Conundrum

[Mark_fl]

2 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

My approach is to never ever discount. It reduces your value, it makes the client think less of you.

If you’re looking for say $50 off are you really not able to afford the $300? 

I disagree about the client thinking less of you. Recently I had a nice massage at a fair, but little higher rate than I liked.

When returning, I asked about the cost for a little extra, and was given a rate I'm not comfortable spending. Honestly I'd rather have 2 massages instead, and said I'd stick with just the massage. He then offered me a little discount for the add-ons I wanted. 

Maybe he needed a little money to travel with.  Maybe he liked me. Maybe he just thought I would pay the first rate, but I thought it was great that he did that for me, and we had a great session. I couldn't recommend him more highly,  and now that I know what that session was like, I may very well opt for it again at his original price. I think much more of him than if he simply said, good luck.

[+ SirBillybob]

36 minutes ago, Mark_fl said:

I disagree about the client thinking less of you. Recently I had a nice massage at a fair, but little higher rate than I liked.

When returning, I asked about the cost for a little extra, and was given a rate I'm not comfortable spending. Honestly I'd rather have 2 massages instead, and said I'd stick with just the massage. He then offered me a little discount for the add-ons I wanted. 

Maybe he needed a little money to travel with.  Maybe he liked me. Maybe he just thought I would pay the first rate, but I thought it was great that he did that for me, and we had a great session. I couldn't recommend him more highly,  and now that I know what that session was like, I may very well opt for it again at his original price. I think much more of him than if he simply said, good luck.

Your post is a very sensible contribution to the thread. A budget preference isn’t a referendum on anyone’s value, and a provider making a discretionary accommodation needn’t be one on his either. Through fair human interaction essentially dismantling the doctrine of ‘no discount ever ever, even if hell freezes over’, neither pushover nor bargain hunter labels need be assigned. Often simply knowing somebody empathizes with our reality and how we construct value in relation to desire encourages magnanimity. 

[+ JamesB]

3 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

These services aren’t cheap, it’s usually decent amounts $300 upwards. If you’re looking for say $50 off are you really not able to afford the $300? I’m sure that most of the time the clients seeking a discount can afford the full price but they just like the idea of getting a ‘deal’ because it puts them one up on the guy they’re hiring and on all the other clients. It’s just a game. 

I have to disagree with this take. First, let me say that I don't negotiate rates at all. Even when I decline an offer and the provider comes back with a discounted rate, or, even worse, the "How much you got?" response, the conversation is over for me.

That said, affordability and perceived value are two completely different things. Whether someone can afford a price has very little to do with whether they believe the service is worth that price. When someone decides that a price isn't right for them, it's usually about perceived value, not about playing games or trying to "one-up" the provider.

Here's a recent example from this week. I contacted a new masseur in my area who had no reviews and quoted me $260 for an hour. I passed.

Can I afford $260? Absolutely, that's not an issue. Do I think a new masseur with no reviews, who hasn't even put much effort into creating an appealing ad, is worth $260? Sorry, not to me.

That's not negotiating. It's simply deciding that the price doesn't match the value I perceive.

[nate_sf]

3 hours ago, SirBillybob said:

LOL, thanks hon! I’m especially touched that you commissioned an independent translation which broadly arrived at my intended meaning. Nothing quite warms the heart of a chatroom contributor like hostile peer review accidentally validating the abstract. 😏

No mistype; I’m all for taking on some risk without passive resignation. Others may benefit from same. My only note is that I’d have shared with your budbot the commercial sex work backdrop. 

Clod gets me! He really really gets me! Please may I have his number?🙏🥰

If AI can read and it’s algorithms are based on human language and the entirety of what has been historically ever written, then there’s hope for the rest of you, even if not coinofsewers [sic].

My apologies @SirBillybob, I did not mean to cause offense. Quite the opposite, I have been and continue to be impressed with your literary skills. I thought "Clod's" methodical line-by-line analysis was amusing so wanted to share, but yes poor Clod did not have the benefit of knowing the full commercial sex work context. I suppose he would have shown me the door had he known.

Escrow for escorts? I think you might be onto something... 😉