LookingAround

19 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

So is that one, or not ? Looks like it has tits.

I find this offensive. Whether you were allegedly joking (which potentially makes it worse, sarcasm or not), this is remarkably transphobic. As a repeatedly self-proclaimed bisexual this is incredibly insensitive.  Stop dehumanizing someone by calling them “it.”

I’ve met him. Reluctantly agreed to sensual massage for me. 90 mins for $400. Good massage but not extraordinary. 
Several weeks later I asked about repeating and he said he wasn’t into doing sensual massage after thinking about it. 
Whatever. 

2 hours ago, Luv2play said:

And what makes you think so?. That I'm not well adjusted? I think I'll let the therapists work on people who need it more than I do.

At 76 I have three part time jobs, two volunteer and one paying a low stipend for a job I love and can be creative. I also write a biweekly newspaper column, for which I am paid.

I wake up each day with something fun and rewarding to do. I also have a wonderful pension that allows me to indulge in some hobbies. 

lol I never said I didn’t think you weren’t well adjusted. Those were your words. 

On 10/29/2022 at 7:37 PM, Luv2play said:

Maybe it helps me that I took an undergraduate degree in psychology and sociology. I then studied law and graduated with a degree in law. I acquired a lot of theoretical and practical knowledge of human behaviour. Along the way I learned a lot about myself as well. 

Society was undergoing incredible changes in the 1960's when I was in school and university. I was undergoing changes in myself and learning to live with being gay in a largely straight world. 

I managed to survive and I would say thrive in those times despite the difficulties of fitting in. Having friends, family and colleagues and some lovers along the way gave me great support. I also tried to be nice to people along the way. You get back what you give. 

I never felt the need for therapy. Having gay family doctors at crucial times in my life helped. I consider myself lucky but I also made good decisions for myself as well. Like avoiding drugs, too much alcohol and other self destructive behaviour. 

With (the greatest of) respect you’re exactly the type of person who needs therapy. (Like the most). 

On 9/8/2023 at 8:08 PM, purplekow said:

In reality PCP is way of naming a primary care provider not a medical doctor.  This abbreviation, to my mind, has diminished doctor, as if they wanted to name a doctor they could have used the abbreviation PMD, Primary Medical Doctor.  PCP suggests equivalency of a Medical Doctor, a Nurse Practitioner, a Physician Assistant and several other professions which have their own niche.  If one chooses to use those non-physicians as a primary care provider that should be a conscious decision but by grouping all of these together it clouds the actual educational qualifications of the person you are selecting.  Granted on most identifying data, a series of initials after the name will give the educational information to those in the know,  However, there are certainly many who do not know the difference among MD FACP, DO, CNP, PA.   Or between a resident and an intern and a fellow.  

Have you been to an emergency room and had the provider introduce themselves by their first name.  

Nowadays, it seems prudent to ask what level of practitioner you are encountering.  I mean, even Dr. Pepper tries to pass himself off as a doctor saying he is a Fizz-ician,.  

PCP on my book refers to Primary Care Physician and is a medical doctor. 

I also found it easy. 

David Lessman MD

(212) 857-4524

I’ve met a guy on IG. I forget what word I used but I thought it was meet—as in do you ever meet guys for private meetings but maybe I used a different word. He said yes then gave me his phone number and asked me to text him there which I did and we made an arrangement. 

This is a well known abbreviation for medical doctor offering general medical care. More well known I dare say than phencyclidine. Not sure why anyone would go to a drug reference before doctor in a Men’s Health forum unless your mind is oriented toward drugs hahaha. Odd. 

I assumed he meant primary Care provider especially since it’s under “men’s health.” Never occurred to me what you thought of haha. 

4 hours ago, BiDude420 said:

Oh god this is the attitude I hate in the gay community. It is one thing to fuck bare it is another thing to convince yourself it is actually the safer/better option. PrEP is great but using a condom is always going to make sex safer regardless of the circumstances. 

Apretude only protects against one STD. Condoms protect against multiple STDs and don't carry the risk of liver damage or diarrhea. Not everyone can take PrEP either. Sure HIV infections are going down but every other STD infection rate is spiking in the gay community. Condoms are not "unsafe."

Everyone has their own risk tolerance and I respect that but I can't stand this holier than thou attitude in the gay community about this. I've gotten too many lectures about "safety" from strangers on Grindr after I told them I didn't want to fuck raw. Like get over it lol.

Such a specious argument. To follow your logic, do you wear a mask when you fuck? Because the risk of COVID is real and 11% of those who get COVID get Long COVID. What do you make of that?

I shouldn’t have said unsafe. I meant to say less safe and prep most safe. 

In the gay community I know, condom utilization is close to zero. 

Reading this thread I kept looking to see what year it was being written in. Like 2008?

Gentlemen, it’s 2023. Have you heard of Descovy or Apretude?

I consider condoms unsafe and Apretude as safer sex. 

I’m on Apretude (the shot).  Anyone else on it?

9 hours ago, jessmapex said:

How can a homosexual be homophobic? It's my first hand experience as a proud homosexual. I wanted to say it as a word of caution to people spending $$$ in search of love in unlikely places in response to the OP. Gosh queens are so judgemental these days! 🙄

Lol. The same way a black person can be racist.  There are a ton of homophobic gay people. The fact you ask the questions shows your blind spot. 

Such a sad, unfortunate bunch of untruths. I can point to many married gay friends (male/male) who have been married till death. Sorry you have this perspective but it’s not fact for everyone as you mistakenly seem to believe. 
Sorry to say it but there’s just so much rampant homophobia in this message board and it is reflected in the post above. I have to call it out and try to exorcise it. 

Mr. Number was not developed by an escort. Where did you get that idea? 😂😂😂

It depends on the country. If you can, get twin or double beds. If not a king is ok in the countries you mention but it can be dicey in Egypt. In Saudi Arabi it is unthinkable. 

I can’t tell you the number of Grindr guys I’ve thrown out (who’ve not taken the hint that it’s time to leave) lol I kept giving one hints and finally I said “you need to learn how to be a good guest. It’s time to leave!”

Regarding the two posts above who are “bragging” (my word) of their Sniffies and online conquests (not referencing Coolwave) none of my friends who regularly hookup easily via these apps would even think to come on here and post about it. I mean why would they?

By now KensingtonHomo has had enough time to have written more. Since he hasn’t I’m drawing my own somewhat negative connotation. Each of you can draw your own conclusion. 

I hired him at least 20 years ago. Many of the same pics. He was very professional and a good escort back then. Let us know what he looks like now. 

Thanks for the report 

12 hours ago, nycdaveed said:

Sharing some insights below to elucidate a couple of blindspots in our discussion so far:

1. There is a spectrum of attitudes and practices around drug-use among providers. 
The PNP designation can refer to personal use, but it can also refer to the acceptability of client use or availability of PNP drugs. The concordance of these three isn't 1:1:1 -- it can be a mixed bag out there (Ex: There are escorts who do not use but are ok with clients using.)

Regardless, among gay male escorts, many are users -- either in their personal or work lives. This should not come as a surprise -- while there are some out there with endogenously high sex drives (in frequency and quantity of sex daily and nocturally-shifted circadian rhythms, it is just as easily replicated and probably more common as a secondary consequence of stimulant abuse).

Of the ones who use, some are more functional. And -- surprise -- you have likely had sessions with them while they were high, unbeknownst to you and what your charicature of drug use may be. And others are less functional -- these are easy to spot -- they are the canonical disorganized, emotionally labile, terminally tardy, and physically unpredictable horror stories we read about. 

2. PNP advertisements aren't the full story.
Some choose to advertise -- the benefit is that they net PNP clients, who often prefer longer sessions and are hence more lucrative. Or they get clients who are ok if they use or are high in-session. The risk is that they lose clients who adversely perceive any proximity of a provider to PNP.

At the same time, others refrain from advertising, helpful at retaining potential straight-edge clients. But the omission does not mean a provider does not partake. PNP may still be on-the-menu or even part of their daily use -- just not advertised. There are also other factors that might influence the decision to advertise or not -- for example, some may not want those in their social/personal lives to know of their use, and care less about the perception of potential clients. 

3. Among the providers who advertise as drug-free, not all actually are.
Some personally PNP, but do not like it for work. And some use the designation to justify tacking on a surcharge, if asked. I'll analogize this to the issue of condoms -- some "safe only" providers do bareback -- for more. 

All of this is to say -- please ask yourselves what is important to you? 
Is it a drug-free environment? A meth-free environment? Someone who doesn't have sex with drug-users? Someone who can pass as put-together? Someone not actively on drugs? Someone who never uses drugs? 

Then take the lead and express your preference to your potential provider and if its a dealbreaker.
The exchange is quick and easy, more explicit about one's true preferences, relies on fewer assumptions on language that can be vague/omitted, and avoids the need to ask providers what their practices are -- which can be perceived as judgmental and might not even be accurate.

Chemical dependence is an issue that weighs heavily in our community, and the little things we can do to mitigate its stigma will make it easier for those -- including many of the providers we patronize -- seek help. 

TLDR: Our patronage of this industry places us at most 1 degree away from those who may be struggling with chemical dependence. We can be better stewards of the industry and supportive of the providers we see by (1) taking the lead and expressing what our preferences are around drug use to potential providers and (2) refraining from the use of language that reinforces stigma, which might incentivize some to be dishonest in their disclosures and adds to the obstacle of seeking help if needed. 

So informed and on the mark. Marketing weighs heavily in how escorts advertise. Of course. 

8 hours ago, DrownedBoy said:

Being the John still is prosecuted in all cities where prostitution itself isn't (LA/Chicago/NYC).

I understand that some escorts are so popular that they get texted by a lot of people. But if I text someone with intent to hire and make clear I'm interested in hiring, I'd think escorts could at least respond with "I'm busy" instead of just ghosting me (if an escort ghosts me, I never text them again).

You’re mistaken. My comment stands.