuss with me how ($) that may work

He had “white” in his profile name in several different incarnations (eg Bigwhitecock in this thread) which I always found a little odd. I looked at his profile once, never engaged, but since then he reached out every couple of months, often with a new name. He must have changed it again as the link above doesn’t work.