Simon Suraci

On 5/29/2024 at 1:39 PM, KrisParr said:

Would I rehire? Yes, but I’d also advise being more truthful in advertising.

But would you have hired him in the first place had you seen more current photos?

The world may never know…

That’s horrible providers respond to you this way. Pervasive ignorance around disabilities makes life much harder.

I see clients with disabilities, both physical and neurodivergent. One of my regulars has cerebral palsy. Another is on the autism spectrum. One has parkinson’s disease. Some others use a wheelchair, cane, or other assistive devices for various conditions.

My studio is not 100% accessible by California standards, but I chose it in part because it has accessibility features. Everyone benefits because it makes things easier to use, whether you have a disability or not. My architect background informs so much of what I do! I like my disabled clients and want them to feel comfortable and welcome. Any provider worth your time will do the same.

Disabled clients want escort services and massages the same as everyone else. I see accommodating them no differently than accommodating other needs and preferences. I help them on and off the table, transferring to the shower, and getting dressed. Many times they don’t want help with things like getting dressed, as this is a way for them to maintain their autonomy. In that case I allow more time for them to do what they need to do, and remain patient while a client does tasks a little slower than others.

Andrew Gurza puts out a lot of interesting content around being gay and disabled. He talks frankly about sexuality and openly about hiring. Anyone interested in these topics might check out his podcast Disability After Dark.

Disabilities manifest in so many different ways. You don’t always know by looking at someone that they are disabled. My partner, for instance, suffers from many chronic conditions. I won’t get into it all of the medical specifics here, but basically he has physical limitations, like he can’t sit, stand, walk, or drive for long periods. No step ladders or anything requiring balance or significant coordination. No heavy lifting. He works half time from home because that’s the most he is able to do. He spends a lot of his time recovering from physical exertion, even from basic daily life activities when he pushes himself too hard. You would never tell by meeting him for a few minutes or passing by him in a grocery store. He started using a cane recently, so maybe you would see that, but he is embarrassed to use it outside our home. He’s only 43 years old.

We need more compassion and understanding toward one another. This work requires empathy, respect, and adaptability. We serve everyone. Online we focus so much on how different we are on the surface. At the end of the day, we’re all just people. People with people needs. I may not be saving the world, but approaching this work the way I do gives me a strong sense of purpose.

Good providers will not shun clients with disabilities. Try to shake off cruel commentary as best you can. Keep looking. We exist, and we care.

Overnights are different for everyone. You, the client, communicate what you want and what you expect. Your provider will propose a fee, a timeframe, and you go from there to land on a mutually agreeable arrangement.

Typical overnights are around 12 hours, sometimes a bit less, sometimes a bit more. Baseline: 9pm-9am. Maybe start earlier or end later. You negotiate and agree on expectations ahead of time in terms of duration, activities in bed, activities outside of bed, how much (if any) sleep you expect to get, sleeping arrangements, and the fee.

You might start early evening with dinner, maybe cocktails, or whatever relaxation activity floats your boat. See a movie, visit an art show, go to the beach, dance at a club, play video games, go shopping, whatever the client wants based on his interests. A lot of times it looks like a traditional nice dinner date. You talk, you flirt, you connect. Some of my clients like me to give them a massage, body scrub, and manscaping in addition to, or instead of, meals or other going out activities. It can look however you want. 

Then the really fun part. Usually one or more rounds of sexual activities you like, often going into the wee hours. It could last from 2-4 hours, maybe more, depending on a few factors. You might break these romps up with snacks, laying in one another’s arms, talking, watching a show, or what have you. For some of you kinky bitches, these can be pretty long, drawn out, and elaborate sessions. Maybe others join (arranged ahead), but usually just 1:1. 

Then some sleep. Perhaps only a few hours. Maybe 6-8 if the client is satisfied with plenty of action the night before and the morning after. You might like to sleep cuddled up with your provider. Or in an adjacent hotel bed, or in completely separate rooms at your home, or whatever works best for you both.

Some clients want and expect their provider to stay up all night. That’s ok too, but please do communicate your expectations up front. Most of us can’t go for 5-10 hours at a time just having sex, and not everyone will be good company staying up that late. There’s a natural limit. Drugs are another matter, however. If you want to party, be sure to find a compatible provider and be upfront with your expectations. 

After some nap time, you might wake up to your man initiating another round of sex. Morning wood is raging. Things happen. Then coffee/tea, breakfast, more chatter, showering, and getting dressed. Maybe you skip breakfast and go out for brunch.

Pay your provider, and he’s on his way!

He advertises with a pro profile on A4A, although does not indicate massage, more like RentMen services. Lists his age there as 37, also: Bi, Vers, HIV-, BB, on PreP. He’s also an EmScuplt tech (a type of body contouring).

On 5/26/2024 at 6:06 AM, José Soplanucas said:

I make clear that I only expect to show our faces during the VC.

I offer to schedule free phone and video consultations for clients seriously considering hiring me. I try to make it clear that we’re not having phone sex or a nude jerk-off cam show on the house. These calls are useful and efficient for me to get a feel for what the client wants and mostly for the client to verify I’m a good fit for their needs.

Consultations inspire confidence and mutual trust. As long as the client is respectful toward me and the boundaries of this type of call, everything works out pretty well. I don’t particularly care what the client sounds like or looks like, but it’s nice to establish some rapports. Chemistry and mutual understanding matter more.

Brant mentioned he is on these apps. PM me if you have questions about him.

I know Brant. We now offer 4-hand massage services together, we’ve traded massages and I hired him years ago for massage as well. PM me for any questions.

A few of my clients prefer me sweaty and musky. Some really get off on sniffing my pits. It’s not that uncommon or weird to me. I accommodate as best I can. The more notice the better.

I stayed for a few days at Island House last year, working trip, massage only. I was busy the entire time. Thing is, the trip cost so much between flights and lodging that I essentially broke even and wasted a few days neither vacationing nor turning much of a profit. The main pool and bar were fun to hang around though! Live and learn.

If anyone tries the Holy Services, please do let me know how it goes. Let’s hope if there is a priest involved, that it’s only consensual role play.

Yes

31 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

You can't give us a setup like this without knocking down the pins.

lol you picked the perfect Angelica Huston meme to tempt me, but…

I won’t name names. I don’t want to be another target for his crazy. If he comes up in a thread, I may share privately to warn a client considering hiring him.

I know of one provider who’s been around for a couple decades with several hundred 5-star reviews on RentMen. The length of time makes sense why he would have gathered so many, but when I inquired here on CoM about him, I learned in private messages that he is known to badger his clients into leaving positive reviews, and he harasses or even threatens them until they leave one (or remove a bad one). Presumably he gets RM to remove the bad ones anyway, perhaps anything less than 5-stars.

Nothing surprising here, but you would never be able to tell on the surface if he’s just really well regarded in the industry or if he is taking extreme measures to manufacture and maintain his reputation. It will catch up to him eventually. It always does.

Ask here for references and verifications both publicly and privately. What may not show up in public reviews will likely surface here. Reviews are just the tip of the iceberg. For every one good review, I have dozens of client appointments that went really well and in person the clients sing my praises, but you will never see their feedback in a review. 
 

6 hours ago, ThroatCummer said:

I have a 'client' profile on RM that has my stats, a couple of G/PG photos, my "intos", and some text of what I like and get into. It also shows the reviews I have left for other providers.

Why?  It helps to let them know I am serious and have hired before and I am not a time waster.

^YES. This. 

It’s really helpful to post info to your profile. It shows you are serious. You don’t need to post a photo or stats but those are nice and do give a sense that you are more serious. The basics of what you’re looking for are the most helpful. You may want different things at different times, with different providers, so that only goes so far. Be clear about what you want when you contact your provider.

Post your “intos” if you tend to have the same or similar range of interests in most of your encounters. For example, your kinks or fetishes, or kissing is really important to you, you like longer sessions with a dinner date, or you want to be dominated, or you are a strict bareback top, or what have you. The more you share, the more we get a sense of what you want, and we use that info to better serve you.

lol I have gags too.

I like it when my clients express their pleasure verbally. Moaning, groaning, whimpering, begging, shouting. It’s all good. My place is very private and I have no concerns about my neighbors. That’s one of many reasons I choose to rent a detached house for my studio space.

I get more turned on knowing my client is thoroughly enjoying himself, by whatever signals he sends me, and it becomes a feedback loop. I believe we all enjoy our physical sensations more when we express ourselves verbally. Not just in sex, but especially in sex.

1 hour ago, Thique said:

To me it means being sensual, passionate, sweet. Lots of touching, slowly undressing each other. Looking each other in the eyes. Passionate kissing. Getting into it, or pretend that you’re into it.

Checking in to ask if you’re enjoying it, if you’re ok, or if you would like to change anything (faster, slower, deeper, harder etc…). And of course, cuddling and lying in his arms afterwards.

^I love this. It’s my go-to approach unless the client indicates he wants something different, either verbally or non-verbally. I’m constantly reading his needs. And no, it’s not too much to expect or ask. 

53 minutes ago, mike carey said:

He was at the Palm Springs gathering last month, and he is indeed a lovely guy.

I agree. I chatted with him in PS last month. He and his client were staying a couple doors down. He’s sexy! 😉 

1 hour ago, Boaxxx said:

am not looking for some positive reinforcement on my looks.

Very good. You’re sending a photo and/or stats for the right reasons, then.

I had an overnight recently for a trusted longtime client. He flew in around 9:30pm and I picked him up at the airport. I arranged for a third to join us for about an hour to start. We got the third off to the client’s satisfaction and he left. Then the client and I f*cked like rabbits into the wee hours, taking a break for some massage time between sessions, and had a long, hot (in every sense) shower together.

We finally went to sleep at 3am and we had to get up at 5am so I could drop him back off at the airport for his early morning flight. It was a cuddly 2-hr nap, really. I woke him up by giving him oral to completion and served him a continental breakfast, including organic duck eggs from my farm. He was happy. The crazy travel schedule was his idea, by the way, to squeeze between his other life and work obligations.

I took the day off to recover. I slept from late morning into the mid afternoon and went to bed at my normal bedtime later that night. I turned down clients. That cost me money, but it was necessary for me to make the overnight happen. I also couldn’t in good conscience offer a massage to a client when I knew I wouldn’t be able to give my best. Therefore the compensation at least partially offsets my opportunity costs for the day after.

I charged my client $1,500 and he tipped $100. 

My calculus is thus: roughly (5+) hours of service/action (outside the 2-hr “nap”) which I would normally charge up to $1k for, depending on how you dice it. Then there’s the extra couple hours of action/service in the morning I again might have charged between $300-$500 for if it wasn’t an overnight. Plus the courtesy of coordinating the other guy joining. Then there’s the missed work the rest of the day, the hassle of interrupting my sleeping patterns and my general dislike/irritation of sleeping with anyone. Plus the stamina I had to bring and maintain for a long period, and deliver the goods over and over. BUT factor in it was slightly less time than a standard (12) hr overnight +/-. AND I really like and trust this client. We have a good history. We have a good time together. I want him to visit again.

Normally I would have charged $2k for a standard overnight for someone I know less or don’t know at all. Some people can be torturous, and not in a fun way. For him, for this set of circumstances, I charged $1,500. That was the sweet spot for both parties to be happy. He plans to visit again for another session like this soon.

A client might clutch his wallet at amounts from $1.5k-2k (or more) for an “overnight” lasting around 8hrs-12hrs ish, but the way I think through all the components, I believe the range I quote is a pretty reasonable ask. You get a lot of value for the cost. Money aside, overnights aren’t everybody’s cup of tea. For those with the ability and desire, however, it’s really worth the price of admission - particularly with a provider you really like, trust, and get along with.

God knows what this costs to hire a woman for something similar. Count your blessings, boys.

3 hours ago, KensingtonHomo said:

Same here. I think it's odd to expect anyone to show up at your door or let you into their home sight unseen. 

I don’t think so. Clients hire us for privacy, relative anonymity, and for us to not care what the client looks like but to service him anyway. That’s part of the inherent value of hiring; not having to appeal to another person’s tastes and preferences, particularly with regard to the way you look. This dynamic may be weird in other contexts but totally normal for this one. We providers are used to it. 

Imperfect as the comparison may be, I might hire a therapist in some small part based on the way they look in their photos. Are they inviting, compassionate, and open, or closed, judgmental, and creepy? They have never seen me before but I hire their services and show up sight unseen, and their job is to help me with some rather personal, emotional, and intimate aspects of my life. In that limited way, hiring a therapist is somewhat adjacent to hiring a provider. I can’t imagine feeling compelled to send my therapist a photo of myself before our first meeting. 

Sending a photo is a nice courtesy, and I welcome it, mostly just to help me remember the client better and to add to their contact as a quick reference along with my notes. 

More often than not a client expects us to offer some commentary or react to the way they look. He wants validation, but there is no good way for us to give it to him. No matter what we say, we can’t win:

1) We say something positive. You assume we’re not genuine.

2) We say something positive. You believe we are genuine. You might conclude we lack professionalism because we’re meeting with you for the wrong reasons.

3) We say something vague, neutral, or even negative about the way you look. You assume the worst about us and how the meeting will go. Perhaps you cancel because of it.

So…that leaves only one reasonable option: say nothing about the way the client looks. Consider this when you send a photo. Expect your provider to say nothing. When he says nothing, would you still want to send it? If yes, you’re sending for the right reason. Conversely, are you feeling disappointed that your provider does not comment on your looks? Then you’re sending photos for the wrong reasons.

Our work is very different from other businesses in many respects, and the client is hiring us based on many factors, including in large part based on the way we look, both above and below the neck. This business has unique norms and expectations on both sides of hiring, but it’s a business nonetheless. I don’t find seeing clients sight unseen to be at all weird given the specific context.

This topic brings to mind hookups and how different they are to hiring. Yet even there, context matters. Looks are very important for most hookup situations, or even a date. You need mutual interest and attraction for both parties to agree to meet. Not always though. I suppose it depends on what you want. “I’m ass up, face down, in a dark/dim room and I want your anonymous load. Come in through my unlocked door at: [insert location and other details here].” Sometimes what the other person looks like is immaterial. Meeting sight unseen is not weird in a context like this one.

24 minutes ago, Trick said:

I live in a provider wasteland, I can’t be choosy.😜

Fair enough. Take what you can get!

I’m one of the InnDulge whores…

Nicely run, well kept. Not cheap, but less than Hacienda, and Hacienda is quite nice and you pay for it. As always, clothing is optional, meaning you don’t have to be nude all the time for it to be enjoyable. It’s quite a social atmosphere and easy to get into friendly conversations with other guests, both naked and clothed alike.

No, I have no expectations, other than the client is of legal age, consents, and pays me for my time. That goes for incalls or outcalls, and 95% of the time I have no idea what the client looks like before our first meeting.

My youngest is 19 and my oldest is 91. All different races, body types, personalities, and abilities. They have different preferences and different needs. It really could be anyone. That said, client age falls on what I like to think of as a bell curve. I describe it in this thread:

On 5/13/2024 at 2:16 PM, Trick said:

Masseurs without tables should invest in something like this.  It could easily be covered with a hotel towel.

Or…invest in hiring a masseur who provides a real, purpose built, high quality, full size massage table for you - a sign he takes his job seriously.

On 5/16/2024 at 10:25 PM, Capitano said:

Well, if masseurs paying for hotel accommodations can stick with sensible rates, I don't see why AirBnB would be any different.

I agree. I charge my regular rates when I travel and do just fine. I rent reasonably priced AirBnBs, perhaps costing in the range of one massage session per day, sometimes less. The high volume I do when I travel makes up for the extra costs like renting a house or hotel. Not sure why this would be any different, unless he’s only seeing one or two clients a day.