+ KensingtonHomo Posted July 10, 2022 Share Posted July 10, 2022 32 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said: You were the hall monitor in elementary school weren't you ? LOL - were you Regina George? Walt, FewBricksShy and TorontoDrew 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Massageislife Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 It doesn’t happen a lot on this site—which is a treasure, by the way—but I’m always stunned on the rare occasions when commenters use right-wing language like “woke,” “canceled,” or, in an instance on a past thread, “social justice warrior.” These terms are all meant to diminish efforts to protect and honor people who have been and continue to be subject to every kind of abuse and violence—like the queer men this site primarily serves! I don’t know what commenters would get out of throwing out insults about someone’s weight, age, etc., which add an unnecessary toxicity to this place of deep, human pleasure. Thank you all who call it out every time. ❤️ Walt, pubic_assistance, jtwalker and 3 others 1 3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted August 31, 2022 Author Share Posted August 31, 2022 (edited) 7 minutes ago, Massageislife said: These terms are all meant to diminish efforts to protect and honor people who have been and continue to be subject to every kind of abuse and violence— The term "woke" is not only right wing vocabulary. Some of us are bored by victim mentality being pulled out as a weak defense of every disagreement. You dishonor people who have genuinely been abused by jumping on the bandwagon and declaring every disagreement a hate crime / racism or abuse . Edited August 31, 2022 by pubic_assistance Marc in Calif, rn901, + Vegas_Millennial and 2 others 1 1 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Slater Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 Moderator's note: gents, if you want to discuss wokeness or politics in general, take it to the political forum. This thread is about opining on the appearance of escorts. rvwnsd, Asterisk, MikeBiDude and 1 other 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeThomas Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 48 minutes ago, Massageislife said: It doesn’t happen a lot on this site—which is a treasure, by the way—but I’m always stunned on the rare occasions when commenters use right-wing language like “woke,” “canceled,” or, in an instance on a past thread, “social justice warrior.” These terms are all meant to diminish efforts to protect and honor people who have been and continue to be subject to every kind of abuse and violence—like the queer men this site primarily serves! I don’t know what commenters would get out of throwing out insults about someone’s weight, age, etc., which add an unnecessary toxicity to this place of deep, human pleasure. Thank you all who call it out every time. ❤️ I thought this site primarily (not exclusively) serves Gay men. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted August 31, 2022 Author Share Posted August 31, 2022 19 minutes ago, MikeThomas said: I thought this site primarily (not exclusively) serves Gay men. There are several bisexual men who are part of the community here + glutes, Massageislife and MikeBiDude 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CuriousByNature Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 16 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said: There are several bisexual men who are part of the community here And the curious amongst us... pubic_assistance, MikeBiDude, Massageislife and 1 other 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enchanted Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 On 7/8/2022 at 8:48 PM, FewBricksShy said: This is an important point. I’ve actually asked providers who post pictures of themselves with different hair color what it is right now. I don’t think that’s unfair. We’re cataloging through these guys to find something that potentially pleases us. It’s already a marker, and provider’s should know they’re going to be assessed on things that might be superficial. We’re not looking to become soulmates or life partners here. We’re looking for a business transaction. The business is intimate and personal, but it’s still business. So it’s okay to assess based off likes and dislikes, but there’s definitely a way to do that which is professional and polite. No need to be rude or hateful about it. THIS∆∆∆∆∆∆ TorontoDrew and Massageislife 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted August 31, 2022 Author Share Posted August 31, 2022 (edited) On 7/8/2022 at 8:48 PM, FewBricksShy said: . We’re cataloging through these guys to find something that potentially pleases us. It’s already a marker, and provider’s should know they’re going to be assessed on things that might be superficial. We’re not looking to become soulmates or life partners here. Exactly. Men are by nature visual creatures. So appearances are am important component of attraction. We arent discussing a dating site and even there men are going to priorotize looks first /personality later. It's been a long time that I listened to people who hire masseurs primarily on their looks and worry about their skills as a secondary consideration. No matter how much you try and apply today's sensitivity toward exclusion, you're never going to get people to ignore their natural tendency to find some things attractive and some things unattractive. It's human nature and definitely a very core male characteristic of desire. Edited August 31, 2022 by pubic_assistance Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted August 31, 2022 Author Share Posted August 31, 2022 On 6/20/2022 at 7:29 PM, BaronArtz said: You must look pretty hot. Mind posting a picture of yourself? Let US be the judge ... There's a picture of me in my profile. Go to town . Luv2play 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeThomas Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 43 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said: There are several bisexual men who are part of the community here Yup, that’s why I said not exclusively 😊 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Massageislife Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 1 hour ago, pubic_assistance said: Exactly. Men are by nature visual creatures. So appearances are am important component of attraction. We arent discussing a dating site and even there men are going to priorotize looks first /personality later. It's been a long time that I listened to people who hire masseurs primarily on their looks and worry about their skills as a secondary consideration. No matter how much you try and apply today's sensitivity toward exclusion, you're never going to get people to ignore their natural tendency to find some things attractive and some things unattractive. It's human nature and definitely a very core male characteristic of desire. Your post is unnecessary. Everyone has preferences in what they desire, and no one is trying to change anyone else’s. The point here is civility. We’re a community of people of various sizes, ages, and genders. Those areas can be addressed without verging into insult. Walt, Peter Eater, Marc in Calif and 1 other 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ KensingtonHomo Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 2 hours ago, CuriousByNature said: And the curious amongst us... The person who posted referenced queer men which would be inclusive of bisexual, pansexual, questioning, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ KensingtonHomo Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said: No matter how much you try and apply today's sensitivity toward exclusion, you're never going to get people to ignore their natural tendency to find some things attractive and some things unattractive. It's human nature and definitely a very core male characteristic of desire. This is just essentializing the incentives and markers of late-stage capitalism and patriarchy to some biological imperative. It's not. While biology plays a role, our desires are primarily shaped by our experiences, cultures, and psychology. All of these are also geographically and historically situated. For example, as recently as WWII, a man was not considered queer unless he bottomed. (See George Chauncey's Gay New York. In much the same way, how we discuss even physical characteristics are historically and culturally constructed. No one is saying we don't have your preferences and turn-ons. That's cool. What some of us object to is using degrading and dehumanizing language ("fat," "ugly," racial tropes, etc.) to describe providers. It's not that hard. People post about guys I don't find remotely desirable ALL THE TIME. And I don't comment on them. I feel no need to "yuck someone's yum" or to say nasty things about sex workers. If a client has a concern that the person they're going to meet with may look different, ask for a quick FaceTime or for them to send a current time stamped pic. Peter Eater, Walt, Massageislife and 3 others 2 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walt Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 2 hours ago, pubic_assistance said: Exactly....Men are by nature visual creatures....No matter how much you try and apply today's sensitivity toward exclusion, you're never going to get people to ignore their natural tendency to find some things attractive and some things unattractive. It's human nature and definitely a very core male characteristic of desire. Heaven forbid that anyone should try to rise above the natural base animal instincts to be a mean bully, right? + KensingtonHomo and Marc in Calif 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guru68 Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 6 hours ago, pubic_assistance said: There's a picture of me in my profile. Go to town . Nice back, but I have to confess the embarrassing truth that I only just now realized that your handle is "pubic" not "public" assistance. And I wonder why I'm still single. + nycman and + BenjaminNicholas 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ DrownedBoy Posted August 31, 2022 Share Posted August 31, 2022 4 hours ago, Walt said: Heaven forbid that anyone should try to rise above the natural base animal instincts to be a mean bully, right? Heaven forbid that the community here should act any more civil than the gay community at large. I have to listen to enough sniping between people on age/weight/appearance/hair/masculinity/etc. in real life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest davebk Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 One of the most basic human urges is to correct other people's behavior. Some on this board really enjoy it. If you like a comment or find it helpful, give it a like. If you don't, keep scrolling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luv2play Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 20 hours ago, pubic_assistance said: Exactly. Men are by nature visual creatures. So appearances are am important component of attraction. We arent discussing a dating site and even there men are going to priorotize looks first /personality later. It's been a long time that I listened to people who hire masseurs primarily on their looks and worry about their skills as a secondary consideration. No matter how much you try and apply today's sensitivity toward exclusion, you're never going to get people to ignore their natural tendency to find some things attractive and some things unattractive. It's human nature and definitely a very core male characteristic of desire. I disagree we are not talking about dating. Even though money comes into it, I always consider my connections to escorts to be dates I am going on. And I am always hopeful they will turn out to be memorable dates on the positive side. But just like when I was younger and in the "free marketplace", they all turn out differently, great, good, so-so and forgettable. Epigonos and + nycman 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ nycman Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 (edited) 39 minutes ago, Luv2play said: I always consider my connections to escorts to be dates I am going on. I do the same thing. I get ready just like I’m going on a date. The escorts that are repeat hires do the same. They show up, on time, rested, showered, and ready to have a good time. Yes, I’m fully aware it’s not a "date-date", but who the fuck cares. If it feels the same, then it’s a date, and I treat it like one. Edited September 1, 2022 by nycman Luv2play, + FrankR, mike carey and 2 others 3 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted September 1, 2022 Author Share Posted September 1, 2022 (edited) 18 hours ago, KensingtonHomo said: This is just essentializing the incentives and markers of late-stage capitalism and patriarchy to some biological imperative You talk like my wife's lesbian friends ... I think some people are frank in their conversational style and some like to talk around things in a Southern Belle style. Beyond the analysis of Lesbian hatred of Patriarchal Society, this is a group of men sharing their opinions about providers not WITH providers. No one is CALLING anyone "fat", because they aren't HERE! Same way I wouldn't call one of my wife's friends fat to her face but I can certainly say it to my wife and she will giggle. Edited September 1, 2022 by pubic_assistance punctuation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted September 1, 2022 Author Share Posted September 1, 2022 7 minutes ago, nycman said: Yes, I’m fully aware it’s not a "date-date", What I meant by "dating" was you're not searching for a long term partner. ( But maybe I'm wrong ...maybe some of you are ). I'm already married so I guess it never occurred to me that anyone would "date" an escort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luv2play Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 31 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said: What I meant by "dating" was you're not searching for a long term partner. ( But maybe I'm wrong ...maybe some of you are ). I'm already married so I guess it never occurred to me that anyone would "date" an escort. Which raises the question: do you actually hire escorts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pubic_assistance Posted September 1, 2022 Author Share Posted September 1, 2022 40 minutes ago, Luv2play said: Which raises the question: do you actually hire escorts? I have ..yes. Generally; my interest is in masseurs. If someone really is really exceptional, I am willing to pay to get what I want. I am by all means a proud Capitalist. 😉 Luv2play and + KensingtonHomo 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Epigonos Posted September 1, 2022 Share Posted September 1, 2022 (edited) When I check out a 411 post that one of our members puts up and the escort is TOTALLY NOT my type I've been known to make the following comment. "Totally not my type too many/much "xyz" but isn't that great. Damn I'm glad we are not all looking for the same type of escorts. If we were hiring would become near impossible. Viva la difference". I see nothing wrong with that comment. Edited September 1, 2022 by Epigonos pubic_assistance, + keroscenefire, Walt and 2 others 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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