Tipping?

[guynyc]

Curious what the norms on tipping are for the various massage offerings are in NYC for 1) the asian massage places 2) private therapist if it's a guy you meet on one of the massage sites (masseurfinder) or 3) an escort. 

Mainly curious abt the massage storefronts where the massages are $65-$80/hour and a tip is not negotiated. Like is a standard 20% even on those or is it expected to give more if extras are given but not negotiated?  Bit of a newbie to those massage store places and the few times i thought I tipped well, the guys always gave looks of disappointment making the exit feel weird.  The other day, I have $25 tip for a $65 massage and felt like I got dirty looks. 

[56harrisond]

 

[pubic_assistance]

Break it down:
If you go to a massage place, the practitioner is getting only a portion of the fee.  Everyone knows that the $ 65 is a point of entry fee. So if you get more than a basic massage ( Happy ending, bj or more ) you're not really "tipping" you should be PAYING this guy for escort services.

If you go see a person  privately at his place, then he's getting the entire fee, and tipping is a sliding scale. If you got what you paid for and no added effort to provide exceptional service, the tip is optional. If you got excellent service, a tip, is like a restaurant for excellent service in the range of 20%.  If you got more than just a massage, then again you should be paying extra for extras. Same if the session turns to a full-on escort service. You paid for a massage not an ass-fucking. So you're no longer "tipping" you're paying extra for extras. So if the price was not discussed, use your observations of what a good fuck is going to cost you and add that to the price.

Simple.

[LACoaster]

Usually tip 20% on private at home masseur; 40-60% for the cheaper massage parlor depending on service.

[rhh33]

16 hours ago, LACoaster said:

Usually tip 20% on private at home masseur; 40-60% for the cheaper massage parlor depending on service.

IMHO 40-60% at a massage parlor is horrible.  I say minimum 100% for average service and up as the service is better.

[guynyc]

Oh wow. 40%-100% tip is the standard on the Asian massage storefronts? To me, that’s interesting mainly bc that can total an amount that might get you a real professional massage (possibly with a HE). 

[pubic_assistance]

On 3/26/2023 at 7:54 AM, rhh33 said:

IMHO 40-60% at a massage parlor is horrible.  I say minimum 100% for average service and up as the service is better.

If a massage place charges $ 65 and you get such a crappy massage that you feel you should only tip $ 30, then I am curious why you're going to a crappy place in the first place. Was any of that worth your $ 95  ???

Any decent massage is $ 120 to 150 these days.

So if the service was good, you give the place $ 65 for using their bed and the masseur $ 65 for doing the massage

[+ Lucky]

I would happily end the session with a 100% tip for a great spa massage.

Edited March 27, 2023 by Lucky

[Bluefin]

A thread about tipping … ground breaking. 

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

On 3/25/2023 at 8:21 AM, guynyc said:

Curious what the norms on tipping are for the various massage offerings are in NYC for 1) the asian massage places...

I tip the same at Asian establishments as I would an African or European massage establishment in NYC.

Seriously though... Any message establishment where the men are employees, I give them a tip for a good massage, plus a generous amount more for sexual services because sex is not part of a massage.  For independent providers, they are their own boss and set their own rates, so I pay them what they asked for, and sometimes more if they go out of their way to accommodate some special request.

Again, massage is not sex.  If you want sex, pay an escort his advertised price.

Edited March 27, 2023 by Vegas_nw1982

[guynyc]

21 minutes ago, Vegas_nw1982 said:

I tip the same at Asian establishments as I would an African or European massage establishment in NYC.

I know you were joking with the above tho I’ve never seen storefront massage places that are African or European. I wasn’t being specific to Asian ones specifically except for the fact I didn’t know others exist. 
and thanks for letting me know a recommended amount is “generous”. Helpful! 

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

2 minutes ago, guynyc said:

I know you were joking with the above tho I’ve never seen storefront massage places that are African or European. I wasn’t being specific to Asian ones specifically except for the fact I didn’t know others exist...

Here's one European massage establishment in Manhattan, I'm sure there are others:

Faina European Day Spa
(212) 245-6557
https://maps.app.goo.gl/oFvQt21aaHzdNXCm9

 

[Simon Suraci]

20 hours ago, Bluefin said:

A thread about tipping … ground breaking. 

Posting links to existing related posts: helpful.

Scrolling past something you’re uninterested in viewing: go for it!

Bemoaning someone using the forums for their intended purpose: not helpful.

[mike carey]

9 minutes ago, Simon Suraci said:

Posting links to existing related posts: helpful.

Scrolling past something you’re uninterested in viewing: go for it!

Bemoaning someone using the forums for their intended purpose: not helpful.

Simon! Stop posting things that make sense! You'll develop a reputation!! /s/

[Bluefin]

12 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Posting links to existing related posts: helpful.

Scrolling past something you’re uninterested in viewing: go for it!

Bemoaning someone using the forums for their intended purpose: not helpful.

It’s not that serious.

[Simon Suraci]

2 hours ago, Bluefin said:

It’s not that serious.

No, not at all 😊 

[x.adam123]

I have to say, I’m really surprised that people “tip” anything for private masseurs. How does it make any sense at all for a provider to be tipped if he’s receiving 100% of his self-determined fee? Tipping is supposed to exist for workers who only receiving a portion of the fee for their services, so I really want to push back on this a bit… if private providers want more money, they should just set higher fees, and there shouldn’t be any expectation of receiving a tip, right?

[+ FrankR]

3 hours ago, x.adam123 said:

I have to say, I’m really surprised that people “tip” anything for private masseurs. How does it make any sense at all for a provider to be tipped if he’s receiving 100% of his self-determined fee? Tipping is supposed to exist for workers who only receiving a portion of the fee for their services, so I really want to push back on this a bit… if private providers want more money, they should just set higher fees, and there shouldn’t be any expectation of receiving a tip, right?

You are free to do whatever you want. No one is forcing you to tip, right?  I choose to tip - I do so at my discretion. Isnt choice a beautiful thing? 

[Mustang]

6 hours ago, x.adam123 said:

I have to say, I’m really surprised that people “tip” anything for private masseurs. How does it make any sense at all for a provider to be tipped if he’s receiving 100% of his self-determined fee? Tipping is supposed to exist for workers who only receiving a portion of the fee for their services, so I really want to push back on this a bit… if private providers want more money, they should just set higher fees, and there shouldn’t be any expectation of receiving a tip, right?

Mostly agree. If the provider goes above and beyond I have no problem with compensating for that effort or consideration as I would anyone else in the service industry. In other words - gratuity. 

[pubic_assistance]

14 hours ago, x.adam123 said:

How does it make any sense at all for a provider to be tipped if he’s receiving 100% of his self-determined fee?

If you read the whole thread, this was discussed.

Yes, you are correct. The provider is receiving the whole fee so tipping is definitely optional.

BUT, American culture would dictate that IF that provider went out of his way to create a superior experience during the service, or provided ANY additional services that weren't a standard definition of either massage or escorting, then showing one's appreciation with a tip, is normal.

American culture was based on the idea that people are not slaves. There is an expected reward for going the extra mile.

 

 

[DavidShaw]

Tipping is the one thing that worries me about private providers. I found it so much easier in Berlin where I could just ask and be told a list of prices. Some of the NYC spas are nice because they seem to really like a tip of $40+ depending on extras. I worry if I go to a private place I will get shamed for not tipping enough.

[Capitano]

On 3/30/2023 at 7:42 AM, pubic_assistance said:

If you read the whole thread, this was discussed.

Yes, you are correct. The provider is receiving the whole fee so tipping is definitely optional.

BUT, American culture would dictate that IF that provider went out of his way to create a superior experience during the service, or provided ANY additional services that weren't a standard definition of either massage or escorting, then showing one's appreciation with a tip, is normal.

American culture was base'd on the idea that people are not slaves. There is an expected reward for going the extra mile.

 

 

We don't tip dentists, lawyers, and contractors, though. I think you are overgeneralizing "American culture." It's ok to tip those who appropriate the entire fee, but there's a qualitative difference vs those who are workers at a business owned by someone else.

[Capitano]

On 3/29/2023 at 8:37 PM, FrankR said:

You are free to do whatever you want. No one is forcing you to tip, right?  I choose to tip - I do so at my discretion. Isnt choice a beautiful thing? 

You are free to do whatever you want. No one is forcing you not to tip either. I choose to tip selectively and do so at my discretion. Isn't choice a beautiful thing? Diversity of opinions too.

[pubic_assistance]

20 hours ago, Capitano said:

We don't tip dentists, lawyers, and contractors

Dentists, Lawyers and Contractors are generally viewed as well-paid professionals. So correct, no one thinks of tipping them for service.

Masseurs aren't typically viewed as being in this category. You may find their fee to be high for the hour but many people forget that this isn't the kind of job where you're seeing clients all day/ every day

So that $ 250 for the hour may be the only hour he/she is paid for that day.

So tipping for this type of provider is ( in the United States ) fairly common.  Although as I stated previously, if the provider is taking the whole fee, you aren't technically obligated to tip for ordinary service.

Edited May 26 by pubic_assistance
spelling

[Capitano]

2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Dentists, Lawyers and Contractors are generally viewed as well-paid professionals. So correct, not one thinks of tipping them for service.

Masseurs aren't typically viewed as being in this category. You may find their fee to be high for the hour but many people forget that this isn't the kind of job where you're seeing clients all day/ every day

So that $ 250 for the hour may be the only hour he/she is paid for that day.

So tipping for this type of provider is ( in the United States ) fairly common.  Although as I stated previously, if the provider is taking the whole fee, you aren't technically obligated to tip for ordinary service.

Typically, people don't make $200 an hour, and that is far above a working person's average wage. At just 20 hours a week, that's easily over $180k a year, plus they get all that downtime to work out and do other things. Many professionals would envy that. At $250, their compensation begins to look outright extravagant and tipping makes even less sense.

Having said that, I WILL tip generously those who charge $160 or less IF they provide a good experience. I will hire at $200 an hour, more precisely 90 minutes for UNDER $300, if I see great reviews here but then the bar for a tip will be much higher.

And yes, if they can sell just one hour of their service a day, they should consider lowering the price or switching to another line of work. If they think of themselves as models and not masseurs, and that is the explanation for the high rate, I am so not interested in hiring in the first place.