Catching feelings for provider

[Raifish]

I’m kind of in a weird headspace lately, I think from the world ending, but I’ve had two great masseur and one escort service. Each of them I think I’ve developed feelings for and fantasize seeing romantically.

I’m in the wrong headspace to be paying people for sexual services I think right? I’m crazy seeking love and romance on rentmen and rentmasseur right? 

[Lazarus]

Been there. Done that. Don’t do it. Adopt a dog. 

[Guest]

It's a very human thing to catch feelings of some sort or another, and to have fantasies. It's not necessarily a problem to have them.  You've just got to be careful how you indulge those feelings and fantasies, when it comes to hiring. Don't make it weird with your guys, and most of all don't spend any money you can't really afford to. I've been on the other side of that and it wasn't much fun. 

1 hour ago, Raifish said:

I’m in the wrong headspace to be paying people for sexual services I think right? I’m crazy seeking love and romance on rentmen and rentmasseur right? 

If it's three in a row, then yeah, either it's your headspace or you have fantastic taste. Is that headspace wrong? Only if it leads to unhealthy hiring habits, in my opinion. You'll have to be your own judge of that. But yeah, don't expect to find anything closely resembling a conventional romantic partnership. 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

4 hours ago, Raifish said:

I’m kind of in a weird headspace lately, I think from the world ending, but I’ve had two great masseur and one escort service. Each of them I think I’ve developed feelings for and fantasize seeing romantically.

I’m in the wrong headspace to be paying people for sexual services I think right? I’m crazy seeking love and romance on rentmen and rentmasseur right? 

 

2 hours ago, Dante said:

Only if it leads to unhealthy hiring habits, in my opinion. You'll have to be your own judge of that. But yeah, don't expect to find anything closely resembling a conventional romantic partnership. 

In quote to the 2 together: I think the possibilities are there. It can and does happen. I had a client the other day recently tell me he was once in a “legacy” relationship. If that can work, then so can probably a client/escort arrangement.

I understand it shouldn’t be the goal to develop a traditional/conventional relationship going into things. But, I feel if there’s a connection that exists, why not. Even if it goes from hiring to friends with benefits to full on relationship. Maybe the situation can transition from a paid to a non-transactional arrangement. However: I feel the escort should have the initiation in doing that, not the client (because every escort knows the worst offer is a guy who alludes that he wants the service, but doesn’t FEEL a need to pay for it).
 

I actually think there’s nothing wrong with being open to love and romance on the platforms. RentMen is a very “fluid” website. It’s bad in some ways, but in other ways: there’s no “rules” or “guidelines”. Hell, without rates you could make it a free thing (but which is also why I started charging consultation fees/deposits to engage, because I feel people have treated RentMen TOO MUCH like a chat line, versus an actual escort service: which is technically not even a word broadcast on the site).

But point is, you want to date, date. There’s really nothing in the water to prevent romance from taking place, any less than using some crappy hookup app where most the users are ghosters or in open relationships. I have actually made good friends, clients and FWBs from RentMen. You may not get to “fall in love”, but you can appreciate a situation for what it is. Is the chemistry is mutual and there’s a desire to transition: by all means.

At the end of the day, I think most will just appreciate having a reliable regular. If business falls out the equation, that may feel like a bad move. 

 

Edited August 29, 2022 by Jarrod_Uncut

[+ nycman]

17 hours ago, Raifish said:

I’m in the wrong headspace to be paying people for sexual services I think right?

Right.

17 hours ago, Raifish said:

I’m crazy seeking love and romance on rentmen and rentmasseur right? 

Right.

It is the job of these men to make you feel this way. Nothing more. Nothing less.

It is your job to pay the bills and not fall for it. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Everything else leads to heartbreak. 

Edited August 29, 2022 by nycman

[Jamie21]

5 minutes ago, nycman said:

Right.

Right.

It is the job of these men to make you feel this way. Nothing more. Nothing less.

It is your job to pay the bills and not fall for it. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Everything else leads to heartbreak. 

That’s quite bleak and cynical. Also quite true. Find love elsewhere. 

I’ve seen it with some clients, they mistakenly believe that I’m present in the room with them for reasons other than they’re paying me. Honestly if I reciprocated with those feelings there would be no money involved. If you’re paying him, that’s the only reason he’s there. 

[+ DrownedBoy]

19 hours ago, Raifish said:

I’m kind of in a weird headspace lately, I think from the world ending, but I’ve had two great masseur and one escort service. Each of them I think I’ve developed feelings for and fantasize seeing romantically.

You developed feelings for 3 different men you hired?

I think you might be mistaking your feelings.

[TT3690]

I think relationships can be a little more complex than just transactional over time and that any idea of emotional attachment should not be so quickly dismissed. But from the sound of it you're developing feelings for multiple guys very quickly which seems pretty unsustainable.

[jtwalker]

I developed feelings for a provider once, so I just cut him off.  Deep down, I know he is an actor, and I need to keep my head straight.

[pubic_assistance]

On 8/29/2022 at 1:50 AM, Dante said:

It's a very human thing to catch feelings of some sort or another, and to have fantasies. It's not necessarily a problem to have them.  You've just got to be careful how you indulge those feelings

Exactly.

Fantasies aren't reality.

Only Disney ( and most guys on Rentmasseur) guarantee a happy ending.

Edited September 3, 2022 by pubic_assistance

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 8/30/2022 at 6:55 PM, TT3690 said:

I think relationships can be a little more complex than just transactional over time and that any idea of emotional attachment should not be so quickly dismissed. But from the sound of it you're developing feelings for multiple guys very quickly which seems pretty unsustainable.

I think that is more of the issue than the actual transaction. Falling for more than 1 guy at a time can be a bit much.