DWnyc

I’ve often suspected that the brashness, arrogance, almost over the top coolness some providers often demonstrate (sometimes parallel to fulfilling the fantasy of extreme passion and intimacy) - is a self defense mechanism to ward off clients who may start believing it … and maybe even to protect themselves from believing in the potential for something. Providers are human beings too - and there are plenty who enter the field because of some imbalance in their lives to begin with (note am not salting that applies to most of all)

And even then, I would caution ..,

I’ve found within a city there can be differences - eg Manhattan vs brooklyn, central London vs East London

Could be different rules for trusted partners who some film with vs someone new though

What does “ask me” even mean? Is it “I’m too embarrassed to say it here” or “if you don’t ask no one needs to know” or what? Just adds an extra layer of ambiguity - which some may find exciting - and some may do to maximize clients - but I think makes things more awkward.

It takes two - and if he is ok with bb and says “anything goes” he should be aware of a potential interpretation of that and if he had any boundaries around that he would speak up. Particularly as a provider. Not getting into judgement or blame - just speaking practically.

Do we know if the family needs help with any arrangements etc? Or have they suggested donations to any causes that may have been important to him?

Another thing to remember - we can leave trace of identity without realizing it - using the providers wifi, having Bluetooth devices that include our name that can be picked up on a pairing device if our settings allow etc - it’s often a matter of who is technically more savvy and actually wants to capture the info.

Well I never said he was good at it … 😝

I’m just chuckling at the leaps made here. Since I am apparently a midwesterner, Am I from the Midwest of Manhattan I wonder? Or the Midwest of where I was born and went to college neither of which were in this country? And somehow brother Arnie seems to know my bio better than I do myself …before we even get to the language used and references to Hitler etc. and that about sums up the credibility factor. The OP at least gets some revenues that he references in this post - where is our collective donation received for entertaining posters who get oxygen from this kind of deliberate baiting (and not the masterful kind).

Guys you do realize he gets off on this provocative behavior and the response that follows, and he knows full well it’s all nonsense.

Btw to my earlier point looking at the dates and the overlap in the opening language I’d be certain it’s the same person making the complaint from two separate accounts

And just to add if you see a cluster of bad reports about you (or anyone else) within a short period of time (often telling the same story, same writing style) that’s probably someone out to get you and posting from multiple free accounts to make the point, as I’ve said before here, this has happened to me multiple times and I’ve always managed to have them removed by pointing this out to the site but only by calling them proactively. Their due diligence on reporting isn’t great - something they have to work on for it to be more credible. Am curious how else it’s used and how the make sufficient revenue.

People do it on dating sites, when hiring / interviewing candidates for a job, when considering roommates etc If using information you have obtained through disclosure (eg a phone number) rather than by stalking / going through someone’s personal items etc - I don’t see anything wrong in it. what you do with it is of course where it can become problematic.

Not uncommon for some in the profession to have a background like that. Some will even talk about it. Which is why I don’t blame some providers for wishing anonymity or discretion - and they should therefore respect the same for clients even if driven by different reasons.

To be fair they’re trying to avoid people making the most out of the trial and never signing up again. But yes it is annoying how they put up barriers. I actually got a second Mr N subscription on a different number to check what my number looked like when others saw it (to confirm there wasn’t a complaint or description I was missing) - and canceled right after - was quite easy from memory.

Well that approach would certainly put an end to any further texts (or any contact of any sort) from me 😊

RIP I ran into him socially once (knew nothing about him at the time) where he told me about his comic books and about his work in the hobby to finance that. He had some strong (and important) opinions on the political aspects, protection for providers etc - clearly someone with a strong and empathetic social conscience. Just a few months ago I saw him on the subway at Grand Central. Hard to miss him given his physique but also his smile, towering above the commuter crowds. He was wearing a t-shirt saying “legalize sex work”. I was in two minds as to whether to waive and say hi as I thought he wouldn’t remember me and I was exhausted and feeling unsociable. He spotted me, however, and walked over and gave me a hug on a crowded train - asked how I was and said we should grab lunch, that he was traveling and he would be in touch when back in town. I remember feeling the warmth of his personality both times I met him. Condolences to everyone in his life.

Shouldn’t be - as that would kill the app’s business model

People can suggest names and I believe they have a verification process and then leave them up there if confirmed. Individuals who can prove they own the number can then have the name corrected or removed if they object to it being listed. One smart ass provider suddenly started calling me (let’s say) “ Brian” in his comms (berating me for not booking) - it’s not my name and I have n ever used it as an alias. I couldn’t figure out what was going on until I saw someone had suggested me as that name and it was listed in my report, so their verification doesn’t always work.

Agreed It seems like we’ve replaced the “sero sorting” divide with a new one. The thing is, whether providers or online hookups, strangers (who lecture) remaining strangers is not a problem. (I’ll add that I’ve received many a lecture on the topic from providers who otherwise apparently don’t have time for questions prior to booking)

Why would condoms be unsafe? we can debate whether condoms (without prep /ART) are less safe than prep/ART or whether condoms add anything to safety in conjunction … but what makes them unsafe independently?

Bottom line - providers and clients can and do stalk for a variety of unfortunate reasons. Likewise both groups can and do leave trails of complaints that - whether or not legitimate - can affect reputation. And whether or not the probability is high / material, there is greater than zero chance of legal trouble (not to mention personal / reputational damage) coming from publicity around engagement. So, instead of relying on all these proxies and beating around the bush - eg iPhone vs android, real phone number, deposit but not through anonymous apps, Uber me in your account, will only meet at client residence etc - why don’t people just say what they really mean: - I want to perform a background check on you before confirming our appointment - Unspoken but understood would be - if I have enough info on me to do that, I can come after you in any scenario For me this would be a deal breaker - but if others don’t mind they can oblige - and market forces being what they are, there will be plenty of providers at my comfort level and it won’t be a problem to miss out on those insisting on this. Hasn’t been so far.

For the providers here and elsewhere who talk of leverage they need to have and hence the client non burner number requirement, or how they look up MrNumber and maybe file complaints etc - have you actually looked up your own mr number entries? it can be painful - like googling onesself a but I’ve often seen some negative comments which are more explicit and less diplomatic than reviews on this site

Oh @arnemgreeves you’re hardly a stranger anymore 😉