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How often do you reschedule on clients?


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I have pretty limited experiences with hiring, but pretty much every guy I've seen so far has either rescheduled days or shifted the scheduled time we set in advance. I get that things happen sometimes, but as a client hiring someone for the first time, it makes me a little nervous, especially when it's the day of a session. It makes me worry that the escort isn't serious or focused on making the session a good one.

Is it just a common thing to constantly ask clients to shift around a scheduled appointment?

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I think it’s bad form to do that. Once a time and date is settled and agreed I try my best to stick to it and will very rarely ask to alter it. I cancelled a client a month ago because I’d double booked myself by mistake (caused by confusion over time zones) but would never cancel or reschedule because the time no longer suited me.

I think sometimes what happens is the escort has a better offer or is trying to squeeze in an additional client or activity, so he tries to reschedule to make it all work. 

It isn’t very professional to do that and I think would annoy clients so I don’t do it unless it’s essential. Once an agreement is made then it’s not going to change unless I’m sick.

Unfortunately on the other side you do get clients who book but then cancel last minute or even fail to show. Today I had a client booked for a certain time during the day but he asked to bring it forward by half hour. I was free so I agreed. No problem.

It works both ways…people get delayed or sick so I’m always willing to take these things into consideration. 

 

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28 minutes ago, Jamie21 said:

It works both ways…people get delayed or sick so I’m always willing to take these things into consideration. 

 

Thanks for the feedback! I agree and feel quite the same. Even with friends, I try not to reschedule or shift things around too much because everyone considers their own time valuable. I'm supposed to be seeing someone who asked if I could push the session an hour ahead or back, and when I asked to have it earlier, he then asked to have it be for a bit later instead. Things like that leave me feeling iffy. Not necessarily a big red flag off the bat, but I just have no idea how common practice it is.

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If as a client I have to reschedule, I try to do so as soon as I know I am going to have a problem making the date. Typically I schedule two weeks or more in advance as I usually travel some distance.

Today I had to cancel a session I had for tomorrow as I cut my lip this afternoon in an accident and it is now swollen and discolored. I immediately contacted the escort, whom I have had one previous session alnost two weeks ago. He hasn't responded yet.

If the same had happened to him, I would understand. As they say, s**t happens.

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i find it really unprofessional unless there is a good reason. Most of the time, you can tell from the text messages. With someone I met before, I am a lot more understanding and patient if I know this provider is a good guy but there are many providers who do not care. I recently booked a session with a guy (first time for us) and I confirmed a day before. On the day of the session, I had a brief exchange of texts around noon and reconfirmed the appointment. he was all ok and I asked him to text me when he is on the way (i gave my address already). I was out in the afternoon but when I came back an hour before the appointment (he would need only 20-30 mins to come to me) i noticed he texted me a few hours ago while I was offline and asked me such a random question about condom: if I have a condom. Of course I have it and i also think that top providers always keep some with them, so it was weird. Anyway, I said, I have condoms and then he replied and he said I didn't respond in a timely manner, so he booked another client and can't come anymore. I was so pissed because I confirmed twice including the same day and gave my address. He had my number so if having a condom or not was so important he could have just called me because he knew I was offline (i show my last seen on whatsapp publicly  and he is the same). I emptied my night for him and was super horny, so it made things worse. Anyway, I think he just found another customer, maybe he offered him a longer session or over night, so there was more money there. Just really unprofessional but he said he can meet another day. Hell no. The most disappointing part was that he said on his profile he takes pride in his job, enjoys this job and values the client blah blah. Just a bs in my opinion, so I never even bothered to reschedule. As much as providers value their time and charge a rate for their hours, clients pay that amount, so their time is probably equally valuable. I hate providers who only think about their own time but not the clients' time as well. I don't think a good sex will be provided by selfish people like them.  

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Twice I received a message like the following:

"Hi. I have to cancel our date for today because I just got asked to fly to XXXXXXX for the weekend and am leaving in an hour. I am sure you will understand."

I replied, "I understand completely, but you will also understand that I will never contact you again."

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I always text the provider when I’m on my way and get a response. But lately, when texting upon arrival in the hotel lobby, I get nothing right away. I wait ten minsince I usually book a 2 hour session,  so no answer in those ten minutes… I go back home! Usually ten minutes later, I get the “Sorry dude come back” text. If you cannot respect my time when I show up at the agreed upon appointment, then you don’t deserve my business.

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On 3/10/2022 at 5:10 PM, Jamie21 said:

I think sometimes what happens is the escort has a better offer or is trying to squeeze in an additional client or activity, so he tries to reschedule to make it all work. 

 

But not always…

This thread relates to another thread I put up about advertising travels in advance. I admit I have needed to move schedules around a bit, but it wasn’t so much of a “Meet me at hotel XXX at 6 p.m.” but more of a “I will be arriving to your city this week, what DAYS are you available.” They’ll either claim to be free whenever, or will offer me only ONE day within an extreme narrow time window that they can meet, and then expect me to perform miracles and just drop my life to accommodate.

And see, some clients will run with that and try to gaslight me into believing we never had any expectation of an appointment. Yeah umm…I’m not a time genie that pulls out schedules out of a hat. It’s all about coordinating. And some clients don’t want to coordinate: they expect us to magically appear when and where they want us without any compromise. It’s like: First I coordinate, get an idea of what is even possible. Then, once I see an alignment of both schedules, l can go ahead and narrow down a time and place.

But what (some) clients want to do is say: “hey you, I’m available NOW. Or, Tomorrow at 3 p.m. ummm, sir…you just walked into my life 3 minutes ago. Do you have a clue of what the actual FUCK may be going on it? No? Well…Maybe don’t assume seeing an ad on a website means I have nothing better to do than point my dick in your direction at your beck and call.

And the funny thing is: they never do the same for us. That’s why I’m getting less accommodating to clients these days. They want us to go out of our way, but they don’t want to go out of their way. So why the fuck should I? Just because someone is paying me, isn’t permission to treat my schedule and responsibilities as less important than yours.  

Edited by Jarrod_Uncut
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I don’t agree. They’re the client…they choose the time that works for them. If I’m free then fine..it gets booked. If I’m busy then sorry I can’t do it and we all move on. If they mess around a lot with scheduling it’s always my option to simply decline to engage or block them, which I do occasionally. 

This is a customer service business. I’m not expecting my customers to consider what else I’m doing or whether my plans get messed up etc. They want to see me at a certain time so it’s then over to me to decide yes or no. It’s as simple as that. What else is happening in my life / schedule is my issue not theirs.

I don’t travel to other cities, all my business is in London. That makes logistics simpler. I think if I travelled it would make things too complicated but still it would be my choice to operate like that and so my issue to deal with the complications. 

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2 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

I don’t agree. They’re the client…they choose the time that works for them. If I’m free then fine..it gets booked. If I’m busy then sorry I can’t do it and we all move on. If they mess around a lot with scheduling it’s always my option to simply decline to engage or block them, which I do occasionally. 

This is a customer service business. I’m not expecting my customers to consider what else I’m doing or whether my plans get messed up etc. They want to see me at a certain time so it’s then over to me to decide yes or no. It’s as simple as that. What else is happening in my life / schedule is my issue not theirs.

I don’t travel to other cities, all my business is in London. That makes logistics simpler. I think if I travelled it would make things too complicated but still it would be my choice to operate like that and so my issue to deal with the complications. 

Well, it’s not a matter of agreeing or disagreeing, because you’re not necessarily operating the same way…you just said it that you don’t travel outside of London. So booking sessions outside of town is an entirely different concept for you.
 

A client can choose what time works for them, but it also goes both ways. You can’t just have it working for just one person and not the other. When I work with photographers, and do my photo shoot gigs, I still have to work with their schedule and availability. 
 

I’m not suggesting that it’s okay to constantly change plans, but like I said…sometimes it’s a matter of coordinating schedules. Nothing can work if both parties aren’t in a position to meet. 

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On 3/10/2022 at 7:10 PM, Jamie21 said:

I think it’s bad form to do that. Once a time and date is settled and agreed I try my best to stick to it and will very rarely ask to alter it. I cancelled a client a month ago because I’d double booked myself by mistake (caused by confusion over time zones) but would never cancel or reschedule because the time no longer suited me.

I think sometimes what happens is the escort has a better offer or is trying to squeeze in an additional client or activity, so he tries to reschedule to make it all work. 

It isn’t very professional to do that and I think would annoy clients so I don’t do it unless it’s essential. Once an agreement is made then it’s not going to change unless I’m sick.

Unfortunately on the other side you do get clients who book but then cancel last minute or even fail to show. Today I had a client booked for a certain time during the day but he asked to bring it forward by half hour. I was free so I agreed. No problem.

It works both ways…people get delayed or sick so I’m always willing to take these things into consideration. 

 

In this subject, if I as a client book an escort first time or not and I (had to) cancel at last minute (1-3 hours) as a courtesy I am to give some compensation for their lost time but if the escort cancel on me last minute and I have already separated that time from my agenda shouldn’t he return the courtesy of providing a choice of replacements that could take over his session?!

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25 minutes ago, DapperGent said:

In this subject, if I as a client book an escort first time or not and I (had to) cancel at last minute (1-3 hours) as a courtesy I am to give some compensation for their lost time but if the escort cancel on me last minute and I have already separated that time from my agenda shouldn’t he return the courtesy of providing a choice of replacements that could take over his session?!

If a client cancels on me last minute it’s my problem. I don’t expect compensation for it and I don’t take deposits (too much of a disincentive to book). If you’re offering compensation as a courtesy that’s fine (and good of you) but if an escort or masseur cancels on you last minute then they wouldn’t offer compensation except perhaps for an alternative time or a discount on a future booking if they want to retain your goodwill. 

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3 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

A client can choose what time works for them, but it also goes both ways.

It does, but as the client is paying then it’s their prerogative to choose the time and manner of booking that suits them primarily, not you.  I don’t think you can legitimately complain that clients aren’t booking far enough in advance or at suitable times to fit your travel schedule. Ok so if that means they miss out on you it’s tough (on them as well as you) but I do think it’s necessary to adapt yourself to the market… even if the market seems unfair or wrong. 

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22 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

If a client cancels on me last minute it’s my problem. I don’t expect compensation for it and I don’t take deposits (too much of a disincentive to book). If you’re offering compensation as a courtesy that’s fine (and good of you) but if an escort or masseur cancels on you last minute then they wouldn’t offer compensation except perhaps for an alternative time or a discount on a future booking if they want to retain your goodwill. 

So if the client cancelled on you when you had another possible client interested but, you had to decline him because your previous appointment that now just cancelled, is not an issue for you? I mean, I suppose the rate of clients faking on service providers at last minute is low?

Edited by DapperGent
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2 hours ago, DapperGent said:

So if the client cancelled on you when you had another possible client interested but, you had to decline him because your previous appointment that now just cancelled, is not an issue for you? I mean, I suppose the rate of clients faking on service providers at last minute is low?

It is an issue for me, yes of course if it is because I have lost an opportunity for income. But it happens and it can’t be avoided. I guess I decline 30 to 40% of requests because I cannot do the time the client requests or they want a discount (I never discount). On top of that I get a few clients booking and then cancelling beforehand for various reasons. And occasionally a no show (which is very rare; I can recognise the signs and screen out those clients). 

It’s frustrating to ‘lose’ so much business but because of my commitments (other work etc) then I can’t be available 24/7. I’m very flexible with my time so if clients book a day or so in advance I can usually accommodate them but lots of people want to book last minute and unfortunately that is challenging for me. 

Edited by Jamie21
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On 3/14/2022 at 3:03 PM, Jamie21 said:

It does, but as the client is paying then it’s their prerogative to choose the time and manner of booking that suits them primarily, not you.  I don’t think you can legitimately complain that clients aren’t booking far enough in advance or at suitable times to fit your travel schedule. Ok so if that means they miss out on you it’s tough (on them as well as you) but I do think it’s necessary to adapt yourself to the market… even if the market seems unfair or wrong. 

I’m not complaining, I’m just saying that if a client wants to make something happen with a certain provider, they do have to book according to how the provider prefers it to be done. That’s just facts. Regardless. You don’t go to a restaurant and push around wait staff to stay later or earlier than posted. Same concept.

I think instead of coming off like a one size fits all, maybe you just need to admit that not every escort operates the same way. You come off like you don’t really give a fuck if clients cancel on you or not. That’s your prerogative. It’s already been discussed you have another job that you do outside of sex work. Good for you 👏🏽 

But don’t make it seem like everybody should go by your concept. I have no issues asking for deposits and cancellation fees from clients. And I get them. I wish I could just do things laxy dazy and if they show they show, if not they don’t: but guess what: I did that before, and suffered the by-products of it. Hell, one client sent me $400 by next day mail, because he canceled on me as I was traveling to his city (7.5 hours away), and couldn’t reschedule when I arrived the next day.


I also canceled an appointment for tomorrow morning because the client wouldn’t send me a deposit. He wants me to do something that would require extra time and effort on my part: and I can’t 100% trust that he’ll show up. So I’m not going to go thru the trouble of doing it. Once again: Experience has taught me that I’ve done it before without taking a deposit, and had my time wasted. So I won’t do it again.

You obviously seem okay with taking bigger risks, I’m not. But don’t downplay my intuition ☝Deposits have avoided me a ton of bullshit that I dealt with in A LOT in places like Florida, the Midwest, and pretty much the whole United States (if you’ve never worked here, you may not understand how flaky the gay male sex scene is). 

Edited by Jarrod_Uncut
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1 hour ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

I’m not complaining, I’m just saying that if a client wants to make something happen with a certain provider, they do have to book according to how the provider prefers it to be done. That’s just facts.

It sounds like you’re not happy with how it’s working though? Maybe I’m misreading you and that everything is fine but it doesn’t seem like it from what you say. sorry to hear it. 

I agree if they want to use you then they have to comply with your booking arrangements and availability. Same with me, and I work on a different model. But if you find that there’s insufficient clients willing to hire that way then perhaps the model isn’t right for the market? It’s then a decision to change the model or change the market. Since the market is difficult to change it leaves you in a quandary. 

The scene is flaky here too. Yesterday I had gone to the trouble of lining up another masseur for a 4 hands a client wanted. He had specific requirements about what he wanted and the type of masseur to work with me. So I booked the venue and set it all up. The client confirms and agreed the rate which included my rate for the more escort type service he wanted. Then an hour after it’s all set up he messages to say he can’t afford it. Probably looking for me to discount it. I just said “ok thanks” and cancelled the appointment. Waste of time for all of us, but nothing I can do about it except note it for future when he inevitably contacts me again…

Everyone has to find the model that works for them. If yours works that’s great but I get the feeling from your posts that it doesn’t work as well as you’d like it to, and that the market needs to change to fit your model. Good luck with it but I think you’re going to find the market prevails unfortunately. 

 

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15 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

It sounds like you’re not happy with how it’s working though? Maybe I’m misreading you and that everything is fine but it doesn’t seem like it from what you say. sorry to hear it. 

I agree if they want to use you then they have to comply with your booking arrangements and availability. Same with me, and I work on a different model. But if you find that there’s insufficient clients willing to hire that way then perhaps the model isn’t right for the market? It’s then a decision to change the model or change the market. Since the market is difficult to change it leaves you in a quandary. 

The scene is flaky here too. Yesterday I had gone to the trouble of lining up another masseur for a 4 hands a client wanted. He had specific requirements about what he wanted and the type of masseur to work with me. So I booked the venue and set it all up. The client confirms and agreed the rate which included my rate for the more escort type service he wanted. Then an hour after it’s all set up he messages to say he can’t afford it. Probably looking for me to discount it. I just said “ok thanks” and cancelled the appointment. Waste of time for all of us, but nothing I can do about it except note it for future when he inevitably contacts me again…

Everyone has to find the model that works for them. If yours works that’s great but I get the feeling from your posts that it doesn’t work as well as you’d like it to, and that the market needs to change to fit your model. Good luck with it but I think you’re going to find the market prevails unfortunately. 

 

Well tbh, I have my ways of adapting. The “market” as you describe it varies city to city, state to state. I may can’t change the market but I can change my location which by default changes the market.

Case in point: I’ve just taken my 6th client in 3 days. I have a 7th one on the way. (All were booked with ample notice and I didn’t even need to collect deposits because they passed the screening with flying colors, though a couple didn’t follow thru…and they sent cancellations out of courtesy) I could never have done this in my home market because I can’t ever get shit done because people BS so much. 

So: it’s all relative. I know it may sound like I’m bitching, but that’s not the case. It’s just promoting a better way to arrange bookings. In my opinion it sounds like you just let guys just do whatever they want without holding them to anything. I had a client almost cancel on me today. After a heart to heart text…He cancelled his meeting and seen me instead. And he came without even touching himself 😆 

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3 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

In my opinion it sounds like you just let guys just do whatever they want without holding them to anything.

Not quite. If they cancel on me once it’s fine, things happen (illness, emergencies, travel problems etc). If it happens twice without good reason, I simply don’t take another booking from them. Never. Sometimes they forget they messed me around and they approach me again to book but I decline saying they flaked previously. 

Most of my clients are regular returning clients. I built up regular clients over the years because I think that’s the best way. Give a professional top quality and always fresh service and people return. There’s so many poor operators in the industry (flaky providers are more common than flaky clients) that if you’re professional and skilled you stand out.

Regular clients are reliable; a trust and respect has been created. When you know the other person there’s more of an obligation. With some first time clients I guess it’s easy for them to cancel or flake because the other person (me) is ‘just someone doing sex work’ …and I do get that vibe when these type of people book. I’m usually right. It’s amazing how the patterns of the flaky clients repeat. I don’t get many of these now but I book them in anyway and give the benefit of the doubt, but with a 75% expectation they’ll cancel or no show. 

After some trial and error this model works well for me, other models work too depending on the market where you operate…but the fundamental and essential element of any way of working in this industry is to give a fantastic and professional service to your clients. Each one is special. 

 

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40 minutes ago, Jamie21 said:

Not quite. If they cancel on me once it’s fine, things happen (illness, emergencies, travel problems etc). If it happens twice without good reason, I simply don’t take another booking from them. Never.

I agree with all the above. Except sometimes it depends on “how” they cancel they 1st time that defines whether it’s fine. Some 1st time cancels are not redeemable, if it’s a booking that involved some degree of trouble (meaning extended effort) to get to. Those would include cancellations that occur en route to the booking, or if I am booked into a hotel and they flake.
 

My thing is: I don’t even want to let it happen twice. Once is too many times (and to be fair, assuming it’s a confirmed booking). Like I said, one guy even sent me a deposit and cancelled, and we’re done. Not because he canceled, but because I went thru a lot of effort to modify my morning and afternoon to accommodate our booking that was planned prior, and he flaked. But it’s water under the bridge now, because I’ve made up the loss x20. 

Edited by Jarrod_Uncut
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Shit happens. I allow one last minute reschedule for someone I’ve never met. After that there is no second one.

I have one escort that I love who happens to have joint custody of a kid and sometimes he has last minute issues. I cut him some slack because he is worth it.

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